Disclaimer: Not mine.

This is my first attempt at fanfiction, so constructive criticism is welcome. I'm hoping that this will be a multi-chaptered story, with each chapter named after a song. It follows on from the scene in the finale when Jane shoots Hardy. They might seem a bit OOC at first, but more will be explained in the next chapter. I'm going to try to build the story up slowly, so nothing will happen as easily as it seems it will. I'm not American, so I apologise in advance for any mistakes.

Chapter One: My Eyes Have Seen You ~ The Doors

My eyes have seen you
Turn and stare
Fix your hair
Move upstairs,

My eyes have seen you
Free from disguise
Gazing on a city under
Television skies.

The SUV hadn't gone far down the road when Rigsby and Cho heard a shot ring out. Rigsby automatically slowed down, glancing at the man in the passenger seat.

"It can't be them, can it?" he asked nervously. "Hardy was knocked out and cuffed, wasn't he?" Before Cho had a chance to speak, a second gunshot gave them the answer. Rigsby wasted no time in turning around and putting his foot to the floor.

//////////////////////////////////////////

The scene when they arrived back at the house was chaotic. The paramedics who had been treating Hardy were now frantically trying to save the life of the deputy he had shot, while the local officers were all over the place, not sure what to do. As they got out of the vehicle, both men relaxed slightly at the sight of Lisbon and Jane unharmed. Jane was kneeling beside Hardy's body while Lisbon stood silently by his side, her hand resting on his shoulder.

"What happened?" asked Cho quietly as he approached them. Jane didn't move, lost in his own thoughts as Lisbon explained the situation as briefly as she could. She didn't fail to notice their surprise when they learned that Jane had fired the fatal shot, just as they didn't fail to notice that she hadn't broken contact with Jane throughout her monologue.

Realising that his boss was not in a fit state to control the situation, Cho took charge. "Rigsby and I will wait for the coroner. You and Jane should take Maya back to headquarters and let her parents know that she's been found."

Lisbon nodded gratefully. "Make sure the scene is secure. We'll need to come back tomorrow to search for any evidence of Red John."

As Lisbon walked over to talk to a plainly terrified Maya, Jane stood up slowly and turned to face Cho and Rigsby, his eyes leaving the body for the first time. He somehow looked like a different person to the one they had seen only a few hours before.

"You did the right thing, you know," Rigsby told him, anxious to provide comfort in anyway he could. He still remembered vividly the first time he had killed someone, and could understand the torrent of emotions the other man must be feeling.

"I know," was all Jane could say, before Lisbon returned with Maya.

//////////////////////////////////////////

The first part of the thirty minute journey was silent. For once, Jane had no idea of what to say to Lisbon, especially with Maya huddled in the backseat. Lisbon was clearly concerned about her, constantly checking her in the rear view mirror. Jane also noticed the subtle glances she was giving him. She was worried about him, but it was tinged with something else. He studied her more closely, trying to decipher her. He'd never admit it, but he found her harder to read than anyone else, probably because she tried so hard to keep everything from him.

The next time she looked at him he was ready. Realising that she'd been caught out, she blushed lightly, but not before Jane had seen what she was feeling. There was a distinct undercurrent of guilt, mixed with something he hadn't been expecting. Fear. She was scared of what his reaction would be, that he would blame her for the loss of their best connection to Red John.

It was the last thing Jane wanted, so he decided to relieve the awkwardness of the atmosphere in the car in the best way he knew. He continued to stare at her, making it obvious so that Lisbon wouldn't be able to ignore him. Like clockwork, her blush deepened and her hands tightened on the steering wheel as they always did when she was annoyed at him. She was tempted to say something, but resisted so that they didn't start an argument in front of the victim.

However, after two minutes of continuous staring her resolve weakened.

"Damnit Jane, can you stop doing that?"

"Doing what?"

"You know perfectly well what!"

"No, I don't."

He turned to Maya, flashing her a conspiratorial smile.

"Did you see me do anything?"

Maya, who had seen everything quite clearly from her vantage point in the backseat, was enjoying the distraction from her memories of the past few days and decided to play along.

"I'm sorry Agent Lisbon, I didn't see anything."

Unable to argue, Lisbon mumbled something under her breath and kept her attention on the road. Mission accomplished, Jane spent the rest of the trip looking out the window.

//////////////////////////////////////////

Van Pelt was waiting for them in the bullpen when they arrived. Lisbon had almost forgotten that she had called her when Hardy had been arrested, and from the look on her face when she saw Jane, Van Pelt had already been informed of the situation.

After the moment of relative normality in the car, Lisbon felt much more in control and ready to deal with what had happened. Not wanting to give Van Pelt the chance to ask any uncomfortable questions, she began giving orders straight away.

"Can you take Maya through to my office and start taking a statement? We need to sort out the paperwork before we can take her home. I'll give the Plasketts the good news and inform Minelli of the situation."

As Lisbon made the phone calls, Jane over to his couch and sat down, closing his eyes. He had no desire to hear Lisbon explain again how he'd killed the man who could have given him Red John. Instead, he used the time to process his thoughts.

A few hours ago, he'd been certain that he would have given anything, including his own life, to bring Red John to justice. He'd honestly believed that once the murderer had been caught, his life would have no further purpose. For over five years, his life had been a cycle of self-loathing and a desire for revenge, interspersed with flashes of something approaching happiness when he was with the team. He had thought that it would be impossible to move on, even if he'd wanted to.

That had changed when he saw Hardy pointing the gun at Teresa Lisbon.

Jane had known almost from the moment they had met that there was an attraction between them, but they had both decided to ignore it as best they could. Although they had never discussed it with each other, they were both aware that Jane would never be able to commit to any sort of relationship.

Until now.

Jane had only been able to admit the depth of his feelings to himself when he had seen Lisbon seconds away from death. Catching Red John didn't seem to matter as he pulled the trigger. He did not regret his decision in the slightest.

His introspection was interrupted as Lisbon finished her calls and walked over to join him, perching on the edge of one of the desks. She looked drained, both physically and emotionally, as she watched Van Pelt and Maya talking through a gap in the blinds in her office.

"You look like you need a drink," Jane told her softly. It was always a sensitive topic with Lisbon, given her father's history, but tonight she didn't argue.

"Where are you planning on finding alcohol at this time of night? It's almost one."

He merely smiled at her as he stood and walked over to his mostly disused desk. Reaching it in five long strides, he opened the bottom drawer and pulled a bottle of scotch and two glasses out from the back. He met Lisbon's disapproving look with a triumphant one of his own as he returned to the couch and gestured for her to join him.

As she sat down, he poured two large servings of the scotch and handed her one of them. Much to Jane's surprise, she downed it all in one go and held out her glass for more. Jane copied her, wincing as it burned his throat, and refilled them both immediately.

As Lisbon slowly sipped at the second glass, she realised that Jane was staring at her again. This time, the mood turned serious as they both knew that they couldn't put off the conversation they had to have.

"I'm sorry," she said, unable to meet his eyes.

"There's nothing to be sorry for."

"Yes there is! If I'd only taken away his handcuff key, none of this would have happened!"

Anger at herself was beginning to take over guilt as her primary emotion, so Jane decided to stop her then and there. He reached out and gently lifted her chin so that she was forced to look at him.

"Listen to me carefully. No one could have predicted what Hardy was going to do. If he hadn't tried to escape then, he would have tried it somewhere else and most likely been killed there instead. I don't regret, even for a moment, shooting him, so you can stop feeling guilty about that as well."

Lisbon looked at him with obvious surprise. She had expected him to react with anger, to blame her for their failure to catch Red John yet again. That she could have dealt with, but Jane being so understanding made her feel worse.

"We could have had Red John."

"We could have. But in some strange way, not catching him tonight turned out to be the right thing."

Lisbon looked at him in disbelief.

"Are you seriously trying to tell me that you are glad we didn't find Red John?"

Jane shook his head, trying to find the right words to explain how he was feeling.

"No. I still want to find Red John and make sure he's punished for everything he's done. What I'm trying to say is that if we had have caught him tonight, I never would have realised that you're right."

Lisbon felt as if she had stepped through the looking glass. The night was getting stranger by the minute, and the alcohol wasn't helping. She didn't say anything, waiting for Jane to continue. Suddenly, she was very aware that his hand was still on her face, his thumb drawing light circles against her cheek.

"There are more important things than revenge. What happened tonight showed me that I choose life, like you told me I would."

Before Lisbon could answer, they were startled by the sound of the door to Lisbon's office opening. Reluctantly, Jane dropped his hand from her face and finished off the rest of his scotch.