Blame this on Pande she made me write this so BLAME HER!!!

Jack had been gone for almost a year now, and no-one (not even Gwen) knew where he was. They all had a fairly good idea though...

"Oh come on Ianto grow up he's off making out with his 'Doctor'," Owen moaned throwing an empty beer can into the small black bin next to the Welshman's foot.

"No he is probably off saving the world with someone, or he could be in trouble, maybe he's hurt did you ever think of that?" Ianto replied infuriated by the medic's response. Owen shrugged off Ianto's opinion and stood up theatrically.

"Oh Doctor I luuurve you kisskisskiss," Owen laughed spinning on his foot.

"Oh but Jack-y I find you infuriating!" Gwen walked in grinning as she walked over towards the group.

"Infuriating? Me!? But I love you, we should make out!" Owen said in a sing-song and terrible American accent whilst putting an arm around Gwen's arm and staring into the ceiling in a dramatic pose.

"Oh! Gasp! How terrible I am against your tiny means in Torchwood, we should not be together!" Gwen gasped her large brown eyes opening widely to look at Owen as she flicked a piece of her hair back over her shoulder.

"But we are meant for each other!" Owen grabbed Gwen's waist as the two pretended to kiss theatrically, Ianto laughed and Tosh's quiet giggles opened into a high laughter.

"Bravo, really you two should think of acting as a career," Laughed Captain Jack Harkness who was standing enigmatically in front of the cog door which was rolling quietly. Owen and Gwen turned to look at the voice as did Ianto and Toshiko, with an shell shocked expression...Well Owen, Tosh and Ianto were shell shocked, Gwen just looked a little embarrassed.

"Jack your here are you okay?!" Mumbled Ianto quickly, standing up off the sofa and towards the captain.

"Yes, yes I'm fine honestly, I'm too brilliant to get ill!" Jack grinned his trademark 100watt grin and looked at Gwen and Owen, causing Gwen to blush even more. "But you see it was a little more toned-down then that, unfortunately," Jack laughed "although I can guess what you lot were like, I bet Owen was all," Jack stood straight and flung his greatcoat over one shoulder and mimicked a Londoner accent, "aright' 'en Jackie-boy ain't 'ere so 'm in charge oryte people?" He grinned at the end of his impression and bowed at Ianto's clap.

"Oh yes sir and then Gwen was rather like," Ianto sat down again and picked up a magazine of Gwen which just happened to be laying at the arm of the sofa Brides weekly Jack noted, him and Gwen would be having words later. "Oh no you're not Owen, I am in charge whilst Jack is away seeing as I am hard working, tidy, brilliant and all roundedly the most amazing person here!" He pouted and shrugged at Gwen's accusing glance, "It's true...you are brilliant Gwen," Ianto smiled at Gwen, which Gwen returned giggling.

"Oh but Jones, you were worse than me thank you very much! But Tosh was funnier...remember when Myfanwy bit the screen wire?" Owen and Ianto both nodded and broke out laughing at Tosh's annoyed 'Oiii'.

"Come on Tosh its true!" Gwen sat at Owen's desk and began typing quickly at the keyboard. "OWEN! What Have YOU done to be computer!?! It's broken completely and utterly ruined!" Gwen whined glaring at Owen.

"Oh I ain't touched it Tosh 'onest darlin' it weren't me I was busy playing on the computer.....I mean doing this autopsy," Mimicked Tosh putting on a hurt expression.

"Oh you see it may...coincidently be partially my fault," Owen stood up with a welsh accent, straightening his imaginary tie. "You see I was cleaning Myfanwy when my phone went...I had to answer it and I accidently left her cage open for a second," Owen glanced at the ceiling looking embarrassed.

Jack was grinning from ear to ear and chuckling whole-heartedly during the performance as his team did the same, Gwen and Owen laughing the loudest their laughter filling the silence of the hub with their giggles.

"Hang on who's Myfanwy?" asked Jack, leaning against the sofa with an arm wrapped around Gwen's waist and his head against the sofa.

"The pterodactyl," They all said at the same time in between giggles.

"So what happened then Jack?" Gwen finally asked looking up at him.

"Oh you know how it is, rocking and rolling and-" Jack was cut off by Owen.

"Quoting Grease?" Ianto asked, everyone started laughing again,

"Welcome to Torchwood." Owen laughed, "Saving the world and acting like idiots."