Okay, since I was cursed with the white-clad thief and his…friend…detective, here's my little e-mail piece. Thanks to: Zeodyme Delacross for bringing me in on this. Special thanks to: kaitiesparks, s2lou, 66ButterflyOfDarkness99, and of course DireSphinx, who started the whole thing. I give you your credit. Enjoy!
Disclaimer: Obviously I don't own it since I'm wasting my time writing fan fiction.
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It was a normal afternoon. I came in from taking my little brother down to the park, fixed supper, and sat down at the computer to check my e-mail. It was about 8 p.m. central when my slow ass dial-up finally loaded. I sighed. I was totally getting wireless internet as soon as possible.
As the welcome screen came up, I heard, "Welcome. You've got mail," in a male's voice. I scoffed. One e-mail. Boy, I wasn't going to be on very long. I clicked the little mail box at the top of the screen and perked up a bit. The e-mail was from my friend, M-chan. A smile slowly spread over my face as I double-clicked on the e-mail and it opened.
There was a soft poof as a white cloud appeared. I frowned, thinking, What the hell has she sent me now? It didn't stop there, though. Soon enough a figure came tiptoeing onto the screen. I recognized him immediately as Conan. And tiptoeing behind him was Kaitou Kid. I raised a brow, wondering exactly how long it would take them to realize I was looking down at them. I knew they couldn't be in my computer because of fan fiction, because I didn't have any…at the present moment, anyhow.
I let out a low, long whistle, making them both jump and turn to look at me. I grinned and waved at the screen. Kaitou groaned and shook his head. "Where did that crazy fangirl send us?"
Conan shushed him and waved slightly. He looked pissed about something. "Can you tell us how we got here?"
I nodded. "Sure. You were sent here in an e-mail. From a friend of mine, might I add."
The detective looked over at Kaitou and narrowed his eyes. "See? I told you that's what we hopped into."
Kaitou was a bit more panicked. "Zeodyme Delacross is a friend of yours?" When I nodded, he tried to walk off the screen.
I cocked a brow, remembering something from another fic, and moved my mouse over Kaitou then clicked on him, picking him up and dropping him on his ass. "You're not going anywhere until you tell me why you're here. I don't have any fan fiction with you in it." I repressed tagging yet onto that.
"That psychotic friend of yours threw us in an e-mail!"
I scoffed. "Yeah, if I remember right, you're the one who jumped into it and drug your detective friend along with you."
Conan looked at me over his glasses. "Friend isn't the right word."
I sighed, mentally cursing M-chan for the entire thing. She would totally owe me after this one. Those two would drive a crazy person to sanity. "You two sure do seem to be getting along pretty damn well right now, considering what's happened. I'm beginning to think that she's right to think you've got something going on that we don't know about."
Conan began sputtering at that, so flustered that he fell backwards. Kaitou, who was still sitting where I'd left him, had this adorable WTF? look on his face. I knew when he figured out what I was talking about because I could see the comprehension dawn on him. His face turned red and he stood up, pacing and screaming incoherent run-on sentences.
He's worse than I am, in Spazz Mode, I thought, grinning.
Kaitou suddenly stopped his ranting and both he and Conan looked at me. "Spazz Mode?" they both asked.
I groaned. "Never mind." I had forgotten they could read minds. I smiled. One, two, three, four, five…
Conan looked a bit miffed that he couldn't hear anything but counting anymore, but he smiled and clapped anyhow. "Good idea."
The Kid shook his head. "Not. Fair."
I laughed, and clicked on Kaitou, making him float in the air on the computer screen. "I hate it for you, Kid. Life isn't fair. Just because I outsmarted you, don't throw a temper tantrum. I get enough of that on a daily basis." After that, I let him down.
The detective laughed at that. "Him not throw a temper tantrum? That'll be the day."
Kaitou stomped his foot and growled. "Enough, you. I'm not going to swallow anymore of your abuse."
"Deal with it. You're the one that got us in this position to begin with!"
I let out a frustrated sound and yelled, "Enough, both of you! I swear if you two don't knock it off, I'm gonna tie you up up-side-down and throw you to a bunch of children with baseball bats as I scream 'Piñata!'"
Kaitou turned a ghostly pale color and swayed where he was standing. I thought for half a second that he was going to just fall over. Conan, on the other hand, wasn't so easily deterred. "That'll only work for him. Don't think you can throw me off that easily."
Before I had the chance to say anything, the detective minimized my internet screen, showing my background of Sephiroth, Zack, and Cloud from the Crisis Core days of FFVII. Conan turned back to me after seeing that, and I just tipped my head to one side, my face a mask of innocence. He rolled his eyes and went back to what he was doing, opening file after file. I knew what he was looking for, but he wasn't going to find it. All my fics were saved on a disk, so there were no copies on the computer's hard drive. He was just screwed where that was concerned.
All the while, the Kid was watching him with mild amusement with a hint of curiosity. I was sure that was because I hadn't tried to stop the detective yet. I hadn't planned on it really, until he opened my pictures file. My mental counting stopped for only a second and Conan jumped right on it.
"Uh-huh. I wonder what's in here."
I gulped, but didn't say anything. It'd still be okay, as long as he didn't open a certain folder. Ninety-eight, ninety-nine, one hundred… Kaitou, who had suddenly become interested in what the detective was doing, walked over to the window of picture files.
"Hey," he said, pointing to one at random, "open that one."
I shrieked. "No! Not that one. Don't. You. Dare."
Conan grinned a bit. "Why not?" he asked as he opened the main folder.
I shook my head. Still a chance. The main folder divided into two mini-folders. One was DeathNote and the other was Hellsing. Of course, Conan went straight for the DeathNote folder.
I squeaked. "I wouldn't, if I was you. You'll regret it."
Kaitou grinned mischievously. "Yeah, sure we will."
"I mean it, Conan. Remember who my friend is. Do. Not. Open. That. Folder."
Conan crossed his arms over his chest. "And what'll happen if I do?"
Kaitou slumped a bit and whispered something that sounded like, "Piñata."
I shook my head, a smirk forming. "Oh, no, no, no. I'll do something worse to you than that. I promise, if you open that folder, I will do the very worst thing I can think of."
The Kid froze dead on the spot. My smirk grew because, for once, I knew what he was thinking. However, no, I wasn't going to use his fear against him. What good would that be against Conan? No, as I'd said it was the worst thing I could think of.
As neither of them had said anything, I spoke up again. "If you don't wanna find out, I suggest you run off my screen right now. Or you'll find out whether you wanna or not."
The detective raised a brow. "Really?" he asked, inching towards the folder again.
I let out a slow breath. "Don't think I won't click on your asses and drag you both into an e-mail then send you off to who knows where."
Kaitou's jaw dropped. "You wouldn't do that."
I grinned and maximized my internet screen, then loaded an empty e-mail. "Oh, but I would, and for that matter, instead of sending you off to nowhere, I'll just send you both back to Zeodyme and let her play with you some more."
That got the response I wanted. They both turned white as sheets-- making it hard to tell Kaitou apart from his outfit-- and screamed. There was a loud poof then they were gone. I sighed, relieved, and double-clicked the DeathNote folder, making an enlarged picture of L and Light in a very suggestive position on the floor, while handcuffed together, appear. I grinned. I'm a very tolerant and easy-going person. I saw no reason to torture those two any more after what they'd already been through. The threat to send them to M-chan was a bluff. I snickered.
As if I would do such a thing, I caught myself thinking. Too bad they weren't around to hear that thought.
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See? I'm not as mean as everyone thinks I am…maybe. I give cookies for reviews.