Opening Note(s): I've wanted to try my hands on oneshot soo here it is! I'm not sure if I managed to pull out a decent plot though as I think I focused more on fluff. So prepare your mushy slash sexy music at the background...!— Or not.

This was supposedly a Valentine Fic but... oh well. Can I still offer a Valentine greeting? :D

Disclaimer: Let me tell you a cool trivia for you! Higuchi Tachibana created Gakuen Alice!

—Well okay, that's not really a trivia. I have a cooler one... Hitler created Disclaimer! X3 (ZOMG! It's internet holocaust! —Or maybe not.) :P

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Kissing Lesson
Written by: Snow Sparkle

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"You're a nut-head!"

Narumi's chin slightly slipped off his upturned palm at the incredible accent of each word but it seemed that his student didn't notice the flabbergast expression registered on his face. Slowly, Narumi simply put up a smile and grinned at his student placidly. "You think? Aww... and I thought I was a genius."

Natsume clenched his fists, his right eye visibly twitching. "Is this your idea of a joke Narumi?" Natsume grumbled, barely comprehensible as he uttered through his gritted teeth.

Narumi gave him a sly, malicious smile. One that was only common when Natsume was around and he was plotting something fishy. "That's Narumi-sensei, Natsume-kun. Thank you very much."

"And that's Natsume Hyuuga. Don't use endearments on me." Natsume retorted evenly, trying not to cringe at his teacher's smile. Heaven knew how he actually found Narumi creepy. Creepier than Persona even. Actually Persona's more on the vile side than on the creepy.

Narumi feigned hurt, dramatically clutching his chest. "You wound me, Natsume-kun! After all these years you still treat me indifferently!"

Natsume scoffed bluntly. "Somber up already. I don't have time for sentiments."

"Sure!" Narumi declared flippantly, promptly flapped open his black leather covered class book and ran his fingers though a certain page. "Hyuuga... Hyuuga... Hyuuga... Aha!" Narumi briefly looked up to his student to regard him. "You have twelve absences, lack five quizzes, four seatworks, one project— and wow, haven't passed a single assignment." He smiled and folded neatly his class book. He leaned over his palm, watching his student's unchanging expression. "Pretty impressive record."

"Thanks." Natsume said flatly, his eyes deadpanned.

Narumi chuckled. "So now you see the reason why I've summoned you here? Even though your test results are impressive, I'm afraid it can't cover other aspects such as group activities and recitation. You know the school policy. You can't go to the next year if you have a failing grade and the only way out is the one I've suggested."

"No way."

"Oh c'mon!" Narumi whined childishly, throwing his arms. "It's just about a kiss! You're acting like I'm asking you to claw your eyeballs out and feed it to the dogs."

Natsume paused, weighing and musing how far worse was one from the other then shrugged. "Same effect."

Narumi was torn between laughing and agonizing. It was hard to talk a student with a twisted sense of humor to do something he wanted. "Don't be so grim. Maybe it's a one tough job but I can make someone to help you."

"Forget it." he refused tightly and intolerantly marched his way out of the faculty room, waving an offhand goodbye.

"Aww... shucks..." Narumi wondered loud enough to prickle Natsume's ears. "And here I was thinking that that someone would be Mikan-chan..." Narumi deliberately stopped half-way, letting Natsume's imagination do all the 'dirty work'.

Bewildered and not believing and trusting his ears and Narumi, Natsume whipped his head back and his eyes were trained eagerly on his teacher. "Shoot."

Narumi resisted the urge to beam yet failed dramatically. "Oh now you're suddenly interested?" he wiggled his brows suggestively.

A low annoyed growl that escaped Natsume's throat was all it took for Narumi to confirm he had just made the boy eat on his palm. And Narumi wasted not the rare chance of playing the poor student of his. Only a fool would pass off this chance.

Sometimes, one has to wonder if Narumi was indeed on the side of the protagonists.

"Enticing, isn't it?"

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How to kiss— Natsume all but scratch furiously those three opening words and ruffled his hair in irritation. Damn that Narumi and all his crazy, sleazy little schemes. Better yet, damn himself for being the fool that he was.

Why did he accept this degrading job just because Narumi used Mikan as bait?

It was downright stupid of him to actually think and hope that him and Mikan would have some so-called Precious Moments together. Alone.

They haven't been talking for over a week now just because they had a fight over Mikan's first admirer, whatever-his-name-was.

The girl was so naïvely flattered and keyed up for having her very first admirer that came into light. Of course when he heard this, he scared her admirer away and told her off for being too trustful and naïve. She retaliated how it was so hard for her to find another guy who would like her and he hit back how she wouldn't ever find a guy like him.

I was the first one to notice her... if not Ruka.

She was stunned at first. It was a subtle confession that she didn't get it at all; she only got the part of how arrogantly he put it, like he was the best guy on earth. She seethed and practically stormed her way out from wherever they were.

So now, he took Narumi's bait and Natsume expected them to work together and to start sorting out things about the article and them. But when she came earlier that night, he was surprised to see her with a one-paged article she wrote on how to kiss. She told him that it was finished and all it needed was revising. That was all. And although she told him she'd be in his living room in case he needed anything, she was avoiding direct eye-contact or any contact.

He had already finished drafting his work— or rather Mikan's. Now all he had to do was revise, grammar and spell check the whole stupid thing to at least make it fit into his character to retain his reputation or he would suffer eternal damnation. His reputation had been bruised enough, thank you very much.

A slow, sly and malignant smirk marred his features as an idea popped into his mind. Narumi wanted an article on How to Kiss? Fine with him, only he'd do it his way.

Tips on how to get gob of germs into your equally germ-infested mouth:

He wrote, pleased.

Haven't you ever kissed someone?

He downright scorned.

Never had an experience but dying to have one?

Dying to have one but don't know how to do it?

You poor, pitiful little thing. Thank fuck you've found this.

Because you can now say adieu to your virgin lips as I shall now commence on doing you, a big favor.

Natsume absentmindedly chew over his pen and glanced down at the unedited portion of the article that Mikan dubbed as Seven Steps to Heaven. He sneered at her writing and how mushy it sounded. He felt an overwhelming desire to revise the whole thing although just thinking of it was tiresome. He looked down at the still unedited part of the article and openly scoffed at it. While the steps were not dramatically cheesy, they did lack a certain kick and edge that would make it ooze and fit his character.

He stayed frozen in his seat, inspiration lacking. The so-called Seven Steps to Heaven weren't tested before so it wasn't proven yet. He doubted Mikan would have the courage to test it herself. The steps were purely based on her fantasies and could hardly be incorporated with reality.

His eyes fixated at number one as he rubbed his chin thoughtfully.

1. Set a vivid prospect. The prospect must be someone who couldn't "nullify" your "burning passion" or else it'll be called an assault and end up staying behind prison bars.

Well he had to try and test the steps. It wasn't like he was so into this project but being unable to use a penname to hide his identity, his credibility was at stake.

Let a couple do it?

Nah. The best way to understand how it worked was to try it first hand.

But to whom should he test it...?

A relatively loud snore coming from his living room interrupted his thoughts. His right eye twitched both in annoyance and exasperation.

2. Groom up. Wear your best clothes and lucky underwear. Spray your favorite, aphrodisiac perfume. Don't forget to gnaw mints! (If you especially have halitosis, consult your dentist.)

It was especially hot that day and the air cooler was broken so he was only on his chinos, not bothering to put a top. He was knackered and bleary, the quintessence of Haggard-ness. Well at least he didn't forget to brush his teeth but he popped on some biscuits Mikan brought with her a while ago so nevermind.

Adding up with another exasperation was the other person in his den who had just interrupted his work.

He caught a glimpse of the timepiece set on the door leaving the study room and groaned at what it said: Eleven thirty.

3. Catch the prospect's attention. Do it in a nice, seductive way. Use "endearments" to enhance the mood.

A pain shot up in his temples. He needed rest.

Better yet, he needed someone to take it all out.

And it came in a form of Mikan on his couch, sleeping.

If this was a romantic scene, this was the time for him to admire her sleeping figure. The way she was smiling happily in her dreams, her lush lashes rested on her pale skin, her soft curly tresses that slightly veiled her angelic face and most specifically, the innocence and vulnerability that guys die for.

But this wasn't. At least not yet. And just by seeing Mikan snoring happily on his couch, had a negative effect. It insulted him a lot and envied her.

Here he was, working late at night, and here was his ostensible partner, head up in the clouds, with no worries in the world.

"Get up, you lazy toad!" he barked and kicked the couch where Mikan was sleeping.

Sure enough, Mikan jumped right on her feet but stumbled across the floor. She looked up at her attacker and balled her fist at him, rubbing her aching derrière. "Hey!" was her protest.

4. Strike a sweet and smooth conversation. A compliment or two is a good start. Be sincere but be careful in word-picking.

He scowled at her. "Don't Hey! me, you twit! What do you think you were doing?!"

She huffed indignantly, pulled herself up and tidied her clothes. "What do you think?" she snapped.

"Oh I don't know, playing dead?" he guessed sarcastically, eyes deadpanned.

"Guess again." Mikan threw back but then was overpowered by sleepiness and all but threw herself back at the couch. She rubbed her eye and yawned. "What is it that you want?" she sighed in resignation. "Are you finished?"

"No. All thanks to you."

She looked up to him incredulously. "Why do I always get blamed for everything?" she whined.

"You were snoring." he said tersely, explaining everything and daring her with his eyes to whine back at him.

"Oh." Mikan looked sheepish and apologetic. "Sorry..."

Everything was so frustrating. He had wanted things to be in-control and with he wasn't sure if he could think straight to be functional. Maybe it was a bad idea agreeing to get assistance from her. Natsume groaned, "Just go."

Mikan packed up her stuffs, all the while watching Natsume from the corner of her eye. She felt dejected and irritable but still anticipant for him to do something. Or say something.

Insensitive prick, she thought darkly. Couldn't he see that she wanted to make up with him but only waiting for him to do the first move? Hasn't she been always the forgiving type whatever others have done to her? So what was keeping him from apologizing?

There was only one sensible answer: Pride.

5. Start giving a hint. But it must be very subtle or you might scare the person away.

But then something hit Natsume and somehow Narumi's giggly voice managed to penetrate through his head and said: "I can make someone to help you."

"I was thinking that that someone would be Mikan-chan..."

He sneered at his thoughts. He couldn't believe Narumi was starting to get through his head.

"Well you needed someone to help you test it. Don't pretend as if you haven't thought of her before." his mind jeered, poisoning his mind. Eventually, he gave in to the idea. Whether it was because he was too exasperated to fight it or he actually liked it that he easily gave in.

She was so engrossed to whatever she was doing that when she walked to the door, she noticed Natsume blocking her exit.

She frowned at him but her brain exploded a very ecstatic Finally! She was so poor in hiding her expression that the slight positive curl of her lips didn't go unnoticed by Natsume. When she said, "I thought you wanted me to go," he inwardly scoffed at her poor acting skills.

He gave a nonchalant shrug, playing cool. "Actually, don't go. I need you to test this steps of yours."

"What do you mean?" she sounded offended, thinking he was doubting her ability to write. In a way he was, but it wasn't what he wanted to imply the most.

He moved smoothly and slyly to her and took a lean on the wall next to her. "I mean we better test this to ourselves just find out if this actually works."

It was hilarious how big her eyes got when he said it. She was stunned and frozen to her place that she didn't know what to say.

When he came a foot forward, his stance oozing with his aura, she flinched.

She felt herself backing up to a wall and she knew she was in deep trouble. She was trying to look anywhere but him. Get a grip! she told herself and instantly two imaginary Mikans popped in front of her. One in an angel's outfit and the other in devil's.

"You know you wanted it girl." the devil Mikan said. "Just give in. You've been waiting for this moment for like... forever!"

"No!" shrieked the angel Mikan. "You must remain pure and innocent. You two aren't even together! Save it for your wedding day!"

Mikan nodded favorably at the angel, her face showed determination. "You're right. What do I do?"

"Look into his eyes... Say—" the angel started to instruct and Mikan began to swallow thickly when their eyes met. There was something about his eyes, something about its being red that it looked so daunting and bold. And sexy. Just looking at him made her knees buckle and her resolve thrown to the straits. Even her angel-self wisely chose to close her mouth shut, unable to finish her instruction and not trusting herself, slowly giving in to the temptation.

6. What is left but to kiss? And nope, no detailed instructions for this part. USE YOUR IMAGINATION!

In an instant, she was hypnotized and when his calloused fingers swept her cheek, a shiver ran down through her spine. It was teasing her and at the same time, coaxing. Inevitably her eyes closed and the next thing she knew was his testing lips brushing gingerly against her.

It was a trial kiss, closed mouth at first.

When Mikan didn't make protests, calcified, his fingers from her neck crawled down to her nape, keeping her head on place as he planned to take control.

She jerked, feeling her toes curl and felt incredibly in raptures. The way his fingers travel made her shiver and almost loss in her wits. The way he nipped her lip and the way he dominated the whole thing.

Everything he did was torture yet pleasing and when she had thoughtlessly let her guard completely down, he deepened the kiss and it became something more divine. She felt like her energy has been sapped and her body zapped. Slowly and shyly, even hesitant at first she began to mimic whatever he was doing.

Mikan wasn't the only one lost in her world.

It was so intoxicating to them both. They contrastingly complimented each other.

Her sweet taste against his spicy masculine scent. It was driving them crazy.

He drove eagerly and she held onto his bare back for support.

Everything she thought, could stay like this. Then as if it was a race who was the first one to go back to earth, Natsume pulled away and the trance was suddenly broken.

It took moments for Mikan to register to her mind that it was all over. Then, realizing what she just did, her face began to flush deep red and felt scorching hot as she covered her face in embarrassment.

Natsume on the other hand, seemed arrogantly pleased he kissed her senseless.

"Ahahahaha..." she laughed nervously but then coughed afterwards, attempting to hide away her embarrassment as she got away from Natsume as possible. "Now you know it works." she squeaked and she mentally hit herself for sounding such a coward.

Natsume couldn't help but to give her a lopsided smile at the irony. The acclaimed Seven Steps to Heaven was so different from what had happened. He had to completely revise the whole thing.

Except for step number seven...

7. Repeat if you fancy— You know you do...

"Hey twit." he called out to her and grinned at her swaying, drunken-like walk. She didn't even try to compose herself.

She stopped, inwardly wincing, but managed to turn to him and waiting for him to continue.

"Let's do this again some time."

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Ending Note(s): Although we know it's been done several hundred times in other fandoms, I still want all of you to know that I am not the one who started this kind of fad. And just so, I haven't kissed anyone in my life yet (at least not on the lips) so sorry if it's kinda bland. It's not proofread but I'll edit this next time.

Do tell me what do you think. Please? :D