Okay, the summary didn't scare you away, so maybe this will: This fic is about Mary Sue. It's all about Mary Sue. The Teen Titans are just supporting actors at best. I will be making just about every Mary-Suish mistake in the book. This story's only saving grace is that it was written by a very good writer who died a little inside every time a Titan did anything OOC. But, for the sake of the Mary Sue, the fic must go on…

Disclaimer: I do not own the rights to any character except Mary Sue and Gary Stu, and possibly any unnamed characters—not that I want those, they weren't important. Characterizations and histories do not follow any particular continuity too closely and may be embellished beyond reason for the purposes of the story. DC gods, forgive me.

Center of the Universe

Hello. My name is Marigold Susan Klishay, but my friends all call me Rain because when I was little, I would prance around naked in the warm summer showers. Oh, and the author thinks 'Mary Sue' isn't an interesting enough name. I guess she's a hippie or something. Anyway, I am going to tell you a story of love, heartbreak, conflict and tragedy, but before that I must set the stage with a complete history, in all it's tragic glory, of the only character worth anything—me.

Now, most of you have the attention-span of an autistic squirrel, but even normal readers who can slog through a good twenty sentences of colorful and hardly relevant description will skip down to the eighth paragraph after this one because everyone knows what comes next is going to be boring and completely unnecessary, as I will be reminding you again of anything important once it actually becomes relevant. Then there are a select few who are so anal about reading everything, no matter how trivial, pointless or tedious a pursuit it is. I pity you. Do yourself a favor; call the ambulance before the blood starts flowing from your nose.

It was a beautiful summer afternoon at the Knightly-Dayton park. Martha Selina Hoogivsakrap was setting out a picnic lunch she'd packed for her and her sister Vicky. Vicky had already called to say she wouldn't be coming, leaving Martha all alone amid an impressive, two-person spread. Lonely and crestfallen, she didn't notice the approaching shadow until it was upon her. The joy in her heart when the handsome, young man asked to join her was matched only by his awe of her rare beauty, for this was love at first sight.

The two lovebirds talked and laughed the rest of the day away, just enjoying one another's company. Eventually her new beau, Thomas Wayne Klishay, heir to the powerful technologies company, K-Pax, ended their whirlwind romance with a marriage proposal.

After the wedding, a grand display of fragrant flowers, vibrant dresses, and even a flock of doves released with the kiss, Thomas and Martha/Mary thought they had found their happily-ever-after. Their love and happiness only seemed to grow with each new joy that found its way into their lives. Only one thing could complete this heavenly life, and two years after that fateful afternoon in Night and Day Park, she came.

Born on a Sunday, the Klishay's pride and joy grew up fast. A little slip of a girl, my bright smile and sunny disposition could light even the darkest of rooms. I grew up always being the prettiest, cutest, most lovable person in the room. My mom would spend hours brushing my silky, auburn hair and coifing it into the most perfect styles. And the clothes! I can't remember that far back, but the pictures remind me of how cute and loved I was. I was a brilliant child too. By kindergarten I was an accomplished painter, spoke three languages, and played both piano and violin quite well. It seemed as though we had everything—and we did…

…For a while.

I was five years old when my perfect family was destroyed by a freak martini olive accident. My parents, Thomas and Martha Klishay, were enjoying themselves at a high society cocktail party. The food was good, the music was upbeat and occasionally romantic, and all the unseemly drama was still in the bathroom. My father romantically fed my mother his martini olive after mom asked a question that perfectly set up a joke. He chose to deliver the punch line while she was still trying to chew, and in stifling a fit of laughter she inhaled the olive and tragically began choking on it. My mother was in a panic trying to cough the olive up, but my father tried to maintain his calm for the both of them. Another party-goer heroically stepped up to save my mother's life with the Heimlich maneuver, but her husband was standing right in front of her trying to reassure her, and when she coughed up the olive it flew straight into his mouth and he suffocated. Distraught, my mother flew from the sight of her beloved's fresh corpse, and in doing so, slipped on the floor, wet with the spilled drink. The paramedics got there in time to save her life, but the head trauma had sent her straight into a coma.

As I grew up alone in my family's mansion, cared for only by the estate's greedy guardian and the hired help, my situation grew progressively worse. Mr. Alden was a gambler, and his addiction led to a bitter divorce with his wife, and he took out his anger on me, beating me savagely in the basement after intense drinking binges. I tried to fight back, but only earned myself more bruises and broken bones. He also had a lot of debt, so between his embezzlement and my mother's hospital bills, the estate went bankrupt by my sixteenth birthday. Instead of a beautiful Sweet Sixteen party with all my friends and family that loved me, I spent the day watching vultures pick apart my life and family history for pennies on the dollar. The next day I was out on the street, homeless.

I felt very ashamed of my fall from grace, so I kept it hidden from my friends at school. I had to drop out and work two jobs to pay for an apartment, and every day was a struggle to keep going. The pain of everything I had lost was too much to bear, and suicide was never far from my thoughts…never far from my thoughts, until the day I met Robin…

My shift at the Beefy Burger had just finished, and I was just starting my new job as a teller at the First National Bank. I worked graveyard, so I finished just before the bank opened. We had only been open for a few hours, when Control Freak made his grand entrance, zapping every computer in the bank with his freaky remote control. Outside, ATM machines shot money out at patrons, causing nasty paper cuts and rioting. Inside, the tellers' machines rammed our stomachs with the cash drawers, then used their power cords to viciously lash us. The customers rushed for the exits, but unfortunately, Control Freak had zapped those too, and they chomped down on anyone foolish enough to temp fate.

"Ahahahahahahahaaaaaa! I have you all trapped! Now, where is the manager?" Control Freak grabbed one of the older tellers by the arm, silently demanding an answer.

Control Freak was impatient, and gave up on her quickly. Fiddling with his remote control, he pointed it at her, and she was suddenly high school age like me.

"Tell me where the manager is, or I'll set her clock to before she was ever born!" He followed his nefarious threat with an evil, yet geeky, bout of laughter that chilled me to the bone.

"Stop right there, Control Freak!"

All eyes turned toward the recently demolished front door.

"It's the Teen Titans!" somebody happily shouted.

Control Freak growled with frustration and threw his hostage to the ground. Then a malevolent smile spread across his acne-ed face, and he dramatically pressed a button on his remote.

Behind the Titans, outside, there was a series of crashes, followed by screams and frenzied citizens running away in a panic. All three drive-up ATMs and the two walk-up ATMs waddled over to crowd the only safe exit from the bank.

"Well, well, if it isn't the Teen Titans. I didn't expect you so soon, but that's okay. I've got plenty of friends to keep you busy!"

"Titans, go!" Robin commanded, and the young heroes sprang into action. Cyborg began the assault with a volley from his sonic cannon. The ATMs weren't very nimble, but still moved surprisingly fast, so the blast only caught one of them on a corner. Starfire's attacks hit next with a barrage of brilliant, emerald starbolts that beat two of the machines back a couple feet. Robin followed up her attacks with his bo staff, knocking them back even farther. Beast Boy and Raven tag-teamed the other machines, alternating between pummeling them with psychically levitated debris and various large, horned animal forms.

While the animated ATMs kept the Titans busy, Control Freak located the manager and brought him over to the vault.

"Open it!"

"I can't. It's on a timelock. I can't open it for another twenty minutes!" The manager was lying; I'd seen them open the vault half an hour earlier a few days before. Control Freak must have suspected this because he grabbed me and pointed his remote at my head.

"Open it now! Or we'll see what happens when I put her head in fast forward!"

The look of horror in my manager's eyes put me over the edge. I completely lost it. I was going to die, right then and there, and nothing could save me.

"What the—"

Sudden silence and a soft glow that grew exponentially into a brilliant aura were the only warning that preceded the powerful concussive blast that radiated out from me, driving Control Freak into one of the ATMs Robin was fighting behind him. The impact from Control Freak knocked the ATM over and sparks flew from the hole his head made in its back, rendering it practically useless for the rest of the fight. Several other ATMs had been damaged by the blast, but mostly everyone was just violently shoved toward the wall. Most of the Titans were fine, but Beast Boy had lost his gorilla form during the explosion and was knocked out cold. Down one ally and only one enemy, things didn't look so good for the Teen Titans. Robin, being the prudent leader that he is, did the only thing he could think of to win the fight. Striding over to me, he took my hand and stared into my awestruck eyes.

"Will you fight with us?"

It was the most magical moment of my entire life. Robin, the Boy Wonder, asking for my help! For just a second, time seemed to stand still. It was as if the world knew what we would have, and was waiting for us to grasp the enormity of it all before it continued on. (Hey, just thought I'd bug you by stating the obvious—Robin is HAWT!) I stared into those sparkling, azure eyes, wanting nothing more than to lose myself in them. I wanted to feel the strength of his bulging muscles wrapped around my waist as he gave me a soft, wet kiss. The mere thought of waking up next to this stallion of a man in silken sheets made me tingle. And this was my chance to be near him.

Lost in my reverie, the slowly resuming battle faded to a dull roar—the world surrounding us meant nothing. My focus was exclusively on the dashing man before me, and as I searched for the words to respond to him, my vision clouded and I fell into a swoon. Robin caught me, his sinewy arms flexing to support my weight. Amused, he smiled down at me and asked if I was alright. Still speechless, I weakly nodded my answer to both questions. Turning away, Robin returned to the fight with a renewed vigor. Not sure if he knew I'd agreed to join them, I wandered toward the fight, still slightly dazed. It wasn't until I was just outside an ATM's striking distance that it occurred to me I wasn't sure how to activate my powers.

Nothing.

I tried again, this time much harder.

Still nothing.

The ATM advanced ominously, preparing its attack.

Panicking, I searched wildly for the nearest superhero or hiding spot. I couldn't decide which to run to, Starfire or the overturned desk in the middle of the floor, and when I turned back, my adversary was mere inches from my face. Shrieking, my mind shut down and I got ready to die. Within five seconds, the familiar glow and accompanying silence returned. The light quickly invaded my sight through closed eyelids and when I opened them again, my opponent and everything else, have been scattered across the floor again. Silently celebrating, I took stock of the damage and realized that I was doing as much harm to our side as Control Freak was. Three out of the four remaining ATMs were barely functional now and the fourth was sparking and stilted. And of the four Titans that were left standing before, only Robin and Starfire appeared ready to continue. This revelation was disheartening, but an encouraging smile from Robin urged me on. Not sure what I could really do, I stood with the remnants of the Teen Titans against their foes.

The ATMs shambled noisily toward us. Looking over at Robin, I thought I saw his far hand twitch, but Starfire would've had a better view of it. A split-second later, the two of them charged the last of the enemy forces. Starfire's starbolts blazed brightly, and I got the feeling she might have been trying to show off for Robin. Robin, on the other hand, was thoroughly focused on the task at hand and rightly ignored her. (Boy, does that air-headed bimbo annoy the heck outta me. Doesn't she look like a whore in that mini-skirt? I wish they'd kill her off. Raven is way prettier anyway. Oh, and Blackfire is kind of cool; I wonder what happened to her? I'm not that into many of the other characters in this show, but I soooooo loved the Red X episodes, and the one with Nightwing. Maaaaan! I want that luscious piece of eye candy so baaaaad! Hold on…shoot! I'm supposed to be telling a story here! Dang it! Okay, back to the fic… X/)

I really wasn't sure what I could do to help at this point, so I decided that since Cyborg was down, I might as well see if I could activate any of his weapons. There was a lot of debris on him, but I managed to get a couple of panels on his arm open. I picked up a thick, sturdy wire and poked around in his arm a bit, hoping to accidentally fire something. And what do you know? It worked! A huge-assed beam of energy shot out of what used to be a hand, but now was just a barrel.

"Eep!"

I followed the direction of the beam and lo and behold, there was Starfire, bug-eyed and stricken, floating in front of a very dead ATM machine, her hair frizzed and cut a little short on one side. (There, take THAT!) It took a lot to not double over with laughter. Glancing over at Robin, I think I might have spotted a tiny smirk from him too.

The other ATMs went down easily after that, making the fight essentially over. Evidently, while the Titans occupied the ATMs inside, the animated cash registers had chased the tellers and patrons out the demolished front entrance where the first responders shot the renegade machines to pieces. The entire bank was a mess, but the people were safe and Control Freak was in cuffs. Well, a stretcher, anyway.

After Robin and Starfire finished wrapping up with Control Freak and the other living exit, Raven came to her senses enough to help Starfire triage their fallen friends. As Raven began levitating them, Robin ambled over to me. He patiently waited for the paramedic to clear me before speaking.

"You were pretty good."

I blushed a little. I did more damage than Control Freak! I told Robin he shouldn't be complimenting me.

"Nonsense. That was your first time, wasn't it? It wasn't your fault—you weren't in control."

"Yeah, I guess. I still feel bad about your friends."

"Well, if you want, you can apologize to them when they wake up."

Stunned, my mouth dropped open. Did I hear him right?

"Are…you alright?"

"Um…ah, yeah! Yes, of course. Sorry, um…should I give you my address so they can…"

He laughs.

"I'm inviting you to the Tower, silly! You showed a lot of courage back there, and considering the damage you did, I don't think it's a good idea to leave you untrained. What if it happens again?"

My face went red realizing that Robin considered me a danger, and even redder realizing that he was right. I'm a monster!

"Um—but like I said, it's not your fault!" He added quickly.

(All you suethors out there are gonna LUV this next part!)

[Excuse me, this is Rain. I would really appreciate it if you'd STOP INTERRUPTING MY STORY! Thank you.]

(Oh. Uh…Sorry Rain. Didn't realize you were…*ahem*… listening. Back to the fic.)

I summoned a small smile and agreed to accompany him to the Titan's Tower. We walked over to his motorcycle and he handed me his helmet. Donning the gift, I got on behind him and instantly fell into a daydream. I'd never been this close to a boy before, and considering what a fine hunk of man he was, I was practically overwhelmed with lust. I slid my hands around his waist, my palms resting flat against his well-defined abs. I laid my head against his spine and wished with all my heart that I didn't have this bulky helmet preventing me from brushing my cheek across his cape and taking in his masculine scent. I pressed my ample bosom into his back and soaked up the heat emanating from his flesh. Scooting closer in the seat, I pressed my thighs against his and reveled in the sheer closeness of the encounter. While we rode Robin's cycle across almost the entire city, my daydream went other places. If only I could…

If only…

—oOo—