Colours in the Darkness

-Written by: Fluffychocolate-

If you asked a blind person: Would you do anything for you sight back? Most would answer: Yes, I'd do anything. There are the other people though; who wouldn't do anything but would still like their sight back. And then there are the people who don't want their sight back. I, Sawada Tsunayoshi, am one of those people. If I didn't however lose my sight at fourteen, I don't think I would still have the same point of view. It's been two years, since I never saw people's faces. Two years since I saw clouds, rain and thunder. Two years since I've seen the sun, animals. In these two completely pitch black years, I've learnt how to judged people of their true natures.

My life didn't change drastically, didn't change painfully, it just ran on a bumpier track. Before I lost my sight, I was called Dame-Tsuna. I sucked at sports, failed every test, was an extremely clumsy person, never had good luck and wasn't even good looking. I had no special traits, none at all. I could trip over air, run across the whole town screaming because a Chihuahua barked at me, couldn't do anything right.

The only reason why I even bothered coming to school was because Kyoko-chan was there; that beautiful, innocent angel. She was kind, a little dense, but she didn't point and laugh, like all the others. Instead she offered a hand and smiled. Sasagawa Kyoko was Nami-chuu's cutest girl. I, on the other hand was the school's loser. No, I didn't stand a chance. You see, all this stress can lead up to suicidal situations.

I wanted to die.

Pathetic isn't it? Only fourteen and he wants to die because he was a total loser in school. Anyways, I wanted to die, so I tried. I tried choking myself with rope; however I got all tangled up ten times in a row. I tried to drown in a lake; a hiker found me and rescued me. I tried to take an overdose; I took the vitamins instead of the medication. All these were just some examples of what I did while I was fourteen. However, the last attempt, which was trying to poison myself, resulted in my lost of sight.

I was on a chair, grabbing the poison bottle. Then I, being the clumsy person I was, didn't grab it properly. I fell; it fell with me and landed on my face, spattering the poison into my eyes. Okaa-san told me I was screaming and yelling, writhing on the floor in pain. She called the ambulance right away, but it was too late.

My eyes itself were okay, but all the nerves that sent the messages to the brain were infected. They couldn't stop the pain, something with the anesthetic reacting with the poisons chemicals and making more pain. After a few hours of screaming my lungs hoarse I passed out; due to the pain obviously. They made me sleep for a few days, Okaa-san sat by me the whole time. I heard even Otou-san came in and visited me from halfway across the world.

During that period of time when I was in a coma-like state, I dreamt. I dreamt of people getting killed, of people singing and laughing, of people crying and mourning. Then last of all I dreamt of nine people, they called themselves the previous Vongola bosses, they claimed that I was next. All of them had a flame on their forehead, all orange and flickering continuously. They claimed that I was going to be Vongola Tenth, and that I will have to witness all that, cause it, and accept the responsibility. Or die. After they all finished talking and asked me what I wanted, of course I refused.

I remembered exactly what I'd said: "No, no…NO! I'D RATHER FUCKING DIE LIKE I WAS PLANNING TOO! AND IF I CAN'T EVEN DO THAT THEN I'LL JUST BRING THIS VONGOLA DOWN, I'LL DIE TRYING!" I'd never swore in my life, that was my first. The rest of them however did not seem surprised.

The black area had transformed into a grand white hall. At the very end of the long blue carpet was a throne-like chair. In their sat someone who rather suspiciously looked like me, except older, more sophisticated, with longer blondish hair. He also had a flame on his forehead. His was the biggest and purest, I knew he had power.

"Sawada Tsunayoshi, I am Giotto, Vongola First. And you, are the first to past the Vongola trial as the youngest in history, as the one who had no prior training, and also as one of the best. When you wake up, you will have proof. Do not take the wrong choices. After all, you are my reincarnation,"

I woke up, and all I saw was black. A never ending void of black, of nothing. Something amazing happened straight afterwards, a spark of yellow ignited on my left. It was familiar, warm and comforting. It reminded me of Okaa-san. At that time I wasn't scared, I was curious as a matter of fact, so I called out her name.

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"O-Okaa-san?"

"Ah! Tsu-kun?? Are you awake? Does it hurt? Tsu-kun!"

"I-I'm fine…I d-don't think-k my e-eyes are w-wo-working-g,"

"O-oh, OH TSU-KUN!" I was nearly tackled over by the force that hurled into my chest. I wrapped my arms around her tentatively.

"Okaa-san calm down,"

"T-TSU-KUN-N, MOKASHAN BWAS SCHOU BWARRIED!" Her voice was muffled against my hospital shirt, the tears leaked through the thin material.

"It's alright Okaa-san, it's alright,"

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I spent that night cradling her in my arms, though it should've been the other way round. I can still hear her voice, full of pain and anguish. Guilt.

You might think that two years is a short period of time, but when the only thing you see if black and hovering bursts of certain colours, it feels like ages.

Straight after that incident, with only a few hours to recuperate in my assigned room, I was sent to a doctor. Dr. Kawashima was my personal doctor. I still come to see him for check-ups. From there, he discussed my future; at that time I thought I didn't have a future.

I spent another day or two in the hospital, learning the basics of how to move around and all that. My nurse was Ms. Miura, she always chattered to me about her wonderful daughter while she helped me out. Our first meeting consisted of me not stuttering for once- a miracle which I found out afterwards that whenever I can't see people like I am now I don't stutter like I used to-, her bringing my hands up to her face to 'see' it and a bright blue flame shining in front of me. Flicking, but never wavering.

We spent our time moving around a lot so I can get used to using my instincts like a real blind person and moving out of the way. Those lessons didn't go really well. I also got started on Braille; those lessons were dreadful. But, we did learn a few important and special things about my new abilities which replaced the lost. I had impressive skills as an artist, my marvelous life-saving instincts and my other unique way of seeing.

It was never explainable, just came and goes, hard to control. During the past few years I have managed to control it quite effectively, but not perfectly. This was how it happened. I was walking back from the hospital toilets when I heard a small 'eep' and the fluttering sound of papers a few metres in front of me. Slowly I saw outlines in the darkness, faded outlines. Not thinking twice I'd bent down immediately to help her out.

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"Here you go Miss," I shyly muttered.

"Ah thank you!" I could roughly find her face in the blurry lines, she shone a bright red flamed in the middle of her chest.

"What a lovely girl, all the kids these days are so irresponsible!" She clicked her tongue, brushing down her clothes. "Oh! What beautiful eyes you have, were you born like that?"

"Girl? I'm a boy…" I had paused momentarily, beautiful eyes? I just had normal plain brown eyes, I voiced my question.

"Ah, sorry my darling! You're so cute. Yes your eyes are such a wonderful shade of orange, simply breath-taking,"

"Really? I thought I had brown eyes…" I frowned, when did they change? Wait a minute, can they even change?

"Thought?" The nurse asked baffled.

"Oh, I just turned blind a few days ago,"

"A few days ago? Oh my, are you that boy that wanted to poison himself? Why on Earth would you do that?!"

"I-"

"Life is a rare thing. You only live once, don't go and throw it away, you are more lucky than all the other people out there!" She scolded; her flame grew bigger, spat out sparks.

The tears came, "N-No one needs me; I'm just a useless rag lying in their way!"

Her eyes softened, before sharpening with such determination I had never seen before. "No one? IMPOSSIBLE! There will always be someone later in your life that you will meet that will hang onto you like life support. They may not show it, but they will feel it. What do you think you will cause them by suicide! A boy like you should not give up on like so early, you still have so many things to experience, to live to the fullest of your capabilities, why go and destroy all that?

"B-but, I can't do anything right. No one wants me; they don't even want to say they know me. It's so lonely, so painful!"

I cried, cried my eyes out since I lost their use, I let it all out. The kind nurse held me, she made me realize, that someday I would be needed and wanted in this world. Accepted.

"If you can't do anything right, learn. If you are lonely go and find someone, something even, it doesn't matter. With a kind soul like yours there will surely be at least one person out there, waiting. Do not lose hope child, do not."

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Afterwards, when I had cleaned up properly she made me promise. So I did, I promised, and at that very moment l learnt a few more things: First was kind deeds will always be rewarded. Second was people with the red coloured flame were like storms, they raged on and on until they were satisfied. Third was I now had breath-taking orange coloured eyes. Fourth was everyone had a type of flame, sometimes they are so small I can't see them. Fifth was that I was not a useless rag lying in peoples way. Sixth was someday I was going to be important to people, other than Okaa-san and Otou-san. Seventh was to never lose hope. Eighth was that strange ability of seeing. If I concentrated hard enough I could produce a faint picture in my head. Very faint though. I heard from Ms Miura that before I obtained this skill I just had plain ordinary brown eyes. Isn't it strange?

This skill proved to be most useful. I could navigate my way round and act like a completely normal person, but it wearied me out incredibly quickly. The other one that we found out I could use after a year or so was my natural instinct of survival. All humans had it like a built in system, mine was just super sensitive after being poisoned. When in dire need of surviving, it pops out, out of nowhere and gets into action. Turns out I turn serious and all 'professional' at least Okaa-san described it that way. She also described it as charming, graceful, amazing, cool, handsome, and much more. All that actually made me a bit proud.

So, in these two years, I've lived in solitude. Well you get what I mean. It was peaceful really; I didn't care so long as I was happy. Which I was, until Okaa-san just announced something…

"Okaa-san….explain to me one more time- clearly - why I have to return to Nami-chuu…"

"Because Tsu-kunnnn~! You can't stay cooped up in here forever, you have to go meet your friends again! You have to go urm, spend more time with people, and socialize!"

"Okaa-san in case you haven't noticed I socialize quite a lot,"

"But that's birds, squirrels, mice, fish and shopkeepers!" Okaa-san whined and clung onto my arm, and bit it.

"Okaa-san! Don't bite me, you are the one telling me to be more mature all the time and look at you!"

"Well I never said I was mature or that I needed to become mature…"

I sighed heavily; time to do this the hard way. "Okaa-san, it's not like I can't go back…it's that I don't want to go back, bad memories."

Okaa-san suddenly sobered up, I never told her about the bullying till after I lost my sight. So she roared, and raged and rambled. I nearly got ripped to pieces. One rule with Sawada Nana, never ever get her cut at you. It's instant painful punishment(s).

"Tsu-kun…you WILL go back to Nanimori High school. That is THAT. No bargains, no changes, and strictly no pleading."

"Okaa-san, you've got to understand. That has got to be the most painful place to be!"

I turned on my other sight, and spotted tears, but she had her determined face on; no one was going to stop her. I embraced her gently, "Can I think about it at least then?"

"Thank you Tsu-kun, you need to get over the fear of Nami-chuu,"

"I said I'd think about it 'Kaa-san, not that I'd go,"

Sawada Nana, the wife of Sawada Iemitsu, my mother, has got to be one of the best women on earth. She was a woman who didn't ask questions when I didn't want questions asked. A wonderful and responsible mother, as Otou-san says. There are times when she isn't though, and this is one. Even though Elementary school and Junior High school is compulsory, High school is not. Since I was just 14 when I got blind, I missed out on around two years in Nami-chuu. I did make it up however with home tutors, which easily gave up on me. I think I have marks better than when I was Dame-Tsuna but still… The only home tutor that stayed longer than three months passed away last year, I was devastated.

Staying at home can prevent having a lot of friends, not that I had any before the accident anyways. The only communication I had with people then was either: orders or bullying. Although now that I think about it… I think the school's greatest athlete did talk to me and stand up for me a few times. That was only because of his happy and carefree nature.

So the thought of being sent back to Nami-chuu frightened me to the bottom of my dull soul. I had to think of some excuses before the next Monday! My tutor was due in 20 minutes, I had some time to relax and sketch a bit.

Okaa-san had left the room while I was deep in thought, leaving a bunch of cookies, I think. I flashed my other sight on and found out it was mini choc-chip cookies. Happily I chucked some into my mouth while I searched for my sketch book. That's odd; didn't I leave it on the coffee table? Sighing I went through my day's activities. Oh! I remember now, the book was on the top of the TV. Leaning over the small table I turned off my sight, Okaa-san told me to not rely on it too much as I might lose the skill at any time.

The front cover of the book was plain black; in the centre was a crest of some organization I saw on Otou-san's desk, it was in a brown-crème type colour so it stood out. The crest was an odd yet graceful one. It had a bullet in the centre of a long hexagon box, above it the centres of two guns placed diagonally. The handles of the guns are also diagonal to the hexagon thing. There was a pair of small wings cradled in between the two guns, in the middle of that was a clam. Surrounding the whole thing was a flame or wave-like thick vines. On the bottom of the box was the flame things placed so it was horizontally straight with little curls on the end.

Really I don't know what on Earth made me use this for the front but oh well. Slowly and carefully I lifted the cover, revealing a bright green chameleon with yellow beady eyes. In the background there was a light shade of blue, growing slightly darker as it spread. This picture was inspired quite a long time ago, when I just received the notebook. My pictures don't come from things I like; it's like my mind takes over by itself and draws whatever it wants.

The next page was a portrait of a silver haired boy, he had had piercings and gothic jewelry; very gothic. He looked Italian, with a stand-offish look, authority surrounding him like the paparazzi. His green eyes were staring out of the page in a bored manner, his background was red.

Yellow flew all over the place as I stared at the next picture. This guy had grayish white hair, his eyes gleamed with anticipation? He had boxing gloves on, an extremely excited grin covered nearly his whole face, and he wanted a fight. Right next to his left eyebrow was a small scar running from his scalp to around the level of his eyelid. On the bridge of his nose laid a white band-aid sort of thing.

When I draw my conscious goes into a daze, I usually don't recognize what I've drawn until I finished. The picture after the 'extreme' looking guy had my jaw on the ground for ages. It was Yamamoto Takeshi, the athlete that actually helped me out in school. I'd drawn his normal grinning self on the top half of the page. On the bottom half he was dead serious, emitting a murderous aura. And that, as far as I'm concerned would not happen unless something very bad happened. I'm not sure it could even happen.

Yamamoto-san has short black hair, long elegant eyebrows and high cheekbones. He is much taller than me and is obsessed with baseball; it's his life. His school marks aren't that good, but not bad like mine. The school believes that he can be a smart guy if he concentrates less on baseball. All attempts of trying to get his thoughts away from that have failed every single time. He also has a trait of smiling all the time. Whether it be small or impossibly wide. The only times that he doesn't is when he's amazed, shocked to a certain degree and when he's sad. The background was in all possible shades of blue.

The next was quite…creepy. It was drawn in indigo, looking like a stain on the white. This picture was only roughly sketched and shaded, lines faded into the pure blinding white. You can make out tubes circling and entering a man- everywhere- , one tube struck right into his right eye. His body was in a kind of curled up position, face peaceful, a little bit pained. Besides from the tubes, it seemed like that he was in a tank, a never ending tank that is deep and black. Strangely I felt a surge of protectiveness for this man, whoever he was. I'm positive I'll meet him sometime in my life.

Shuddering I flipped it over quickly, only to reveal a drawing in green pastel. It was comical, a drawing of a lightning bolt straight in the middle, and a cow right underneath it. A cow with an afro… None of it was coloured in at all.

Suddenly I remembered, if I don't start drawing I won't be able to make finish in time for tutor. I hurriedly flipped to the marked page, sat on the couched comfortably and sighed, silently closing my eyes and detaching myself from the world. I could feel the entire lot strings break off, I was left floating. From my mind I could feel myself reaching for black and various shades of purple. Then my wrist was on the paper and smoothly drawing what seemed to be the shape of a head.

Minutes later I could see cold glaring blue gray eyes, an extremely stoic look, but the image was not completed yet. My fingers deftly switched colours, I started on the hair. Somewhere in the back of my mind I heard the door opening and closing, I paid no attention. Whenever I started if I don't finish I won't get back out of my daze. Whoever it was could wait, they were early after all.

The finished picture was oddly…intimidating. He was familiar, but I couldn't put my finger on it. The guy had purple surrounding him in flames, and a yellow stout bird on his shoulder. He wore Nami-chuu's uniform, with a jacket on top. And the jacket had a red armband that said: Disciplinary Leader. Oh my god, it was Hibari Kyoya! The most feared guy in Nanimori, why on earth did my mind go and draw that?!

I heard an amused chuckle as I closed the book quickly; imagine someone spotting me drawing HIBARI KYOYA! But what I saw was not what I expected. Instead of a man, there was a small baby with a fedora hat which had an orange band. He was dressed in a mini suit, expensive at that too. His eyes were deadly, even though covering it was a perfect mask of innocence. He was to be feared. I flicked off my sight then acted like people expected me too.

"Who's there?" I faked curiosity.

"Don't lie to me, it won't work," a baby voice said, a second later I was kicked, sprawled out against the sofa.

"Ow… what was that for?" Jeez I was right, this baby had super powers, "Wait a minute, what are you doing here anyway? And why do you sound like a baby?"

"I told you already, there's no point lying to me," Smash, I landed on the small stool.

"What are you talking about?! If you don't know already I'm blind!"

"Lie to me one more time and I'll kill you," I felt a bit of the killer intent seeping out.

"Alright, alright," At least I got what I wanted; he was a person to be feared even though he had the body of an infant. Underneath all the scariness was a wise soul, it was old. He couldn't be only one or two that would be impossible. Then again…

"Oi what are you thinking about Sawada Tsunayoshi?"

"Why are you here?"

"I'm your new tutor,"

"Excuse me? Are you trying to mock me? I may be blind but you're no older than three!"

"See? I knew you were lying before,"

"Damn,"

"Tsu-kun~! I forgot to tell you, the other tutor is in rehabilitation for some reason, so you'll be having a new tutor~!" Okaa-san sang from the kitchen.

"Okaa-san it seems like he's already here,"

"Really Tsu-kun? I must be so rude!" Her footsteps rang on the floor, each step closer than the other towards the living room.

"Sawada Nana, I'm Reborn the new tutor,"

"Uwahh! Why you are so small, and cute! How did you start life so quickly?"

"Okaa-san obviously it would've been impossible, HE'S A FAKE I TELL YOU!" My real intention was to get rid of the dangerous thing that looked and like a baby. Unfortunately, the kid seemed to be intelligent as well, he must be some sort of mutant!

"Sawada-san, as the contract stated, until your son's test scores and social life rises I'll be staying here," The one-year old stated with a glint in his eyes. Oh I won't get defeated by just that!

"Okaa-san, how do you expect a kid to teach me social interaction? What happened to the Mr. Kasora by the way?"

"Oh Tsu-kun~! Don't you see! If a baby actually got the job of a tutor and started out so early in life he must be a genius! The fee is cheap, just another person living in the house! And Mr. Kasora is very unfortunate~!"

"Unfortunate?"

"Yes unfortunate~! He got drowned in a river because he was drunk~!"

"Okaa-san don't say that with such a happy face!"

"Tsu-kun, and Reborn-kun Okaa-san will be heading off to buy more food to feed you~! I'll be right back soon~! Until then make yourself at home Reborn-kun~! You can sleep in Tsu-kun's room~!" She dashed out the door like a madman to get to the sales. Leaving me with a superhuman baby, oh how responsible was that?

"Tsuna, let me see your sketch book,"

"Tsuna? No, the books private, especially to suspicious babies like you,"

"Where did you see the emblem from?

"Oh that, it was on one of Otou-san's papers from work,"

"That stupid Iemitsu…" He muttered words that I couldn't hear properly.

"Let me see now or I'll burn it while you're sleeping,"

"HIIII? That's not fair!"

"Life never was, get used to it," With that he grabbed my book, settle down comfortably on a green sofa which appeared out of nowhere and ordered a latte with two sugars. As I was preparing the coffee I thought about ways to convince Okaa-san not to send me to Nami-chuu again, but came up with nothing what-so-ever.

Coffee in hand I made my way back carefully, and then an absolutely BRILLIANT idea popped into my head. Plopping the coffee onto the table I sat opposite of Reborn, waiting patiently. The baby in his suit just flipped the pages calmly. After scanning through all the pictures he placed it down and took a sip, murmuring in approval. Of the taste or the pictures I don't know.

"The chameleon, where did you get the idea?" I knew he would ask that first, it looks exactly like his one after all.

"I didn't,"

Reborn cocked his tiny eyebrow, gesturing for me to continue.

"I don't know what or when I want to draw; my mind does it on its own,"

"Interesting, how about the portraits, any of them you know?"

"Yamamoto Takeshi and Hibari Kyoya, I've barely ever talked to them before,"

"Hm, I'm taking it they go to Nami-chuu?"

"Yeah, about that… do you think you could do me a favour Reborn?"

"It depends,"

"I just need you to make Okaa-san not send me back there,"

"Why not?"

"There is no way, am I going back to that torture place,"

"Torture place?"

"Yes torture place, I'd rather not go into details,"

"You are the one asking for help you know,"

There was a brief silence, "Fine,"

From there I explained how my elementary and junior high school went. I cringed myself at how pathetic my life story was. All about how I was useless, a mere everyday object in someone else's view, not even alive. Reborn's eyes never changed from its normal look, but I could feel pity somewhere deep down his obsidian pools.

When I finished, Okaa-san just came home. Reborn said he'd think about my deal but told me he had to go somewhere outside first. I was extremely curious to what a baby figure would do at night by himself. But I stayed home and went to have a wash.

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Hot water cascaded down my muscles, passed over my eyelids, my body relaxed nearly instantly. And like my usual schedule, I cried. It was something that always happened; all the bad memories would come back as soon as the soothing water hit my back for a few seconds. Okaa-san wouldn't find out because of the water covering my sniffles and my red puffy eyes didn't seem that suspicious after a shower.

It was relief, to shove it out and let my feelings flow, before having to block the river again. If I left it blocked for too long, it would burst, I would go all over the place. So to insure that wouldn't happen, I did this on a regular basis.

My stomach growled impatiently as I wiped the last tears off my eyes. Time to go out, eat and think of another backup plan just in case Reborn didn't help out; that wouldn't be too good. Sounds of laughter came from the kitchen; did Otou-san come home?

"Oh Reborn-kun you are so charming!" Okaa-san held her cheeks and blushed like a school girl.

"It's a skill,"

"Okaa-san… I think I smell food burning," I stated as I pulled out a chair and sat down.

"Oh my~! I got carried away~!"

"Reborn, I thought you were going out?"

"I did,"

"What did you do?" I couldn't help but ask.

"I reported to someone,"

"Reported?!"

"Yes reported,"

Okaa-san pranced to the table with food, more than usual today, "Food's here~!"

"Thanks Okaa-san,"

Everyone dug in, Okaa-san was much more lively than before, Reborn wasn't one to disappoint it seems.

"Maman your food is delicious, Iemitsu chose a good wife," Reborn said as he finished his second bowl of rice.

"Oh did he really say that~!" Okaa-san went back into a trance.

"You know Otou-san Reborn?"

"Yes,"

"How?"

"Maman, you are sending Tsuna back to school no?" He changed the subject quite suddenly and I was confused for a second. A second too late.

"Why yes of course! The school just rang to say that you can come back on the 20th of April Tsu-kun~!"

"This Monday?" I asked, mentally calculating the days. Reborn bet me to it.

"The day after tomorrow,"

"HIIII? Okaa-san, do I have to go? I won't survive you know it Okaa-san! I'll probably go and commit suicide and this time I'll lose a leg instead!"

Okaa-san's face turned serious, and unmerciful, "You are NOT allowed to talk about suicide EVER again,"

"A-ah…" I sighed in defeat, "Hai Okaa-san,"

"He truly did choose a great wife,"

"Ahh~! You don't need to complement me so much Reborn-kun~!"

"I'm only stating the truth,"

"Such a charming boy~, you should learn Reborn's manners Tsu-kun!"

"Okaa-san! He's a baby! Don't make me sound so weak!" I yelled, but they were already ignoring my existence.

She laughed and went back to eating. The rest of dinner went past is a similar way, Okaa-san laughing, me asking questions and complaining, and Reborn shoving things in my face. It was nice, not just me and Okaa-san having brief short talks. However, it felt like he was going to stay for a long while, very long. I just had a feeling, he'll be staying whether you like it or not, and along with that strange feeling, there was a weak signal of distress. Danger. I just shrugged it off, I've already made thousands of mistakes, another wouldn't hurt that much.

Reborn slept in my room that night, snoring softly in his hammock. I remember laying here, staring at the ceiling, my inner sense told me that my life was going to change starting today; something that can't be reversed. I was excited, yet nervous, anxious. I fell asleep before I knew it, thinking about one thing: Vongola.
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Uh...my first time writing here, or anywhere on the internet in fact.

The pairings will- hopefully- appear depending on how long I will continue with Amano Akira's original plot. For example if I decided that this, with all my other stuff, is too much stress than I might just finish off in the middle of nowhere.

I'll continue writing if I get some kind of response, though i'm pretty sure I won't. Tsuna will meet Hibari in the next chapter, if i decide to write it, and enter his normal school classes again. Anyhows, review please! Onegaishimasu.