IM BACK

AND WITH THE SEQUEL: Finding Myself

So yesterday was my last day of school! And now I'm back for the summer and ready to get on this story! And like I said before, it's going to revolve around the book the Voyage of the Dawn Treader. So if you haven't read the book I suggest you do so! And it's going to be in the first person, so now it'll be more personal!

So hopefully all you dedicated readers are reading this right now and will review my non-forgotten story! Thanks so much for sticking with me through everything. Hope you're all having a good summer/end of school year and that my story cheers you up in case you're not!

ENJOY!

And our story begins…

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Chapter 1: Worlds Away

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My POV

"You little liar!" yelled and enraged and younger version of Peter Pevensie. I watched quietly and patiently from the sidelines. I had quite a beautiful view of not just the minor fight the siblings were having, but also of a very snowy Narnia. It seemed as if a whole sheet of white covered the land and every tree and shrub in site.

I leaned back into the white tipped lamp post, the same one that I had been entranced by from the carvings in Aslan's How. The yellow light from the lamp contrasted beautifully white the bland white of the landscape, giving it a magnificent orange hue. How I would have loved to come upon Narnia during the winter.

"You didn't believe her either!" a younger, much snottier version of Edmund yelled back. I snorted. Of course…that is exactly how Edmund must had been like when he was younger. Bratty, selfish, and downright rude. But then again, every young boy went through that stage; Peter was just older here and had probably gone through that stage a few years ago.

"Apologize to Lucy." Peter was in his acting like a father stage, I concluded.

At the mention of her name, I turned to Lucy would was watching the debate as carefully as I was. I knew exactly how they had all gotten into this mess. It was a story that was much different than mine. Peter, Edmund, Susan, and Lucy as all been playing a game of cricket outside in the fields of some old and elegant mansion. I had no idea how they had gotten there in the first place, but from listening to their conversations between each other is seemed like they were sent away from England due to World War II. That made sense enough.

Anyways, they had been playing cricket when suddenly Edmund had a very good hit. Too good, in fact, and he ended up breaking a window with the ball. Then they all chased it, hid in a magical closet, and boom! Here they were, in Narnia. And here they were, arguing because Edmund had been lying about not coming to Narnia with Lucy. That episode was what…3 or 4 dreams ago? I can't remember.

That's why instead of trying to recall when Edmund had gone to Narnia for the first time and met the White Witch, I instead tuned back into my favorite reoccurring dream; or what I like to call it, my favorite TV show.

Edmund looked rather hesitant to apologize, that's until Peter screamed at him. "Say you're sorry!"

"Alright…fine! I'm sorry Lucy." He grumbled.

"That's alright," a cute and petit version of Lucy replied. "Some children just don't know when to stop pretending." I giggled at that. But laughed even harder when I saw the condescending face that Edmund made back. Oh, if only he could watch himself.

The siblings talked and argued a bit more; something about seeing a faun named Mr. Tumnus, and then began to walk away. Eager to not lose sight of your long-lost friends, I jumped up off the lamp post and started to follow them. However, before I could take a step forward, the buzzing of a familiar alarm echoed throughout all of Narnia. And right before my eyes, just like when I had walked through that split open tree, everything disappeared.

And I was back to square one.

I woke up to the sight of my pillow. I guess I somehow managed to squish my face too deep into it during the course of the night. I subconsciously turned off my phone alarm that rang silently yet steadily. I looked at the clock on my phone, it read 4:30. I did not want to wake up the rest of the slumbering house.

Ever since that dreaded phone call…nothing has been the same. My life had been completely turned upside down and I had no idea what to do with myself. But I guess it was a good thing, seeing as it finally helped me understand who I am and what I need to do here. It made me realize that it was now or never to stick up for myself, that now was the time for a change, that if I didn't do things my way now I never would.

So much as happened since I left Narnia…I guess I should tell you my story of everything that's been going on. After all, I did come home for a reason…

It started a few days after I got back from Narnia. I had frantically been searching for the Pevensies location through the internet. I must have been googling for hours on end, but it seemed like the four had dropped off of the face of the Earth. I wondered for a while if they had gone back to Narnia after all, even though Aslan had said Peter and Susan would not be going back.

But that thought dropped after I found Susan.

I found her under the name Suzanne Pevensie-Proctor. I should have known that even marriage wouldn't subdue her independence. She kept her maiden name, making things much easier than they could have been. However, even though I had found her, there was still the mystery of the three other Pevensies. But that was all clarified, unfortunately, when I finally got the courage to call up Susan.

"Hello?" Came a friendly voice from the other line. It was the older voice of Susan. I could just tell.

"Hello, Susan?" I replied.

"Yes…who is this?"

I panicked. What if she didn't remember me? I had to have been at least 50 years since you met you, seeing as the time distance from which you both were from was rather a large gap. She had to be around 60 or 70 years old by now. It was highly improbable that she would remember a meaningless little girl from decades ago?

"Umm…it's me…Jade." I said reluctantly. "Remember me?"

It was silent on the other line. My hopes flew up.

"My God…Jade." She whispered. "I can't believe this…Is it really you?"

"Yeah, it's me." I said with a big smile. "You better believe it. I'm so glad I found you."

"Me too. Finally…I've been waiting for you."

"You have? Why?" I asked. "Is something wrong?"

"Well…not really. It's just, you mentioned that you had lived in the year 2009 when we first met, remember? I have waited all my life for this year, praying that I'd live to see the day that we meet again. And here you are. You may not be in person, but…it's the next best thing. You don't know how good it is to hear your voice again." She said.

You sighed, looking down the hall towards where the rest of your family slept.

"Oh…you have no idea."

There was another awkward silence, and then Susan uttered the words that you were not prepared for.

"So…umm…how long have you been back?" she asked.

"From Narnia?" I asked, even though I well knew what she meant. "Four days. Four agonizing days. I miss it there so much…I don't know how you did it Susan…twice that is."

She laughed. "Well…the first time was a mistake. That was the hardest time of my life. I prayed and dreamed of going back, just like I'm sure you do. But then I got used to living in England. So by the time I went back for the second time, it didn't feel much like home anymore. I had already lived a full life, there was nothing left for me to learn in Narnia."

"I understand." I said.

"What about Caspian? Do you miss him?"

Was that even a question? Of course I missed him. I…

"Let's not talk about that." I said, dying to changed the subject. I just couldn't bring myself to think about those things. It was better to just forget everything "But, how are Peter, Edmund and Lucy?" I asked.

More silence. It didn't seem like she was going to respond. "Susan?" I asked. I heard a choked sob from the other end. This didn't sound good.

"Oh child…I've forgotten how much you've missed. We live years apart." She paused for awhile. "Peter…Edmund…Lucy…they're all dead."

My heart had stopped from hearing that news. I had cried myself to sleep for weeks afterwards. How could this be? I finally had found friends whom I grew to love and adore, only to find out that they were all dead and I only had one left? I didn't understand. How could Aslan have let this happen? If only they had just stayed in Narnia, none of this would have happened.

If only I had stayed in Narnia…maybe none of this would have happened. Maybe I cold have changed everything.

But Susan urged me not to feel guilty, that is wasn't my fault. They had died in our world in a train accident, not Narnia. But it still didn't make me feel less guilty in the least.

She told me also of how she had lost faith in Narnia, denying that it had ever existed when she got older. She told me how she would refer to Narnia as "that game we used to play when we were younger" with Lucy. Lucy and her brothers had been heartbroken at Susan's loss in faith, but could I really blame her? She was trying to grow into a woman and live a good life in her world, just like you were, and the only way to accomplish that would be to let go of all the memories from that place, just like you were attempting to do. But it wasn't that easy for you, seeing as someone in Narnia still held your heart in his hands.

But Susan, on the other hand, had little that she held dear in Narnia, save for the long lost life that she had years ago. She forgot about Narnia and lost faith. But her faith was restored, she said, when her siblings had died. From that day forward, she began to remember and accept her past. But unfortunately, it was too late to do anything about it then. She felt guilty knowing that her siblings died thinking that she had completely abandoned her past life.

My heart broke for Susan. Her whole family was dead, including her husband. She must be so alone…

But no worries, Alex would change all of that. Speaking of-

I rolled over on my side to see Alex sound asleep on the edge of my bed. Her hair a wild mess, and her light breathing echoed through the dead silent house. But then again, it was 4:30 in the morning. No one should be awake. But then again, I'm pretty sure that we were the only two people in a 50 mile radius that needed to catch a flight at 7am in the morning.

Yep, that's right. Me and Alex are BOTH going to England. That was part of the reason why I had gotten back into contact with Susan. I would take Alex with me, and while I went to college Susan would watch over my little baby sister for me. I'd find a good paying job and work part time during the school year and full time during the summer, save up some money for and apartment or something, and then eventually graduate college, send Alex to school, and start my life in England, far far away from my dysfunctional "family." It would be like scratching everything and starting a new, better life for me and my sister.

At least, that was the plan.

I knew I could count on Susan to help me if times got rough, but I'd eventually have to start taking care of her as she got older. But I didn't care, she was more family to me than m own mother was. Plus, I just know that she'd love Alex like her own daughter.

I gently nudged Alex and watched her eyes open slightly.

"Hey bud, get dressed. It's time to go, we don't wanna miss our flight." I whispered. Giving me a slight now, she began to slowly but surely wake up and get dressed. I followed suit. We had picked out our clothes and packed everything the night before.

I smiled as I watched Alex wiggle into her jeans. I was more than happy she was coming with me to England. I knew for sure that this was one of the many things I needed to do here on Earth. Alex was the only good family I had left, I couldn't just abandon her here while I went off to college. I did not give up all of Narnia just to leave her behind once more.

But bringing her with me wasn't an easy task. I had to totally reschedule everything. First off, I had to trade in my round trip ticket into two one way tickets for me and Alex. I almost had to reschedule my orientation date for Cumbria. But luckily, the date for my arrival to college remained August 14th. Today was the 13th. I figured the plane trip would take about half the day. We'd land in England, meet up with Susan who would be waiting for us, and I would spend the night with her before heading off for orientation. And until school would start a week from then, we would go shopping and stuff for my dorm room. It was all set.

The only catch was that I kinda sorta maybe threatened my whole family the day before to get them to allow me to take Alex with me.

I sat at the top of the stairs, Alex beside me. She was crying her eyes out on my shoulder.

"I'll n- never get to go to-to England, J-Jade. Mommy won't l-let m-me." She whined.

"Yes she will." I said determinedly, with fire in my eyes. "She will let you go…or else."

"Or else wh-what?"

"You'll see." I seethed. I stood up quickly from my spot and marched down the stairs. I was so mad I could have sworn there was smoke coming out of my ears and that my vision was clouded by the color red.

I walked into the kitchen to see my mom cleaning the dishes while the boys wrestled in the living room with Tyler cheering them on. The sight made me sick to my stomach.

"Mom." I said with no emotion.

"What?" she asked, without even looking up from the dishes.

"I'm taking Alex to England with me."

She snorted. "Like hell you are." I refused to back down.

"It wasn't a question." I said stiffly. "She is coming with me."

This made my mom turn around, the usual scowl on her face every time she had to talk to me. "No she is not, now get the hell out of my sight." She turned back around.

"You wanna know what I saw in the middle of the street on my way back from mall with Alex?" I asked, seething. I didn't wait for her to answer. "A dead cat in the middle of the fucking street."

"Who cares about some cat?" she replied.

"Alex does! Seeing as "that cat" happened to be Scotti! When we came home, Alex in tears, those assholes were cheering about how it was them who let the cat out!" you yelled, pointing over to Ryan, Ben, and Mike. "Alex loved that cat! And you people treated him and Alex both like shit! She is not going to live with this for the rest of her life!"

Your mom looked over to the three boys. They had stopped wrestling, fearing that they would get in trouble. But of course, we all knew that that was impossible. It was Tyler to the rescue.

"Aww, come on! It's good riddance to that lame cat! Now we can get a dog!" all the boys cheered, and our mom smiled over at them lovingly. I almost puked.

You felt so bad for Alex. She was going to take Scotti with us to England. But seeing how the poor cat was no more than roadkill because of your ass of a family, she couldn't anymore. You'd buy her a new pet soon enough though.

"See…that's exactly the kind of shit I'm talking about!" I yelled. My mom was about to protest, but I interrupted her. I needed to get all this built up anger off of my chest. "Ever since dad died, everything has changed for the worst! This house, this family, and especially you! You're too caught up in your own life and Tyler and his three son-of-a-bitch sons that you've completely disregarded me and Alex. It's like your trying to rid everything that reminds you of dad out of your life! And it's fucking working, because I fucking hate you and want nothing to do with you anymore! I'm not going to England for college, mom, I'm going to England for life! I'm going to live there and never come back! And I'm taking Alex with me!"

My mother was frozen in shock. But it wasn't one of understanding, it was of fear. She didn't feel sorry for me, want to apologize to me, or want to tell me how much she always has loved me. She was afraid that I was going to leap across the kitchen and punch her right across her face. She feared me, and I kinda liked it.

"HEY!" Tyler interjected. "Don't talk to your mother like that!" Yet again, another pathetic attempt to be a father. Now it was his turn for my fire.

"Shut the fuck up! You mean nothing to me! You're not my father and you never will be! So don't tell me what the fuck to do! I'm eighteen, I'm a legal adult, I don't need to deal with this crap anymore. I'm gaining full custody of Alex, and you" I turned towards my mom "are going to hand her right over to me, no questions asked! She deserves a better life than this. And besides, what the hell do you care. It'll be like I'm taking out that thorn in your side that you've been forced to live with for the past 6 years of your life. Cause in retrospect, that's all me and Alex have ever been to you…thorns in your side."

My mom glared at me. I tried to find of a sliver of something that resembled love in her eyes, but I saw nothing. I could tell that she just wanted to be done with me so that she could move on wit her life. Maybe something about me reminded her of my dad. Who knows though…I didn't really care.

"Fine." She said at last. "I'll go get her paper work for you…"

I nodded. "We're leaving in two days." I said.

"You had this all planned?" your mom asked. I nodded again. "Well…good. You take her with you to England…and I never want to see either of you again in this house."

I smirked triumphantly and turned back around to go upstairs.

"Hah! Good luck on your own, kid. You'll never make it by yourself…and it's gonna be our mom sayin 'I told you so' next year when you show up on our doorstep, begging for money."

I laughed. "Tyler, not only are you a waste of a life, but you're completely wrong. If it's one thing you'll never have to worry about, it's me coming back into this shithole."

That was only two days ago. And to think…here I finally am. All dressed, packed up, and ready to go to England. Now began phase two of my life makeover.

I wouldn't go back home begging for money. No…I would go to England and make something of myself. I would prove to everyone that I could be successful on my own and didn't need their help. All I needed was my little sister and Susan.

Even though my heart still was left behind Narnia, I would move on from all that. I would be strong like Susan when she was taken away from her home. I could do this…It may take awhile, but I could learn to let go of all the things I loved ever so dearly in that other world.

I could let go of Caspian…right?

I could let go of the way he used to be so overprotective of me and refused to let me leave my room in the castle or leave the How when they were at war. I could let go of the way his risked his very own existence as the new King of Narnia to save me from my captured state in the snake's Third Allusion. I could let go of the way his naked body had molded into mind when we…

I didn't want anyone else but him. I still don't. But I really don't have a choice.

I had nothing left of him to remember him by. But maybe that was for the best. I still had his sword, but there is no way in hell that I would be able to take that one the plane with me. That's why the other day I visited the tree that brought me to Narnia. I placed the sword at its base. I knew it would be safe there.

I looked down to Alex. She had just finished tying her shoes and looked like she was ready.

"Ready to go?" I asked her.

"Yeah!" she squealed, jumping up and down. I smiled at her excitement and started jumping up and down too. Her happiness was contagious.

"Alright let's go…but remember" I said as a put a finger to my mouth. "Be quiet." It's not like I was afraid of waking up my mom and Tyler because they wouldn't let us leave, I just didn't want to have to deal with any of them when my freedom was right around the corner.

I packed our bags into my car. I didn't bothering to tell the boys about me driving the car to the airport just so I could go on a plane and let it sit there till someone picked it up. It was my car and I could drive it wherever I wanted. I'd never be seeing it again anyways, so what did it matter to me if it rotted in the airport parking lot? I did love the old car, but I needed to let go. I cut off my insurance for it because I didn't plan on driving it anymore. It the boys want it so bad, they can pick it up themselves…and then get pulled over for driving without insurance…hehe.

"Alright, it looks like we're all set." I said as I buckled my seat belt. "You ready to go to England!" Alex cheered.

"Yeah! I'm so excited!"

"And I just can't hide it!" I began to sing. And together we sang the rest of the song, and many more, as we made our way to the airport. However, there was one tiny detour we would have to take along the way.

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Alex stood in front of the tombstone, unaware of what she was supposed to be seeing.

"Dan…Ebony." She read. I patted her shoulder, congratulating her ability to read. She was only just learning, after all. "Who's he?" she asked.

"That's…our real dad." I replied. "Remember the time we were moving in with Tyler? Do you remember what I said to you?" She nodded.

"Listen, Alex…" I began. "What I am about to tell you, you cannot…I repeat CANNOT tell anyone. It's a secret just between the two of us. You CANNOT let mommy or Tyler know I told you, alright?" I asked her.

"Jade, why don't you call him daddy? Why do you call him Tyler?" she asked.

"Because he's not our dad." I said bluntly. I wanted to drop the bomb more gently, but I was in a very bitter mood at the moment. She was six…she would understand that much.

Alex's eyes widening, kind of like the time that I accidentally mentioned the fact that Santa Clause didn't exist.

"Daddy's…not daddy?" she asked sadly.

"No…" I said equally as sadly back.

"But, if daddy's not daddy then who-"

"Shh!" I hushed her as I heard footsteps coming up the stairs. "Listen, Al…I'll explain it all to you some other day, I promise! But you have to promise me that you wont tell anyone what I said ok!?"

"Well, I was telling you the truth. Tyler's not our real father, and Ryan, Ben, and Mike aren't our real brothers. Your last name isn't Hacker…it's Ebony. Dan Ebony…he was your real father. But he died before you were even born." I signed at the look on her face. It was understandable, though, seeing as she had been lied to her whole life. "I'm sorry…I should have waiting to tell you when you're older but…I…I wanted you to at least have visited him before we leave."

And much to me surprise, Alex turned around to me and hugged my leg. I guess it was a mixture of both happiness, gratefulness, and sadness. I couldn't hear any sobs, so that was a good thing. I didn't expect her to cry though, I mean she never met the guy. But still, it must hurt to know of a better and happier life that she could have had. I knew that feeling all too well. Hopefully Alex wouldn't make those same stupid mistakes that I had.

"Jade." She mumble.

"Yes, hun?"

She looked up at me. "Do you have pictures of daddy?" I smiled.

"A bunch. But I saved them for the plane ride." I said.

She instantly let go of me and started jumping up and down once more. "Then what are we waiting for?!" she yelled.

I laughed as she made a mad dash to the car. However, she stopped halfway and turned back around running back to the tombstone. She knelt down beside it, gave our father's name a light peck, and then ran back the way she had been. I smiled wholeheartedly before saying my own farewell to our father.

I laid my hand down on top of the stone and knelt down so that I was eye level with my dad's name.

"I love you so much dad…and I'll always miss you. But don't worry about me. I'll take care of myself and Alex. Trust me. Please have faith in me…and watch over us." I said as I single tear trickled down my face. "Thank you for everything…and Goodbye."

Mimicing Alex, I gave the tombstone a quick peck before making my way back to the car. I only looked back once.

"Here's to our new life…"

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