The Prom
"So you all set for your prom date?" John teased Cameron. "Morris can't stop talking about it." He grinned across the breakfast table at the girl as he ate his pancakes.
"You're going to the prom?" Sarah asked, uncertain whether this was a good idea or not.
"Yes, John told me I should," Cameron replied.
"Morris is your friend?" Sarah asked her son.
"Yeah, and he's totally crushing on Cameron." John couldn't help smiling again.
"He was helpful to us so John thinks I should go to the prom with him." Cameron said, looking at Sarah as she sipped her coffee.
"And of course you follow John's orders." Sarah nodded, joining in with John's amusement.
She added after a moment, "Helpful how?"
John shot a warning look at Cameron. If Sarah heard about Cromartie's visit to their school trying to find him, she would want to move them in the time it would take to pack a bag. He tried to remind her to keep quiet about it with a glare.
"He helped with the computer parts," John said quickly, "you know, the extra processors we needed to access Vick's chip." Sarah wasn't to know that it wasn't Morris who helped them.
"Hmm," Sarah grunted, finishing off her breakfast and heading to the sink to deposit her plate. "We'll have to have a chat about your date a bit closer to the time Cameron," she said, giving the girl a look. "Make sure you behave yourself."
Sarah and John exchanged another smile.
"Yes, I will look forward to your advice," Cameron said seriously looking at Sarah.
"Sarah Connor, I need to ask you about kissing," Cameron said the following evening.
Sarah looked up from the shotgun she was cleaning at the kitchen table. John was in his room doing his homework, the young terminator standing next to her with a determined look on her face.
"Kissing?"
"Yes, I know what it is and the reasons for it, but I am unsure about the practicalities."
"The practicalities? You mean how you do it? You want me to tell you how to kiss?" Sarah gave Cameron a disbelieving look.
"Forget it girlie, you can figure it out for yourself, like the rest of us had to."
Cameron was silent for a moment.
"It cannot be that hard to accomplish, but I was hoping to avoid any potential damage to Morris as he is John's friend."
Sarah looked at her, noticing that for almost the first time, she looked uncertain of her chances of success about something.
"I will ask John for practical advice," she said, turning around to leave the room.
"Hold it right there," Sarah called quickly. "There will be no kissing lessons between you and John," she said firmly.
"But you have refused to help me, and I am in need of assistance." Cameron said logically.
Sarah sighed. Living with a terminator certainly was never dull.
"Alright, come here," she sighed, "I'll help you."
Cameron gave her a small quick smile that Sarah found quite worryingly human. She sat down opposite Sarah at the table as Sarah put away the various parts of the gun she was working on and faced the attentive terminator.
"So, you know a bit about kissing already, right?" She began.
"Yes," Cameron said. "A kiss can have several meanings. It can be a greeting, it might be a familial kiss, such as you and John sometimes share. However, it is romantic kissing I am uncertain about. I have the data in my memory banks, but I do not fully comprehend the practicalities. People kiss to express sexual desire for each other, do they not?"
"Yes, a kiss is a very important part of the bonding process for a couple," Sarah explained carefully. "It's a way of telling someone you care for them, that you find them attractive."
Cameron nodded, considering.
"How much pressure do you apply when kissing?" She asked suddenly.
"Pressure? Well, it's hard to say, sometimes kisses are quick, light. Sometimes they might be more …passionate, harder."
"And how do you know what sort of kiss it will be when planning your strategy?"
Sarah laughed. "Kissing isn't like a battle Cameron. You don't always plan it in advance."
"I would need to," She said quickly. "I do not have human instincts to rely on."
She was quiet again for a few seconds.
"Can you show me?"
"No!" Sarah exclaimed, "I'm not giving you kissing lessons Cameron. It wouldn't be …appropriate."
"Why would it be inappropriate? Because you are John's mother? Because I am a cybernetic organism? Because you are female? Do females not kiss other females?"
"Well, yes, of course women can kiss other women, but.."
"Is it very different, heterosexual kissing as opposed to homosexual kissing?" Cameron persisted.
Sarah shook her head, wondering how she ended up having these conversations with the terminator.
"It is different, kissing a man and kissing a woman, but the mechanics are pretty much the same," she admitted, hoping Cameron wouldn't ask for details.
"So why can you not show me? It would be far more efficient that explaining in words." Cameron's intent gaze bore into Sarah.
"I don't want to kiss you Cameron. Kisses should be shared with someone you care for." Sarah avoided the sharp glare Cameron was giving her, knowing she wasn't being 100% truthful. Since this conversation had begun, she had been growing less shocked and more and more intrigued by the idea of showing Cameron how to kiss. It was inappropriate, but for some reason that didn't seem to matter right now.
"So you have never kissed someone you didn't care for?" Cameron asked. "Every kiss you have experienced has been with someone you cared for deeply?"
"Well, no, I have… Oh for goodness sake, " Sarah spluttered. "Alright, but I'm not kissing you here, come with me." She led the girl towards the privacy of her room, trying not to think of how she had noticed how pretty Cameron was in the odd weak moment.
Closing the door, she turned to her, squared her shoulders, took a deep breath and stepped closer.
"OK, so it's the end of your date and you and your partner are going to kiss goodnight," Sarah began, trying to get into some role-playing to avoid the awkwardness of the situation.
"First of all, you stand close together." She stepped right into Cameron's personal space, her voice dropping lower.
"You make eye contact, and touch them."
"Touch them where?" Cameron asked loudly.
"Hush, you're in an intimate position, you talk more gently. You might put your hands on their arms," She said, lightly running her hands over Cameron's upper arms and shoulders. Sarah was surprised how soft she felt. She had expected to feel the solid metal close to the surface of Cameron's skin, but she felt like a real person. She also smelt wonderful, something Sarah tried to ignore. Cameron had obviously explored the use of shampoos and soaps.
"Should I touch you in the same way?" Cameron asked in a rather husky whisper that did nothing to make Sarah feel any calmer.
"If you like. Or you might touch my sides, just above my waist." She felt Cameron's hand squeeze her tightly.
"No Cameron, gently. You must do everything gently so you don't hurt me."
"I am sorry," she said, pulling her hands away.
"Like this," Sarah said, moving her own hands to Cameron's waist, squeezing gently before sliding her hands around to the girl's back. Cameron stroked her hands up Sarah's arms, which were uncovered as Sarah was wearing her usual sleeveless tank top. Her light caresses made Sarah's skin tingle.
"That's better. Remember, it's a caress, not a physical examination." Sarah said, moving her hands back to rest lightly on the girl's hips.
"So, next you bring your face closer to your partner's. Remember, this is a person you are attracted to, so smile, compliment them." Sarah couldn't help noticing the lushness of Cameron's lips, and found herself anticipating the next part of the lesson.
Cameron gave her the biggest, fakest smile she had seen.
"You are an excellent fighter Sarah Connor, resourceful and intuitive."
Sarah grinned. "Erm, that's not quite the sort of compliment you usually give someone you want to kiss," she said. Cameron's fake smile thankfully disappeared, to be replaced by a look of puzzlement.
Sarah gave her best seductive smile, licking her lips as she looked at Cameron's very kissable mouth.
"You're a very beautiful girl, and I can't wait to kiss you," she murmured.
Cameron looked shocked for a second, before a pleased, and very genuine looking smile appeared on her face.
"Really?" She sounded like a child being given a surprise gift.
Sarah pulled back a little and cleared her throat. "That's the sort of thing you need to say," she said, avoiding eye contact, but unable to miss the slightly crestfallen look on Cameron's face.
"So you do not think I am beautiful and you do not wish to kiss me?" She said quietly.
"Just be quiet, ok?" Sarah muttered, wondering once again if she was out of her mind.
Sarah pressed on. "So, you're in close proximity, you establish intimacy, time for that kiss," she said putting her arms around Cameron once more.
"Are you going to kiss me now?" Cameron said in a small voice.
"Cameron, shut up," Sarah murmured.
She leaned towards her slowly. She could feel her own heart pounding at the intimacy of the moment. Cameron was a little taller than her, so she put a hand behind the girl's head, drawing her down towards her, closed her eyes and pressed her lips gently against Cameron's.
Pulling back a few seconds later, she could see Cameron looking puzzled again.
"What?" she asked, a little irritated that her kiss hadn't had more of an impact on the girl.
"I am uncertain," Cameron replied. "That felt.. nice."
"Hmm, well you might want to join in next time then," Sarah said, still a bit annoyed.
"Join in? What do you mean?" Cameron asked.
"When someone kisses you, you kiss them back. At least, you do if you like them," Sarah said, frowning a little.
"I should apply reciprocal pressure?"
"Yes," snapped Sarah, not wanting to hear robot speak when she was feeling a little aroused all of a sudden. "By the way, did you close your eyes?"
"No, I was watching you," Cameron said quietly.
"Well this time close your eyes, put your arms around me and kiss me back, ok?"
"Very well."
Sarah stepped closer once again, smoothing her hands over Cameron's hair, which really had no right to feel so silky. She cupped the back of her head, and drew her down, pressing her lips to Cameron's once again. She felt Cameron's hands slide around her waist. Much better. Sarah tilted her head a little, feeling the soft lips begin to press back against hers firmly. A bit too firmly. Cameron's teeth scraped painfully against her upper lip.
"Ow!" Sarah cried, jumping backwards away from the girl.
"I am sorry! I did not mean to… I have damaged you!" She looked almost distraught.
"It's fine," Sarah said quickly, "you just surprised me. Really, it's OK Cameron, don't worry." She could feel a painful little throb, but Cameron had not intended to harm her. She reassured the worried looking cyborg. "It's not uncommon when you are kissing someone for the first time to have a few little timing mishaps."
Of course Cameron's kissing mishaps could mean a losing a lip or chunk of tongue. Sarah tried not to think about that.
Cameron moved closer, cupping Sarah's cheek and raising her face towards to the light to inspect her lip. She was surprisingly gentle. Sarah wondered if she was remembering some of the lessons she had taught her.
"I am extremely sorry Sarah, I would never intentionally hurt you," she said sincerely.
Sarah grinned at her playfully. "Maybe now's the time to teach you how to kiss it better."
Cameron cocked her head to the side in that quizzical way. "My kiss will heal you?"
"No," smiled Sarah. "It's just an expression, but I think you need a bit of practice with how hard to kiss, and keeping your teeth out of the way."
"So you do not use your teeth at all when kissing?" Cameron asked.
"Well… you can, but I don't think I'll be showing you that," Sarah grinned.
Cameron gave her a small smile in return, still cupping her face. She enjoyed the sensation of touching Sarah's skin. The feeling of kissing her had been disconcerting. It was what had caused the injury. She had felt a strong urge to be closer to Sarah, pushing forwards too hard.
Applying the lessons Sarah had taught her, she brought her other hand up to run through Sarah's unruly dark locks.
"Your beauty distracted me. I am sorry, and I will definitely kiss it better," she whispered, before leaning down and pressing ever so gently against the small wound with her lips.
Sarah felt herself grow warmer at the intimate words and tone. Cameron sure was a quick study. The light kisses she was pressing all around her mouth were further stirring her desires. Sarah was beginning to wonder whether she should call a halt to this. It was supposed to be a simple lesson in how to kiss, not a seduction. Although at this moment, she was not sure who was seducing who.
She found herself kissing Cameron back, winding her arms around the girl's neck, pressing her body against Cameron's. She was struck once again at how unexpectedly soft she felt. If she didn't known better, she would never have known this was a machine she was kissing, that the hands rather skilfully stroking her body were not human.
It was a breathless Sarah that drew back a few moments later.
"OK, maybe we'd better stop there," she said trying to force herself to calm down. "I think you've got it."
"I have mastered kissing?" Cameron asked. Sarah looked at her closely. Was she affected at all? Her eyes did look brighter than she had noticed before.
"Well, not exactly mastered it, but probably enough to be going on with," she said, pulling herself out of Cameron's arms and stepping away.
"Can you teach me about French kissing now?" Cameron said eagerly. "What do you do with your tongue?"
"Cameron, that's enough for tonight. I'm tired," Sarah said wearily.
"But I have many more questions. I will undoubtedly need your help again Sarah. And I will need to put into practice what you taught me."
"Not with John you don't," Sarah said sharply.
"Why would you think I would wish to kiss John?" Cameron said, looking a little hurt. "It is my understanding that most humans are monogamous, that they engage in intimacy with only one person at a time. You are my kissing partner."
"No I'm not Cameron, I was just showing you a few things. I'm not available for extra practice." Sarah said defensively, unwilling to admit even to herself how enjoyable she had found kissing Cameron.
"I want to kiss you again," Cameron said sounding like a small child once more. "Do you not want to kiss me?"
"That's not the issue. I said I would help you, and I have so... I think you should go now," Sarah said needing to be alone and away from the distracting sight of Cameron's slightly swollen lips.
"Very well," Cameron said in a quiet voice. "Goodnight Sarah"
"Goodnight."
Sarah flopped down on her bed with a huge sigh.
"Fuck," she muttered to herself. She really didn't need any further distractions, and now she was going to be all too aware of Cameron and her lovely lips.
"Fuck…"
The next morning, Sarah was surprised to find that Cameron had made breakfast. John was happily wolfing down toast while flicking through the tv channels when she entered the kitchen.
"Morning," she yawned.
"Hey mom," John replied without looking over at her.
Cameron on the other hand had not taken her eyes off Sarah since she entered the room. She had spent much of the night analysing her responses to Sarah's kisses. Cameron had decided that more data was needed, although she doubted whether Sarah would be willing to kiss her again. A plan of action was needed, and it began with breakfast.
"Would you like a cup of coffee?" Cameron asked, reminding Sarah of her days as a waitress for a moment.
"Sure," she agreed, taking a seat and pulling the toast rack towards her. Sarah had been wondering how Cameron would be this morning. Apart from the breakfast, she was pleased to see things appeared almost normal. The last thing Sarah wanted was Cameron leaping across the breakfast table to pounce on her, demanding more kissing training. Sarah lost herself in the visual image of that happening for a moment, causing an embarrassed little smile to appear on her face at the idea.
Except for a more intense gaze than normal, Cameron was her usual pre-school self, ignoring John's half-hearted moans about homework and Sarah's sandwich making skills.
When Cameron and John left for school, Sarah breathed a sigh of relief that things seemed pretty much as normal between her and Cameron. She vowed to avoid any more kissing lessons, and ignored the little voice of regret in her head. Sarah was a woman on a mission. Keeping John safe had been her only priority for the past 16 years. She was not someone to be distracted easily.
"I need to go shopping," Cameron announced a few days later. "All of the girls are buying hot dresses for the prom. I need a hot dress."
John sniggered as usual whenever Cameron came out with her comments on human interactions.
"Take it easy Cameron, I wouldn't want you to lead Morris on," he grinned.
"Lead him on? Oh, you mean give him the impression that I am interested in him sexually. No, that would be… undesirable."
"Aren't you curious at all?" Sarah asked quietly. "You've expressed an… interest in human sexuality, maybe Morris is the man for you." Sarah gave Cameron a look, waggling her eyebrows.
"The prom is certainly an important moment for people," John said walking up to Cameron and giving her a pat on the shoulder. "You never know, you might enjoy yourself. Morris is certainly keen enough." He ruffled her hair in a way that Cameron found quite annoying.
"Will you come with me to buy a dress tomorrow?" She asked Sarah seriously, ignoring John's teasing.
Sarah considered for a moment, before nodding.
"Sure, why not," she smiled.
They hit the mall after school, dropping off John at an electronics store to check out the newest gadgets that he loved so much.
Cameron proved herself to be a very efficient shopper, to Sarah's total lack of surprise.
"Don't tell me, you downloaded the store guide, planned our route and made a list of what you needed," she half moaned as Cameron marched them out of the third shoe shop into an adjacent store that just happened to stock dresses.
"It seemed a logical thing to do," Cameron said absently, scanning the racks of formal dresses. "I do not think there will be anything suitable here." She turned, intending to go to the next shop on her list.
Sarah decided to put her foot down.
"Hold it right there girlie," she said, grabbing Cameron's arm. "I'm sick of walking in and out of shops. Come on, you're trying something on." She pulled the reluctant but not totally uncooperative girl towards the back of the store.
Sarah could not remember the last time she went shopping for dresses. It just wasn't something that had been part of her life since before meeting Kyle and getting pregnant with John, and the whole nightmare that her life had become. Sometimes she found it hard to remember a time when her life wasn't a chaotic mess.
So, this shopping trip with Cameron was just so weird, but in a pleasantly nostalgic sort of way. She gave the girl an appraising look. She had a fabulous body and would look good in just about anything, Sarah thought. Although she was definitely on the skinny side, so they'd need something that flattered her.
She grabbed a classic little black dress from a rack, holding it up to Cameron's body.
"Hmm, might be a bit too conservative, but you can try it on," she muttered, thrusting it into Cameron's hands. Sarah turned back to the dresses, choosing next a longer strapless one in a deep green.
"Not sure if that's your colour, but it'll do."
A few dresses later, she was steering Cameron towards the changing rooms at the back of the shop. Cameron was out of her depth for once. She had observed all of the dresses Sarah had chosen and analysed them for size, but she really had no idea whether they would look good on her. She was glad she had asked Sarah to come along.
Cameron was still none the wiser about fashion some time later, when Sarah had declared that the black dress was 'the one'. To Cameron, all of the dresses had looked acceptable, but Sarah had been adamant.
"This is the one Cameron. Very classy but a little bit sexy. Yep, this is it."
"Do I need to look classy and sexy?" She asked. "Most teenage girls appear to favour skanky and revealing in their wardrobe choices."
"Well you're not most girls Cameron," Sarah stated firmly. "Besides, we don't want you standing out from the crowd too much. This dress will look good on you, but it's pretty discreet too." She grinned at Cameron's frown.
"Did you want to be the belle of the ball?" She teased.
"No, you are quite right Sarah," Cameron said not meeting her eyes. "But I thought you chose it because it suited me best, not because it was the most unobtrusive."
Sarah noticed the slightly sulky expression, and Cameron's adorable pout.
"You'll be the most beautiful girl there," Sarah said reaching out to rub her shoulder without thinking, seeking to console the depressed looking girl.
"You really think so?" Cameron asked with a sudden eager smile.
Sarah silently cursed herself for speaking without thinking. She had almost forgotten the kissing episode of the other week. OK, so she hadn't really, but she had been telling herself to forget it, which was almost the same thing.
Cameron moved closer, reaching out to grasp Sarah's hips and gently pulling her towards her.
"I wish I was going to the prom with you," she said earnestly, looking into Sarah's eyes.
Sarah was frozen for a moment, suddenly aware of the small changing room they occupied that made retreat tricky. She was also drawn in by those annoyingly lovely lips pouting at her.
No, this wasn't going to happen again, she decided, just a few seconds before Cameron over rode her decision, leaning in and kissing her so very softly, once then twice.
"Cameron, please…" she whispered, suddenly finding it hard to move.
Cameron seemed to think that was an invitation, as she reached up to cup Sarah's cheeks, and kissed her again, more firmly this time.
Damn, but the girl was obviously not in need of any further lessons, Sarah thought as she instinctively slid her arms around her waist, unable to stop herself from responding to the urging of Cameron's lips.
A noise from outside the changing room broke the spell, and Sarah pulled back and out of Cameron's arms. She backed against the wall, holding out her hands to fend off the amorous advancing terminator.
"Stop, please. We can't do this Cameron," she gasped, still breathless.
"Why not? We both appeared to enjoy it and I would like to continue," Cameron said intently, edging closer to Sarah once more.
"No! You need to listen when I tell you no!" Sarah snapped. "We aren't doing this again Cameron, so just back off ok?"
Cameron shrank back quickly at Sarah's hostile tone.
"I apologise," she said quietly. "I did not wish to make you uncomfortable. I thought you enjoyed our interactions as much as I did."
"Yeah, well, I didn't so.." she lied, edging towards the door. "Let's just go." Sarah made her escape, making it around the corner before leaning against a wall, her knees feeling decidedly wobbly. Wow, could that girl kiss. She wondered whether the request for lessons had been a ruse from the start, as Cameron certainly seemed to have a knack.
Cameron sat on the chair, looking at the dresses Sarah had insisted she try on. She was very confused about her feelings. Why was she feeling so… depressed? She had never felt so deflated before, and it was obviously Sarah's rejection that had made her feel bad. Cameron did not like this emotion. It did not appear useful, merely painful. Maybe she was malfunctioning. Emotional pain could not be part of her programming. She made a note to perform a full diagnostic later.
Pulling herself together, she gathered the dresses, putting the black one on one side to purchase. She wondered what Sarah really thought of her in the dress. Did she really think she looked sexy and classy? Cameron was beginning to regret her decision to explore human sexuality.
Things were a little tense around the house for the next few days. Cameron keeping her distance from Sarah, barely entering the kitchen when she was there. For her part, Sarah tried to keep occupied, avoiding being alone with Cameron.
"What's going on with you and Mom?" John asked on their way to school a few days before Prom.
Cameron considered how to respond. She was inclined to extreme truthfulness that bordered on rudeness, but she was aware that discussing her relationship with Sarah was not something she should do. Particularly with John.
"We had a disagreement," she settled on.
"Hmm, so the usual then." John grunted. "I don't know who is the more pig headed out of the two of you."
"I am not pig headed," Cameron replied, not completely sure what that meant but pretty sure it was not a compliment.
"I know you're a superior cybernetic organism and all, but she's the boss you know. Mom's word is pretty much it, all we can do is try and persuade her to listen." John went on.
Cameron considered. Persuade her? Would that work?
"How do you suggest I persuade Sarah Connor to come around to my way of thinking?" She asked the young man.
"Use your logic of course," he said swiftly. "You always have good reasons for doing things Cameron, so try and win her over with reasoned logic."
What logical reason could Cameron come up with to persuade Sarah to engage in more kissing with her? She seemed very much against the idea of Cameron becoming involved with John in any way. Perhaps that was a possibility.
Cameron also forced herself to consider that maybe it was the experience of kissing, not specifically kissing Sarah, that was what she was intrigued by. The kisses with Sarah were her only experience. Maybe she would enjoy kissing anybody? It might not be Sarah that was special.
For some reason, she did not like that idea. Sarah fascinated her in a way that no one else did. Cameron was fairly sure that kissing someone else would not elicit the same response within her. However, being the logical cyborg she was, she thought about other potential kissing partners.
Morris was an obvious choice, however he was John's friend and the prom was a few days away. Cameron felt the need for swifter action. She wanted to kiss someone today.
In the interests of fair testing, only altering one variable at a time, she reasoned that she really should kiss a girl, however, Cameron was not on friendly terms with any of the girls and was aware that it could draw unwanted attention to herself. Perhaps Morris was a better choice after all.
She glanced around the school entrance as she and John waited to go through security as they did each morning. Did any of the males or females stir her attention at all? That boy over there was quite good looking, but she didn't like his ginger hair. The tall girl coming through the barrier now was very athletic looking with a pleasing body. Or how about that older man on the x-ray machine. None of them held her attention for long. Oddly, Cameron found herself reluctant to select an object of her attention. All of the potentials seemed to have some flaw that discounted them.
"Hey Cam," Morris said, approaching her from the side. She disliked the nickname but decided not to comment on it.
"Good morning," she replied formally.
"What's up Morris," John greeted his friend.
She watched John and Morris chatting, feeling more and more disconnected from the children at the school. She did not feel the desire to kiss any of them. She felt an odd thump in her chest when she thought about who she did want to kiss.
Cameron was annoyed with the way she was feeling. Emotions were not something cyborgs were designed for. She was still uncertain where these feelings came from. She had no trouble being the unemotional robot Sarah appeared to see her as when fighting. When it was the mission she was focussed on, she did not have any trouble acting in a totally logical way. She did not feel any real guilt over the deaths of Dimitri and his sister. She had not killed them, merely done nothing to prevent their deaths. The only regret she felt was that she would not be receiving any more ballet lessons. Cameron was puzzled why she could be so logical and focussed in some instances, yet when it came to personal relationships rational thought seemed so much harder.
Putting Sarah and her appealing body out of her mind, she followed John and Morris into school, looking at Morris objectively. Did she find him attractive? He seemed like such a child. Cameron wasn't sure how old she was, what with all the time jumping, but she had seen a lot in her time, and Morris was so young. Perhaps that tough life experience was another reason she felt a kinship with Sarah.
No, stop thinking about Sarah Connor!
"Would you have lunch with me?" she found herself asking Morris suddenly.
A delighted look came over his face.
"I sure would! I'll see you at 12." He gave Cameron a huge smile before practically skipping off to his first class.
John didn't look amused for once.
"What was that all about?" he asked suspiciously.
"I am supposed to be going on a date with him," Cameron said, "so sharing lunch is expected is it not?"
John didn't reply, just looked at her closely for a few seconds more, then grunting as he moved off to class.
"Well, be nice to him," he threw over his shoulder.
Cameron could eat, an important ability for terminators wanting to infiltrate human camps. However she did not particularly enjoy the sensation of chewed up food sliding down her oesophagus. As a very skinny girl, she could get away with not eating in front of people very much, but with Morris watching her closely, she forced down a few bites of a sandwich that John had passed to her, knowing she would need lunch cover.
Morris was prattling away about music and computers and his family. It was all very dull. However, Cameron kept an attentive smile on her face, and nodded in agreement every now and then, not really paying attention. She needed to find an opportunity to kiss him to test her theory.
Lunch break was nearly over and he was STILL talking! Cameron decided to take the initiative.
"I wish to talk to you in private," she said firmly, reaching out and pulling him up from the bench.
"Wow, you're strong," Morris marvelled. "Never would have guessed, you being so thin and all."
Cameron tried out one of her smiles on him, and from the idiotic way he grinned back, she guessed her distraction strategy worked.
Striding over to a small patch of trees, she pushed Morris up against one of them, looking into his eyes. She remembered what Sarah had told her, and moved closer to him. He had an odd expression on his face, half alarm, half amazed at his luck that this girl was coming onto him.
"I wish to kiss you," she declared putting her hands on his shoulders. He was about the same height as Sarah, perhaps a little shorter. Cameron bent her head, and gave him a small smile.
"You are a helpful friend," she said quietly, remembering that compliments were important. Morris was completely speechless as he watched her lean closer. He could feel sweat breaking out all over his body.
Cameron brought her lips to his and pressed gently against him in a light kiss.
Hmm. Nothing notable so far. She kissed him a few more times, light pecks, gauging her body's response, or rather lack of response.
Perhaps she was not doing it properly. Morris was not really participating, appearing to be in shock. Cameron deepened the kiss, pressing her body up against his, sliding her hands into his hair.
What was that? His hair felt sticky and unpleasant. Some sort of product she surmised, moving her hands to cup his face. His skin was uneven, a mixture of the beginnings of stubble and blotchy teenage skin that did not feel especially nice.
She focussed on his lips instead. Not as soft as Sarah's, but quite pleasant she decided, continuing the kiss for a few seconds more.
When Cameron withdrew shortly afterwards, Morris was still silent, moving his lips, but making no sound for a short time.
"Er..that was…er…wow Cameron…" he spluttered.
"Thank you for your assistance," she said quickly cutting him off, wanting to analyse the kiss. She gave him the required smile before turning to walk away.
What had she done wrong? That had not been anything like as stirring as kissing Sarah had been. Cameron had not felt any emotion, any pleasure at all. It had been mechanical, like brushing her teeth or washing her hair. Something she did without any sensation at all.
When kissing Sarah, she had been inundated with sensations. The feel of Sarah's lips moving against hers, her skin and how it felt under her fingers, her scent, the softness of her hair. Cameron had not wanted it to end. The second time, she had found herself getting lost in the kiss much quicker, less focussed on the mechanics, and more involved in the act of kissing Sarah.
Kissing Morris had been, well, nothing really. Was it her performance? Had she done something different? Or was it that she was actually attracted to Sarah?
Cameron considered all of these things as she headed off to afternoon classes, anxious to get home and discuss it with Sarah, if she would talk to her of course.
It was disconcerting being watched, Sarah Connor thought to herself as Cameron sat at the kitchen table motionless. She had been in the same position for almost 20 minutes ever since she and John had arrived home from school.
Sarah was no great cook, but she was preparing vegetables for their dinner while Cameron just sat there watching here. She had ignored Sarah's snippy comments to go and oil something, just sitting there looking at her.
Cameron was trying to analyse what it was about Sarah Connor that attracted her. She was beautiful in a slightly scruffy way, her dark hair tumbling over her shoulders carelessly, a worn sleeveless shirt that had seen better days and black jeans with scuffed brown boots. She had an appealing body, a little too slim, but toned and fit, smooth skin, beautiful eyes, soft lips.
No doubt there were prettier women around. Objectively, Cameron could acknowledge that Sarah was not the most beautiful woman in the world. But it was so much more than looks. When you examined Sarah closely, as she was doing, you couldn't miss the expression in her eyes. Wary, pained, troubled, driven, determined, sad, angry, committed. She smiled rarely, hardly ever seemed relaxed or happy, was always on the alert for possible danger.
Yet right now, even looking pissed off, she fascinated Cameron, who recognised the contrast between Sarah's expressive features and her own usually blank expression. Was it that Sarah felt everything so deeply while she struggled to really feel anything that drew Cameron to her?
She kept returning to the kiss, comparing the non-event of kissing Morris to the earthquake-like effect Sarah's kisses had on her.
She wanted very much to kiss Sarah again, see if she had become immune to the emotions evoked by kissing now. Cameron suspected she wasn't, suspected that it was Sarah who made the difference.
"Are you going to sit there all day?" Sarah asked tersely, not liking how disconcerted Cameron's intense stare was making her.
Cameron didn't reply.
"Well? What's going on Cameron?" Sarah said after a few moments silence, putting down her vegetable knife and facing the girl.
"I … I wish to discuss something with you, but I suspect you will refuse to talk to me," Cameron replied, keeping her eyes on Sarah's face, seeing her lower her gaze, suddenly comprehending the reason for Cameron's stare.
"Oh. You're talking about..."
"I kissed Morris today," Cameron announced suddenly.
Sarah's head shot up, looking at the girl in surprise, both at the declaration and the action.
"Really? At school?"
"Yes, at lunchtime. Behind a tree."
Sarah smiled behind her hand, watching Cameron sitting at the kitchen table reporting on the kiss as if it were a mission debrief.
"And..?"
Cameron did not like the amused tone of Sarah's voice. She found herself annoyed at Sarah's attitude towards her exploration of human sexuality. She wanted to shake Sarah out of her complacent chuckles.
She stood up, walking slowly towards the older woman, who lost her smile instantly. Cameron noticed Sarah's wary look as soon as she got to her feet.
"And it was unremarkable. It did not compare to kissing you Sarah. Kissing Morris caused no emotional response in me at all, whereas kissing you..." Cameron was just a pace away now, her voice dropping to a low tone.
"Kissing you Sarah, was a most remarkable experience. I have found myself reliving that experience repeatedly. My palms become sweaty, my body temperature rises by 0.5 degrees. The memory of kissing you arouses me Sarah Connor." Only a few inches separated their faces, Cameron studying Sarah all over again, noticing the slight dilation of her pupils, the increase in Sarah's respiration. It appeared that Cameron was not the only one who was aroused.
Cameron looked into her eyes then glanced at her lips. Sarah hadn't said anything, hadn't pushed her away. Another kiss seemed appropriate at this time. She moved closer, tilting her head and brushed her lips against Sarah's. The instant tingling emphasised once again to Cameron that kissing Sarah was special, however, more research really was essential. She leaned in again.
*This shouldn't be happening. Not again.*
Sarah found herself kissing Cameron back, stroking her hands through her hair, across her back, around her waist. She shouldn't be opening her mouth to let in Cameron's inquisitive tongue, or subtly teaching her how to use it. She should not be cupping her face or nibbling her bottom lip before plunging her own tongue into the girl's mouth. And she definitely should not be pulling Cameron against her, leaning against the kitchen counter and pressing her own body into Cameron's so closely.
So why was she doing these things, Sarah asked herself as Cameron kissed along her neck and Sarah slid her hands around Cameron's hips to cup her ass.
There was no logical reason to kiss her. She was a terminator, a machine. She was a girl. She was posing as her 16 year old step-daughter. She strongly suspected John had a crush on her. Derek didn't trust her. Charley was scared of her.
So with all of these reasons, why was Sarah pulling her close, kissing her once again, moaning quietly as Cameron nibbled her neck?
Maybe it was something to do with the way Cameron looked at her. There was an intensity in her gaze. She appeared to find Sarah fascinating, and being the object of her interest was undeniably flattering. She had come to trust the terminator in the months they had been together. She had already saved them several times over. Plus there was that hot body, and her habit of walking around with very few clothes on.
However, this kiss had probably gone on too long already. Even with her eyes closed and her hands and mouth busy, she was aware that John or Derek could come in at any time, which would definitely complicate things.
Sarah eased back, avoiding Cameron's questing mouth.
"No, stop," she said gently. "We need to stop Cameron. This isn't the time or place for this."
She looked at the visibly aroused terminator. Was that genuine emotion evident in her eyes now? Sarah smiled as she held her shoulders.
"I.. Can we do that again?" Cameron asked in a husky sounding voice. "I enjoy kissing you very much Sarah."
"I know," Sarah looked at her for a moment before turning away to the sink, holding onto the edge tightly and looking out of the window, trying to centre herself again.
"I know."
Cameron moved up behind her, standing very close, smoothing her hands over Sarah's hips.
"In the time between missions, I have been unable to think of anything but you Sarah," she murmured into her ear. "Since the first time we kissed you have occupied my thoughts to the exclusion of almost everything else."
Sarah spun around quickly, pulling out of Cameron's arms and walking away a few steps, putting some distance between them.
"Which is why this isn't right Cameron," she said urgently. "You have to protect John, you aren't here for me. I'm distracting you, and you shouldn't be allowing me to do that. *I* shouldn't be allowing it to happen." She ran a hand through her hair, pacing backwards and forwards.
Cameron stopped her pacing, grasping her by the shoulders. "I have been doing my job Sarah, John has not come to any harm. I am able to protect him and think about you too. I am able to multitask." She gave a little smirk.
Sarah looked at her silently. This was wrong on so many levels, so why was she still standing here, wanting this girl, this terminator to kiss her again?
"Why do you even want this Cameron?" she asked after a few minutes contemplation.
"I am uncertain," Cameron answered, looking genuinely puzzled. "As you have said to me many times, I am a machine, I do not require love in the way that humans do. I cannot procreate. Yet when I look at you Sarah Connor, I feel emotions unlike any I have felt before. When we kiss, I forget I am a cybernetic organism, and there is only you."
It was actually one of the sweetest declarations of affection Sarah had ever had.
"Sarah, I know what my mission priorities are, and I assure you, protecting John will always be my primary goal. But I also wish to protect you. I wish to give you pleasure and comfort. I wish to expand my own programming by experiencing an intimate relationship with you, and I believe you would enjoy such a relationship as well. We will not forget our mission. Please, allow me to be close to you."
How was it possible that a machine, a terminator at that, could be so...well, so damn sweet!
Sarah stared helplessly at her. Was it what she wanted? Could it work? It was absurd. She should just stop this right now. There was no way she could have a real relationship with a terminator. Just because Cameron could mimic human emotions did not give her a soul.
Sarah lifted her gaze to deliver her verdict.
The words stuck in her throat.
Cameron was gazing back at her, not all soppy eyed or love struck, but not her usual blank stare either. It was as if she knew every thought that had just gone through Sarah's mind.
Of course she did, Cameron was nothing if not logical. She also knew Sarah pretty well and had probably predicted the direction of her thoughts.
They stared at one another for several silent moments.
"You know it's not possible Cameron," Sarah said after a while. "You know it."
"Yes, any relationship between us is entirely illogical," she agreed but Sarah could tell she was not really in agreement.
Silence again.
"I'm not really…you know… anyway," Sarah stammered.
"Yes, by all accounts you are heterosexual." Cameron agreed.
"And then there's the whole step-daughter thing."
"Sarah."
"And John has a bit of a thing for you, to say nothing of your prom date.."
"Sarah."
"Plus you're, you know, a machine. Cybernetic organism or whatever..."
"Sarah," Cameron said more loudly, "it is alright. I understand and I will abide by your decision."
"I'm sorry Cameron, I just think we need to stay focussed, you know?"
There was silence as the two women stood in the quiet kitchen watching each other. It was unclear who moved first. Sarah just knew that despite her words, despite all logic, she wanted her. Pulling Cameron's face towards her, she kissed her roughly, pulling herself close to the terminator's body.
"Ah fuck it," Sarah muttered between kisses. "I was never going to let you go to the prom with that kid anyway."
"I know." Cameron said, holding Sarah's face between those super strong hands.
"So, how was the prom?" Sarah asked as John came in, smoothing down her slightly ruffled hair.
John wondered what Cameron was studying so intently as she sat at the kitchen table next to his mother with a book in front of her.
"It was ok. Morris was a bit upset you stood him up Cameron," he said, reaching into the refrigerator for a coke.
"I informed him last week I would not be attending," Cameron replied coolly.
"Yeah, well you wouldn't have liked it anyway. All that dancing probably isn't your scene." He laughed.
"Ha, imagine you dancing," he said with a big grin as he headed for his room."
"Yes, imagine that," Sarah said looking into Cameron's eyes.
They both smiled.