I do not own Twilight. I only wish that I could hold Edward hostage but Stephenie Meyer won't let me ;) In the meantime I'm more than happy to borrow Ms. Meyer's characters for a bit of "fun". This story is written with the utmost respect for her work.

A/N - Yes, this is my first fanfic, my first lemon, my first time being brave enough to publish any writing of mine online. The best thing you can do is to please be honest and constructive!

Chapter One - Arrival and Arousal

Bella and I were approaching Isle Esme, my family's secret hideaway just outside of Rio de Janeiro, and I was battling with the mixed emotions of excitement, joy, and terror. How was it even possible for all these things to exist in my mind at once? Of course, I knew the answer to that question; I was a century-old vampire and could consider many, many things at once in my vast brain. Thinking about what Bella and I were about to do, though, was becoming increasingly difficult. Our boat got closer and closer to the soft lights of our island home and there was no more escaping this reality. This was our wedding night, or perhaps the night after our wedding night (it had been a long trip from Forks, Washington to Brazil). The reality that was hitting me so hard was that Bella and I would consummate our marriage tonight.

Two very different sides of my ego were fighting with themselves as I gripped the steering wheel harder and led our boat to the island destination. The part of my mind that really was a seventeen-year-old lusted for my perfect and innocently seductive Bella. I had never been able to express quite how much I lusted for this beautiful woman who I could now call mine. To do so would have given over in part to the other part of my ego; the blood-thirsty vampire who tried to convince me to throw caution to the wind and put my dear Bella in real danger. As much as I lusted to be with Bella tonight in every way physically possible, I terrified of letting go too much and having the blood-thirst take over. Either way, I had promised Bella that I would at least try to be together sexually once we were married. I had only broken a promise to Bella once and I wasn't about to do that again.

I could have sworn that I felt the butterflies in my long-vacant stomach picking up speed as we approached the island's dock. I knew that intimacy with my all-too-fragile human wife (my wife!) would be difficult. I had tried to plan out ways to be gentle with her in my mind, tried to anticipate how I would keep my focus on her safety while I gave myself over to my sexual desires. Not being able to sleep meant I had every night over the past few months to ponder all the reasons why we should not be doing this. That part of our first night as husband and wife I had played out in my mind a thousand times. What was hitting me now was a lot more profound.

Like any other young, sexually-inexperienced man about to seduce the woman he loved for the first time, I had NO IDEA what I was doing.

Despite the hundred-and-seven years of insight that I had, the countless times I had seen sexual intimacy played out in the minds of others, the volumes I had read about human sexuality… I was as inexperienced as you could be with this type of intimacy. When it came down to it, I was just virgin with no clue how to be seductive and live up to Bella's expectations. I had insisted on marriage before having my beloved join me in the world of the eternal with my family. She had insisted upon this before she became a vampire, too. I could by the racing of her heart that she was just as nervous as I was, but I also knew that her expectations were high – that sex with me was worth risking her life for.

Before I knew it I was sweeping Bella up in my arms and carrying her up to the front door of my mother's home on the island. The forest was animated with tropical creatures that I could barely hear over the thundering pulse of Bella's racing heart. Her breathing came in eager gasps a I rested her gently on the ground of the massive master bedroom suite. I steadied her by placing my hand very gently on the small of her back. My God, she was so nervous I barely believed she could stand up on her own! But, after a few tenuous sways she finally corrected herself and seemed steady enough for me to leave her for a few seconds.

"I'll go get… the luggage" I whispered shakily in her ear moments before I sped back to the front door. Was that really my voice? Edward – get a grip of yourself!

Back in the bedroom I noticed beads of sweat on the back of Bella's sensuous neck. She was wringing her hands and looking anxiously at the majestic bed in the centre of the room. "It's a little hot in here," I explained nervously to my beautiful wife. "I thought…" what was I thinking? Could I really do this? "… that would be best."

"Thorough…" she somehow managed to choke out. I was relieved that she was as sexually inexperienced as I was. An involuntary chuckle escaped my lips. I took her left hand lightly in mine, drawing circles on the inside of her wrist as I explained "I tried to think of everything that would make this… easier…" even though I still had no clue how to seduce this beautiful woman. Bella swallowed hard in answer.

Her nervousness was certainly not making this easier and I had to change that… quickly. Seeing her this anxious made me yearn to give Bella whatever she wanted and I had to carefully control those emotions tonight. I could not let myself lose control at any point tonight. To do so would put Bella in incredible danger. Much greater danger than I'd put her in over our years together. Besides that my own anxiety was making it hard to speak. '

My mind instantly grasped an idea that would calm us both down. I started hesitantly, "I was wondering if… first… maybe you'd like a midnight swim with me? The water will be very warm. This is the kind of beach you approve of." The thought of Bella's pale skin in the warm water made me work harder to calm the monster within. I had to do this! Now that the thought had entered my mind I had to feel my wife's soft, sensuous skin in the warm water. My muscles tightened slightly as a scene started to play out in my mind. I had always tried to tune my brothers and sisters memories of skinny-dipping here out of head, but that was a difficult thing to do when you involuntarily heard other's thoughts. God, I wish I knew what Bella was thinking right now!

"Sounds nice" she choked out again. This will not work, I thought, unless we both calm down. As much as I didn't want to leave her, I knew we both needed a moment to calm our anxieties.

"I'm sure you'd like a human minute or two…" I suggested. We had been traveling almost twenty-four hours straight. She was still not breathing evenly. "It was a long journey," I added. Her wide eyes took in the plush white bed in the centre of the room, panic shaking her every breath. I leaned down and let my breath brush across her neck in a move I knew would excite her. Bella's heart rate did not disappoint as it picked up a pace. "Don't take too long, Mrs. Cullen," I whispered in her ear as a grin spread across my face. She jumped at her new name, making me excited as ever. "I'll wait for you in the water" I added as I paced out the doors directly onto the beach.

I yearned to glance back at her, curious as to her reaction. Had I eased some of her nervousness? Better yet, had I aroused her? I had no idea but it was driving me mad! I needed to calm down and knew a few laps around the island would help with that. I slipped the last of my clothes off and threw them over the low-hanging branch of a nearby palm before I slid into the water. As I swam towards the other end of the island I could hear the faint sound of her heart picking up speed but this time her breath wasn't gasping. It was different somehow. I'd heard that panting before – my heightened sense of hearing made it difficult to escape some sounds in a house full of horny vampires. This breathing was different; she was panting. She was aroused!

As much as I hated being away from my love for even a moment, being out of earshot of Bella's heart and frantic panting started to calm my nerves. I needed to steady myself! I needed to clear my head and become resolved as to what I was about to do. Bella was eager as ever to throw caution to the wind and ignore the serious risk that came with our sexual intimacy. Was the teenage part of my mind thrilled that she was just as aroused as I was right now? Ceratinly! More than I could ever imagine I would be thrilled. But I had to sober my thoughts and make sure I kept her safe.

As I swam a glint of gold caught the corner of my eye as my hand crested the surface of the water. The gold band that now rested upon my left hand brought a proud tightening in my chest. I could still hardly believe that Bella was mine! The ring on my finger now represented more than the unyielding love I felt from every pore of my body; it also symbolized a iron-clad bond I had just forged with my dear Bella. I had never imagined that a piece of jewelry such as this fragile ring could be so symbolic of our love…

So that's what this was. Tonight was about one last union; our love and our bodies. As much as the danger still existed, I was resolved that tonight would happen and Bella would remain safely mine.

I approached the near side of the island and could hear Bella turning off the shower inside. She would be coming out to meet me very soon. My mind was now clear with two very evident truths about tonight -

One – this lust that I felt for Bella was unlike anything I had felt previous in all our months together. At this moment my long-buried hormones ached for her not so differently from how the monster inside me ached for her blood on that first meeting. The yearning I felt now was also on the verge of physical pain. Bella hadn't exactly helped with countless sexual advances over the past weeks. By god, she is a seductress! And – she's all mine! The anticipation of seeing her perfect figure slip into the water, feeling every part of her bare skin against mine, and having the power (I hoped) to make her moan was driving the adolescent part of my mind mad!; and

Two – Being a vampire I knew that I had ample room in my mind to ponder and focus on many emotions at once. I didn't want to stop considering the lust that I felt but I had to ensure that my rational mind was never allowed to overtake my emotional mind tonight. I had resisted the lure of her blood this long; I knew I had the power within me to resist it tonight. The only way I could figure this would be possible is if we took things very slow tonight, and if I took charge of that pace.

One final thought crossed my mind as I heard Bella's terrycloth towel hit the sand of the beach. I wonder how my wife would react to this long, slow night of lovemaking.

Like what you're reading? Leave me some feedback please! I need some tips on how to make this chapter better, and motivation to keep working on chapter 2!

-EdwardIsMyMuse