Confessions Lead to Strange Bedfellows Chapter 1: Confessions of the Heart, a guiding light fanfic

Title: Confessions Lead to Strange Bedfellows

Author: Kimberly21570

Fandom: Guiding Light

Pairing: Olivia and Natalia

Though I'm certainly no stranger to writing fan fiction (my poison… er… passion… for the past six years has been AMC's Lena and Bianca… those poor sex-deprived souls) this is my first attempt at an Otalia fic. Anyway, this fic has been mercilessly flirting with my muse for weeks now, so I'm taking a much-needed break from writing research papers and presentations to indulge the romance junkie that lies within...

Disclaimers and Other Assorted Ramblings: I suppose I should include all the usual disclaimers – but quite frankly, I don't know 'em all. I do know that I don't own these characters… except in my sweetest dreams! If I did - I certainly wouldn't be wasting my time writing this crap - I'd find far better ways to utilize my time! *devilish grin*

Oh, and that asshat Frank would've been gone months ago… He's such a tool… I think Natalia should lock him up in her shed, so he won't keep interrupting them…

But, I digress…

Back to our girls… If I owned 'em, they would've been standing at an altar in Massachusetts or Iowa (who'da thought? – Go Iowa!) … or any of the other States that have finally emerged from the dark ages … making a real commitment, instead of playing tiddlywinks and holding hands like giddy little school girls … Sarcasm much? I think… definitely…

Seriously though, I'm truly enchanted by these characters as portrayed by Crystal and Jessica, and I hope that I can do them justice.

Anyway, the characters are owned by CBS/TeleNext and Proctor & Gamble. I'm a broke graduate student, so please don't sue me… I promise to return them, sated and smiling… and you wouldn't get much if you sued me anyway… Written for fun, not profit; romance, bickering, humor, and ultimately, sex, abound…

Rating: Chapter 1 is PG-13, but subsequent chapters will eventually reach NC-17

Summary: This story takes place during and after the conversation where Olivia is freaking out about Phillip's return. I thought opening scene spoke volumes about the depth of their connection. Though I've changed some of the phrasing, most of the dialogue in the beginning of this piece is directly from the show (no copyright infringement intended – just wanted to stay true to the initial content of the scene because it was so beautifully scripted). Some of the other scenes that I've either incorporated, or merely referenced, are out of chronological order, but they seemed like a fun backdrop or they were necessary for a point I was trying to make, so I used them. I've cut out a lot of the interruptions, and ultimately taken things in a different direction… one that I hope you all enjoy…

Confessions Lead to Strange Bedfellows

Kimberly A. Kemerer

"Deep in my heart I'm concealing things that I'm longing to say. Scared to confess what I'm feeling - frightened you'll slip away."

From the Movie Evita

Chapter 1 - Confessions of the Heart:

Olivia Spencer stood, bolted to the floor; fear and trepidation pulsing through her veins. Gone were the lighthearted laughter and free-spirited flutterings of a few moments prior, when she and her daughter Emma were making Valentines and chattering about tummies full of butterflies. She had blushed when her daughter asked if she knew "that feeling…" and she had confessed with a bashful smile that she knew it well; as she cast a sideways glance – one that lingered just a bit longer than was either necessary or safe – toward Natalia, the young woman with whom she shared both a home, and her daughter; the woman who had unwittingly stolen her heart.

In an instant, those delightful feather-like flutters had been replaced with the heaviness of boulders, sinking to the bottom of her stomach, as stark reality set in. Phillip Spaulding was back— and her little girl was in danger. Her borrowed heart pounded. Her thoughts raced, faster than her mind could translate; faster than her mouth could spew the words. Holed up in her bedroom with Natalia, she paced frantically, as she rambled, almost incoherently, about her psychotic ex-husband's penchant for kidnapping her daughter, and about Natalia taking Emma away; hiding her from her father's malevolent grasp…

And then there was something about a gun…

Natalia Rivera knew this woman well. Better, in fact, than she ever would have believed possible, given the earliest undercurrents of their rather curious acquaintance. Throughout the course of their tumultuous relationship, she had witnessed the very best… and the very worst… of Olivia Spencer. Not only had she witnessed this headstrong, passionate woman's wrath toward others, she had often been the unfortunate target herself. She had witnessed an endless torrent of unrestrained fits of rage, caustic displays of blatant contempt, and myriad infantile temper tantrums; which oftentimes included random objects being strewn about the room. Even at her weakest, when her transplanted heart threatened to fail, Olivia Spencer had proven she was a force to be reckoned with; much to Natalia's chagrin.

And sometimes, in moments when she had least expected it, Natalia had been the fortunate recipient of the most loving displays of tenderness and generosity she had ever known. She had experienced the highs and the lows; the joy and the tears; the good, the bad, and the downright ugly; the anger, the indifference, and ultimately, the love of Olivia Spencer. She thought she had witnessed every emotion imaginable… until now…

Olivia's usual response to fear, was anger. The more fearful she became, the more obdurately her temper flared; and Natalia more than expected the news of Phillip's return to evoke an absolute firestorm of unbridled rage within this volatile woman. But this— what she was witnessing in Olivia now, was nothing she would ever have expected. Nothing could have prepared her for this: The unraveling of Olivia Spencer…

Gone was the characteristically level-headed woman's ability to rationalize and strategize. She was restless and agitated, as she briefly explained her history with Phillip; the catalyst for her current level of unconcealed fear. Agitation then rapidly revolved into uncontrollable panic, as she carried on about her ex-father-in-law blasting them for their living arrangement and his concern for her daughter, and how Phillip's return was no coincidence. Then, her breathing turned ragged, as she lent voice to a conspiracy theory involving the two men and her little girl, and ultimately issued the barefaced threat to kill Phillip, if he came near her daughter again.

Strangely, the threat had induced a deep sense of empathy for Olivia, more so than fear, in Natalia. Olivia, who was always so strong and self-assured, stood before her, quaking with fear; and Natalia's heart ached for this woman who had so unwittingly become her closest friend, her trusted confidant, and so much more…

Olivia's fierce protectiveness over Emma reminded Natalia of the reasons she loved this woman so deeply. Olivia Spencer was strong, spirited, powerful, and passionate; more passionate than anyone Natalia had ever known. But behind the veil; beyond what the rest of the world could see, Olivia was gentle, giving, loyal and loving; and never was she more loving than when it came to Emma. The little girl brought out emotions and behaviors in Olivia that only Natalia had witnessed; and therein formed the foundation of Natalia's unwavering love for her.

Now Olivia was rambling, almost incoherently; rationality a forgotten notion, as she stammered and stumbled over her words.

Natalia watched, as Olivia, in a frenzy of broken thoughts and scrambled words, insisted that she needed to get Emma out of town, out of the country; then insisted that Natalia be the one to take her. When Olivia's thoughts turned to the necessity of acquiring a gun, Natalia finally snapped into action; telling her frightened friend that she was "talking crazy…"

"I don't know what to do… I don't know what to do…" Olivia fussed; anxiously pounding clenched fists against dense air, as she fought back tears.

"Olivia! Stop it!" Natalia uncharacteristically commanded; her tone sharp, and laden with worry, as she raced to her friend; gently taking tightened fists into her hands, willing them to unwind.

Olivia's hands relaxed at Natalia's touch; instinctively melting into place.

"I know you're scared, Olivia. You have every reason to be scared," Natalia quietly sympathized. She paused for a moment; dark eyes wordlessly urging Olivia to stay strong, "but you're workin' yourself up… and you're gonna get sick… and you're gonna scare your daughter," she noted; disquiet clearly etched in her tone.

Olivia closed her eyes, drew in ragged breaths and swallowed hard; attempting to stifle the fear in her heart and the accompanying torrent of tears rising within her chest, as Natalia continued, "You're too upset to make clear decisions right now. You're just … you can't think straight… So I'll do it. You're not goin' anywhere," she resolutely announced; eyebrows arched in emphasis. "You shouldn't go anywhere," she reiterated, vehemently shaking her head back and forth; eyes locked on Olivia's. Then, in hushed tones, she offered her reason, "You have me—"

The sound of those three little words: You. Have. Me., crossing Natalia's lips, was all Olivia needed to hear – the walls began to crumble, and she released the tears she had been so valiantly holding captive.

"Let me be strong… for you… Okay?" Natalia quietly encouraged; eyes transmitting strength to bolster this wounded heart. "I promise you, we are not gonna let anything happen… to your little girl. Trust me…" she quietly entreated; the tips of her fingers lightly brushing Olivia's cheek, as she reached her right hand out to brush wayward tendrils of perfectly highlighted chestnut locks from a tearstained face. Then, as her hand returned to hold Olivia's, she quietly continued, "Take a deep breath… Trust me…" she implored; nodding her head in silent reiteration of her entreaty.

Olivia sniffed back tears and nodded her head in agreement; eyes locked on Natalia's dark orbs, as if they alone held the strength to sustain her. Moments passed; comfortable silence fusing the space between them, as Olivia dropped her gaze; focusing on the gentle hands that held her own; taking careful notice of how safe and loved she felt with even the most simple of touches from her closest friend.

"Look at me," Natalia beseeched; hands never leaving their hold on Olivia's.

The hotelier woman sniffed, bit her lower lip, and shook her head in hushed defiance.

"Look in my eyes," Natalia insisted; eliciting compliance from Olivia, as she sniffed back more tears. "What do you see?"

Olivia allowed those beckoning mahogany eyes to draw her in again, and searching deeply, she quietly shared her heart. "Someone who's strong…" she sniffed, "and loyal… Someone I can count on. Someone…" her words dissipated, as subsequent tears threatened to flow.

"Say it," Natalia quietly encouraged; instinctively knowing the depths of Olivia's heart. Despite the confusion she had been experiencing as she attempted to reconcile the deepest desires of her own heart with the values with which she had been raised, she offered a silent prayer to her Maker: Please, Lord, let this be the moment, she petitioned; praying that Olivia would finally lend voice to the feelings she knew they both shared.

"I can't—" Olivia replied; shaking her head as she sniffed back the tears; certain that admitting her feelings would expose Natalia's heart to a future teeming with inner conflict and pain.

"Yes, you can," Natalia confidently reassured; hands still firmly gripping Olivia's; eyes still locked on her gaze, "you can… because I feel the same way."

"You do?" Olivia exhaled. Confused by the seeming declaration, she was hopeful that Natalia would finally admit her true feelings; yet, simultaneously fearful that she might.

"I can trust you with my life," Natalia quietly confessed, "and I hope… you feel you can do the same."

"I do… I do… and—" words dissolving into air again.

"And what?" Natalia pressed.

"And… nothing…" Olivia answered; once again quelling her own feelings in deference to Natalia's deeply-held beliefs and spiritual well-being.

Natalia nodded her head in understanding. Olivia wasn't ready. "Okay," she acquiesced. She swallowed hard to abate the growing mass of disappointment rising in her chest, cleared her throat, and returned to the issue at hand. "This whole situation with Phillip," she quietly sighed, "I just… I don't want anything to happen to you. I can't lose you, Olivia… I can't lose someone else I lo—" Stopping her confession midstream, tears began to flow.

Understanding Natalia's pain, Olivia gently squeezed the hand that held her own; then reached out with her right hand to brush away the tears from the younger woman's cheek. "I'm sorry, Natalia," she whimpered; eyes downcast.

"Sorry for wha—" Natalia attempted to inquire.

"Let me finish," Olivia interrupted; halting the inquiry with the deliberate placement of two gentle fingers across Natalia's lips. The fingers lingered there; lightly brushing those soft lips before reluctantly taking their leave.

Natalia nodded; allowing Olivia to resume. "I'm sorry Gus had to die, so that I could live," she quietly explained; whispers riddled with guilt. Then, swallowing hard to gain resolve, she continued, "He's gone now, and… no matter what I do, I can't change that. But I can promise you I'm not going anywhere," she assured; smiling softly through tear-filled eyes. "You were there for me during my darkest hours. You fought so hard to keep me alive, when all I wanted was to die. And I'm so thankful that you did," she acknowledged; genuine gratitude engraved in her tone. "I don't think I ever told you that," she shamefully recognized. "I'll never understand why… you fought so valiantly for me," she whispered through tears. "I was such a Bitch to you…"

Knowing full-well that, considering this was Olivia, her choice of language could have been significantly more objectionable, Natalia ignored the vulgarity; instead, choosing to focus on the vulnerability she found in the hotelier's deep jade eyes. "You were hurting," she replied softly.

"I was pissed off," Olivia argued; taken aback by the force of her own response.

"No— you were hurting," Natalia insisted; again ignoring the vulgarity. "Your anger was just a cover for the hurt and confusion and guilt you were feeling, because Gus was gone, and… you were alive, and… it didn't make sense to you."

"And just when the hell did you become an expert on my feelings?" Olivia barked; jerking her hands away from Natalia's, and turning to face the window. Threatened by the exposure of her deepest-held vulnerabilities, Olivia wrapped her arms around herself, forming a physical barricade around her heart.

Natalia watched her intently; instinctively allowing her time for the anger to subside, and rationality to return.

Olivia fumed; though she was decidedly more infuriated with herself than with Natalia. Vulnerability pissed her off. Truth be told, she was so pissed that she really wanted to say fuck— but still, she respected Natalia, and consciously held back in an effort to honor the younger woman's beliefs. It was during such times as this that she felt most confused— Never had she found need for an edit button in the past. She said what was on her mind, regardless of the consequences— No One stifled Olivia Spencer. Until now. Until this woman. But why this woman? She was, in no uncertain terms, the veritable embodiment of the anti-Olivia Spencer. Why now? With the exception of her daughters, Olivia had lived her entire life, never lending credence to the needs, desires, values or concerns of others. And why did being vulnerable, especially with Natalia, still threaten her at times? She sighed, and dropped her head in silent surrender.

Natalia approached her from behind; and wrapping strong, supportive arms around Olivia's waist, she rested her head against the taller woman's shoulder.

Olivia, having softened a bit after her ruminations, allowed herself to relax into Natalia's embrace. A singular question simultaneously passed through two minds: Why does this… the two of us together… holding one another… feel so safe, so right?

"Hey—" Natalia whispered; extracting Olivia from her pensive state, as she calmly coaxed her to turn around. Once Olivia was facing her again, she reached out her right hand, softly caressing the hotelier's cheek. "You're safe with me," she gently reminded.

Olivia nodded her head; reveling in the sensation of Natalia's hand on her cheek. "I know—" she quietly replied. "I'm sorry—"

"There's no need for apology," Natalia replied. "I understand how difficult it is for you to show your vulnerabilities; even with me," she whispered understandingly.

"I shouldn't be so guarded with you," Olivia answered; closing her eyes as she pressed her face against that gentle hand. "I know my heart is safe with you."

Natalia gingerly pulled Olivia into her arms; right hand planted firmly against the small of the taller woman's back; fingers of her left hand instinctively tangled in soft locks, gently caressing the back of her head, as she offered comfort. "It always has been… and it always will be…" she whispered in promise; knowing full-well that Olivia would understand the double entendre embedded in her choice of words.

"I know—" Olivia quietly acknowledged; dissolving into the warmth of Natalia's embrace, burying her face in the tangled curtain of deep brunette locks that cascaded down Natalia's neck; breathing deeply as she allowed the younger woman's tranquil demeanor to calm her. You always smell of honeysuckle and vanilla, she reveled; drawing in the sweet, familiar scent of the younger woman's skin and hair. Then, her other sensory processes taking over, she was suddenly acutely aware of the pleasant sensation of Natalia's body pressed firmly against her own. She drew in another deep breath; savoring the closeness; then, in an attempt to stave off her growing desire and impending unrest, she whispered, "You were right, you know…"

"'bout what?" Natalia queried; withdrawing from their embrace to search the hotelier's face.

"About how I was feeling when Gus died… the guilt…" she quietly admitted; tears beginning to flow again. "I just don't understand why…" she cried softly.

"Why what, Olivia?" Natalia gently pressed.

"Why you fought so hard to keep me alive…" Olivia explained; tears streaming down her face. "I didn't want to live, Natalia… didn't deserve to live…"

Natalia reached out with her right hand; tenderly wiping away the hotelier's tears. "Don't say that, Olivia," she quietly instructed; shaking her head back and forth.

"But it's true," Olivia tearfully rejoined. "Gus is the one who deserved to live… and you deserved a happy ending with him…"

Tears welling up in dark eyes, Natalia wordlessly searched Olivia's face, as a myriad of conflicting thoughts and emotions ransacked her mind. She loved Gus; had loved him all her life, and still missed him at times – especially when she considered Rafe, and all he that he had missed with his father. But she was no longer lonely for him— didn't long for his touch anymore. No— Somewhere along the line that had changed, and someone new now inhabited that place in her heart— it was someone else's touch for which she yearned day and night; someone else's whispers she longed to hear. Someone named Olivia Spencer. The notion simultaneously confused, and comforted her; frightened, and excited her… each new impulse triggering a corresponding expression to blanket her delicate features.

Olivia studied the younger woman intently; wondering at the underlying thoughts that caused her facial expressions to so rapidly change. "Natalia?" she quietly called; not wanting to startle her.

"Huh?" Natalia absentmindedly responded; shaking her head as she emerged from her trance-like state.

"Are you okay?" Olivia inquired; concern etched in her soft tone.

"Oh… Yes, I'm fine…" she fibbed. "Just… lost in thought for a moment…"

"Care to share?" Olivia invited; longing to be there for Natalia, just as the younger woman had always been for her.

"I think I just needed a moment to process things," Natalia responded; telling a half-truth. She swallowed hard, and drew in a deep breath; gathering courage. "Here's the thing…" she began; a deep sigh escaping her lips, "I loved Gus… I always will," she declared. "But… he's gone now, Olivia… and no amount of prayers or faith will ever bring him back. He's gone… forever, but… you're here with me… And I wouldn't trade the life we share…" she paused; voice pierced with tears; "for anything…"

"Well who says you have to trade it?" Olivia asked rhetorically; bending her knees slightly to reach eye level with the shorter woman as she cupped a tearstained face between tender hands; gently caressing her cheeks.

Searching dark eyes that stared into hers, Olivia's resolve cracked a tiny bit more, as her heart swelled with tender affection for this priceless treasure of a woman. "I promised you… I'm not going anywhere," she firmly reassured; emphasizing her words with a firm shake of her head. "As much as I wanted to die when this all began… I want to live even more… now that I have you in my life. I— I've never—" she stammered, "had anything like this before… Never known anyone as decent and kind and warm… and beautiful… as you— God, you're beautiful, Natalia," she exhaled; her breath like a whispered prayer; thoughts momentarily diverted by the sundry wave of unabashed adoration and desire that unexpectedly washed over her, "beautiful… inside and out… and I've never—"

Her throat ran dry, like an antiquated spring during a drought; rendering her unable to speak as her mind raced to reconcile conflicting emotions. Never had these two emotional states collided within her before. She adored her daughters… and yes, she had desired men; though certainly none recently… but never had she experienced the merging of the two… until now. Until Natalia.

Two sets of eyes locked, each searching the other, and without a moment's thought, Natalia moved in; placing her hands on Olivia's hips as she closed the already minuscule space between them. "You've never… what, Olivia?" she gently prodded.

Acutely aware of their close proximity, and of Natalia's hands planted firmly on her hips, Olivia swallowed hard; her throat like sandpaper, as the sweet tension between them reached an as-yet unparalleled peak. "I've always defined myself by my ability to conquer men…" she began; taking the long way around the issue, "by being desirable to men. And— I liked having that power over them… I still do," she admitted candidly.

She dropped Natalia's gaze for a moment; breathing deeply to regain her composure before locking eyes with the younger woman again, and continuing, "But now I have these feelings… that I've never had before…" she confessed; eyes widening, as a nervous laugh escaped her burning lungs. "Feelings that I don't know what to do with… I just… I don't know who I am anymore, Natalia," she admitted; sounding as though she was about to cry again, as she dropped her head; chestnut curls cascading across her face.

Natalia allowed her the moment, as she studied her carefully; noting the softness of the rose-tinted blouse the hotelier was wearing— how it brought out the natural hues in her silken skin; how it caressed her body in all the right places, in all the right ways; then cascaded down her torso in perfect waves. In sharp contrast to the designer power suits she was accustomed to seeing Olivia wear, this attire softened her features; changed the light in her eyes from the flash of a corporate… "mongrel," as Emma had misguidedly called her… to the glow of woman who was genuinely happy and completely content in the life with which she had been blessed.

While Natalia had to admit to herself that she found the sight of Olivia, coifed in an Armani suit, jade eyes flashing as she berated an opponent or commanded compliance from her staff and colleagues, completely intoxicating, she was also intoxicated by this softer side of this woman… the side that, until these past few months, had only seemed to emerge with Emma… and now, emerged with her. A new-found appreciation swept over her as she acknowledged Olivia's ability to balance her corporate persona with the woman she was becoming. She reached out her right hand, tipping Olivia's chin. "Hey—" she whispered; capturing Olivia's attention as she gently swept back silky chestnut tendrils, before cradling the hotelier's face in her palm, "the woman you are now… is exactly the woman you are meant to be, Olivia… and I wouldn't have you any other way…"

In that moment she knew, beyond all doubt, that though still unspoken, Natalia was finally professing her love. Jade eyes darkened as tears gathered; threatening to brim over. "The fact that you would have me at all… takes my breath away…" she exhaled; knowing it was safe now, to reveal long-hidden truths. "I think about you… about us… constantly…" she quietly confessed; a single tear sliding down her cheek. "We get each other, Natalia… we click… on levels I never even knew existed… and I love that about us…" she breathed; "but… as much as I want and need what we share together… it scares the hell out of me…"

"And you think this doesn't scare me?" Natalia replied; more a statement than a question. "You are all I think about, Olivia. You… and Emma…" she whispered softly.

Pausing, Natalia attempted to quell the wave of nervous excitement rushing through her veins, as she prepared to reveal her long-denied truth. "Whenever I'm away from you, all I wanna do is just come back here. I wanna come back to our home… and just be with you…" she confessed. "You can make me so angry, Olivia… I mean, No One pushes my buttons the way you do… You make me completely crazy, Woman!" she laughed brightly through her tears; knowing how much she reveled in that Olivia-induced kind of crazy. It was intoxicating; like a fine wine; and Natalia wanted nothing more than to drown in it. "But you also make me laugh, and… you make me happy…" she admitted; voice softening. "I don't know what to do with that, Olivia…" she explained; tears streaming down her cheeks, "but I do know that I don't ever want these feelings to change…"

"Oh, thank God you understand," Olivia breathed; a deep sigh of relief escaping heavy lungs. She flashed Natalia that shy, yet irresistibly sexy smile, as she drew the younger woman closer against her body; reaching out, cradling a tearstained cheek with her right hand, she searched Natalia's dark eyes. "Somewhere between overdosing on homemade cookies… and bickering about wall hangings and Christmas decorations… I fell in love with you, Natalia," she whispered through joyful tears.

The tiny flecks of gold in Natalia's eyes shone brightly through her tears as she acknowledged Olivia's declarations. "I know you love me, Olivia…" she breathed; nodding her head to seal the admission. "I think I've known for a long time, but… I was confused, and… afraid… so I changed the subject… or picked fights with you, to avoid the conversation," she confessed; apology engraved in her tone.

"I know—" Olivia whispered; voice free of any accusation.

"Yeah—" Natalia blurted; embarrassed by her lack of maturity.

"It's okay, Natalia," Olivia reassured.

"No. It isn't," Natalia argued firmly; shaking her head in adamant disagreement. "I knew it was there between us… long before Emma's presentation, and… I fought it… because I was scared… because those kinds of feelings… can't exist in my world…"

Olivia nodded her head; signaling her understanding. "I know how much your faith means to you," she whispered, "and I can't even begin to comprehend how difficult this struggle must be for you..."

Natalia sighed heavily. "I won't lie to you, Olivia— it has been difficult. That's why I fought it for so long…" she openly confessed.

"And now?" Olivia anxiously queried; searching Natalia's eyes in hopes of collecting a clue as to her impending response.

"And now—" Natalia began, considering her response carefully, "Now I've made my peace with God… and it isn't a struggle anymore."

Olivia exhaled a sigh of relief; yet, still, she wasn't completely satisfied that all was well. "How is that possible?" she inquired.

Natalia quietly considered the transformation she had experienced, and realized she couldn't offer explanation even if she tried. "I don't even know when it happened, Olivia," she sighed; abandoning all attempts at reason, "when the idea of us being Emma's 'two mommies,' with everything that entails, changed… from being threatening… to being everything I want… the only thing I need… All I do know… is that I love you, Olivia Spencer…"

"Have you any idea how long I've waited to hear you say that?" Olivia grinned; no longer able to hold at bay, the smile that had played on her lips during the younger woman's avowal.

"Ohhh, I think I have some idea," Natalia laughed lightly; rewarding Olivia with one of those dimpled smiles.

"Stop it!" Olivia laughed; a knowing smile playing on her lips.

"Well— I'm just sayin'…" Natalia grinned; casting Olivia a flirty sideways glance.

Olivia offered a sexy smile in return; eyes locked on Natalia's. "So… where do we go from here?" she asked; voice so thick and alluring that Natalia thought she would explode from the mere resonance.

Neither of them could offer a definitive response; a fact which left them in a state of anxious excitement. Two hearts raced in anticipation, as Natalia drew Olivia back into her embrace. She inhaled a deep breath, gazing up at the taller woman; eyes alight with adoration. "I love you, Olivia, and… I wanna be with you; live here… in this house, raising Emma with you… no matter the cost…" she declared. "Rafe will be home soon…" she said optimistically, "and as long as the three of you are here with me, healthy and safe, I don't need anything else."

"Are you certain?" Olivia quietly asked; allowing Natalia the courtesy of a final escape if she so desired.

"I've never been more certain of anything in my life," Natalia whispered confidently.

A triumphant smile spread across Olivia's lips, illuminating her entire face, as she leaned in; nuzzling the younger woman's ear, "I love you, Natalia…" she breathed; warm breath flirting with loose tendrils of raven hair, as lips gently brushed an inviting lobe.

Natalia moaned softly in reaction to the low, enticing register of Olivia's voice; to the touch of her lips; and Olivia drew back, pleasantly surprised by the younger woman's corporeal response. A satisfied smile played on her lips, and she lifted her right hand, gently brushing Natalia's cheek as she swept past; tunneling long, agile fingers through, dark tresses; tenderly caressing the back of the younger woman's neck. Natalia gulped; the edges of her mouth twitching in nervous anticipation.

Eyes fused; brown on jade…

Hearts pounded…

Pulses raced…

The moment suspended in time…

Natalia's desire-laden eyes breezed across Olivia's full, inviting lips, anticipation coursing through heated veins.

Olivia's jade eyes dilated in response; turning dark, stormy with desire, as she slowly moistened those lips with a velvety tongue…

Without seeking permission, a sequence of reminiscences flashed through Natalia's mind—Memories of Olivia savoring a piece of breakfast cheesecake, literally moaning with pleasure as she rolled it around in her mouth... that wide, avid mouth… Memories of Olivia expertly manipulating the olives in countless martinis with that wanton tongue… And vanilla ice cream cones? Forget about it. Natalia was rendered powerless over the affect Olivia had on her when she savored the cool smoothness of a vanilla ice cream cone… Oh, how she longed for those lips to touch her own; for that mouth, that tongue, to—

Before untamed thoughts could run their course, Olivia dipped down, lightly brushing her lips against Natalia's; fulfilling the younger woman's unspoken longings, as if she could read her mind. Even at Olivia's slightest touch, Natalia felt the gentle stirring of desire ripple through her body. A sharp intake of breath at the touch of their lips provided Olivia with the signal she craved, and she slowly covered Natalia's mouth with her own.

Their kiss was slow, deliberate, yet light and liquid— an amalgamation of the fiery passion embedded in every heated argument; the safety of every comforting embrace they had shared. It was their effervescent laughter and their unashamed tears… every illuminating smile and every cantankerous scowl… It was every longing gaze and every knowing glance… their loving thoughts and their big purple dreams… It was every pause, every breath, and every word of every conversation… every tender touch and every whispered exchange… every emotion, spoken and unspoken; the crescendo of every shared experience that had led them to this moment…

Natalia's lips parted slightly; allowing entrance to Olivia's silky tongue, and a low, guttural moan formed in the younger woman's diaphragm, billowing up through her lungs; escaping her throat upon their initial contact. "Olivia—" she whispered breathily. It was almost like a prayer.

Olivia's body instinctively reacted to Natalia's unexpectedly feral response; lightening bolts of liquid desire surging through her veins, engraving a fiery path from her lips to the aching peaks of her breasts and down to her flaming center, where they gathered; vehemently pleading for release.

Natalia's arms found their way around Olivia's neck; fingers channeling through soft chestnut locks, as Olivia reflexively infused their kiss with evidence of her own burning need. She hooked her index and middle fingers through the belt loops of Natalia's jeans; pulling the younger woman's body firmly against her own; savoring the nearness of her. Natalia surrendered herself to Olivia's kisses; to the sensuous caresses of that velvet tongue; allowing unspoken pleasures, as she melted into the hotelier's embrace; savoring the seamless way their bodies melded together. As their kisses intensified, Natalia found herself experiencing a deep quickening of desire, a blazing rush of liquid heat, the force of which she had never previously known— a force which she now could not, and did not desire to, control.

Though they had each, unbeknownst to the other, expended countless hours imagining this very moment; how it would feel to embrace one another on a level much deeper than friendship, how it would feel when their lips touched, when tongues collided, nothing had prepared them for the reality of this life-altering encounter. Olivia, who was certainly no stranger to passion and desire, found herself completely unraveling, physically and emotionally, in the arms of this woman. The one woman for whom she would sacrifice anything; including her own happiness. The woman she loved…

Their kiss broke only when air became desperate necessity, and the instant that need had been satisfied, impatient mouths fused; searing tongues entangling once again. Natalia ached for more and she drew the hotelier closer; pressing into her as unbridled passion rose within; leaving her body and emotions in a frenzied state, while Olivia fought to suppress her own rising desire. She knew they were fighting a losing battle, and she shifted their bodies; the wooden planks of the farmhouse floor creaking under their feet, as she maneuvered them toward her bed.

"Olivia—" Natalia moaned breathlessly against the hotelier's mouth, "we can't—" she exhaled; disappointment rising in her chest, and spilling out in her tone. "Emma…"

No sooner had the child's name been uttered, and they heard the energetic bounce of Emma's sock-covered feet thumping across the wooden planks outside Olivia's door. Little fingers grasped the door handle, and before the two women could extricate themselves from their entangled embrace, the bedroom door burst open. "Mommy, I'm hungry!" Emma announced; halted in her tracks by the scene playing out in front of her.

The two women simultaneously cleared their throats, turning to face the little girl, arms still wrapped around one another's bodies; powerless to hide the matched set of passion-flushed faces, and kiss-swollen lips.

Emma quizzically surveyed her two mommies; head tilted to one side as she attempted to process the information her observations had gathered. "Mom?" she called; garnering Olivia's attention.

"Uhh… Yes, Jellybean?" Olivia replied; tone rife with hesitation, as she nervously cleared her throat again.

"Were you kissing Natalia?" the little girl questioned.

Olivia lifted her one available hand to her lips; biting down on her thumb and middle finger, as she contemplated her response. She cast a sideways glance at Natalia; receiving an unsteady smile in return. Exhaling heavily, she nodded her head. "Yes, Baby… I was kissing Natalia," she confessed; hoping the child wouldn't press for more information than she was prepared to provide at the moment.

Emma scrunched up her nose; looking much like her mother when in deep thought, as she carefully considered the new information.

Despite the intensity of the moment, Natalia couldn't help but smile as she recognized how much of Olivia there was in this little girl. Though she had once thought it impossible to love either of them more, in that very moment, she realized that her love for them truly held no bounds.

A moment later Emma tilted her head the other way, brow furrowed. "Mom?" she called again.

"Yes—?" Olivia answered; slight trepidation evident in her tone.

Natalia shifted nervously at her side, as they waited for the impending follow up inquiry.

"Does Natalia give you those butterfly thingies in your tummy?" the child asked innocently.

Unable to halt the spread of the smile that played on her lips, the corners of Olivia's mouth turned upward. "Yes— she does…" she admitted joyfully; casting a knowing glance toward Natalia; thankful to finally be allowed to divulge her truth.

Natalia blushed slightly; not that one could tell, considering the remnants of unquenched desire still flushed those smooth olive cheeks. She buried her face in Olivia's shoulder for a moment; but was quickly drawn back to the conversation by an inquiry directed toward her.

"Does Mommy give you butterflies in your tummy, Natalia?" Emma queried; eyes shining brightly.

Blushing more deeply, Natalia nodded her head. "Yes, Honey," she smiled; returning the knowing glance she had received from Olivia; equal thankfulness in her own heart. "Mommy gives me butterflies… Great big ones… with lots of fluttering wings…"

Olivia tightened her grip on Natalia's waist; wordlessly communicating her concurrence of those big, fluttering wings. Natalia squeezed her in return, as she smiled down at Emma. "Now… whaddaya say we go downstairs and fix some lunch, my Hungry Little Bear," she suggested; reaching down; pinching Emma's cheek fondly.

Emma hopped up and down excitedly; offering suggestions of peanut butter and banana sandwiches and cheesecake, as Natalia leaned over, whispering a gentle reminder to Olivia that she needed to keep her strength up, so she would be ready to face Phillip when the time came.

Olivia nodded in agreement. "Sounds like a plan."

Natalia released her hold on Olivia, and bent down, scooping Emma up into her arms; kissing that freshly pinched cheek and tickling her lightly; eliciting a succession of giggles from the little girl. Olivia laughed lightheartedly; watching the woman she loved, playing with her little girl. Her heart fluttered in her chest; echoing in her tummy, as she watched Natalia with Emma, and a fresh wave of love and appreciation washed over her. A singular thought crossed her mind: How did I, Olivia Spencer, get so damn lucky…

As they exited the bedroom, Olivia reached out, placing a gentle hand on the younger woman's arm. Natalia turned her head; acknowledging the contact. She found misty eyes gazing back at her. "Thank you…" Olivia whispered.

Natalia nodded her head; instinctively knowing all that Olivia was saying. "You're welcome," she quietly answered. "I love you…"

Olivia smiled; drawing Natalia close to her again; kissing her softly. "I know—" she whispered. "And I love you…"

Emma giggled again; beaming at her two mommies, and the three of them descended the stairs; heading into the kitchen to share lunch together.