Summary: Upon having a rat literally fall into their laps, Lily and Alice decide he needs to look a bit nicer. But whose rat could it be? And what chaos will he create?
Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter, or the marauders (no matter how nice that would be).
Saving Peter
a Siriusly Klutzy story
"What's this little thing?" Lily overheard a small first year girl say. There was a bit of rummaging around, probably to get a better look, and then the girl's friend responded.
"It's a rat!" she shrieked. Lily saw the second girl leap from her position on the floor and onto the squishy arm chair in one swift motion when the first girl picked the rat up by its tail.
"It is!" the first girl exclaimed in awe before launching it right onto Alice's lap.
The two girls continued squealing, one dancing on the chair, the other frantically waving her hands about in a get-this-rodent's-bloody-contamination-off-me motion. A couple second year boys who were sitting close were opening laughing, one pointing at the girl on the chair and telling her that she would do fabulously in the ballet. Quite obviously, she ignored him.
Alice was now the one who picked up the shaking rat by its tail. She leaned in closely, peering at him through narrowed eyes. "I know you," she said, speaking to the rat who was hanging helplessly upside down.
"What was that?" Lily asked, tearing her gaze from the mocking boys and dancing girls.
"This rat," Alice answered. "I've seen it before. It's got this marking above its ear that looks like a bludger."
"You study rats now?" Lily asked, slightly distracted by the argument across the room and therefore only partially paying attention to what Alice was saying.
"No, no. This rat ran across the dinner table once and landed in Evan McGray's soup. It was a memorable moment." Alice nodded fondly before going back to observing the rat. It was staring at her through beady eyes, but looked properly frightened.
"Is it a student's?"
"Yeah…. Yeah, I think it's…." She furrowed her eyebrows for a moment, concentrating on the rat dangling in front of her. "It's James's! James Potter! This is his rat!"
Lily snorted. "James doesn't have a rat."
"Yes he does!" Alice countered. "He does, and this is it! I know this, Lily. He made Sirius scoop it out of the soup!"
Lily stared at the rat momentarily, and then looked back up at Alice. "You're sure this is Potter's rat?"
"Positive."
"I think he needs a little decoration."
"Have either of you guys seen Peter?" Remus asked. He had just finished looking under Sirius's bed (a nightmarish place that no one ever wished to visit) and emerged rubbing his jaw. "I haven't seen him since Charms."
"Wasn't he going to the Common Room for something?" James suggested, barely looking up from his Quidditch: Today, Tomorrow, and Forever magazine. "Like a… I don't know."
"I think he mentioned something like that," Sirius agreed. He was lying on his own bed, flicking his wand carelessly and shooting objects across the room to collide with the side of James's head. "Or he wanted to go see something. Or something."
"Do you pay attention to what he says? Ever?" Remus asked. He rolled his eyes. When the boys replied "No" in unison, he sat on his own bed and retrieved a very heavy looking book entitled Getting to Know Your Werewolf, a sarcastic gift from Sirius that past Christmas.
Smirking, the two girls placed the rat gently in the center of the square they created out of their text books. He scurried in a circle, searching for a way out. When he found none, he started scratching at the binding of Lily's Potions book.
"Oi, stop that," she ordered, glaring down at the rat. He stopped immediately after seeing the glare she shot him and then stood in the middle of the square, staring up expectantly as if waiting for his next order.
Alice chuckled. "All right," she said, pulling out her wand and tapping it against her chin. "Now. What does he look like he needs?"
"We can give him this." Lily flicked her wand and an actual size Gryffindor scarf fell on top of the rat. Signs of escape were evident from the continuously moving scarlet and gold bulge. "Whoops," she said, correcting herself and a rather nice rat-sized scarf replaced the large one.
"Much better. Good idea. Got to keep up the Gryffindor spirit." Alice nodded and flicked her own wand causing a small beret to land on the rat's head. He shook his head repetitively, but the hat would not come off.
"Lovely," Lily said.
They continued adding things to the poor rat. (Lily, a bow tie, a pair of spectacles, and very tiny, very high pumps; Alice, a lovely purple tutu, an earring for his left ear, and, to go with the shoes, a nice shade of lilac nail polish.) He tried to escape by climbing up the walls (this time using Alice's books to avoid the Wrath of Lily) but was unsuccessful with every try.
"Poor little bugger," Alice said sympathetically when she conjured the earring. "Shame he had to be James's rat."
"Nonsense, James will love it!" Lily said happily, the smile on her face growing wider with every spell.
"And are you going to be the one that gives it to him?" Alice asked mischievously.
Lily laughed. "Yeah. Right, Alice."
"Well I'd have figured that ever since you started to fan-"
"Shh!" Lily cut her off anxiously. "Not in front of the rat!" she hissed. Alice gave her a peculiar look.
"Why?"
"He might hear us!" Lily continued to whisper.
"Oh, Merlin…"
"Alice! I wouldn't put it past James to have his pets bugged," Lily said. She looked down at the rat who appeared to actually be listening quite closely to what they had to say. "Look at him!"
"You're being ridiculous. Not even James would bug his pet because maybe, just maybe, you would kidnap it and dress it in funny outfits. I think you're being a bit paranoid."
"I'm not being paranoid!" Alice raised an eyebrow. "Okay. Maybe I am a bit, but it's James Potter. It can't be pure coincidence that we chose his rat, of all the rats in Hogwarts."
"Er, Lily, would we have dressed up any other rat in Hogwarts?"
Lily glared at her friend, but agreed. This was a spur of the moment thing, and probably wouldn't happen to anyone else's rat.
Alice shook her hands and continued from her thought from earlier. "Anyway, I just figured that you'd embrace the opportunity to see him again." She became thoughtful for a moment. "Who knows," she continued, waggling her eyebrows, "he might be in his boxers."
Lily blinked at Alice, trying very, very hard to get the mental image out of her head, but failing. "If that's the case, then there's no way I'm bringing him!" Lily folded her arms triumphantly.
The rat was looking curiously up between the two girls, wondering if he would ever get home.
"I'm sure it would be such a shame to have to see that." Alice was a horrible mate, Lily decided after that. A truly horrible mate who should only have to meet the fate of James Clad in Boxers with her.
She would not do it alone. She absolutely would not.
Someone would have to drag her stunned body out of the dorm for she would faint, and she assumed those stairs would be painful to go down. Especially on her head. But she would not do it alone.
He wasn't in boxers. In fact, James Potter was fully clothed, doing the exact same thing as he was an hour ago. Sitting on his bed, reading Quidditch: Today, Tomorrow, and Forever. Sirius had ceased shooting things and James and instead switched his target to Remus, who had stopped reading Getting to Know Your Werewolf after it suggested he set up a camera to get a proper look at his tail.
"You aren't concerned about Peter's whereabouts at all, are you?" he asked before sending the book towards Sirius's head, only to swerve out of the way at the last second.
"Not particularly, no," Sirius answered. He stared at the spot where the book had made contact with his headboard. "That could have been my head, you know." He thrust his thumb over his shoulder to show Remus the nice little dent the book had made.
"It's a shame I missed, then."
Sirius sent the book back.
Remus ducked and it ricocheted off of the wall. "Hey!"
Knock, knock, knock.
The three boys stared at the door.
"Sirius, you're closest," Remus pointed out after they all ceased to move.
"I'm recovering from a tragic incident where you almost took off my head. You get it."
"We wouldn't want that now, would we? Girls would be in mourning for years," Remus threw in sarcastically.
"Exactly. That many depressing people… isn't happy."
"You're a real man of words, Sirius," James said. He folded back the cover of his magazine and walked slowly to the door. He rubbed the back of his head as he opened it, and was shocked to see Lily and Alice standing outside his door. "Lily?!" he exclaimed in obvious shock. When he saw Alice, he added, "Frank's dorm is a floor up."
"I'm aware," she said with a mad twinkle in her eye. James laughed and allowed the girls to come in, though they were kind of reluctant. Not because it was James, Sirius, and Remus's room, but because boys were messy.
He shut the door behind them and they stood in the middle.
"Did you, erm, want something?" James asked. He tried not to stare at Lily, he really did, but he couldn't exactly help it. She was looking excited, but kind of awkward, and kind of disappointed if he was being honest.
"Actually, we came to return something," Lily answered in a much bolder voice than any of them were expecting. "He was thrown at us after surprising a bunch of little girls, but he didn't look happy about the situation. So we decided to cheer him up."
When James looked too confused Alice said, "Well, hold out your hands!"
James obeyed and was surprised when a brightly colored but familiar looking rat was placed in them.
"Is that…?" Sirius asked from across the room.
"How did you get him?" Remus asked as he ran over. "And what did you do to him?"
"Just a little wand work," Alice answered nonchalantly. "We really brightened him up, didn't we?" To which the boys responded with glances that showed barely contained laughter.
Ten minutes later, Lily and Alice finally left and Peter immediately transformed back into his normal self. The only thing that remained of their little make-over was the small hoop earring in his left ear, which he promptly tore out and tossed on the floor, onto the pile with everything he had been wearing.
"That was brutal," he said with a sigh, collapsing on his bed. "They trapped me with their Potion's books!"
After telling them the entire story of how, exactly, he landed in that situation, James couldn't help but ask, "Did Lily say anything about me?"
Peter looked thoughtful for a moment, considering his words with each blink in the direction of the ceiling. "I think she referred to you- on more than one occasion- as a snot-rag-troll-look-alike."
James sighed. Sirius chuckled and said, "Someone's got to teach her some new insults…"
James moped back over to his bed, where he collapsed on top of his quidditch magazine. That's when Peter knew he should lay off the jokes. James takes his quidditch magazines very seriously, and to crinkle one was to commit magazine murder.
"But then she contradicted herself," he went on to say. James looked up, delight in his eyes. "She said something about hoping to catch you in your boxers. But I might be mistaken."
Neither Remus, Sirius, nor Peter got any sleep that night as they were trying to help James come up with a plan in order to get Lily to casually catch him in just his quaffle boxers.
A/n: Hello? Hi! Yeah, I'm still alive, no worries. I HAVE however been ridiculously busy (school, proms, exams coming up, classes in general) and, apparently, haven't posted anything in over seventy days. Which I'm sorry about. I also got caught up in BEDA (if any of you follow Maureen Johnson, you should know what that is) which was really fun.
But yeah, I'm alive and kicking, just kind of tired and not exactly thrilled about this Lit test tomorrow. But what a better way to prepare than to write fanfics?
Sorry if I'm pretty rusty. It has been over two months. I promise to try and update more frequently!
Much love, a rat to decorate, and a James in boxers for you,
SK
(Fast PS: SunshineDaisies816- This one's for you for being such a crazy awesome motivator!)