Note: Half humor, half something almost scandalous by my standards. Enjoy this piece because it probably won't get any more indecent than this. Also, I wrote this while watching Star Trek Generations (which is a brilliant movie, by the way). Thanks for all your kind comments on my other stories.

Standard disclaimers apply.

Barfly Memoir ---

"You know, I touched her tits once."

The drinking glass in Spock's hand slammed down onto the table loudly. Of all the things that Jim Kirk could have said to start a conversation, that was definitely not at the top of the 'appropriate comments' list. The noise slowed the flow of conversation in the mess hall only for a moment before the captain and his first officer had their privacy again.

"Oh don't overreact," Jim frowned. "It wasn't what you're thinking. It was in a bar."

"I fail to see the positive aspects of this story," Spock replied.

"It was the night before I joined Starfleet. We were in a bar in Iowa and she was standing there in that little red uniform dress... Yeah, you know the one."

"Jim," he said in warning.

"Don't give me that look," Jim said before taking a long draw from his beer. "It's all history."

"Unimportant details," Spock added. "I asked how you came to the decision to join the Academy, not how you physically violated the Lieutenant in a bar."

"I'm getting to that."

"Indeed."

"Anyway, we were in this bar and she flat out rejected me. Why? I'm not sure why. But then these cadets surrounded me and I don't really remember who threw the first punch."

"Insight into your wayward methods of persuasion would suggest that you coerced the initial blow."

"Yeah, he hit me first."

"Of course."

"So after a few good moves, one of those thugs sent me flying back into your woman. I only reached out to steady myself. My hands just happened to grab onto the wrong thing. Or things. She's got a great set, you know?"

Spock's face remained blank as his friend relived the memory in his head. If it were possible, he would have taken the chance to jolt the cockiness out of Jim Kirk's attitude, but regulation 548 stated beating one's captain senseless was against Starfleet policy. Luckily there was no rule against thinking such things.

"I do not understand how this is relevant to my query."

"Well after she shoved me back into the fight I got the piss knocked out of me. When I woke up a bit later I was having a beer and a recruiting talk with Admiral Pike the night before the ship left for the Academy. Of course that was back when he was still the captain."

"Hopefully he was as disappointed by your actions as I find myself to be right now."

"Spock, you need to live a little! Haven't you ever wanted to toss back a few drinks and enjoy life? Have you even been to a bar?"

The Vulcan sat motionless across the table from his very human friend. He knew that there was no point in answering the question, as Jim knew the answer without having to ask. Perhaps the better query would have been 'Did you ever find yourself wanting to go to a bar?' Not that the answer would have been any different, but perhaps it would have been a bit more thorough.

"One of these days that woman of yours is gonna teach you a few things about letting loose," Jim nodded. "I can't wait for that day."

"I am afraid you will have to," Spock replied.

"Speaking of Uhura, why aren't you loitering around her quarters tonight?"

"It is still early in the afternoon," he answered. "I will join her when we have finished here."

Jim tossed back the rest of his beer in a few quick gulps. He took Spock's glass and tossed down the rest of whatever non-alcoholic beverage his friend had been nursing as well. In a matter of moments their brief get-together was over.

"Well you don't keep a beautiful woman waiting while you have a beer with your buddies," Jim advised.

"Sound logic from an experienced drinker," Spock supposed.

"Once you learn, you never make that mistake twice," Jim grinned. "Well, unless you're me."

---

The door to Uhura's quarters slid open with a quiet whoosh. She had been expecting her Vulcan lover to make an entrance at some point in the afternoon, but it was still early even by his standards. She was glad to see him regardless, and let the happiness show on her face as she greeted him.

"Get sick of putting up with the captain already?"

Her hands reached up to his face, pulling it down for a lingering kiss. His idle hands found their way to her back, holding her in a light, affectionate embrace that was only broken when he decided to answer her question in a very roundabout manner.

"Our conversation this afternoon was most informative."

"Tell me all about it," she said.

They settled down together into her favorite reading chair. She sat across his lap with her feet dangling off the arm of the chair. Her hands played with the fine hairs at the nape of his neck. She knew the feeling was soothing to him and the touch helped to strengthen their physical bond. Not to mention the fact that she loved his hair.

"Jim recounted the memory of his initial recruitment into Starfleet."

"Oh? Which version did you hear, because I know of at least three. And none of them are true."

"He related an account of a fight in a bar in Iowa the night before the transport ship left for the Academy in San Francisco."

At that statement her hands stilled their motions. She remembered the exact bar fight he was talking about. That memory was oddly enough a fond one for her given the history that she shared with the man that redefined what it meant to captain a starship.

"He… claims that he touched you inappropriately in the midst of this altercation."

Uhura barked out a laugh at the curious statement. She remembered that moment in the fight very clearly. When he had been shoved in her general direction, he had reached out to stop himself from falling. In a manner of speaking he had succeeded.

"Well if it makes you feel any better, I threw him back into the fight," she laughed.

"So it is true."

"Yeah, he got his hands on the girls."

Spock looked very perturbed at this, not quite sure whether to act on his apprehensions, or remain seated and ignore his feelings on the matter. He knew Jim Kirk was a womanizer, but he never thought that he would have to hear a story that recounted his friend's actions in such a way that affected him so personally.

"Oh don't look so offended," she said. "That was a long time ago and it means less to me now than it did then."

"I believe his priorities in life have drastically changed over the years, but he still retains the roguish nature of a growing adolescent."

"Well he isn't the only man that's ever gotten a hold of these," Uhura chuckled into his ear. She playfully nipped at his earlobe.

"That sounds somewhat ambiguous," Spock replied.

"Maybe," she agreed. "But you're the only one that's ever had me begging for more."

"That is… much less ambiguous."

She 'mhmm'ed into his neck as she began a dangerous trek of kisses toward the spots that she knew he liked best. In her mind she already saw the sleepy expression on his face. The half-lidded eyes that weren't sure if they wanted to stay open and watch, or close and savor the feelings.

She took it as a sign that he was feeling overly amenable to her affections when his hands reached up to free her hair from the hastily-tied band. His fingers buried themselves in her locks, reaching deeper to massage her scalp gently. He used the leverage to pull her closer, to give her reason to enhance her attentions to the delicate skin of his neck.

"…you didn't have a few drinks with Kirk in the mess hall, did you?"

"No, why?"

"Nothing, you just seem a bit more interested in taking the lead."

"Occasionally I must satisfy the primal need to physically assert myself," he explained as his hands crept downward. They passed over her arms, squeezing affectionately in their trek south. Eventually they settled on her hips.

"What do you want?" she asked, pausing inches away from his lips.

"It is not about what I want," he whispered. "This is about what I need."

A shudder worked its way down Uhura's spine at the words. In all of the time she had spent in the privacy of Spock's company, never had she felt more desired than in that moment. The darkness in his eyes was intense to the point of being scary. His gaze warmed her body, sending a familiar feeling of heat straight to her very center.

"And what do you need?"

"This," he answered roughly.

He attacked her lips with a ferocity that was almost animalistic. The emotions that bundled themselves up inside of the half-Vulcan were bubbling just under the surface, threatening to spill over into something potentially explosive. He was already contorting her body into a more physically advantageous position in his lap, with both of her legs straddling his hips provocatively. His hands were already busy working their way back up, taking the thin, red shirt with them.

"James Kirk will never touch you like that again," he stated.

"You won't let him." It was not a question.

Spock stared deeply into her eyes, searching for understanding. He needed to know that she recognized the seriousness of what he was telling her. The body in front of him was for no one else. As long as she acknowledged their bond, she was accepting the unspoken terms of their unusual relationship.

A curt nod told him everything he needed to know.

A short time later Uhura lay still against Spock's chest. They were still entangled together in their chair, naked and contented in the aftermath. His hands were at rest on her hips, holding her possessively. His thumb moved back and forth idly as his thoughts carried him back to the memory of moments before.

"I cannot apologize for my actions," he said. "Did I frighten you?"

"No."

"Nyota, I… There was a time when I considered permanently negating emotion," he said softly. "Now, here with you, I cannot imagine ever living a life without it."

She lifted her head to look at him with questioning eyes. Those words were not something she expected to hear coming from him. Not even after the rough bout she had just endured at the hands of an impassioned Vulcan.

"That means a lot to me," she replied. "I'm not quite sure what else to say."

"Then say nothing."

She arched her back a bit to relieve the stiffness. She could already feel the ache in even the tiniest movements. Although it was one of the most erotic moments of her life, she wasn't sure that she could get through the day without the smallest annoyance at the discomfort she would have to bear.

"You're going to owe me a massage," she warned. "A long one."

"Anything," he agreed.

"Don't be so quick to agree," she grinned. "I'm can be pretty difficult to satisfy."

"Experience tells me that I have very little to worry about where your pleasure is concerned," he said with a small quirk of his lips.

"You know, I think humanity is rubbing off on you."

"Yes, I do believe you may be right."

Fin ---

Note: Again, the 'H' key giving me hella issues. Sorries. If'n you wants, go read the other stuff on the author's page. Thanks to all of you who review. You keep me writing :D

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