Hanley

Chapter XIV: Grand Line B-Side

Krut Hanley

The next day dawned bright and sunny, as if to match the cheerful atmosphere that had fallen over the crew. Crocus himself was all smiles, and was even kind enough not to comment on Luffy's terrible artwork as he painted the Straw Hat Jolly Roger over Laboon's scars.

"Hanuman have I ever told you how special you are?" Naturally, that didn't stop Hanley from making some pointed remarks, but she put that as spousal privilege.

"Yup!" Luffy replied without irony.

The others were mostly hard at work doing their chores—Nami was planning their next route while Sanji was fixing a rather healthy looking elephant trunk tuna for breakfast. Poor Usopp was left to fix the ship while Zoro had yet to really wake up.

"I am not a carpenter…get up and help, Zoro!" Usopp snapped to no avail.

"Now," Luffy dropped his brush and wiped his hands on his shorts, covered in splatters of paint, "you can't hit your head and make this sign disappear, alright? Not until we come back to see you!"

Crocus sniffed a bit as Laboon made a short barking noise and nodded.

Luffy smiled widely in approval.

"Good!"

Hanley chuckled and said, "You did good, goof."

"Then why did you yell at me?"

"Hanuman if I'm not yelling at you I'm probably dead."

Luffy considered this before nodding in agreement.

"Yeah. Guess I should keep you yelling, then."

"Aw, you're so cute!"

"Hanley your boobs—"

Nami's high-pitched scream sliced through the air like a gunshot, brining everyone to a quick halt.

"Oi, oi, what is it?" Hanley called.

"Yeah why'd you have to scream?" added Luffy.

"What happened Nami-san? If you are hungry I have food!" Sanji said as he practically leapt to her side with a large platter of steaming fish.

Nami shook her head and waved him off, a little red faced from stress.

"The compass is broken! It won't stop spinning!"

As if to prove her point she held it out for them to see. And indeed, the needle was going crazy; Hanley was concerned it would fly off its mount.

"Crocus-sensei, surely you have an extra we can borrow, right?" asked Hanley.

Crocus sighed and scratched the back of his head.

"You don't know anything about this place, do you?"

"I…have a feeling you're about to tell us."

Crocus scoffed and said, "Honestly, how am I supposed to tell my brother if you get killed? Look: I told you that you cannot use common sense here. Your compass is hardly broken; but it's as good as."

"What do you mean?" asked Nami, frowning. "Is it a magnetic field?"

"Yes, because every island has its own field, and it creates a cumulative effect—the entire sea is covered in such a field. That creates other effects too: the wind and sea are very unpredictable! I told you this before, hm?"

Hanley nodded.

"Yeah, you did…"

Crocus turned to Nami.

"If you are a true navigator, you must know these things! If you move forward without any knowledge you will only die."

Nami licked her lips and replied, "Yes, you're right. I wasn't thinking. And I don't really know how to solve this problem, so…"

"Hey, this is bad! We could die!" Usopp shouted.

"Even though you don't know, you are still beautiful!" Sanji added.

"Hoo boy," Hanley muttered.

Luffy, naturally, didn't appear to be following the conversation, choosing to stuff a large chunk of fish down his throat.

"Wha' ba'?"

Well, at least he had the decency to ask.

"Anyway," continued Crocus after several beats, "what you need is something called a Log Pose."

"'Log Pose'? I've never heard of such a thing," Nami said.

"Outside of this place you most likely wouldn't. It's a very special kind of compass."

"You mean strange compass?" Luffy asked.

"Yes, its shape is different from a regular compass."

"Oh," Luffy paused to swallow a large mouthful of fish, "you mean like this?"

Luffy reached into his pocket and held up what appeared to be a small, clear globe on a wristband. It certainly had the look of a compass, with the needle suspended in the middle; however, it was lacking a marking for North and other directions.

"Where the hell did you get that, Hanuman?" Hanley bent closer to get a better look.

"Yes, that's it. You must have a Log Pose to travel Grand Line but it's difficult to acquire one outside of it." Crocus added.

"Ok, ok, so, first…how did you get something like this?" Nami's fist connected with Luffy's cheek, sending him crashing to the ground.

"Hey now!" Hanley protested. "If anyone is going to be hitting him it's me! ...You're free to yell, though, he brings that out in people."

"Right, of course," Nami said primly as she looked at Luffy expectantly.

Luffy looked a little put out but finished swallowing.

"I got it from those mystery people, they left it on the ship."

"Oh, them?"

"Yeah…why'd you punch me, then?"

"I was just teasing you."

"Teasing?"

"Anyway!" Nami clapped her hands in excitement and picked up the compass.

"Each island in Grand Line has a unique magnetic field, yes? We have to save this magnetic field that attracts one island to another via the Log Pose," Crocus answered without prompting, electing to ignore the insanity before his eyes. "Once locked, we use it to guide us to the next destination."

"That's amazing…this place is…" Hanley trailed off, wondering once more, just how fantastic this all was.

"I suppose so; I'm used to it now. But know this: once you are out in the middle of nowhere that Log Pose is the only thing you can trust. First you must choose one of seven magnetic fields from this island. No matter where you begin, you will end up in the single direction of the last island…Raftel. According to history, the only group that has reached that island was Gold Roger and his crew. It is legendary."

Usopp gasped in excitement, "So One Piece must be on that island!"

"So it's said; no one's ever accomplished it, however."

"Well, you won't know unless you try!" Luffy remarked. "Can we go now? I'm full!"

Hanley finally noticed the giant skeleton where their breakfast used to be.

"Did you eat all of that, Hanuman?"

"…I saved some for you."

"Oh, well, it must be love," Hanley joked, as if it wasn't years of conditioning behind the action. Even Luffy caught on eventually.

"You're kinda weird."

"What about the rest of us!" protested Usopp.

Hanley shrugged and said, "Can't help you there; spousal privilege."

"What is Nami-san supposed to eat, you cretin?" Sanji roared, lifting a foot and planting a powerful kick in Luffy's face, once more sending him flying.

"Hey now! If anyone's going to be kicking him, it's going to be me! …Well, he really does bring it out in people," Hanley said.

"Oh, please excuse me, Madame—"

"You…" Nami hissed.

It was then that Hanley noticed the broken globe and Nami's stricken face. For someone with little physical training, she had no problems kicking Sanji and Luffy into the sea. Sanji looked a little too thrilled, though.

Crocus sighed and crossed his arms over his chest.

"I wonder if you'll really be okay. Don't worry, I was going to give you one in appreciation for all you've done."

"Oh, thank God," Nami whispered, legs going weak as she sank onto her seat.

The giant explosion in the distance ended that conversation.

*h*

"So…" Hanley began, staring at the groveling duo in front of her.

By the time Sanji and Luffy had managed to climb back up to the lighthouse proper, they had two certain whalers in tow, much to everyone's surprise. They were smoking a bit and looking worse for the wear and both appeared to be desperate.

"Whiskey Peak?" Luffy asked.

"Hell if I know," Hanley replied.

"They must be joking, right? After everything!" added Usopp.

"Please, it is up to your kindness now," Miss Wednesday begged, sniffling.

Crocus rolled his eyes, unmoved.

"Stop pretending already."

"They can come." Luffy's order was sudden and decisive. Hanley blinked in surprised as the others started to fill the sudden silence with their protests.

Luffy shook his head.

"She helped Hanley. They can come."

"I would have been fine…!" Hanley protested.

'Maybe…possibly.'

Miss Wednesday was silent for a few moments before answering.

"I thank you."

"Geez…oh well, captain's orders," Usopp said, shrugging and moving to finish their preparations for departure.

"Is the compass pointing in the right direction?" Crocus asked Nami, idly leaning against the side of the cliff face.

"Yes, it appears to be pointing toward Whiskey Peak," she answered, nodding in satisfaction.

Crocus hummed and pushed himself off the rock so that he was standing completely upright. He was content to watch them board the Going Merry before speaking.

"Are you sure that you want to choose Whiskey Peak for these people? Only you can choose your destination from here."

"If we don't like it we can come back."

Crocus chuckled at that, but it was the sight of Miss Wednesday and Mr. 9 snickering behind their hands that had Hanley frowning.

'Wonder what's so funny…'

"Well, best be going, then," Crocus said.

"Yeah, you're right! We're heading off!" Luffy hopped off the railing and raised his hands to wave at Laboon as Sanji dropped sail.

"I'm going now, whale, and I'll be back!"

"Buooo!" Laboon answered, happily showing off his new paint job.

"I really am proud of you, Hanuman," Hanley said as she watched Laboon, and the lighthouse, become smaller in the distance.

Luffy scratched his head and grinned.

"I didn't do much! He just needed someone."

"You got good instincts, sometimes. Dare I hope they'll improve?"

"Eh, I dunno."

Hanley laughed.

*h*

The island of Goa maintained a generally temperate clime throughout the year. Due to the higher altitude, there was sometimes some snowfall during her time on Eagle's Peak; however, down by the coast in Fuusha there was none at all. The steady temperatures meant that Hanley never had a real issue at all, and the sea was also generally warm and clean as well. During the winter and sometimes in a particularly hot summer, she had became somewhat more lethargic as the temperatures dropped or remained high, but even some humans experienced a decline in mood and energy as the seasons changed, so it was nothing to think about.

But this sea...Hanley was pretty sure this sea was going to kill her.

"This is," she panted, "not good."

"It's freezing in here, don't you people have a heater?" Miss Wednesday whined.

Of course they didn't, it was late spring in East Blue—they wouldn't have needed a heater well into October.

The sudden drop in temperature caused her head to throb and her energy levels plummeted. Her biology seemed to be in the midst of freaking out and focusing everything on keeping her insides well heated. Hanley slumped against the table, shivering under a blanket.

"You alright?" Nami seemed to be asking after her health frequently these days, much to Hanley's irritation. She was hoping to get to the point where they shouldn't have to worry over her.

"I'll live; I just have to adapt, give it time."

Nami sighed, "If you say so. As for you two, shut up! You're not our guests, don't take any liberties!"

Hanley felt herself smiling a bit as she listened to the laughter from beyond the galley walls.

"It's fine. My discomfort shouldn't get in the way of everyone's adventure. Besides, if it's too much I'll nag Hanuman about it. It's what I usually do."

A great crash of lightning interrupted their conversation, drawing an increasingly alarmed Nami towards the porthole.

"What sort of weather is this? It was hot only moments ago, and now…? The weather here really is uncertain, just as Crocus-san said…"

Miss Wednesday scoffed, "It seems you have underestimated Grand Line. You also haven't controlled your ship's rudder for a while, are you sure it's alright?"

Nami turned with furrowed brows, clearly perplexed.

"'A while'? I just checked the route a second ago."

Still, Nami glanced at the Log Pose on her wrist, before gasping and quickly bringing it closer with a shriek.

"How can this be?"

Hanley started to speak, "Tsuna—"

But Nami was already out the door, shouting orders to turn the ship 180 degrees. How in the world that happened without anyone noticing was something Hanley didn't want to think about.

The situation only seemed to worsen as the wind changed direction and Hanley had to throw off her blanket before she overheated.

'I'm dying…'

Nami was in top form, barking orders and forming the others into a cohesive, responsive unit. For a crew that looked to be built on chaos, it was quite impressive. It also meant that she couldn't sit here like an asshole.

That would be Zoro's job, as he was still sleeping.

Hanley huffed and cringed at the sticky feeling of dried sweat on her skin.

"Tsunami, tell me what to do."

"It should be okay now—"

"We need all the help we can get and we both know it."

The next several minutes felt far too long as their ship was buffeted by unpredictable waves and wind. Hanley wondered if they were even going to make it to Whiskey Peak at one point, when an iceberg appeared out of nowhere from the fog and they very nearly rammed it head on.

"Hanley! Open the sail!"

"Got it!"

By the time Hanley had untied the last rope the sea settled just as quickly as it had turned violent. Her head was ringing and her body was shaking, as it was just as confused as the rest of her.

"Hey, Hanley?" Luffy asked.

Hanley looked up blearily, squinting against the now shining sun. If she had more energy she'd be furious at it.

"I told you I'm good. Just a little sensitive to temperature apparently, I'll figure something out—"

Zoro's loud yawn cut through the silence just as quickly as his swords did flesh, and he even had the nerve to stretch and roll his neck as if he was on some sort of pleasure cruise.

"That was a good sleep!" He hopped to his feet. "Huh? The weather may be good, but everyone shouldn't be lying around. Are you sure we aren't lost?"

Hanley licked her lips before pulling Luffy's face close.

"If you loved me, you would kill him."

Luffy laughed, "I guess you are just fine!"

"I am so serious right now you had better murder him—"

"Why're they here, anyway?" Zoro asked, nodding to the prone forms of Miss Wednesday and Mr. 9.

'Was he asleep this entire time?'

"We're taking them to their village!" came Luffy's cheerful reply.

Hanley slumped against the main mast with a groan. His energy just made her tired.

"Don't tell me we're really going there. We've no reason to do that."

"They helped Hanley, that's really all."

"Huh," Zoro shrugged at that before crouching before them. "You aren't thinking of doing anything bad, are you? What are your names again?"

"Miss Wednesday…"

"Mr. 9…"

Zoro rubbed his chin thoughtfully.

"Your names remind me of something. I've heard about them from somewhere…"

'He has?' Hanley hummed and became lost in thought, tuning out Nami (who was apparently the actual love of her life) beating Zoro for his laziness.

'I thought their names were weird, but no more weird than usual around here. I wonder…'

"Listen up, everyone! I now truly understand why they call this place Grand Line! It seems my usual techniques won't work!" Nami declared.

Usopp coughed, "Are we gonna be okay…?"

"Of course, look!" Nami smiled, smug, and motioned in the distance. "An island with giant cacti!"

"You have got to be joking," Hanley said, laughing a bit out of sheer disbelief.

"So this is Whiskey Peak," noted Sanji.

"I am so shocked we didn't die."

"Well, it's been fun!"

Hanley jumped in surprise as the two would-be-whalers flipped onto the ship's railing.

"We do thank you for bringing us here," began Mr. 9.

"We shall meet again if we are destined to," Miss Wednesday finished.

"Bye bye, Baby!" And with that they flipped off the deck and dove into the now calm waters surrounding the island.

"…What the shit?" Hanley asked, filing the prolonged silence.

Usopp groaned, "Just who were those guys anyway?..."

"Don't worry about that," Luffy said, "let's go to port!"

"I do see a river ahead, we should be able to make land there," Zoro said.

"Are there any ghosts or monsters there, do you think?" Usopp asked.

"It's possible; it's the Grand Line, after all," replied Sanji.

"We can go to another island, right?"

Nami said, "Not so fast. Don't forget we have to spend time on this island. If my Log Pose can't lock in our next destination we aren't going anywhere. And the time it takes for the Log Pose to set varies from island to island. It can take from 2-3 hours to 2-3 days."

"Really?"

"Don't you ever pay attention to anything at all?"

"Anyway!" Luffy interrupted, "We would be crazy not to go!"

"You got it backwards," complained Usopp.

Hanley sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose to stave off her headache.

"Just be ready to fight; or run, if necessary, okay?"

"Hai, Hanley-samaaaa!" Sanji answered.

"Look, the fog's going down. Get ready," said Zoro.

There were a few tense moments as the noise from the island grew louder and the fog dissipated, but nothing prepared Hanley for what she saw.

"WELCOME, PIRATES!"

Crowds of people had gathered at the mouth of the river, cheering and waving flags and other bits of cloth. Hanley and Nami shared a shocked look before turning back to the spectacle. The others weren't nearly as bothered, immediately diving in after lowering the plank.

"This is weird," Hanley said.

Nami hummed, "Do you trust this?"

"After seeing those two in action? Nope."

"Agreed. Hanley, keep an eye out," Nami murmured as she made to follow the others' disembarking.

"Heh, yes, ma'am."

"There are so many beautiful girls!" Sanji cheered and all but pirouetted away.

"Keep an eye on that, you say…right," muttered Hanley as she joined the others on shore.

At the forefront was an older man with long, curly blond hair and wearing a crisp suit. He held a saxophone in his grip for reasons Hanley could only guess at.

"Welcome! My name is Igarappoi. This is Whiskey Peak, the town of music and liquor! It is our honor to welcome you," he said, smiling and bowing slightly, "We have quite a bit of liquor to share! Please tell us about your journey; and, if possible, we would like for you to attend a party!"

"Sure!" Sanji, Luffy, and Usopp agreed, much to Nami's clear annoyance.

"Yes, well. How long will it take to record the magnetic fields of this island?" Nami asked Igarappoi as the three chuckleheads danced around. Zoro appeared far more reserved, but smirked a bit and accepted a large, frothy pint of amber liquid.

Igarappoi waved off Nami's question.

"Record? We shall talk about that after you've rested! Let's party, everyone! And start the music to welcome these brave warriors!"

*h*

Hanley was not the partying type. Even back in Nihon she had preferred a small group of friends and balked at the thought of trying to make new ones. The habit was reinforced while she lived with Master Thai, who himself was the definition of an anti-social hermit. On her best days, she liked to sit to the side and watch, usually, only really participating when Luffy or Ace dragged her in. The color festival at Eagle's Peak was about the only party she really abandoned her usual sense of propriety, and only then it was because that festival was special to her.

So she was content to watch the others eat and drink (and in Sanji's case flirt) with such energy that even the locals were hard pressed to keep up. Hanley had quietly accepted a beer and lounged on a couch away from the center of activity. Her headache was back, much to her dismay. She hadn't said anything because she didn't want to upset anyone, but she had felt off ever since Fiddler's Green. At first she thought it was exhaustion, then when the wildly fluctuating temperatures wreaked havoc on her insides she figured it would settle once they got to a stable climate. It certainly had, somewhat, but the temperate, humid air of Whiskey's Peak wasn't helping, either. It would probably fade, as it had only been two days really, but still it was annoying.

"You are quiet, unlike your crew members."

Hanley jumped in surprise when Igarappoi appeared before her, frowning in concern.

"I prefer it quiet."

"My apologies! It was most inconsiderate to assume. Why, even I become tired easily…not as young as I used to be," he chuckled.

"Yeah, well, I feel old."

"Why not go out for some fresh air? Whiskey Peak is stunning in the moonlight, and I imagine all this noise isn't helping your constitution!"

Hanley hesitated, unease feeling her at letting the others out of her sight.

"It doesn't have to be a long one," Igarappoi hastened to assure her once he saw her expression. "Just around the block and back. I daresay you'll hear us the entire time."

That was true, and Hanley was feeling so poorly that she probably wouldn't be much use if she stayed. It may be best to take a quick breather. Also, it would give her a chance to stake out the area.

Hanley tipped her head back and downed the rest of her beverage.

"Yeah, maybe you're right."

"Of course. You are our guests. It would be remiss of me not to look after your best interests. Ah!" He turned when he heard a crash from where the kitchens were most likely located. "I had better see to that. That young one is going through our stores quite quickly!"

"He does that," Hanley replied as she watched him race off. She grinned and pushed her way through the mess to reach her husband.

"Hanuman!"

Luffy brightened and waved, "Hi, Hanley!"

"I'm taking a quick walk. Behave yourself!"

"Yeah, okay!" he replied before nearly diving into a rack of ribs. Hanley shook her head and left him to it. The others were so involved in their celebration they probably wouldn't miss her for long.

The feeling of cool, sea air was a relief the moment she stepped out of the stuffy bar. A waxing gibbous hung low in the sky, illuminating the giant cacti in the distance. There was some cloud cover, but even the stars were shining brightly. Hanley had to admit to herself that it was gorgeous to see.

Whiskey Peak had little in the way of streetlights. Hanley shoved her hands into the pockets of her trousers and made her way down the dusty roads. The sounds of merrymaking faded into the background, but Igarappoi was right in saying she would be able to hear it even from a distance.

Hanley reached what appeared to be the town square, lined with now empty stalls and a sizeable well in the center. Hanley stretched and took a deep breath of clean air before sighing.

"Who the fuck is following me?"

A sudden whistling sound from her left forced her to duck, barely missing taking a small projectile to the temple. Unfortunately, it appeared to be a decoy, as she felt a large hand wrap around her wrist and jab a needle into her neck. Hanley couldn't even scream from the pain, but her reflexes saved her as her knee came up and kicked the attacker into the distance.

Hanley's vision quickly started to fade and she doubled over and dry heaved. She hadn't eaten in a while and she wasn't sure if that was a good thing now or not. Hanley heard shouts from behind but whatever was in that needle had also seemed to take away her higher brain functions as her instincts took over. She found herself running even though she wasn't sure when she had given her legs the order.

'Water! Need to find water need to go home—'

Hanley opened her mouth and tasted the air, scenting five of them coming from her ten o'clock. She jumped up onto a nearby roof and staggered along the flat, dusty top, hissing in agitation. Her heartbeat was starting to grow sluggish as the sedative worked through her system; like hell she was going down like this!

If they were stupid enough to corner her she would kill them.

Miss Wednesday

Still rattled from their previous encounter with the Unluckies, Miss Wednesday and Mr. 9 hurried towards the town proper. She fervently hoped this would be enough to appease them for now.

She found Igarappoi standing outside the now quiet bar, staring skyward as if in some sort of meditation.

"They have stopped being noisy and have gone to sleep. I wish those brave warriors a nice dream," he sighed, smiling slightly. "Tonight, Cactus Mountain looks extremely beautiful under the moonlight."

Miss Wednesday couldn't help but chuckle a bit as she sank onto one of the rooftops above him.

"That sounds so profound, Mr. 8!"

Mr. 8 nodded and shrugged, turning his body slightly to watch their descent.

"Ah, it is you!"

"How are they doing?"

Mr. 8 gave the moon one last look and turned to face her. She watched his expression harden.

"They are falling into Hell."

"Oh God, they drank and ate a lot!" A new voice came from behind them as a large, well-muscled woman exited the building with an irritated sigh. She all but slammed the door behind her and rolled her neck as if to crack it.

"Miss Monday," Mr. 8 greeted her.

"So do you think it's worth having a party for those stupid looking kids? It would have been better to take care of them at port, as our town is out of food. Not only that, we have failed to get that whale's meat." The last comment was clearly pointed at Miss Wednesday, who felt herself bristle with indignation.

"And what is that supposed to mean!"

"We tried very hard!" Mr. 9 added. "And we have something better than whale meat, don't we?"

Miss Monday raised a skeptical eyebrow before nodding in acquiescence.

"The snake, yes? We sell her for the right price and we will be set for years. And yet…I do not see her."

Miss Wednesday frowned in confusion. A quick glance to Mr. 8 showed a brief tightening of his lips.

"I…was unaware we were targeting her specifically? She didn't seem all that special," Mr. 8 said.

Miss Monday replied, "Really? Well, they are quite rare. I wasn't sure at first but I don't believe I am wrong. I asked that one to take care of it for me. Well?"

Mr. 9 looked sheepish.

"It appears the sedative wasn't strong enough."

"Fool! Now she'll be in survival mode and we could lose a lot of people trying to get her!"

"Calm down! We can leave her for later," Mr. 8 quickly intervened, pulling out two pieces of parchment. Miss Wednesday noticed him hesitate slightly before stuffing one back in his pocket. "Take a look."

The others crowded around the parchment, revealed to be a bounty poster, and gaped in shock. Miss Wednesday could hardly believe it. How could someone like that boy possibly warrant such a high bounty?

'And what is he hiding in his pocket?' Miss Wednesday resolved to ask him later, half-listening to Miss Monday and Mr. 9 shout in surprise.

"It is shameful to underestimate those pirates, Miss Monday."

"I…I apologize," she replied, bowing her head slightly.

"Nevermind! After we have taken care of them we can contact the boss. Now hurry and steal their treasure from the ship, and tie them up. The bounty will decrease by 30% if they are not brought back alive for execution."

"Sorry," another voice called out from the darkness, "I don't think I can let you do that."

"Another one is missing!" one of the agents stumbled out of the bar in a panic.

Miss Wednesday gasped and looked around, trying to discern where it came from.

Mr. 9 pointed and shouted, "Up there! The swordsman!"

Miss Wednesday followed his line of sight to the top of the bar. Framed by the moonlight, he actually looked quite menacing, and the sharp glint of his teeth sent a shiver of fear down her spine. They hadn't had to deal with particularly strong pirates, as they were located at the entrance to Grand Line. However, Miss Wednesday knew that was about to change. First the boy in straw hat, then the snake, and now…

"So this is the truth, hm? This place is a trap for pirate hunters who are waiting for those coming to the Grand Line," the swordsman continued, unconcerned. He made a show of standing and idly looking at the masses of people slowly forming below him, hefting a variety of weapons. "A hundred hunters, it looks like. I'll be your opponent tonight. And for your sakes, our companion had better not be hurt."

"Is that a threat?" Miss Wednesday found herself asking.

"Of course it's a threat. But it's not me you'll have to worry about…Baroque Works!"

Miss Wednesday flinched in shock. How—

"How do you know the name of our company?" Mr. 9 shrieked.

"When I was a hunter, your company sent an agent to ask me to join you…I rejected it. Every employee's past is a secret, and everyone will call each other by their codename. And no one will know who is the boss or where he lives. You are a group of mercenaries who will follow any order without question, and you will call yourselves 'Baroque Works'…or is this supposed to be a classified?"

Mr. 8 cleared his throat.

"Maa maa maa… How surprising! So you know our secret. We very well can't let you live in that case. We will add one more gravestone to Cactus Mountain.

KILL HIM!"

Krut Hanley

She was back in her childhood home.

The room before her was empty, and the air was stale as if it had been unlived in for quite some time. The old, low table was gone, leaving behind only tatami that desperately needed to be replaced. The only piece of furniture left was the small writing desk holding her grandmother's old radio.

And it was playing.

Hanley blinked in confusion and walked towards it, feeling as if she were walking through water. It was a woman, high-pitched and in pain, her voice broken by some sort of interference and static.

"What…?" Hanley murmured. She shouldn't even be here, she was doing something else, wasn't she? Why was this so hard?

The woman sounded frantic, "I…an't…this…dying…"

"Save…daugh…sa…Han…"

The woman was fading, and with it Hanley felt an acute panic to get to her. But Grandma's radio was unpredictable at the best of times and turning the dial or smacking it did nothing to fix the problem.

"Wait…wait! I want to—"

Hanley blinked when she found herself in a small, dark room. It was cluttered with tomes and vials, and a large desk took up a great deal of one of the walls. A very familiar man was currently grinding a powder with mortar and pestle, humming under his breath.

"Ishamon-sensei?"

He didn't move, or seem to acknowledge her existence. Hanley stumbled backwards until she hit the door with a thud. Ishamon still didn't look up from his ministrations. Hanley grasped the door handle and yanked. Naturally, it didn't give, forcing her to turn back and look for another way to escape.

She finally noticed the figure on the bed.

"There we go, Lass. That should do it," Ishamon spoke. He carefully spooned out the required amount of powder onto a piece of thin paper, mixing it with something else that Hanley couldn't' identify. He tipped the mixture into a glass of water with practiced ease.

"You lost a lot of nutrients in addition to water, so we need to take care of that as quickly as possible, hm?"

Hanley focused on the figure on the bed. It was her. It was her ten years ago. She didn't realize how small she was back then, and spindly. Her dark skin had taken a waxy appearance and her eyes were glazed and filmy—quite a bit like a snake about to shed its skin. Her hair was even whiter than Ishamon's.

What was this? This couldn't be real.

The younger Hanley was both listless and trembling, limbs jerking as if she was suffering from the aftereffects of electrocution.

"You'll be alright…Stay with me and breathe."

Roronoa Zoro

For a super secret organization that spanned countless territories, he was having a pretty easy time mowing them down.

"Whoops!" he muttered, dodging a wild swing from a two by four. "Got a little distracted."

Zoro used the hilt of his sword to knock his attacker into the wall, where they slid down and remained still. His swords were everything he had wanted and more. Yubashiri handled so slightly and responsively; however, he would have to keep an eye Sandai Kitetsu's sharpness.

Zoro ducked behind a building for a quick breather and to take stock of the situation. As far as he knew Luffy, Nami, Sanji, and Usopp were still sleeping in the bar. They should be safe and could keep for a while longer. But…

"Where the hell is she?" Zoro growled in annoyance. He had yet to see her, and he highly doubted these weaklings could have overpowered her so easily. No, something happened, and he had to locate her before they were able to finish what they had planned. They mentioned selling her, so maybe the docks…but he had yet to find them, for some reason. He could have sworn—

"Ah ha!"

Zoro quickly rolled to his right, narrowly missing being struck by the muscular woman's improvised weapon. The wooden ladder didn't survive the assault, shattering into splinters.

'That's pretty dangerous!'

Miss Monday proved to be more spry than he anticipated quickly catching him and slamming him back onto the ground, hand clutching his neck.

"Dammit!" Zoro snapped right before she planted her brass knuckles in his face. The pain was significant.

It only pissed him off.

He reached up and grabbed her face and squeezed. She screamed, but Zoro was merciless, using the opportunity to get back on his feet.

"What's wrong? Has all your strength gone? Didn't you want to challenge me?"

She only let out a gurgle in response as he dropped her. Zoro sighed and rolled his shoulders; they had started to tighten, as it had been a long time since he's had to fight for such an extended period of time.

'Well, good training, if nothing else.'

"Miss Monday!"

"This cannot be!"

Zoro idly licked the blood from his lip.

"Shall we continue, Baroque Works? I feel like I should inform you that playing is not the same as fighting."

Mr. 8 growled, "The Marines must have botched up their info!"

"I agree, I think this man is the one who deserves thirty million berries; is he the real captain?" added Mr. 9.

"So the truth has revealed itself! That's why it was so strange…how can that stupid looking kid be worth thirty million berries," said Miss Wednesday.

"This is good, now we know what we're dealing with. We must find that girl, quickly!" Mr. 8 pulled a parchment from his pocket and showed the others. Zoro watched as the other two gasped.

"No wonder, he must be furious!"

"Married…we should locate her quickly, this could be to our advantage."

'What are they even talking about? Well, doesn't matter to me.'

"Still, what a shame," Mr. 8 said, "Boss asked us to take care of this town, and yet we've lost to a single, solitary swordsman. This is a serious problem."

Mr. 8 lifted his saxophone and blew.

"Igarappa!"

Krut Hanley

'Why am I seeing this…?'

The radio was now silent. Hanley picked it up and shook it, before screaming in anger and throwing it across the room.

'This is it, I've lost it, I've really lost it! This isn't a dream so is that other place the one that's not real? Is One Piece not real?'

"Hanley, you have to wake up, now."

Hanley whirled around, even more confused than ever.

"What?"

"Wake up, Hanley."

"It's…it's coming from outside," Hanley muttered, half hysterical as she marched to the shoji leading to the garden. "Is that you, Oya—"

Natsuhiko stared at her silently for a moment before speaking.

"I'm glad you're awake, Hanley."

Hanley glared at him, throat as dry as the desert but having little desire to speak to her former friend regardless. He gave a small, sad sigh and leaned back in his chair.

"Oh Hanley…I didn't want it to be this way at all. Everything I'm doing is what must be done, you know?"

Hanley shook her head, obstinate in her silence.

"You must think I'm crazy, Hanley. And you know what?" He leaned forward, eyes gleaming in a way she had never seen before. Natsuhiko had never scared her before, but in that moment she felt the first dregs of fear.

Hanley watched the scene before her, swaying slightly on her feet as the sedative still fought to bring her under.

'What is this…? Did this happen…? It must have been when I first regained consciousness…'

"You see, I…it's not so much the abuse or the slavery although," he laughed softly, as if amused, "that certainly didn't help. You see, I've been thinking for a while about this. About how, the longer I stayed here, I felt myself…forgetting. I don't mean the usual, the way the memories of childhood fade like a photograph left in the sun for so long I mean the way the light fades as the sun goes down…only it doesn't really come back, you know? I felt as if I was…becoming disconnected? Like my mind and body weren't in sync?"

'When did this happen…? Did this happen…? I'm not dreaming again…'

"I had forgotten my father's name, Hanley. I couldn't remember my mother's name, nor how many siblings I had…if I even had any. I only remembered when I began talking to you—strange, isn't it? You…you were always so clear in my head I'm beginning to think it's sorcery. Or…maybe it's you, which, is about the same thing."

Natsuhiko sighed and rubbed his forehead in agitation.

"Do you know what that feels like, Hanley? What I most strongly remember is in connection to you. And I don't think you will degrade but there has been some concern that hopping between dimensions while in the womb could have negatively affected your growth. And being shoved right back through the eye of the needle couldn't have helped at all…could have knocked something lose so you'll be just as fucked up as I am."

'How do you know that, Natsuhiko?' Hanley opened her mouth to speak but no sound came; the air was so thick she could barely breathe.

"I have to do this, Hanley. I have to." Natsuhiko carefully ran his fingers down the arm of her twin lying on the bed, and Hanley could only watch, nauseous, praying that nothing was going to happen—"I was not meant to be in this world, my body was not meant for this place and…I've told you this before, but there really does seem to be something in the air here."

Natsuhiko turned briefly when Cassius approached the cell and murmured something too softly for her to make out. Much to her relief, Natsuhiko dropped his hand from her body—only to place the tips of his fingers on her forehead.

"Go back to sleep, Hanley."

Hanley came to in a small alley. Her sight was shot, not helped by the fact that twilight had fallen, but she could smell and taste and there were five warm bodies that would be on her soon if she didn't do something.

"This is my fault," Wadatsumi sighed as he knelt beside her.

"Oyaji?...How are you here?"

"You won't let me go, dear…and that is the crux of the problem."

Hanley groaned and took deep breaths in an attempt to manage the nausea rolling in her stomach.

"So I'm still hallucinating and you're not here either…"

"Mortals weren't meant for this—bouncing back and forth between planes." He sighed, then, bone deep and so very sad. "The Fiddler is one such example. Something always goes wrong. Always."

'I don't think you'll degrade but there has been some concern…could have knocked something lose so you'll be just as fucked up as I am…there really does seem to be something in the air here.'

"I had little choice, Handerson couldn't get her hands on you. But now…ten years in the other world is finally catching up to you; it's why you're changing much too fast and falling into Fiddler's Green hasn't helped—"

"Oyaji," Hanley interrupted his ranting, "can you help me?"

"Oh sweetheart…"

He didn't say but she knew the answer.

"What do I do?"

"All you can try to do is live."

Hanley hissed and pushed herself into a standing position. Wadatsumi had faded to who knows where, if he was ever even there to begin with. The five enemies had moved on into the distance, but two new ones were coming closer. One was much larger than the other with a rapid heartbeat. The scent from the smaller one, however, was calming.

She knew it, somehow…

Hanley allowed to them to come closer, confused and frightened and wondering why it was familiar.

"Oh thank God, you're here," the other one whispered.

Hanley couldn't help but snarl regardless, causing the other one's mount to jolt.

"No, it's okay, I won't hurt you. This wasn't supposed to happen. May I?"

'I know her…Miss Wednesday…but that doesn't explain…'

"Do you like my perfume? It's from home…it used to be used as an offering. It should calm you down, right?"

"Yeah…" Hanley answered, because it really was calming her down. Her panic was slowly but surely draining away as she scented the air. It reminded her of the flowers that would bloom at the base of Eagle's Peak come springtime. It even smelled vaguely of her grandmother's perfume, the one her grandfather saved up for every year so he could give it to her on their wedding anniversary. Hanley felt her eyes begin to sting and it took everything in her not to cry.

"This should never have happened, Snakes are sacred…Igaram was supposed to send you away but we had no idea they would do this."

Miss Wednesday wiped the sweat away from her face before uncorking a flask.

"They probably used our normal sedative and it can have unpleasant side effects even on humans. Drink this."

Hanley didn't even know why she trusted her not to completely knock her out; she was so miserable, however, that she couldn't give much of a fuck if it did put her to sleep.

"Okay, that's good. Let's get you on Carue. Your husband's going on a rampage and you should do the trick."

'A rampage...? Sounds like Hanuman…'

Miss Wednesday

The ride back was awkward. Snakes tended to grow quite large, and this one was no exception. Miss Wednesday had a hard time even keeping her on Carue, much less ensuring that she wasn't dragging any limbs on the ground. The Snake—Han…Hany? Happy?

"Hebi-san," Miss Wednesday finally settled on a name as they sped through town. She hoped Igaram and Mr.9 were safe. That swordsman's strength was terrible; it was no wonder Baroque Works had sought to recruit him.

"Once we capture him Igaram and I will sneak you off the island…back to Reverse Mountain. It should be safe enough there. We'll figure something out."

In this instance having so many agents compromised could be a good thing. It would give them a chance to carry out their plan before someone came down to check on them. She may have gone in deep to accomplish her objective, but she wasn't so far gone as to give up a Snake for slavery…or worse.

"We're almost—oh…oh no!" Miss Wednesday cried out and pulled Carue to a sharp stop. "Not them…"

The man and woman before her were the last people she wanted to see.

'This isn't good at all!'

At first glance, they were total opposites. The man was tall and dark, with a stoic personage made even more severe by the sunglasses perched on his nose. His long coat was blood red under the moonlight, a stark contrast to the number "5" embroidered on his left breast. The woman was small and brightly colored even at night. She had a bright smile on her face, but Miss Wednesday could feel its menace.

Miss Wednesday was well familiar with how quickly a situation could go so wrong so fast, but even she was shocked at their bad luck.

Still, she may be able to make this work.

"Mr. 5! Miss Valentine! It's good that you're here! We should finally be able to overcome that swordsman!"

"That's right," Mr. 9 added, coughing, "please take care of that swordsman."

Mr. 8 and Mr. 9 were laying nearly prone on the ground, well-bloodied, much to her shock. Miss Wednesday swallowed and fought to hide her nerves. On top of that, Hebi-san had stopped moving and seemed to be barely breathing. This was such a mess she wasn't sure what to do.

Mr. 5 finally spoke with an ill-disguised sneer, "Shouldn't you be ashamed of yourselves? Hm? Losing to a single man?"

"Hahaha! That's the difference between you weaklings and us~" added Miss Valentine.

"You came here just to laugh at us?" Mr. 8 gasped as he struggled to stand.

"Not only that, no," Mr. 5 remarked.

"Then you will help us?"

"You think we came down here just for that?"

Carue shifted nervously below her. Miss Wednesday lightly ran her fingers through the feathers on his crown in an attempt to calm him.

"What? Why are you here, then?" Mr. 9 asked.

"Are you stupid? The Boss sent us. It seems that someone knows his secret, but he doesn't know how much they have learned."

'No, it can't be! We were so careful!' Miss Wednesday thought.

Mr. 5 continued, "Our company's founding principle is 'Everything must be secret'. These persons knew the identity of the Boss, and that cannot be allowed."

"When we carefully investigated, we found that there was someone from a certain country sneaking in Baroque Works," said Miss Valentine.

"W-Wait a minute! Even though I wear a crown, I'm not involved—"

"Oh, we're not referring to you," Miss Valentine nonchalantly dismissed Mr. 9, opting to smile sinisterly in Miss Wednesday's direction.

"The betrayers," began Mr. 5, "are the people who secretly disappeared from Alabasta."

Mr. 5 was interrupted when Mr. 8 seemed to come back to life, jumping up in spite of his injuries.

"Igarappappa!" he roared as he tugged his necktie, dispatching an array of bullets.

"Igaram!" Miss Wednesday screamed.

"You must escape!" Igaram ordered in desperation.

"That's not going to work," Miss Valentine giggled, suddenly appearing to her left. Miss Wednesday barely dodged the kick to her head, but it managed to catch and break her hair clasp, causing her hair to fall in her face. She quickly swung her weapon, forcing Miss Valentine to dance away with a high-pitched giggle. Carue reared and danced back in surprise. Hebi-san managed to remain in place by some miracle, and looking at her prone form caused Miss Wednesday to dismount. They both stood a better chance if they were separated.

"Igaram!" she gasped in horror as his body was seemingly lit up in flame by a powerful blast. He fell to his knees as she ran to his side.

"The two traitors are Igaram, the leader of the Alabasta Royal Guard," Mr. 5 said from the smoke caused by Igaram's failed attack, "and the princess of Alabasta…Nefertari Vivi!"

"You devil!" Vivi hissed.

"Oh! Miss Wednesday is a princess?" Mr. 9 exclaimed as he bowed low.

Vivi groaned, "Stop doing stupid things Mr. 9!"

Mr. 5 idly brushed the soot from his coat and stuck a finger up his nose.

"Boss ordered us to kill the both of you!"

Vivi began to spin her weapon, determined to face him head on. She didn't know how much she could do, but she refused to back down after getting this far.

"Do not underestimate my power!"

"Wait!" Mr. 9 surprised her by jumping in front of her, weapons raised.

"What are you…?" she asked, gaping in shock.

"I don't know what is going on, but because of our long friendship I will help you escape. Please get out of here, Miss Wednesday!"

Vivi could scarcely breathe, much less move, from surprise. She admitted she had grown attached to Mr. 9 in spite of herself, and while he was a reliable partner she never thought he would do this. She felt a familiar burning in her eyes as he charged forward.

"Bye, bye, Baby!" Their silly catch phrase, dreamed up one night long ago when she was bored and homesick and he had had too much to drink, caused her to choke with tears.

"Mr. 9!"

Mr. 5 tilted his head ever so slightly before lifting his hand, forefinger pressed against his thumb as if to flick something aside.

"The most important thing is to accomplish our mission. Your so-called friendship will be your end."

Mr. 9 had nearly reached the other agent and leaped into the air with a shout. Mr. 5 wasted no time.

"Nose Fancy Cannon!"

The resulting explosion was so powerful the ground trembled beneath her feet. Vivi could only watch in horror as Mr. 9 rocketed past her from the force of the blast. She could feel her knees shake as her mind raced for the best possible outcome.

She had no choice.

"Carue!" Vivi jumped up and once more took her place in the saddle. Hebi-san was still slumped over Carue's back and neck, but there was no time to adjust the awkward position.

The Super Spot-Billed Duck pivoted and sped down the narrow streets. It was all Vivi could do not to break down. She couldn't think about Igaram, or Mr. 9. She couldn't think about how everything they have done and sacrificed could all have been for nothing. Mr. 5 and Miss Valentine were in close pursuit.

"Hurry, Carue! There is a ship behind Cactus Mountain!"

"Quack!" he responded, pushing himself just a little faster.

They turned a corner and Carue stumbled a bit upon seeing the obstacle ahead.

"Miss Monday?" Vivi gasped in shock.

"Just go," the woman said, motioning behind her, "there's a ship waiting for you if you can get out of here."

"But…!" Vivi didn't know what to say or where to begin. In an organization where you were not allowed to show your true self, Vivi had never considered it possible to form such strong bonds. Miss Monday was always scolding, or critical, so why…?

"I will stay here to stop them."

'No, they'll be too much for you!' Vivi thought in despair.

"Go!" Miss Monday ordered once more, as she lifted her weapon.

Vivi tapped her heels against Carue's side, urging him past. No choice.

She was so tired of it.

Mr. 5 barely slowed his assault, catching Miss Monday with a fierce clothesline, resulting in another explosion that Vivi felt in her bones. She screamed when the other collapsed to the ground, unmoving.

"I am an explosive man; I can make any part of my body explode! Thanks to the Bomu Bomu no Mi I can accomplish every mission!" Mr. 5 reached up to his nose once more. "You will not be escaping."

'Please…' Vivi didn't even know whom she was praying to.

"Nose Fancy Cannon!"

'Please.'

Despite her prayers, Vivi never expected the swordsman to swoop in and slice the projectile in half, sending the attack off to the side. Carue skidded to a halt.

"Mr. Bushido?" she yelped in wonder.

"Hoh? Who is this guy?" Mr. 5 questioned.

"I have to cut boogers now?" the swordsman shouted in disgust.

Vivi quickly brought up her weapon, unsure of the situation but knowing she couldn't sit there and do nothing.

"Calm down," the swordsman said before she could follow through, "I'm here to help you."

"…Help me?"

"Yeah." He glanced back and gave Carue's other passenger the once over. "Is that your doing?"

"No! I…!"

"Hanley! Now's not the time to be sleeping!"

Hebi-san, Hanley, actually stirred at his voice.

"Shut up, Mr. Zoro."

"So you are the swordsman who destroyed this town," Miss Valentine said.

"Hm? So why is he protecting the princess of Alabasta?" Mr. 5 wondered.

"That is none of your concern," the swordsman replied. "I have my own reasons."

"Nevermind. You still can't compare to us. Another worthless obstacle."

Miss Valentine giggled and said, "That's right, so this obstacle shall be crushed by my power!"

"Zoro!" The kid with the straw hat had apparently awakened, still bloated from his gorging.

"So you've come to help," the swordsman named Zoro said, "that's not really necessary…or did you owe that girl, too?"

"I won't forgive you this time! Let's fight!"

"What?"

'What is going on, now?'

"What the hell are you talking about? I don't understand this at all!"

"Shut up! I will crush your ungrateful self to the ground!"

"Ungrateful?"

"That's right! I won't forgive you! They gave us a warm welcome and brought us good food, but you harm all of those good people?"

"What a moron?" Vivi said, simply in awe of the thought processes that would require him to come to such an erroneous conclusion.

Zoro cleared his throat.

"Luffy, those people are—oi!" He dodged to the side when Luffy's fist shot out and collided with the ground, causing it to crater.

'He's strong, too! Then…was the bounty right?'

"Don't make excuses!" Luffy roared in fury. He threw another punch, demolishing the wall of a fortunately abandoned home.

"Are you trying to kill me?"

"Yes. Just go to hell."

"What?"

Vivi could scarcely believe just how many monsters she was coming across tonight. But this wasn't good at all! If they got too involved with fighting each other that would let Mr. 5 and Miss Valentine have the opening they needed! But she could tell she would only get killed if she tried to stop them…

That's when Vivi remembered the first reason why she went looking for Hanley.

"Hebi-san! Wake up!" she cried as she shook her.

"Nng."

Well, that wasn't promising at all.

"You have to stop them before they injure themselves!"

Hanley slowly lifted her head and looked blearily in her direction. Vivi let out a small yelp when she saw the thin film covering her eyes, making them dull and flat. There was only one cause for that; Vivi once again couldn't believe their terrible luck.

Luffy's enraged shout seemed to bring Hanley back to herself, as she turned her head to where they were brawling.

"What am I doing?" she finally asked, voice croaking.

"It seems he didn't come to fight us, Mr. 5." Miss Valentine noted, causing Vivi to flinch.

"That may be right, Miss Valentine. Anyway, we'd best take care of business as soon as possible."

"I agree."

"Let's go, Miss Valentine!"

"Yes, Mr. 5!"

Vivi jerked the reins back as the two began charging to her. Carue flapped his wings and scrambled to remain upright in an attempt to compensate for Vivi's panic.

Neither expected Luffy's massive form to send the agents flying. They crashed into the far building, sending rubble flying through the air.

"Geez what a moron!" Zoro complained.

They jumped when the building collapsed on itself, sending dust high into the air. VIvi groaned when Miss Valentine emerged from the rubble, parasol open to support her flight.

"I am really angry now! You will all die from my special ability given to me by the Kilo Kilo no Mi! Right now my weight is only one kilogram, so I can jump really high! More than that…!"

Vivi said, "Mr. Bushido, you must get out of here! That woman will—!"

"Shut up," Zoro said, shoulders tense.

"Wha—"

"This is not the time to be worrying about that."

To Vivi's shock, the next person to walk from the dust and debris was the kid, now thin…with an unconscious and bloody Mr. 5 dangling from his right hand.

"Mr. 5! You must be kidding! He's an officer agent of Baroque Works!"

"Phew! All that exercise caused that food to digest," he said, scratching at his belly. He dropped the other man and cracked his knuckles.

"Now, let's get serious."

"Luffy, listen to me. Everyone in this town is a pirate hunter, so they were all our enemies," Zoro said, unconcerned with Miss Valentine yelling for his attention. He idly stepped to the side and avoided her attack as she plummeted to the ground just where he was standing.

"Lies! What kind of enemy would bring us food!" Luffy screamed in defiance.

'He's…so stupid? I don't…how can he be so…No matter!'

"Hebi-san! Hebi-san!" Vivi hissed.

"Why d'you keep wakin' me…?" Hanley slurred.

"Your comrades are fighting! You have to reason with them!"

"Luffy, it seems you won't listen to me," Zoro said as he wrapped a bandana around his head. "You idiot! If you die, don't be sorry!"

"That won't happen!" Luffy snapped. "Rubber!"

"Killing—"

"Bazooka!""Swords!"

They came together almost faster than she could follow, clashing with a great burst of energy. They grappled for a moment before pushing each other away, crashing into more buildings and causing more collateral damage. Vivi shrieked as Carue had to dance out of the way of a flying piece of rock.

"It's so noisy…" Hanley complained.

"This is no time for sleep!" Vivi retorted, shaking her.

The brief respite didn't last long, as those two attacked each other again. They were all going to get caught up in it if she didn't do something fast. There was no guarantee Carue could get through that mess unscathed.

"I know that sedative harmed you, and you don't feel well, but Zoro and Luffy are going to kill each other if someone doesn't stop them!"

"Zoro and… … …Luffy?" Hanley's head dropped once more, and for a moment Vivi thought she had passed out once more, but Hanley pushed herself up and back, slowly sliding off Carue's back.

"Wait here a sec. Seems I won't get any peace otherwise," she muttered as she stumbled towards the free-for-all.

Vivi wondered if this was a good idea.

"Ugh, damn it! We were completely beaten up!" Mr. 5 said as he pushed himself into a sitting position. "This will bring shame upon the officer agents of Baroque Works!"

"You're right, Mr. 5, we have to show them our real power!" Miss Valentine agreed, her features distorted from rage. They both jumped when Hanley stumbled past them, muttering under her breath about husbands and their questionable usefulness.

Vivi cursed, "Hebi-san, look out!"

"Do you think?" Mr. 5 began, standing.

Miss Valentine raised her parasol.

"Yes, good idea!"

Mr. 5 reared back to release a punch, but Hanley, was already moving to intercept him. A kick to the jaw sent him flying into the distance.

"Wha—" Miss Valentine was given little chance to retaliate, as she was thrown away with a sharp punch to the face.

"Shut up and die," Hanley growled.

'Is the entire crew filled with monsters?'

"Hey!" Hanley shouted, placing her hands on her hips; the effect wasn't quite as intimidating as she was still swaying slightly.

They ignored her.

"HEY!"

"Shut up!" Zoro and Luffy shouted, distracted.

"…What did you say to me?"

"Oh good."

Vivi turned in surprise as the red-haired navigator (the name escaped her) approached to stand beside her.

"Good?" Vivi asked.

"I thought I was going to have to get involved but she'll take care of it. Did something happen, however?"

"I don't even know where to begin."

"How dare you…" Hanley hissed, face unmoving and quite intimidating with the lack of blinking due to the material covering her eyes. "MONKEY. D. LUFFY!"

The effect was instantaneous.

Luffy squawked before stumbling and falling to the ground as he tried to abort his attack. It was also enough for Zoro to pause his attack as well, seeing as his opponent suddenly had something else to contend with.

"DID YOU JUST TELL ME TO SHUT UP?"
"…I didn't mean…do I have to answer that—"

"—AND WHY THE HELL WERE YOU TWO FIGHTING? HERE I AM, SICK AS A DOG, BUT YOU'RE MORE CONCERNED WITH BEATING THE SHIT OUT OF EACH OTHER—"

"Ow! Why the hell did you punch me?" Zoro protested.

"For being a bad influence!"

"So!" the girl said brightly, "I just got an interesting proposition."

'How is this my life?'

***to be continued...