This is an experiment. If you love it, thanks. If you hate it, it's all Dragonrider7's fault.
I don't own a single character in the DC Universe. Heck, I don't even own any characters in this universe!
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Chapter 1
Superman stepped off the transporter, baffled at the flashing alarm light. He stepped over to the wall comm. unit. "This is Clark. Do we have an alert?"
Bruce's voice responded. "We're having problems with the intruder alarm. It keeps tripping, but we haven't been able to detect anyone on the Watchtower but us. I think there's a short in the system, because the alarm is only registering an intruder for a second or two before resetting itself. Of course, Wally could be playing another one of his stupid pranks on us."
Clark sighed. The last time Wally had been in a prankish mood, they'd all found key components of their costumes swapped. Ordinarily it wouldn't have been a problem, but the Injustice League had chosen that very moment for a concentrated assault on the JL satellite, and they'd been forced to repel the attackers with what they had. Batman had used Wonder Woman's rope reasonably well, and Hawk Girl had managed to harness Green Lantern's ring to some effect, but John had nearly blown his fingers off trying to open a capsule on Bruce's utility belt. "Has anyone asked Wally?"
"No one has gotten a chance. He's racing around looking for his little black book. We thought he was tripping the alarm, but we've verified that the alerts aren't coinciding with his location at that instant." There was a brief pause. "If he's playing tricks on us, then this is all part of the game."
Clark nodded. "Okay, Bruce. Is the system diagnostic showing anything amiss?"
Bruce sounded annoyed. "I would have mentioned it if it was."
"Sorry, Bruce. Just covering all the bases. Is there anything else going on?"
"Surprisingly enough, no. Everything is peaceful down on the planet right now. No villain activity, no natural catastrophes – it's actually a lazy day for the Justice League. Except for the manic searching of one scarlet speedster."
Clark was about to head for his quarters when Wally zipped up to him. "Clark, do you know where my phone book is? I've got a date tonight and I need to look up her name, but I can't find my phone book."
Clark shrugged. "Sorry, Wally. Haven't-"
Wally was gone. "-seen it." Shaking his head, Clark stepped out into the main passageway and headed for his quarters. Halfway there he paused for a second. He thought he'd heard something vaguely familiar. He couldn't quite pin it down, but the sound made him uneasy. Shrugging it off, he continued down the corridor.
Raised voices in the conference room redirected his path, and he hurried there to see what had his fellow JL'ers in an uproar.
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"Give it back, Wally. This little stunt has gone too far. Remember what happened last time?" Bruce glared at Wally from across the table. "You're the only person on this station capable of borrowing it. You can't use it for your little date – the remote is encrypted to me alone."
Wally flushed an angry red. "I don't have your Batmobile remote. Like I'd take a date out in that monstrosity. Lousy thing would probably eject her! I want to know where my address book is! I leave it in the top drawer of my dresser, and it's not there." He looked around. "There's a prank going on, but I'm a victim too!"
J'onn entered the room, followed by Shayera and Diana. "I am also a victim. Someone has taken my digital diary. My family pictures – my only family pictures – are in that device. I am normally a patient being, but this violation of my personal property will not be tolerated. Whoever took it, please return it."
Diana nodded, obviously struggling to control her anger. "One of my vambraces is missing. I don't need it to function, but they were a gift. Losing one is unthinkable."
Shayera didn't have Diana's calm. She swung her mace around, pointing at each of the heroes as she punctuated her rant. "My helmet is missing. One of you has taken it, and I'll tear this station apart looking for it!"
John Stewart snapped his fingers. "See! Someone is going into all our quarters and taking things. My Marine Corps ring is missing! I thought I'd misplaced it, but after hearing all this, I know someone took it. Someone fast and lacking in common sense." His angry gaze settled on Wally.
"Oh, so I'm the only person who ever takes someone else's stuff, is that it? Wally the speedy thief! Everyone guard your wallet, the Flash is coming through!" Wally returned John's glare, then looked around and realized that John's glare was being mirrored by everyone else in the room. He sighed. "Okay, show me where this could be considered funny, and I'm a prime suspect. Until you can connect humor to the act, I'm innocent until proven guilty."
Tempers continued to flare as accusation and counteraccusation flew across the conference table. Finally J'onn put a halt to it. "It appears that each of us has suffered loss. And if this is a prank, then tempers have blown it far out of proportion. I recommend we withdraw to our quarters and calm ourselves." He looked at Wally. "Except for you, of course. Your monitor duty begins in three minutes."
"Aw, man!"
Without another word (but with many sour glances), the Justice League retired to their quarters. J'onn waited until the door slid shut behind him, then slumped a bit. The emotional turmoil on the station had been trying on him, and he needed a respite. He sat at his terminal, intent on some personal research he'd been putting off. Sliding open his drawer, his hand reached for the pack of Oreos he'd brought up from New York after their last mission.
His fingers bumped the bottom of the empty drawer.
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Three hours later, the Watchtower intercom rousted everyone from their private diversions. Wally shouted from the monitor room, "Hey, you might want to check this out!"
The other members of the League hurried into the monitor room and looked over Wally's shoulder. J'onn's voice rumbled, "You know better than to go on eBay while on duty."
Wally shrugged. "Yeah, but I didn't start there. On a whim, I Googled the various things that we've all noticed missing, and your Oreos are currently for sale. Auction ends in six hours. If you want them back, you'll need to beat $47.39 plus shipping and handling."
Clark stared at the screen. He paled, and his finger shook as it pointed to the screen. "It can't be . . ."
"What?"
They all looked. The seller was ambushbug1138.
Clark turned and bolted from the room. "I'll kill him. I swear I'll kill him!"
Only Wally was able to keep pace with Clark as he headed for the transporters.
To be continued . . .
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