He stares at his bed. He sees the creature. White. Furry.

Its nose twitches.

"What the hell is—"

"CHAPPY!!"

He expects to turn around and see his soulless body on the ground. No such luck. "Dammit! Are you trying to scare the crap out of me!?"

"I REPEAT. CHAPPY!!" She stomps on his back and leaps over. She is cuddling the furry animal in mere seconds.

He gawks as she proceeds to stroke its ears and coo nonsensical adjectives.

He blinks. "There's a woodland creature on my bed!"

"So. Cute!"

"No! Not cute! Dirty and probably stained with—"

She turns around. Her eyes are shining with a tint of red. "Continue, and mutilation."

"—gumdrops and rainbow sprinkles!"

She huffs. She spins back around to blatantly adore the rodent.

He grumbles to himself.

She picks up the furry. She touches her nose to its.

Somehow, the entire scene feels like its shining because she is smiling brightly like sunlight through forest crown canopies, and his lungs are filled with better air.

But he snaps to remember that this is his room and that is his bed. He leaps up. "Where the hell did that thing come from!?"

She looks at him. Frowning. "Chappy is not a 'thing'! He's a wonderful, adorable, fluffy—"

"I don't care if its king of the goddamn moon! I just want to know where and how you got it and if it's too late to return to whence it came!"

She huffs. "Ignorant fool. Obviously Chappy came from the land of Joy and Unrelenting Justice—"

"Stop making up crap and tell me where you bought it!"

She stares at him. "I didn't buy Chappy."

"What!? Then how'd—(wham!) ACKK!!"

"Rukia-chan!" Isshin bellows as he heels dig into his son's back, "My beautiful daughter! Do you like the gift I got you!?"

"Were you the one who got Chappy? Thank you so much, Kurosaki-san!"

"Anything to see that breathtaking smile of yours, my wondrous daughter! And please, call me Daddy!!"

She smiles. Like to a child who just mastered potty training. "Alright then. Thank you, otou-san."

Isshin's eyes produce waterfalls. "Today is a glorious day of epic proportions! If only I had recorded this moment so as to be able to relive it every day! Please, call me dad again!"

She smiles brightly. "Sorry, only once per Chappy."

"Then I shall purchase dozens of Chappy before the day is gone—"

"Like hell you will!" He pushes off and tries to break the older man's face with his foot.

"Ichigo, my retarded son, why are you impeding my efforts to please my nature-loving daughter!?"

"I'm not going to let you fill the house with rodents just because you're out of your mind!"

"Well, Ichigo, my disappointing son, if you would only take lessons from that furry creature over there and give me grandchildren already, perhaps I will consider—"

He thinks the heat from his face is mostly rage. "Dammit, you old idiot! Stop saying things like that!"

Isshin dodges another punch. "As such, I can only fill the void of my future grandchildren by lowering the standards and substitute with the cuteness of the fluffies! And at least Rukia-chan will still call me dad!"

"Wha—that rodent is not my son!"

"Hey!" She gasps, "What's wrong with Chappy!?"

Isshin laughs and charges down the stairs. "Wait for me, Rukia-chan! I will be back with Ichigo juniors before you know it!"

He gives chase. "Not if I snap your spine like a twig, you old fart!!"

"Hey, Ichigo! Get back here and take back what you said about Chappy, you irresponsible parent!" She gives chase too.

The rabbit watches the open door. The sounds of stomping and yelling fade.

It scratches its ears. It blinks. Its nose twitches.

It hops onto the pillow. Soon, it naps.

The closet creaks open. Kon pokes his head out. Tears stream down his face. "I'm being replaced. Nee-san, nooooooooo…………"