Monologues are a funny thing to watch and listen - especially when the one who's performing doesn't know you're there…Zexion x Demyx

By the time I realized it was Zemyx Day, it was already June the TENTH! So I'm sorry it's late, but I wasn't even going to bother in the first place! That was…until I realized that I wouldn't be able to sleep until I got this over and done with.

So…I wracked my head for something and eventually came up with this; this lame-oh thing…

…Whatever.

Have at it.

Warning - Mistakes are aplenty. As I did not have enough time to edit and go through it properly.

Disclaimer - (Please insert a witty disclaimer here as I cannot think of any at this moment.)

In one hand, he held onto his mobile phone with a fierce grip and stared at the numbers that were illuminated on the screen with a nervous yet determined stare. With his thumb poised over a single button, he could easily call the object of which his thoughts were currently revolved around and easily have a conversation.

Unfortunately, he was a gutless person and he had been staring at his phone, thinking he could have a go at conversing with his 'class-mate', for hours and failed to do anything else but.

Then his room-mate decided to barge in only to recoil back at the sight of the other.

"Woah, what the fuck dude, I thought you were out or something."

"I'm not. What do you want."

Now normally, Demyx wasn't a very hostile person, but right now, his nerves were on edge and his phone was very close to being crushed into bits. But lucky for the phone, his grip strength was close to none.

His phone sighed in relief.

"Just came in to borrow some gel. I ran out."

"Oh." didn't Axel buy a new tub like two weeks ago? What a freak… "Sure, go for it."

The red head grinned as he walked over to the study table and sat himself down on the chair, "But seriously, since you haven't come out in hours, I thought you weren't home."

Demyx merely hummed as Axel twisted the top off and proceeded to scoop out a huge dollop of the product and grease it through his hair. No wonder the freak can go through a tub in less than two weeks; he practically just used a quarter of it in one go.

"You playing a game or something?" Axel asked as he ran his fingers through his hair one more time before twisting the end bits and trying to manage the rest from there without a mirror.

"No." he answered as he returned his gaze to the phone and stared at the numbers.

It would be so very easy to just push the damn button, but of course, he didn't know what to do after that.

Sure, he could try his hand at holding a conversation, but he was a total git with words at the wrong time. He could almost see himself acting like a total idiot now.

"Lotto numbers?"

"Hurk!" Demyx recoiled away from the red head, his phone away from prying green eyes; he hadn't even noticed that Axel was done with his hair and was right in his personal bubble. "No!"

"Oh?" his curious expression then slowly changed. And it was an expression Demyx wasn't usually very fond of - especially when he was in the receiving end.

"No." he repeated once more. Not to deny, but to veto whatever the hell was going through Axel's boggling mind.

"Lemme guess."

"No." he repeated again, his voice firm and demanding.

"It's got something to do with that guy, doesn't it."

He knows!!

"No." he tried again. But the moment he felt his face grow a little warmer than usual, he already knew he was losing.

Axel straightened himself up and turned his gaze to the ceiling, a thoughtful expression on his face with one finger tapping his chine. "Hmm…what was his name again? I could've sworn it rhymed with sexy."

Demyx blushed. "Axel, get out." he pointed a finger to his bedroom door for emphasis. "Take the gel with you." at this point, he would give anything for the red head to leave him to simmer in his pathetic-ness. But of course, Axel was never one to listen.

"Sexy…Sex…Seh…Seh…Zeh…"

Oh…my…god…

"Zeh…Zex…?"

Demyx felt his left eye twitch with a passion as Axel continued to list out stupid words to figure out a simple (or maybe not so simple) name.

"Zex. Zexy. Sexy Zexy."

The dirty haired blond finally smacked his forehead at his lame room-mate for giving the object of his affection a stupid nickname like that. But it seemed to sound very nice…

"I got it!" at a stroke of genius, he smacked a fist to his palm and exclaimed to Demyx, "Zexion! That's his name!"

Normally, Demyx would've retorted with a somewhat sarcastic remark, but all he could manage right now was a half-smile, half-frown. It looked very awkward, which was all-too-right with what he was feeling right now.

Then the red head started to delve into his unwanted explanation of how he figured it out, "See, the first time you mentioned him, I thought, woah, that's gay." he struck a pose here, which was very much 'gay'. "I feel sorry for the poor sap. I bet he was the object of all name-calling back in high school. Like Sexy-Zexy or Sexy-on." he laughed to himself, "Aww, the poor guy."

"Ok," he nodded ever so weakly, "Can you go now?" and leave him to mope in his misery.

"Are you gonna call him?"

"No." not as in to refuse, but as to decline further questioning; one could only tolerate so much in one day.

Axel grinned, it was a shit-eating kind of grin, it was the kind of grin that Demyx didn't like - especially when he was on the receiving end. "Need some help?"

"N--" Before he even had a chance to finish his one, simple word, his phone was out of his grip and in the red head's. "What the f--"

"There ya go." Axel tossed the phone back, grabbed the gel tub which was so kindly offered to him and sauntered out of the room. "You can thank me later." he gave a suggestive wink before he closed the door behind him to give the dirty haired blond some peace and quiet.

"Hello?"

"Hurk!" Demyx fumbled on his phone and with a quick push of the button, he hung up.

…

…

…

"SHITT!!" he screeched and belatedly realized that he just hung up on Zexion. He dropped the phone onto his bed and gripped onto his mollet with both hands as the world crashed around him.

It was some minutes later that he was eventually reduced to a puddle on the floor and he couldn't stop the groan from escaping his lips.

Thus began his character monologue;

"Why god, whyyyyy..." he writhed on the floor, hands over his face and his head thumping onto the floorboards every few seconds.

"Why is it so hard to talk to him like a normal person?" not that he was 'normal' in any way. But then again, having a room-mate around like Axel can do that to just about anyone.

"Why can't I just go--" he sat up in a cross-legged position and plastered on a wide grin and gave a wave, "Hey Zexion, it's me Demyx, we share the same class. Remember me? We did a group assignment last month. Sorry I haven't kept in contact with you. Oh, what was that? You don't remember me? Oh, too bad." then he slumped back onto the floor and proceeded to writhe around once more with his hands over his face. "Oh my god, I'm so pathetic, I don't even know where to begin.

Little did he know that Axel (with his shit-eating grin) was by the doorway recording the little dilemma that Demyx was currently going through.

Eventually, after what felt like hours when really it was just a few minutes, the dirty haired blond picked himself up from the floor and sat down with his head glued to the study table. "This sucks…"

'This is absolute gold." Axel grinned as he slinked away from the door once he recorded every second of torment that Demyx put himself through. He was so going to use this as blackmail material one day.

Demyx had been in the middle of repeatedly thumping his forehead on the table when out of the blue, his phone started to ring. "Hurk!" his momentary shock caused him to fall out of his chair in something most people would nowadays call 'epic fail'.

"Shit!!" he cringed and decided that his head had already gone through enough trauma for one day.

Slowly, with much effort, he crawled his way over to his bed and blindly groped around for his phone. When he finally got a hold of it, all he could do was gawk.

Now, we go through the second part of his character monologue;

"Shit, shit, fuck, shit." he whispered lowly, almost afraid that the phone would be able to hear every word and relay it back to the person who was calling. "He's calling me." he panicked. "Why is he calling me?"

As the phone continued to ring, continued to play its jingle, he continued on his rant. And Axel was back at the door recording his every word, "Maybe he's calling because he's wondering who called him only to hang up on him?"

Then the jingle stopped.

…

…

…

"SHITT!!!" he screeched again.

By the doorway, Axel was close to bursting his lungs from holding back his laughter.

"Oh my god!! Not only do I hang up on him, but I don't even pick up his call!"

And he goes through his extensive list of swear words and curses he learnt from various languages including Mandarin, Cantonese, Japanese, Thai, Italian, Spanish and of course, English.

Then his phone started ringing again.

And thus began another spew of curses that would make anybody's poor grandmother stir in their graves.

Eventually, all shock was drained from his system (one can only go through so much emotional trauma in one day) and he robotically picked up the call. "Hello…"

"Hello?"

"Hello…"

"…This is…Demyx, right?"

At the mention of his name, he perked up a little, "Yesh!" his eye twitched and he smacked himself on the forehead once again. 'Oh my god, that was so lame, I don't even know where to begin.'

A soft chuckle came from the other end, "You called earlier right?"

"Uhh…" he couldn't trust himself to say another word.

"Is…everything ok?"

"Fine!" he answered in a high pitched voice and smacked himself on the forehead again.

"Ok…"

Demyx didn't say anything, on the count of that he didn't know what to say, and since Demyx was the first one to call, Zexion waited for some sort of conversation to form.

But none did…

"Well, if there isn't anything you need then I'll just go--"

"Wait!" he blurted out without thinking and smacked his lips for betraying him by saying anything.

"Yes?"

"Urhhmm…" he mumbled out through his fingers and wracked his mind for some semblance of a conversation to form. Unfortunately, the one he planned to go with earlier flew right out the window.

"…?"

"…"

"…"

"…"

Sigh…

'Hurk!'

"Doyouwanttogogetsomecoffeeormaybeicecreamoradrinkormaybeacandlelitdinneronabeachwhatchamacallit?!"

"…I'm sorry, what was that?"

"Nothing!"

"…"

A high pitched noise escaped Demyx's throat but the damage was done and no matter how much he wished he could turn back time, he was no magician…

"I don't like coffee."

"Hurk!"

"It's a bit cold for ice cream."

"…" insert heart-attack here.

"If you meant alcoholic drinks then I'm going to have to decline."

"…" insert heart failure here.

"I think candle-lit dinners on a beach is a bit…generic."

"…" insert mind blank here.

"But if you have something else in mind…"

System reboot. "…What was that?"

"Do you have anything else in mind?"

"Ummm…movie?"

"There's a newly released movie with Ryan Reynolds in it that I was planning on watching."

"The Proposal?"

"How did you know I wasn't talking about X-Men?"

"Because Ryan's not the main character."

"Touché…"

"…So?"

"Are you free tomorrow?"

"Yesh--yeah, I mean, yes…Mm-hmm…"

A soft chuckle came from the other end, "Ok, I'll see you after class then?"

"Mm-hmm."

"Bye."

"Mm-hmm!"

Even after Zexion had already hung up, Demyx still had the phone up to his ear and his lips pursed together to prevent himself from saying anything more stupid. But eventually, he laid the phone very gently back on his bed and proceeded to lie on the floor like the helpless person that he was.

It was a while before his mind caught up with him and he burst into another fit of hysterics.

Thus began his third character monologue.

…And Axel's third blackmail material.

Yes, unbelievably OOC but whatever! At least I got something out right??

…Forgive my lame-ness…

...I managed to pull this out without plan and in two hours. I deserve a prize dammit!