How far would you go to get the one you wanted into bed? Would you maybe do something a little disgusting...? Lol, so this is a little one shot. Nothing fancy, just hoping to bring a laugh to some people out there. Felt a little goofy today for some reason, the Mt. Dew so early in the morning could be to blame! Who knows, I hope you enjoy. ^_^

I don't own Mai Hime or the characters.... But I wish I did; there would be a lot more fluff.

----

"Perhaps she's just not ready.." Shizuru tapped her chin, lost in her thoughts which seemed to be a normal thing as of late. She and Natsuki had been together for almost two months now. That change in events had happened after the fall festival. Shizuru had been unable to hold herself back any longer and laid on the line just how she really felt about Natsuki. To her surprise the dark haired Hime smiled and confessed she'd felt the same way for quite a while. They'd left the festival hand in hand that evening, much to the delight of their friends.

However now things seemed to be at a stand still as far as the relationship went. Everything had been going exceptionally well with Natsuki but the tawny haired Hime found quickly that she wanted a little more... Apparently more than her beloved was willing to give.

Shizuru sighed and rubbed her temples. It was no surprise why she would be frustrated. She had waited so long to be with Natsuki and now that she had her it seemed she would still be forbidden to have some things.

Her brows knitted together as memories of the last encounter flooded her mind. Two nights ago she and Natsuki found themselves in a rather compromising position on the couch. They were feverishly feasting on one another's mouths and necks, hands roamed freely over clothed bodies. The tawny haired Hime had tried to unfasten Natsuki's belt when her hands were quickly smacked away and Natsuki stopped the little make out session all together. When she questioned the blue haired Hime about it Natsuki simply replied she wasn't rested enough to go any further.

That excuse had been lame. There was no other way Shizuru could view it. Natsuki had huffed and turned on the television, not planning on discussing the matter any further. Shizuru had been a little put off by the entire ordeal but said nothing, she just let it go. However now as she sat alone in the Student Council room her mind wandered over the possible reasons why Natsuki didn't want to graduate to the next level in their relationship. Perhaps her Natsuki just wasn't interested in that sort of thing? "What type of relationship is that?" Shizuru asked herself with a sigh.

It seemed her little pup was going to put up a fight for whatever reason. Maybe she just needed a harder push in the right direction. A sudden smile crossed Shizuru's lips and she sat up a little straighter, taking a long sip from the tea cup in front of her. A plan had just hatched in her sinister brain that would take Natsuki by complete surprise and make it utterly impossible for Shizuru to be denied... One could almost hear the cackling inside of her head.

--

"Ah Damnit!" Natsuki yelled as she jerked her hand away from the engine and inspected her bleeding finger. That must have been the sixteenth time today she'd snagged her skin on the rough exterior. Emerald eyes surveyed the bike in front of her while curious eyes behind Natsuki watched with a grin.

"You know... You shouldn't roughen up your hands too much. Kaichou will be upset if you can't play with her!" Mai had a grin that could light up the entire campus. Natsuki scowled and spun around, standing to face her carrot top friend. Mai merely laughed and stuck out her tongue. Teasing Natsuki had been a favorite past time.

The look that overcame her friend's face now though stopped Mai's laughter. "Okay... Sorry, I didn't mean to tease." She said as she rubbed the back of her head. Natsuki sighed and dropped her tools into the box by her side.

"It's fine." The blue haired girl stated flatly. "You should be more tactful, isn't that what you keep telling me?"

Mai pursed her lips and shrugged. "I didn't know that would be such a sensitive subject!"

Natsuki flipped her hair as she turned away from Mai and continued working on her bike. Something had clogged up the intake and she'd spent the better part of the last hour working on fixing it.

"Um... So why exactly is it a sore issue?" The carrot top asked quizzically, fully interested in hearing what was sure to be a good story since it would involve the 'not always so bright' girl in front of her.

Natsuki sighed again and did her best to ignore the questions coming from her so called friend. Mai seriously had a way of bugging her unlike anyone else but for some reason she still liked her company. She'd thought that odd...

Mai twitched her nose while leaning down. A finger is jabbed into Natsuki's side causing her to jump and knock her tool box over. As tools scattered everywhere the blue haired girl spewed a line of obscenities that caused the carrot top to blush deeply. She'd never heard that much foul language come from her friend before. There was only one explanation - This was serious. "Okay, Blue... Spill it." Mai demanded.

"Why do you have to bother me all of the time?" Natsuki turned, questioning her friend with raised brows. Mai chuckled and shook her head, ignoring the question. She would stand her ground until she was told what was going on, Natsuki should have known that already. It seemed she had a clue to that though because she had a frown etched on her features.

With a huff Natsuki straddled her bike, grabbing the handle bars emphatically. "I haven't done anything... Like that.. With her." She admitted with her eyes adverted to the ground below. It seemed that gravel was awfully interesting, at least at the moment more interesting than seeing how her friend was going to react to such news. Her initial thought was that Mai was surely going to laugh her self to death but when that reaction never came she finally looked up. Rather than humor in the other girl's eyes she saw understanding.

"You're worked up over that?" Mai finally asked, placing her hands on her hips as she stared the blue haired girl down. "I haven't even done anything with Tate... Nothing more than kissing anyway." She admitted.

Natsuki stared in disbelief at her friend. She was sure her and Tate were more or less rabid dogs when left alone... Then again they never had much alone time thanks to Mikoto always being around but still. Mai raised a brow to her friend's silent contemplation of that statement. "Come on! Surely you didn't think I was just so easy!" She yelled fists in the air.

The blue haired Hime smirked at her friend's outburst. How like Mai to so easily get offended by her silence to such comments. "Calm down." Natsuki said while waving the girl off. "I didn't say anything like that, geeze. It's just; well I figured the two of you would have... I dunno!" It was very clear that she was getting a little frustrated. "Anyway, it's not like I haven't thought about it. I mean I want to. It's just..."

Natsuki sighed and tugged her hair lightly, dropping her head against those handle bars. "When she touches me I always want more but something stops me from letting her go further. I know it frustrates her cause it sure as hell frustrates me!"

Mai sighed at her friend's uneasiness and patted her gently on the back. "Have you talked to her about this little problem?" She asked, brows raised.

"I wanted to but all I managed to say was something lame about being too tired to continue on further than making out." Natsuki rolled her eyes despite Mai not being able to see. It had been such a lame excuse! After she'd uttered it she could see the instant disbelief in Shizuru's eyes but what did she do? Like an idiot she'd just turned on the television and let the conversation die.

The carrot top couldn't help her self, she chuckled. Natsuki's head jerked up, she was scowling deeply but that only made Mai laugh harder. It seemed Natsuki was doomed to be ridiculed. "You know Natsuki; you can't just make her wait forever. A woman like Shizuru... With as many fan girls as she has around her. I'd be worried if she wasn't able to get it from you she might wander elsewhere." Mai tapped her cheek as she looked off into the distance.

"What!?" Natsuki bellowed, her voice reverberating in the nearby distance. She was off of her bike in an instant, her eyes widened with shock. "She'd wouldn't!"

"She might if you put her off long enough..." Mai continued, daring to push the blue haired girl just a little further. "I mean I don't have to worry about that because no one wants Tate but me... But Kaichou is something else all together."

At some point Natsuki's face had turned a brilliant shade of red and if one looked hard enough smoke was pouring from her ears. This realization Mai had dropped on her head struck a chord deep inside, that was more than obvious. Without another word the blue haired girl tugged on her helmet and started her bike up. It roared to life without hesitation, fixed or not fixed, that would have to wait. She sped off with Mai standing in the background waving with a grin. "No thanks needed, Kaichou." She muttered while the bike faded to nothing more than a speck on the horizon.

--

"Ara... Am I really going this far?" The tawny haired Hime asked herself while another empty bottle slammed into the bottom of the trash can. Several bowls lined the kitchen counter, along with some plastic spoons. For the better part of an hour now she had been to the store and returned to work on her latest scheme to get Natsuki into bed once and for all. There was a strange smell in the air... One that caused even Shizuru to turn her nose up in disgust.

Several bottles are gathered into her arms and scattered throughout the living room and with each bottle there was a bowl beside it and a spoon. Shizuru returned to the kitchen to retrieve a couple more bowls and then... Were those.. Paint brushes? Yes, she'd saw those and simply beamed at how very handy they would turn out to be. Her mind had wandered several times into the gutter but she'd managed to stay on track with her evil little plan.

The time was checked; she had at least forty for minutes before Natsuki said she would be home. A look of pure glee spread over Shizuru's face as she went into the bathroom for a quick shower... So much to do, so little time! The shower had been pleasant enough but now the tawny haired Hime had to set into motion the last part of her plan. The sheer look of disgust etched onto her face would suggest this part was something she wasn't looking forward to at all.

With a cringe she grabbed one of the spoons and took a seat on the plastic sheeting she'd placed along the floor. There's a loud *PLOP* sound followed by a groan from Shizuru, more or less from her stomach though. "Oh Natsuki... I hope you know how much I truly love you." She muttered while she spread something gooey along the inside of her thigh.

--

"She wouldn't! Mai is just crazy... Stupid carrot top always wants to get me worked up over nothing." Natsuki hissed into her helmet as she sped along the roadway, cutting corners like a pro. A quick turn later and she's parked in front of her apartment... Seething up toward the door that was hers. She knew Shizuru was up there, they'd agreed to have a little date night. As Natsuki took to the stairs the railing was gripped tightly in her hand, she needed to clear her head a little. There was no way Shizuru would forgive her if she ran up to the room and began yelling about fan girls and her lovers soon to be infidelity.

She leaned against the rail and pushed out a sigh while running a hand through her long hair. This was ridiculous. Shizuru loved her, and she loved Shizuru. There would never be a chance for cheating on either of their parts because one thing was certain... Their hearts belonged only to each other. A slow smile spread across Natsuki's lips at her own reassurance and she began up those stairs ready to face her love. Today she would explain her hesitations to Shizuru and together they could figure out how to handle it.

"Shizuru, I'm home..." Natsuki called after she unlocked the door and began to push it open. The leather jacket that hugged her form was shrugged off and hung on the door hanger as the door was closed quietly. "Hello?" The blue haired Hime called out again before she turned around... And her jaw hit the floor. Those emerald eyes nearly bugged right out of her head and her heart began to thud so quickly she feared a heart attack was soon to follow. "Ho... Ho... Holy shit!" She stammered out as her back hit the door and she slid slowly down it into a crouch.

In front of her in the center of the living room Shizuru was laid out in a very compromising position on her stomach, legs spread and up in the air kicking slightly. The most intriguing part however was that she was naked... Save for a thin application of a new clothing style. Her chin rested on her hands and she wore a broad grin on those plump, red lips. "Ara... Does Natsuki like my new clothes?" She cooed, swiping her tongue across her lips seductively.

Natsuki couldn't speak, she could barely even register what was lying in front of her let alone form any type of conclusion on whether she liked it or not. She swallowed but quickly found her mouth and even down into her throat was suddenly bone dry. On the plastic sheeting Shizuru now wore a slight pout.

"My Natsuki doesn't approve.." She said in a whisper, her brows knitted together. The pout killed Natsuki... And she instantly pulled herself off of the door and crawled over closer to the woman lying down. Her mouth was still too incredibly dry to formulate any type of reply though she feared if she remained silent much longer Shizuru would get the wrong idea. Rather than try to squeak out some sort of retort about how she LOVED what was in front of her, she scrambled the rest of the way over to Shizuru and pressed their lips together in a searing kiss.

Shizuru moaned softly against her lovers lips and tugged her closer, trying to strip her out of those biker leathers quickly before Natsuki's brain came back to life. "Sh... Shizuru..." Natsuki finally stammered causing the tawny haired Hime's face to fall slightly. Here came the inevitable shut down she'd become so very used to. Crimson lifted to meet emerald and widened slightly. There was a look of primal lust that had overtaken her lover's face and it caused Shizuru's breath to hitch.

"You look delicious...." Natsuki said as she licked her lips and rolled Shizuru onto her back, mounting her with ease so she could not get away. Without any more hesitation she reached under her own shirt and tugged it up and over her head, tossing it aside. Their bodies are pressed together in sticky delight, both of them groaning from the feel. Whatever had been holding Natsuki back before seemed to be gone as her lips blazed a trail down Shizuru's naked body, claiming every inch of her. Shizuru arched her back, spreading her thighs a bit more as Natsuki began to lap away the gooey substance from her thighs. Natsuki shivered from the taste of Shizuru mixed with her favorite treat, it was more than intoxicating, it was... Addicting. "You are in so much trouble." Natsuki said with a low growl that caused goose bumps to break out across Shizuru's flesh. It was going to be quite an interesting evening!

--

"Are you sure we should bother helping her? I mean... She's about as bright as a ten watt light bulb when it comes to this sort of stuff. I highly doubt she'll even retain anything we tell her." Nao trudged along side of Mia and Aoi, her shoulders slumped. It was clear going to see Natsuki was the very last thing she'd wanted to do today.

Mai smiled while working her way up the stairs. "Come on Nao, a friend in need..." She didn't bother to finish the sentence seeing as how Nao had thrown a hand into her face to silence her. Aoi was trailing behind the other two holding a bottle that looked to be labeled alcoholic. It seemed the trio had the brilliant idea of surprising Natsuki and easing her mind about the troubles she'd been having with the Kaichou. Such good friends.

Once up the stairs the trio stopped in front of the door labeled 112 and tilted their heads. There seemed to be a lot of commotion coming from inside of the apartment. Nao and Aoi looked to Mai with their brows raised questioningly. The carrot top pursed her lips and grabbed onto the door handle, jerking it open. "Natsuki we've come to!" Mai's voice cracked and her eyes widened. All three girls screamed and scrambled out of the apartment, slamming the door behind them.

Inside Natsuki sat up on her knees, a ring of white around her mouth. "What the..." She murmured with a dreamy look on her face, but she wouldn't be allowed to investigate. A hand lifted and latched onto the back of her head, shoving her back down to continue what she'd previously been doing so very well. There were those moans again!

Outside Nao, Mai and Aoi leaned heavily against the stair railing, hands over their hearts. Each girl was breathing so hard it looked as if one by one they would fall out!

Nao looked over to Mai in utter disbelief. "Was that..." She began but was cut off.

"That was Kaichou..." Mai replied, her voice strained.

"Was she...?" Aoi tried to ask her question but her voice was a mere strangled whisper.

"Covered in mayonnaise? Yeah…" Mai replied, her cheeks burning a bright crimson red. Her head nodded once to confirm what they'd all seen with their own eyes. Shizuru had been covered in the sticky white concoction that Natsuki so craved... And was currently being devoured by what looked to be quite the eager pup.

Nao blinked slowly as a slow smile spread across her lips and she pumped her fist into the air. "You go pup!" She yelled, suddenly quite proud of the dark haired girl. Mai settled her forehead into her hand and groaned, so much for Natsuki being apprehensive!