Disclaimer: Do I really look like I'm richer than the Queen? I didn't think so.

The grass is green. Bright green. Almost the colour of his Slytherin scarf but not quite. Just a little lighter. And more… alive. He's almost afraid to sit down because he doesn't want to kill it. Which is ironic because in his line of work (if it can even be called work) murder should have become as familiar a task as brushing his teeth. But the green colour of the grass makes him hope. Hope for something better, for an escape, or if all else fails, for his wretched existence to end.

He knows he's destined for the latter. No one can save him now. He's made his choice and even if he doesn't like it, it's burned into his left forearm and he'll carry it around till the day he dies. But even if he's damned he's still free to dream. The one thing the Dark Mark hasn't taken away from him is his ability and to dream. So he wishes that one day he'll be able to take back the choices he's made and break free of the shackles that hold him in place.

He dreams that one day he'll be free. Deep down he knows that these dreams won't help him but they give him the spark of hope that he needs to stay alive. Without that spark he'll become as silent and obedient as his father. Never wondering if what he's doing is right or if it's wrong. He doesn't want to be a robot like his father. He'd rather know that what he was doing was wrong and suffer with the burden of that knowledge than live peacefully thinking what he was doing was right.

Maybe his regret will save him. Because he regrets it all. Everything he's ever done he now regrets. It was all wrong. His entire existence has been a lie. But from now on it won't be. He'll erase the lie the same way McGonagall vanished that Ferret in 5th year Transfiguration. Even if he doesn't live to see the end of the war at least he'll know his entire life wasn't a lie. Even if it's only for a few months or days or even moments.

The clouds are gathering overhead now and the bright green of the grass is fading. It'll begin to rain soon, most likely a torrential downpour because it hasn't rained in weeks but he's still standing outside surrounded by nothing but the withered trees and plants that were hardy enough to survive the harsh winter. He'll probably remain standing for hours because it's his escape from it all. While others fight, and sacrifice their lives he'll stand here in the green grass trying to escape from it all because he can't take back the choices he's made.

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