This chapter was very difficult to write. My wife (bless her) helped me get through a few drafts so that this would at least be legible.  That said, I honestly don't know what y'all are gonna think. Are Chuck and Sarah written even remotely in character? Well, my take on them is only one possible interpretation. You may like it. You may despise it. I will say that I am very thankful that I do not own these characters. Way too much responsibility. I have enough difficulty being responsible for myself. BTW, I changed the rating to teen due to some profanity.

As always, thanks for reading, and for reviewing!

All right, here we go.

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Sarah and Chuck made their way back to her temporary apartment.

After seeing that he was sitting comfortably, and tending to his bruises, Sarah swept the room for surveillance as she did everyday. Satisfied that they were clear, she made them coffee, and prepared pasta and greens for dinner.

She would periodically meet his eyes. His expression was nervous and expectant.

She was terrified but resolved.

Though he wanted to start immediately, she required that they eat first.

After that, she sat on the couch next to him.

He began. "I appreciate you finally agreeing to talk to me, Sarah. I want to get past this so bad. I think-"

"Chuck," she held up her right hand in a stopping gesture. Once he had done so, she said, "I'm sorry, but you have a habit of talking a bit too much sometimes. If we're doing this, I'm going to need to be the one to speak for awhile, and I need you to not interrupt me. You know... how hard it is for me to do this kind of thing. I am going to be struggling here. I'm probably going to say some things you will not like. I will give you a chance to respond when I'm done, but if we're going to talk, I'm going to need your help getting through this. Are you OK with that?"

Though he appeared anxious, he agreed.

"All right." Sarah took a deep breath. "Thank you. The reason I haven't been willing to discuss this before now is I've been trying to figure out over the past few days how to say it."

Even though he didn't voice it, there was a question in his eyes. She tried to answer what she thought he would ask. "But I still haven't figured out exactly how to do it."

Chuck answered with a smile of reassurance. Sarah had mixed feelings about that. He was already being sweet, and that just made it harder for her to say the things she knew would hurt him.

But they had to be said.

"Chuck, since the day I first met you, you've shown me that you're one of the most selfless people I've ever met. The first time was when you helped out that little ballerina. You've been like that, constantly. Risking your life for your sister, for Morgan…" She was about to say another word, but then stopped, turning her eyes away from him momentarily. "You've gone so far above and beyond what's been asked of you for this country, and you never think of your own safety in doing it. Well, even if you do think of it, you never let that get in your way. Though I really wish you would sometimes."

"So selfless," these last words were so soft as to almost be a whisper, "except for me."

Chuck sat there in utter shock. Then he sputtered, "Wait. Hold it-"

"Chuck," Sarah said.

"How can you-"

"Chuck."

"I've saved your life more than once. I've tried to support you! I-"

"CHUCK!"

Her yell brought him back into silence.

She said, "You agreed."

His expression was mutinous, but he made a gesture for her to continue.

She knew holding back wasn't going to be easy for him. It wasn't even realistic. This was Chuck. How could she honestly expect him to just sit there and take it without defending himself? But every word coming from her was a struggle, when her natural response would be to lie or to flee.

Well, she had tried running. Beckman had removed that as an option. And now, Sarah was finding herself not wanting to run. So the only choice she had was to talk to him. But every look from him was making it harder. Sarah felt almost nauseous. She pushed on.

"I know you've saved my life. And Casey's. And yes, you've been a support to me. I'm not denying that." She took another breath. "But ultimately, Chuck, when it comes to me, you've been very selfish."

He kept his mouth closed, but she could almost hear his teeth grinding. She continued.

"While I haven't always been one hundred percent honest, I've tried my best to be straight with you about our relationship from the beginning. I've told you that it couldn't work, and why. And you kept pursuing me in spite of that. And every time I had to reject you, you treated me like I had betrayed you, like I had the gall to treat my job to protect you as more important than the feelings you had for me. Never mind that fact that my work has been my whole life. Never mind that for me to enter a relationship with you would be a breach of ethics that would endanger you and me. You never understood that, because for you, love or whatever feelings you've had, is the end all be all. That's why your feelings about Bryce, Jill, and Stanford kept you paralyzed for five years."

The look he gave her now was as if she had been the one to punch him this time. She didn't want to hurt him bringing up that awful chapter in his life. She really didn't, but it was necessary for him to understand what was going on with her; what he was doing to make her feel this way. Sarah kept telling herself that. She forced herself to keep talking.

"So, it's always been easy from your perspective to say that our feelings come before everything else, and to accuse me of being an emotionless robot because I wouldn't do the same. You never considered the cost to me. Never."

His silent stare spoke volumes to her. Who was she to talk? She was being a selfish bitch, and hurting him. She couldn't believe how he was making her feel, just with his eyes. It was completely unfair. She was making the accusations, and he was still making her feel like shit!

She remembered every sad, disappointed reaction of his. How she had told him "No," over and over, wanting to say "Yes." And she had taken it all on.

Until Ellie's wedding night, and what he had done to himself. To her. Sarah's fingernails were biting into her hands. Anger and grief were winning again. She was losing control.

Sarah began raising her voice without realizing it. "And, y'know what, Chuck? In spite of it all; in spite of you never staying in the car, not listening to me or Casey; in spite of the way you could hurt me so often; in spite of the fact that it's entirely against your interest and mine, I FELL FOR YOU, ANYWAY!" She was angrily wiping her eyes. "And I didn't just fall for you. No, no, no. I fell for everything you wanted. You constantly talking about your normal life. I started wanting that! I wanted it with you! And I was going to give up everything I've ever known so I could have that with you. And then you just... you just FUCKED IT ALL UP!!!" She was sobbing, now. She could barely make out his features through the tears.

Chuck stared at Sarah in shock. It wasn't just the sudden uncharacteristic explosion of emotion. It wasn't just the confession of her feelings so long unsaid. It was the realization of what she was saying, of what she had wanted, and what he had taken from her.

His mouth dropped open.

"Oh..... God," he moaned.

She couldn't stop crying. The dam was broken.

"Oh God. Sarah.... Oh God, I didn't- I didn't know!" But the moment he said that, Bryce's last words came crashing into Chuck's mind. Sarah was going to stay. Had Chuck not believed him, because it was Bryce talking, or because those words had just seemed so beyond the realm of possibility? Or had the horror of Bryce's passing wiped those words from Chuck's mind? One way or the other, he had dismissed what Bryce had said. Entirely. "Oh God," he whispered.

He watched Sarah cry. He wondered if he should put his arms around her, try to comfort her, but would she push him away, or hit him if he tried? He decided it hardly mattered. He wasn't going to let her go through this pain without at least trying. He tentatively reached out with his hands. Fortunately, he didn't have to reach too far. The second he touched her, she pushed herself into his body, clutching on to him, her face and tears pressed against his chest.

For minutes, they sat. He gently stroked her back. He fought back the urge to kiss her forehead, fearing that would be too much. Gradually, her breathing came under control, the tears began to subside. He felt her relax into him.

It was still some time before Chuck felt it was safe to speak. That had given him enough time to figure out what to do. The solution was obvious after all. He spoke softly to her. "I'm going to fix this, Sarah. I'll work with Dad; we'll get it taken out."

Sarah breathed in his touch, his words. Gradually, she was finding her pain subsiding to be replaced by a feeling of clarity. He would do what he said. He wouldn't stop until he had achieved it, no matter the consequences. He would do this for her.

She slowly pulled away from him. Not far. Her hands were still holding his sides. Her eyes met his. For the first time in awhile, she felt calm.

"No." She shook her head. "You can't remove the Intersect, Chuck. You need to promise me you won't do that."

Now, he was utterly confused. "I don't… I thought you wanted…" Chuck was at a loss. He thought about what he had wanted to say. What she knew. Oh Hell, it wasn't as if finally saying it was going to make things that much worse than they already were. "But I love you. I want to be with you. Nothing is more important than that!"

He saw her face soften as he said the words, but she shook her head. "You're wrong. There is something more important, and you know it."

Chuck whispered, "What do I know?"

Sarah responded, "Why did you upload the Intersect?"

Shaking his head, he said, "I don't... I don't know."

She said, "You do. And you didn't do it because of me." Though the words sounded accusatory, the tone was not. He looked at her face. There was only support there, now.

Patiently, she said, "You did it because it had to be done. It was the right thing to do."

Chuck felt abashed, and replied, "When I said that, I didn't mean it. I was just trying to come up with some kind of answer to my father."

Sarah shook her head and smiled. "You did mean it. Even if you didn't realize it, even if you don't realize it now, that's why you did it. Because you know what has to be done, and you do what has to be done and what's right. You may not know it in your head, but you know it where it counts."

Chuck looked at her with disbelief. The turn in her attitude; where had it come from? He wasn't following that shift, or her reasoning. "How do you know that?"

She placed her forehead on his chest and said, "It may not seem like it, but I know you pretty well. Well, except for the part where I thought you really wanted to be normal."

Chuck absently let his fingers stroke her hair while he replied. "I understand that. I thought I knew you pretty well, except for the part where I didn't realize you wanted to be normal." He frowned for a moment. "Maybe 'normal' is the whole problem. It just screws everything up."

He felt her laugh lightly against him. She said, "Yeah, maybe it does."

He paused, then said, "I am so sorry, Sarah. I am just…" He was having difficulty talking.

She pulled her face away from his body, only to pull his face down toward her so their foreheads were touching.

"I know," she said. "I'm sorry I was so awful to you."

Chuck smiled. "You were due. You were holding that in for awhile. Are you feeling better now?"

She returned his smile. "I am. I don't want to do that again anytime soon, but yeah, I feel a lot better for getting it out of my system." She paused and then added, "It does make me feel good knowing that you'd be willing to give up the Intersect for me."

Chuck said, "That offer's always good, you know. Anytime you want me to quit. If I can quit…"

She said, "I know. Thank you."

He took a deep breath, preparing for the next part. "So, what now? Are we friends, again? Do you need me to give you more space? I meant it when I said that I could try to talk to Beckman. I don't want to force you to stay here." He pulled back so he could fully look into her eyes. "I'll do whatever you want."

She matched his gaze and nodded. "I want... to be with you. I want to give the real thing a try."

Chuck smiled, but still felt uncertain.

Sarah's face took on a determined edge. She said, "I want to make this clear so you know where I'm coming from. I am not doing this because Beckman ordered me to stay. I am not doing this as a means to make you keep the Intersect. I am not doing this to get you to better follow my directions when we're on missions, or for any other reason, than that I want to be with you. I have lied to you before, and I can't promise I'm not going to lie about some things in the future." She caressed his cheeks with her hands. "I am not lying about this. Do you believe me?"

Chuck smiled widely, his uncertainty gone. "Yes."

Slowly, they moved forward, letting their foreheads rest together against each other once more.

Chuck said, "This isn't going to stop us from having problems."

Sarah said, "Believe me, I know."

Chuck said, "And I'm not going to be able to give you the 'normal' you were hoping for. I'll do the best I can though."

She said, "That sounds nice. Between missions we'll have nice family dinners with Ellie and Devon." Sarah leaned in and kissed Chuck.

When she broke the kiss, he said, "We'll play board games like Life, Trivial Pursuit, Monopoly…" He kissed her back.

After a moment she said, "Mmmm, I don't like Monopoly. How about Parcheesi?"

Chuck said, "Mm-hmmmmm" into her lips. Then he said, "Movie nights with pizza and popcorn."

"Cuddling."

"Making out on the couch..."

They didn't talk for awhile after that.

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Hello? Anybody still with me? Well, if you are, thanks for sticking around! Assuming that my profile is not burned in effigy after this, I plan to continue. However, this chapter officially ends "Chuck Vs. the Postcard" or "Part One". After a short break, the story shall pick up with our heroes returning to Burbank and various plot threads to explore. I've just gotta figure out the title for "Part Two".