Ok so I was going through and reading Sai and Naruto oneshots, and I was like, " Hey I should try this and see how it goes." cause I don't really mind this pairing all that much. So here's my attempt at a SaiNaru fic. NOTE: NOT GOING TO BE A ONESHOT FRIENDS AND NEIGHBORS. Based off that episode where they were sitting next to the creepy statue and Sai got all close and Naruto thought he was going to kiss 'em but he didn't then he pulled out his book and tried to learn what to do when your friend 'misunderstands.' it made me die of laughter, until the paramedics came and revived me. idk the episode otherwise, I would have said it…lol. Sai's PV

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Naruto was afraid. I really didn't think Captain Yamato's words would cut him so deeply. But then again, I have been wrong before, and Naruto is pretty unpredictable. It seemed to be even worse after Sakura left. I thought maybe if I kept smiling at him he would calm down and know he wasn't alone. But that didn't work, I could tell when that bird flew out of the tree and he jumped, pretty much, a mile off the ground. So I did what I always did when faced with a situation I don't have much first hand experience with. Turned to my self help section of the library books. This weeks editions, 'HOW TO COMFORT YOUR FRIENDS, For Idiots.' I flipped a few pages and reread the spot about scared friends.

" If a friend is frightened or scared about something, put your hand gently on their shoulder, provide them with some warmth, and let them know they are never alone."

I nodded to myself and closed the book. I walked over to him and sat beside him. Naruto looked confused by my actions but said nothing. When I wrapped my arm around his shoulders, he seemed to not appreciate it as much as the book let on. He glared daggers at the side of my head. I knew he wanted me to let go but I wouldn't until we conquered his fear together…This might be tougher than I thought. I turned my head and he not only pulled away from me, but had the most revolted look on his face. What did I do? He pulled his arm back and cracked me hard in the face. I sat back up and he started to angrily wave his fists in the air.

" WHAT'RE YOU DOING?!" Naruto screamed at me. I stumbled to find the right words, but before I could truly answer his accusation, he cut me off. " I'M NOT INTO THAT KIND OF THING! ITS JUST WRONG!" A startling confession. For the way he was obsessed with Sasuke I thought they were long time boyfriends. But then I felt a tinge of pain. Does he feel like all gay men are gross? Ah now I was thinking too far into it, besides its better not to start a fight with my first real friend over something so multi-opinioned anyway. Naruto turned on his heel and quickly started to walk away.

" No. That's not what I meant. Uh in a case where a friend misunderstands, ah screw this book." I said throwing it too the ground and caught his wrist. " Listen I wasn't trying to pull anything on you, I just thought you were afraid then the dumb book was like go over there and comfort him. So I did and now you think I'm a big gay freak."

" Sai, I've always thought you were a big gay freak, this just proves my point." Naruto said shaking his wrist free. He started to walk away from me and he put his hands in his pockets. I needed to know something, so I followed him.

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Naruto's PV

Oh god that was WAY too close. If Sai would have kissed me I wouldn't have known what I would have done. I was pretty sure I would have kissed back, ruining my straight guy image, and knowing Sai and how he doesn't know anything that he hasn't read in a book, wouldn't keep his mouth shut about it. And it would only be made worse by the fact that I don't mind the thought of fucking Sai. But that's only because his stoicness reminds me of Sasuke. And his ridiculously good looks. He was following behind me and I knew I would never get any peace until I talked to him.

" Why are you following me?" I asked, he stopped and moved so he could face me properly. " Well?"

" Do you really think being gay is wrong?" Sai asked and my breath caught in my throat. Well obviously not because I was gay, of course Sai didn't exactly know that now did he? Unless maybe Sasuke told his something when he was with him. But I doubt that, Sasuke was pretty keen on keeping secrets on the inside.

" Why should that matter? Most men think its wrong to be gay." I said walking away. It was true, and that's why I had to hide it. None of my guy friends would give me peace for being gay. Not even Sasuke did, even though he was my lover. " Besides, its not like I offended you, cause your not gay Sai. I mean sure I joke about it but I know your not." He was silent. Then I caught on. OH MY GOD HE IS GAY! I stayed silent as he approached me, I backed up a little and he grabbed my arm. His eyes stared down into mine and I felt my face heat up. He was so close our chests were touching. His face lowered even closer to mine, his lips closer and closer, but they changed course to my ear. They rested there for a moment and I shuddered when I felt his breath on my ear. He still said nothing almost savoring the moment. I wanted to push him away but at the same moment I wanted to pull him closer, kiss him, let him claim my body like Sasuke used to.

" But Naruto, you're gay too." Sai said, he snuggled me closer and bit my ear softly. I whimpered quietly, not wanting him to hear my pleasure. " Why would you say those things? Besides everyone pretty much has guessed about you and Sasuke. In fact I'm so sure you've fucked each other that I'm willing to bet my life on it."

My heart pounded. Was I really that obvious? I've only walked funny once when Sasuke was around and everyone seemed to believe the lie I told!! What if they knew then and just accepted the excuse so they could mock me later? Uh. I hate my life. Sai moved his lips from my ear and moved his head so he could stare me in the eye. Before I knew what was going on his lips were pressed against mine and my mind was melting. It had been so long since I'd been kissed by a man. My last kiss was so long ago I don't even remember it. For someone who didn't know how to interact with people Sai really knew what he was doing. My head swan when his tongue caressed mine in such a blissful way. I moaned into his mouth and he broke us apart. I leaned in, wanting more. And he bent back down and we kissed again, his tongue touched every part of my mouth. He reached down and grabbed my ass, squeezing it until I was moaning loudly into our kisses. I grinded our hips together and it was his turn to moan. He pushed me back into a tree and attacked my neck. His kisses gave me goose bumps, they ghosted over my skin, making me shudder. I wanted more, I needed him to give me more. I didn't care if it made him think I was a whore. I wanted more.

" More." I moaned. He pulled back, and took a step back, away from me. He stared into my eyes and I whimpered, coming to meet him. He wrapped his arms around my waist and kissed my forehead. We swayed gently for a moment. Sasuke never did that for me, never just held me because he could. It always had a hidden purpose. " Please Sai?"

" Shhh. No, not now. Look at me." He said, and I looked at him. He cradled my face in his hand and kissed my lips. " We can't do that on a mission, you know that. Plus what if Sakura or Captain Yamato came back? That wouldn't exactly be good now would it? Also before I do that, I want a relationship, something more than just an one-night stand."

I kissed him. " Ok, we can be boyfriends. Cause believe it or not I really do like you Sai. And I want you for more than just sex. Its just that I haven't got any in a while. Plus your right, having sex right now would be really stupid."

" Sai, Naruto!" Sakura called. " We found the priests we were supposed to meet! Get a move on!"

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TO SASUKE

" OH FUCK NO!" Sasuke yelled while watching Naruto in his crystal ball. The anger pulsed in his veins. So his little blonde thought that just because Sai was there and he wasn't that bastard could take his place? Sasuke didn't think so. He got off his bed, tossed the crystal backwards so I would land on the soft mattress. He reached out for the door and Orochimaru was waiting outside. " Get the fuck out of my face snake man."

" Oh someone's touchy today." Orochimaru said as Sasuke passed him. " So what happened? I told you if you watched Naruto something was going to piss you off. Let me guess him and that Sai guy are hooking up."

Sasuke stopped and stared back at the snake, who was smirking. Damn sometimes he was too smart for his own good. The Uchiha nodded, and walked farther away.

" Well Sasuke you left the village Naruto needs someone to comfort him. Besides he's not your property." Kabuto said adjusting his glasses.

" Where the hell are you coming from? You both popped out of nowhere." Sasuke said confused. But he glared at both of them. " well first off I don't give a fuck. I saw and fucked him first, he's mine. Second, he is totally mine, I've claimed his body for my own too many times to be counted. So if you'll excuse me I'll be off killing dirty sluts know as Sai."

" What? You can't leave!" Orochimaru began, Kabuto cut him off by standing in front of him. The two of them huddled together and Sasuke watched from the outside, rolling his eyes at them.

" Let him go. Knowing him, he'll retrieve Naruto and we'll have him under our control." He said fixing his glasses. Again. Orochimaru smirked and popped his head up.

" Have fun killing Sai, Sasuke. Make sure you break the spine and walk away. It gets them every time."

Sasuke gave a final wave and walked out of the base, into the sunlight. It would be a few days before he reached Naruto so Sasuke decided he needed to get some reinforcements.

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Oh snap son, what's going to happen to Sai? WILL SAI AND NARUTO HAVE SMEX?! Guess you'll have to wait to find out.

Naruto: Sai and me?
Me: yep
Naruto: Why?
Me: Cause I like Sai, he humors me.
Sai: Is there something wrong me Naruto-kun?
Me: Yeah is there?
Sasuke: Yes you're an evil assface who needs to stop being exactly like me
Naruto: Yeah?Me: Well we'll get this straightened out later, for now this is Hitoko-sama
Sai: SASUKE HAS A SMALL PENIS!
Sasuke: He's DEAD!
Me: -sigh-