Breaking Up

Summary: Boring, dumb, annoying, confused, jealous girls are something Sirius Black has to live with…or he could just dump them.

Basically a set of 100 word drabbles about Sirius Black's break ups with girls.

Disclaimer: Not mine.

"You're breaking up with me," she sobbed as she clung onto his robes tightly. "You-You can't do this to me."

He pulled her hands off his robes and placed them by her sides. "Well the fact is, you're too boring."

"W-What?" she questioned in-between her tears.

"You're boring," he repeated. "I mean I've only been dating you for six hours at least, and I'm already bored half to death."

"So were not dating anymore?" she asked in her high squeaky voice.

He patted her hand lightly. "I think it's best to pretend we were never dating in the first place."

---

She glared at him. "And why are you breaking up with me?"

"Well…"

"Oh, I get it now," she said slowly. "You're just jealous."

"Jealous?" he asked. "Jealous of what?"

"Jealous that we beat you in Quidditch," she told him with a smirk on her face. "Sirius Black can't handle having a girlfriend that beat him in Quidditch."

He shrugged. "Sure, believe what you want."

"Poor Sirius, you are really picky with your girls aren't you?"

He rolled his eyes. "Sure, whatever. Can I go now?"

She pinched his cheek. Hard. "Have fun being a sore loser Sirius."

He rubbed his cheek as she walked away. That pinch really hurt.

---

"So you're dumping me?" she said with a hint of disbelief in her voice.

"That's right," he told her firmly.

"You can't dump me," she told him, clearly disgusted.

"Why not?"

"Because." He motioned for her to continued with his hands. "Well because," she continued. "I'm me. I'm me, you can't dump me."

"And why not?" he asked again.

"You just don't dump me!"

"Well obviously I am."

She groaned. "This is not fair. I have never been dumped. Never!"

"There's a first time for everything," he told her sweetly.

She rolled her eyes. "Whatever. If anyone asks, I dumped you."

---

"I think of you more as a sister," Sirius said smiling brightly.

"You sleep with your sister?" she asked, confusion lacing her voice.

"Well...I don't have a sister. I have a brother, but not a sister."

"So you sleep with your brother, who's like a sister to you?"

"Ah, no. I defiantly don't sleep with my brother."

"So you're saying that I'm not good enough to sleep with anymore?"

"Exactly!" he exclaimed. "That's exactly what I'm saying."

She burst into tears. "You're absolutely horrible."

---

"Did you sleep with her?" she demanded, crossing her arms over her chest.

"Yes," Sirius replied with a smirk on his face. "How could I not?"

She raised her eyebrows and hit him across the head. "How could you do that?"

"Ah, easily," he replied smoothly, sending her a dashing smile.

He saw her knees buckle a bit. "I hate you."

He took a step forward. "You love me."

She nodded and lent closer to him. "Yeah, I love you."

He shook his head and pulled back. "Sorry, I don't do commitment."

She screamed and smacked him across the head. "I hate you Sirius Black!"

---

"So it's over then," she said sadly.

He grasped her shoulder. "I know. I love you, I love everything about you and I want us to remain this way, except for the whole girlfriend and boyfriend thing."

She rested her head on his shoulder and muttered something.

"Sorry, what was that?" he asked pulling away from her.

"Oh nothing. Just don't worry about it. I guess we were never meant to be."

He smiled at her. "I knew you'd be understanding."

"Right," she said as she walked away. "By the way, your robes on fire."

"What!" he yelled looking down at his robe.

She smiled sweetly. "Bye Sirius."

---

"What does breaking up mean?" she asked him.

"It means we won't be seeing each other anymore," he told her impatiently.

"We can still kiss right?"

As temping as that sounded he had to say, "No."

"So…we can't kiss."

"Yes."

"We can kiss?" her voice lifted even higher, if that was possible.

"No," he told her forcefully, taking a step back. "No kissing, no touching, no talking. Alright? We are not, I repeat not, allowed any contact."

"Does this mean I can go out with James now?"

Sirius smiled and shook his head. "Sure, go for you life."

---

"I'm sorry but we have to break up," he told her.

"Were we even together in the first place?" she questioned, crossing her arms over her chest.

"Ah," he said, bringing his hand around to rub the back of his neck. "I don't know."

"I don't think we were together, so unless I'm mistaken we don't need to break up."

"Will you go out with me then?"

She laughed. "Sure."

"Can I dump you now?"

She laughed again. "I consider myself dumped. Goodbye Sirius Black."

He watched as she walked away. That had to be one of his better break-ups.

---

"So you don't want me anymore?" she asked with a little sob in her voice.

"Ah…yeah." These girls always made him feel awkward.

"But we have something special," she told him.

"Sure we do."

"You don't believe me."

"Well we did last longer then any of the other 'relationships' I've shared, but it doesn't mean we had anything special."

"Yes it does," she persisted.

"No it doesn't."

"Yes it does."

"No it doesn't."

"Yes it does."

"This is why I have to break up with you!" he yelled throwing his hands up in the air. "You argue with me to much."

---

"I'm pregnant," she blurted out. "You can't leave me because I'm pregnant."

"What?" he practically yelled. Everybody in the corridor turned around the look at them. "What?" he repeated quietly.

"Well…you see…"

"This can't be happening…"

"I'm sorry Sirius."

"Wait, this can't be happening….It really can't. We never slept together. We've only been together for three days and barley seen each other so you can't be pregnant."

She stomped her foot angrily on the ground. "Well I could have been if you weren't with that other girl all the time."

He laughed. "Nice try, but we still have to break up."

---

"Its not you, it's me." He told her, trying to sound sad.

"Do you use that line on every girl that you try to break up with?" she retorted.

"Well I don't try, I usually succeed to break up with them."

She raised her eyebrows. "You've got to try better then that."

"What was so back with that line?"

"That line is overused and horrible, how about you use it you, not me. That's basically what you're telling a girl when you use that line."

"But that would have hurt you're feelings."

"Sorry Sirius, it's you not me."

"Fine by me, as long as I don't have to see your face again."

Smack.

---

"Don't you think one and a half weeks is long enough?" Sirius asked.

"Long enough for what?" she asked coyly.

"You know," he gestured. "Our relationship."

"Have we really be going out for that short time?"

"Oh but one and a half weeks is a long time…"

"No it isn't," she pointed out to him.

"Did I saw weeks? I meant months."

"We haven't been going out for that long," she said slowly.

"Yes we have," he replied quickly. "Sorry we have to break up."

As he ran down the corridor her turned back to look at her. "Bye."

---

"I think you love me more then I love you."

"Obviously you don't love me at all then," she stated.

"And why would that be?"

"Because I don't love you a single bit."

"So it's a mutual decision then," he said brightly. "To break up I mean."

"Sure, whatever. Dating you is killing who I am anyway."

He blinked at her. "Well sorry if I like a girl who's exactly like you used to be. That was until you became a bitch."

She shook her head. "You really need to work on your break up lines Black."

"I know."

---

"I know it took me two months to get you out on this date but know I'm feeling…" He trailed off.

"Feeling what?" she asked anxiously.

"A little tied down."

"We've only been going out for a night."

"And what a night it was," he said happily. "But I'm just not in this for the commitment."

"You're never in anything for the commitment."

He sighed. "We're just not happy together, you have to admit that."

"Not happy together?" she cried. "I'm perfectly happy."

"Well I'm not."

---

"I think we have to much in common, we're too alike."

"You're dumping me?"

"To put it simply, yes."

"But why?"

"I told you before, we have too much in common."

"That's just an excuse and a stupid line people use when they want to dump other people."

"I think I know that."

Sirius Black watched as she walked away. He just got dumped by a good looking girl. What was the world coming to?

---

I don't know what made me write this, let alone post it.

Hope you enjoyed it.

Please leave a review…