Warning: the following chapter contains excessive usage of Internet culture references, possible plot development, and the spelling of "colour" with a "u". Please read with caution.

Waking Up In Vegas

Chapter Seven - Plum Purple

"What do you mean 'you're leaving'?!"

Kaname and Zero found themselves with a strange sense of déjà vu as they stared with wide eyes at the figure of Ichiru, currently standing by the doorway looking fabulous with his rhinestoned suitcases and duffel bag by his feet. He was apparently going to leave on a so-called "business trip" and wasn't going to be back for a week.

"Chill, chill," Ichiru waved a dismissing, equally as fabulous hand at them, as though to brush away all their concerns. "You can still stay here, and the grocery shopping has been done. I trust you. No problem? No problem."

"What do you mean no prob-?!"

"Shh. No words, brother. No words."

"But-"

"No words now."

"Well, I guess you're right." Zero said with a sigh, pulling out the credit card he had been fingering in his pocket and looked at it lovingly. This little piece of plastic in his palm right now was his life line and he thanked god Ichiru hadn't shown any signs of wanting it back for his leave yet. "At least I have this."

"Oh right, you do." Ichiru stalked over to his twin and snatched the card from his fingers. "Forgot about that. I'll be taking this with me, if you don't mind."

"What-"

"Bye, lovelies!"

And he was gone.

...

"I suppose we'll need a job again, don't we?"

"Yes, Kaname, we do."

"And I don't suppose you would-"

"I'm not stripping."

If he hadn't known better, Zero might've pointed out the fact that Kaname suddenly sounded disappointed. "Have any ideas then?"

He didn't. Zero suddenly felt a strong sense of longing for the credit card he'd grown so attached to. They were broke once again and he already began to miss the feeling smooth, shiny plastic in his pocket.

Wait a minute.

His pocket. He had something important in there. Hastily, Zero dug through his pockets, while taking note of how deep they were for some unknown reason, and was able to fish out two paperclips, a box of blood tablets, his wallet, a pack of gum-for any situation where he'd need to Excel-erate his breath, and of course, the crumpled business card he only received a day ago. The latter was the important thing! Well, not the card, but what was written on it. His eyes lit up with opportunity as he held it with almost shaking hands.

Kaname peered curiously over Zero's shoulder at the slip of paper, and noticed the numbers messily scratched onto it. Before he could make an inquiry about it, however, Zero had already produced a phone out of thin air and begun dialing as though his life depended on it.

Somewhere a phone rang. Once. Twice.

"Hello? What, who is this? What do you want?"

Zero grimaced at the muffled voice coming from the receiving end. Kaito was slurring and he could make out the sounds of men shouting and various objects being either dropped or thrown across the room in the background. Where the hell was Kaito, at a bar? Hah. On a mission? Being responsible? As if. The bastard was probably drunk out of his mind. Zero rolled his eyes and tried not to make his exasperated sigh too obvious trough the phone. "Kaito? It's me. I was wondering if-"

"Dammit, for the last time, Ichiru, will you stop calling me?! I don't want to have sex with you-" Kaito stopped mid-sentence to hiccup and start hacking his lungs out from choking on his own saliva. "-and it's never going to work out between us!"

What the actual fuck.

"It's Zero."

A long, painful silence passed between them. If it weren't for Kaito's incessant coughing over the line, Zero would've thought he'd been hung up on.

"Well, then." Kaito finally said, his voice suddenly becoming more stable as the sound of his coughing died down. He cleared his throat and seemed to be loosening his collar nervously, from what Zero can tell by the rustling of clothing. "This conversation has become sufficiently awkward. Have I ever told you how similar you two sound?"

"We're twins." Zero deadpanned.

"Is there a second phone set around here?" Kaname rummaged through the house like a starved animal looking for bacon, searching for another phone, which he really should be having an easier time finding but wasn't. He was itching to have in on the conversation.

"There should be one in the kitchen!" Zero shouted back. "You know what, Kaito, I'm just going to be nice this time and just not ask."

"Good call. What do you want? Chose to take up my offer?"

"For a price."

"I can't find it!" Kaname shouted from the kitchen, throwing open cupboards and drawers and inspecting the rows of freshly placed soups cans and cutlery suspiciously.

"Why are you looking in the cupboards?! Check the goddamn counter!"

Kaito took a long pause. He muttered something along the lines of 'I knew it' and could be heard taking another swig of whatever alcohol it was he was drinking, proving he wasn't anywhere near finishing drowning all his sorrows for the night. "Alright, fine. Name your price. How many blowjobs-"

"What was that I heard about blowjobs?"

"None of your hooker business! Get off the line!"

'Oh for god's sake...'Kaname listened in with a smug smirk plastered on his face, finally able to plug in the phone in Ichiru's kitchen, and Zero hadn't repressed the urged to groan aloud. "Ew, no. No blo-none of that. I just want half your paycheck."

Kaito sounded like he was throwing up.

"Okay, forty percent then. Give me the details."

The sound of Kaito heaving in the background ceased and he cleared his throat of bile dramatically. Finally taking their conversation a little more seriously, he spoke slowly and steadily, and Zero swore his voice dropped three octaves. "Now, I really shouldn't be telling you this before we meet in person, but since I know it'll interest you...my target is a pureblood vampire."

Zero whistled. "Shit, who was the idiot who decided to put you in charge of a job like this?"

"Are you doubting me? Are you actually doubting me?"

"I always doubt you."

"Well fuck you, Zero!" Kaito snapped, his voice suddenly three octaves back up. He quickly cleared his throat again upon realizing his blunder, and returned to baritone.

"There's been reports of some kind of infected blood tablets going around, and apparently they're being fed to humans in and around the club scene. It causes them to become increasingly strong-and fast-sometimes violent, even like a Level E in behaviour. But still with a considerable amount of their sanity intact. At least for now."

Zero and Kaname shot each other a skeptical glance. "I think those are called steroids, Kaito."

"Totally not the same thing, man. Because vampires. Vampires make it different. You don't even know."

Zero rolled his eyes. Perhaps it was the best to at least humour him. "Okay, so someone's roofied a bunch of humans and made them go batshit insane by OD-ing on vampire steroids. How are you so sure it's a pureblood?"

"Only a pureblood's... well, blood is strong enough to influence behaviour that way." Kaito explained as-a-matter-of-factly, showing no sign of quitting his 'serious baritone' getup. "Any other level vampire's blood just doesn't have the right properties to change someone like that, especially indirectly like in blood tablets."

"He's right." Kaname added. "And even noble vampires wouldn't have any motivation to do this, since, unless under extremely special circumstances, a pureblood's will can overrule their attempts to gain dominance through a level E army. So any nobles or lower level vampires involved are probably also under the influence of he pureblood."

Then he continued as an afterthought, "And for anyone who hasn't caught on yet, purebloods are always responsible for drama. It's like we're all bored or something."

Zero snickered in agreement. "What do you have to say for yourself then, Kaname?"

"I still have the right to remain silent."

"Woah there. First name basis?"Kaito, despite being drunk, still managed to catch Zero's slip of tongue, though his comment was ignored.

"So it's a pureblood. Why did the association send you on this mission alone?"

"Are you doubting me again, or are you just worried?"

"Well I'm certainly not worried."

"Aw, don't be shy, Zero. Senpai has noticed you."

"Fuck you, Kaito."

"I told you I don't get propositioned for sex by hookers."

"Wait, what-"

"I was able to get some samples of the infected blood tablets from one of the regular junkies, but haven't been able to trace them back to a source yet. If you want, you and Kuran can stop by my place tomorrow and see what you can figure out. I'll send you an address later and-"

"Sure. Go home, Kaito. You're drunk."

Kaito was hung up on. The line went dead, and Zero damn near broke the phone once it did. Though, upon realizing the fact that it didn't belong to him and he'd most definitely have to pay for it later, he decided it was probably best not to.

The following morning, Zero and an increasingly sleep deprived Kaname, found themselves by Kaito's front door, which Kaname noted was a hideous shade of plum purple and did not at all match the wallpaper and spent a good seven minutes refusing to enter unless someone adjusted the colour scheme. Hearing the commotion outside his apartment, Kaito, who was thankfully sober this time, swung the door open and stared incredulously at the duo in front of him.

"Why the hell did you bring him?" He asked, quirking an eyebrow at Kaname, who wasn't completely done criticizing the decorating job. "And are you mockingthe colour of my door?"

"You-!"Kaname's eyes widened in a sudden recognition that Zero didn't quite understand. "Well, you're certainly no Martha Stewart, I'll say." He spat, jerking his nose up towards the sky.

"There's no need to insult me for me for the colours I didn't choose." Kaito retorted, looking very ready to inflict bodily harm on the offending vampire in front of him. His chainsaw was in the supply closest no more than two feet away from him. And he was sure no one overseas would notice if a certain pureblood went missing one day. "It's pretty unethical to discriminate against people for their decorating skills, I should mention."

"Says the guy who's probably guilty of countless Van Helsing hate crimes."

"Well, excuse me for hating on gross as all fuck humanoid abominations that chew on people's limbs and feed on their bodily fluids. No offense, Zero."

"None taken." Zero replied not without sarcasm.

"Oh, no. Terribly sorry." Kaname continued in a much similar vein. "I suppose you're right after all. It isn't the colour choice, although still nauseating, that disgusts me. It's your presence."

"That's it. You've done it. I've had enough shit from you."

Before Kaito could lunge through the doorway and unleash a can of top-ten-hunter of the association kickass on Kaname, Zero casually pulled the pureblood out of the line of attack and indirectly placed himself between the two bickering males before flicking Kaito in the forehead. "Pardon me for intruding, but don't you think we have more important things to deal with? And I don't suppose either of you need an introduction... seeing as how you're such good friends already.

"There's no need." Kaito seconded, running a hand through his hair with an annoyed sigh so that it would look the way it was before he got so worked up over what the pureblood thought about the colour of his door. "The association had me friend all the purebloods on Facebook under the guise of a regular human to help me with the mission. All the photos of food and cam-whoring aside, do you not realize the irony behind a pureblood saying YOLO?"

"I don't have multiple lives, you twat." Kaname protested, absolutely baffled by the less favourable hunter who had made such outrages assumptions about the nature of his lifespan and his lifestyle. He could say it was borderline racism! "Just an extremely long, continuous one. Except for when magic or resurrection is involved, then I can come back from the dead because technically my body doesn't decompose and-"

"I'm unfriending you on Facebook."

"Unfriend me! I couldn't possibly care less."

"We are never playing FarmVille together agai-"

"Can you both do me a favour and shut the fuck up?"

"Oh, right. Of course." Kaito stepped back inside and held the hideous plum purple door wide for his 'guests'.

"Thanks." Zero said, dragging an absolutely livid Kaname behind him, who was swearing to "Pimp My Door" the hell out of Kaito's apartment. The two were ushered in and awkwardly tried to share the armchair, built for one person of course, that they were gestured to. Zero settled on sitting on the armrest and stared across the living room at Kaito, who was in front of them all by himself on a sofa meant for three.

"What the fuck, man."

"You like?" Kaito purred, stroking the arm of the upholstered seat as though it were his lover. "Real leather. Just bought her last week and carried her up here myself. This baby smells like a freshly slaughtered cow and I am not letting you touch her."

Zero made a disgusted face at the description. "Okay. Gross."

"Well, this chair isn't that bad after all. You can always just sit-"

"I am not sitting on your lap, Kuran."

"That's okay."

"So, where are those blood tablets you wanted us to take a look at?" Zero asked, mildly disturbed and quickly wanting to change the topic to something he was more comfortable with. The prospect of slaughtered cows and sitting on Kaname's lap or vice versa was not very pleasant.

"Yeah. Just one sec." Kaito disappeared into his darkened room, and upon peering through the door which was ajar, Zero could see that it was lit only by lamps and the walls were covered in various Polaroid photographs and newspaper clippings all connected by a series of web-like, red strings. Spooky.

Kaito emerged from the room a moment later, slamming the door shut with suspicious haste, and returned to his precious couch with a small, black box which he kept in a plastic bag in his hand. It looked almost identical to the boxes of blood tablets they were supplied with at the academy, the only difference being its lack of a label, as it did not adorn the standard Cross Academy crest. "Well, this is it. Knock yourself out."

Kaname held out his hand for the box, only to have it withdrawn from him. "Why-"

"Hey," Kaito warned, holding the box of reach like a mother to her young child who attempted to eat glue. "Nobody said I have to trust you with this. Leave this kind of job to the hunters. We do this well. So don't stick your grimy mitts where they don't belong."

Zero sighed for what he felt like the umpteenth time that day. "Kaito, for crying out loud. It's fine. Just let him-"

"No way, Zero. There's no fucking way I'm letting a vampire get in the way of our mission."

"But it takes a pureblood to know a pureblood." Zero countered.

"That's exactly why in opposing this idea entirely. Who's to say he won't face-heel-turn on us? He's a hooker after all."

"Excuse me. But we Kurans are classy as hell." Feeling insulted for both himself and his lineage, Kaname tore the pack from Kaito's grasp and more or less stuck his face it in, taking a long drag of the contents. He stayed that way for a good half-minute. "What is this? Smells like piss."

Kaito raised an eyebrow, arms crossed, at the pureblood currently trying to do what he could only describe as inhaling the box of pills. A look of repulsion crossed his features briefly. He didn't exactly find the tablets in the most sanitary of places. All this time he was reluctant to even open the box, and did so as little as possible, yet that Kuran already has it stuffed in his face. "Careful there, Kuran. You might accidentally snort one of them."

"Here, give me a minute!" Momentarily forgetting how offended he was by Kaito's comment earlier, Zero shook the box out of Kaname's hands hastily, almost dropping some of the pills as they spilled out of the still open lid, in order to get a whiff of it himself. His sense of smell of wasn't as strong as a pureblood like Kaname, but the scent-or rather odour-was very much detectable. Further shoving his snout into the box, much to Kaito's disgust, he could tell apart a few distinct things: cheap liquor, sweat... And fluids of the unmentionable sort, which were much too familiar to his sensitive nose.

Wait. Hadn't he...? No. It couldn't be.

"You don't mean..." Zero's eyes widened beyond their capacity for a split second, and he nearly dropped the damn box. "There's no fucking way."

"What it is? Let me see!" Not willing to be kept in the dark from whatever it was Zero had realized, Kaname pulled back the blood tablets and inhaled it once more.

"Oh for god's sake." Kaito let out an aggravated sigh and pinched the bridge of his nose with a little more force than necessary. "Can you guys stop doing that?" When he looked back up at the other two with him, however, he realized the vampires in his apartment were both apparently in a comatose state from sheer shock.

"What the hell? What is it now?!"

"Where..." Zero started, very slowly, not quite seeming like he had truly awoken from his sudden stupor. "...did you find these?"

Kaito blinked. "I don't know. In the back alley of some sketchy club called 'Acid Neon Pink Rose' or some shit like that. Couldn't get fingerprints off it or anything. The blood I've extracted from the tablets doesn't match any of the DNA files of any purebloods we have in the database, either. But it's definitely strong stuff. Why? What'd you find?"

Zero and Kaname looked at each other with a nervous glance, and then turned back to Kaito, both very obviously uneasy and distressed with the new revelation that they hadn't told him. "We... It seems like the culprit probably wasn't expecting other vampires to be on the case. Didn't bother hiding the scent or anything." Zero said, treating the subject a lot more delicately than Kaito was comfortable with.

"Now, don't get the wrong idea," Kaname began carefully. "But the scent is very familiar. We've most likely been in the place it came from to be able to recognize it so strongly."

"Will you two fucking spit it out already?! You know where it came from, don't you?"

"The Bunny Palace."

At that point then, both Kaname and Zero knew they were utterly and completely screwed into next week.

ELSEWHERE

A few dozen people, both male and female and all dressed minimally as though they only had one outfit and had to share, were gathered around a long dining table, drinks in hand and suspicious pills abound. They giggled and slurred, drunk and high out of their minds, as they feasted and chattered amongst themselves. A man was sitting at the end of the table on an embellished throne, an ostentatious display of his status and power.

His dark plum locks against his pale white skin glowed in the darkened room. He was handsome, but in an undeniably monstrous way. His eyes flashed, like amethysts in the night sky, as his lips pulled back in a crude grin.

He shot a glance at the one beside him, a silver-haired young man adorning a mask who was also his right hand man, and immediately the other chimed a fork against his wine glass to silence the crowd. Now with his acquaintances' full attention-or as much attention as he could get from them while they were completely stoned, Romero's voice reverberated through the dining hall like a hot knife to butter.

"So, I bet you're all wondering why I've gathered you here today..."

TBC