BPOV
As I went inside of my old house I noticed Jacob holding Leah lovingly and whispering in her ear. We had been in Florida for a week, and I already felt better. I missed this place terribly, and was finally starting to come out from my unwanted darkness.
"Bella" Jacob called, walking with Leah towards me. "Can you lend me your laptop?"
"Yeah, come on, it's in my room."
We walked together chatting lightly about New York and how different it was from here. As I opened my bedroom door my jaw dropped, I didn't even register the closing of a door behind me. My room was completely empty; there was no furniture, nothing.
"Jacob what happened?" I asked turning around but pulling up short.
"Jacob's not here for you to hide behind anymore, Bella." It was Edward. His body was blocking the door, which was closed.
"Get out" I said, my voice breaking, pain filling me as soon as I saw him. He didn't move, and I pushed him out of the way trying to get to the door. However, the door wouldn't open.
"Jacob open the door!" I said, surprisingly my voice was strong even though my eyes were filling with tears.
"I won't open till you talk to him Bella." said Jacob. I was surprised; I thought he had been on my side.
"Fine" I muttered bitterly. Then louder "Then get ready to never let me out because I will never talk to you. So you might as well give up."
"I'll never give up; I'll never let you leave again." He said quietly, almost as if to himself. I walked towards one corner of the room, sitting on the floor as far as I could from him. I was exhausted, it was late and I had just gotten back from visiting my step father Phil, who owned some clubs and could only see me there. I put my knees to my chest, holding myself in a tight ball. I closed my eyes and willed the tears that he brought away.
The next thing I remembered was a white light coming in through my now bare windows. I was surprisingly comfortable, and was actually relishing in a dream where Edward had come back for me. I always wished he had come to get me, although I would never admit it to anyone or myself. When I opened my eyes I internally cursed. Staring at me were the most beautiful green eyes in the world. The reason I was so comfortable was because I was sleeping in Edwards arms, my back against his chest, my head on his shoulders, he had his arms around me, wrapping me in a secure blanket of warmth.
"Hi" he said
I tried to push myself off of him, but his iron grip refused to budge and I was pressed tighter against his chest.
"Bella we need to talk" he said looking at me pleadingly.
"No, now let me go" I was surprised at how cold my voice sounded and was secretly pleased I didn't clue him into my internal struggle.
"I'm not going to let you go until you talk to me." He held me even closer almost as if to prove his point and no matter how hard I struggled he never let me go. After about half an hour, my tears had retaken me in defeat and I stopped trying to break through. He just stared at me, not once breaking a sweat. That was how I noticed how sad and troubled he looked. He had shadows under his eyes and his hair had grown out, making his face look older and more manly. His eyes held an internal pain, and it seemed like he was going through torture. I immediately felt a surge of pity, but stopped it in its tracks before it overpowered my sensible thinking. He looked at me straight in the eyes and I had trouble looking away. It was just like that first day, except this time there was a past that told me to be careful and never again give away my heart.
I looked down embarrassed when my stomach growled. I had slept through the night without eating anything after lunch.
"Are you hungry?"
"If I say yes can I get out of here?"
"No, we have food" he pointed towards a tray by the door. It had several breakfast items as well as coffee and different types of milkshakes. I was so hungry, my stomach growled again, and I felt my heart clench when he let me go. It was what I wanted, and I had to remind myself that he had betrayed me, that he was no longer the person that I knew, that maybe he never was. I walked over to the tray and plopped down to eat right there. Edward followed me, and sat right across from me as we both ate. When I was done I got up and walked into the bathroom, shutting the door and locking it behind me, I hadn't finished washing my face when I heard a knock and someone trying to open the door.
"Bella open the door" said Edward calmly.
"No" I said my voice firm with false strength.
He knocked harder.
"Open the door" he said, and I knew he was trying very hard to keep calm.
"No, Go away Edward"
"Damn it Bella. OPEN THE DOOR!" his temper had finally blown and he was banging the door while he screamed at me from the other side
"I'll open as soon as you leave." I told him, almost afraid of this version of Edward.
"I'll never leave!" he yelled again
"Then I'll never open!" I yelled back.
"FINE!" he yelled, and I heard him walking away from the door. I sat on the closed toilet seat, my head in my hands. I felt a slam outside the door, followed by Edward screaming for Jacob. After about five minutes I heard my door slam again.
"Are you going to open the door?" asked a very angry yet calm voiced Edward.
"No" I said, it was almost a whisper, I was truly afraid. I had never had him scream at me before, and though I couldn't see him I was pretty sure his eyes would me mad and half-crazed.
"Well then you better step back, because I'm breaking the door down"
"WHAT? Edward are you crazy?" I screamed stepping back as far as I could, leaning against the shower doors. He started banging against the door.
"Edward Stop!"
"Unlock the door!"
"NO"
The banging continued; until my door was practically in shreds it slammed open against the wall to show me a angered Edward standing with something that looked like a pickaxe. One of his hands was bloodied and probably swollen from all the knocking.
"Are you going to talk to me now?" he asked through clenched teeth. He looked truly frightening.
"No, please just leave me alone." I whispered
He walked towards me, and caged me in against the shower doors. I couldn't step back, or forward, I was trapped. I gulped.
"You might not want to talk to me but you're damn sure going to listen" He was staring at me, his angry eyes closer than they had been in months; he was practically speaking against my lips. A centimeter apart, and I could feel the electricity generate from him.
"I'm not-"he silenced me by pressing his lips to mine. I felt the familiar jolt of warmth and passion and hated myself for enjoying this. His body was pressed against mine, it was impossible for me to move, even though at that moment I didn't want to.
"You are going to listen to me whether you like it or not." He whispered in my ear making me shudder.
"Listen to me" I said softly, I couldn't let him do this, I couldn't let him break me even more.
"Fine, but you will let me talk when you're done" he said
"Ok" I told him everything foolishly, without editing and poured out my heart.
"I can't do this. You can't just come back here. It'll just take me that much longer to forget you when you get bored again." He tried to interrupt him but I pleaded to let me finish. "It was torture when I saw you with her, so much time I've spent in darkness, in pain. It hurts too much to love you. I can't do it. You were my everything, and my heart got broken, and even if I never love anyone again, it'll be because I'll always love you, but I can never be with you. You have to understand I had never given myself over to someone so completely, and you crushed me." I was sobbing, and Edward looked near tears as well. "I'll always wonder if it was ever true, and I hate you. I hate you for making me love you, for not letting me forget; I hate everything you do because it reminds me of when you were mine. So please, just leave and let me live, I can't take anymore of this pain."I was sobbing into his shirt by the time I was finished. He had small and silent tears flowing down his face.
"Bella, I didn't cheat on you." His voice was honest and firm, but I couldn't let myself hope. I was changing, I was putting my pajamas on, I went to the closet to grab a t-shirt and she just jumped on me. I didn't even know she was there. She pinned me to the bed, and I was pushing her off when I saw you by the door. I followed you but I was too late. I wanted to talk to you, I wanted to go with Jacob when you called him, but he wouldn't let me. He didn't know the truth. I called you every day. It's been hell without you. I've missed you so much, not just Bella the girl that I loved, but Bella my best friend. The entire family is depressed. My personal hell is a world where you don't exist. I can't go on living without you." His voice cracked, and the tears fell freely down his beautiful face as he said the only words that could change me. His eyes showed a burning man, a man in so much pain that I had yet to live through such a thing, my suffering fell short of the burning man that was in Edwards eyes. Of course I believed him, it hurt me so much to see how stupid I had been, how much time we had lost. I felt my masked tears resurface.
"I'm, Ed-" I was short of words, I was trying to tell him I had forgiven him, I was going to beg him to forgive me. But he cut me short.
"Damn it Bella" he said, pressing me harder against the shower doors.
"You cant tell me you don't feel anything anymore. I know you. I feel you under me, your heart racing, how you blush, just like that…" he said pointing at my cheeks "…whenever I'm around. I know that when I kiss you, you feel it too. You feel the electricity, the jolt, I KNOW YOU DO!" and then he kissed me. If I ever thought Edward had kissed me before I was mistaken. His lips crushed me and demanded my participation. He was exuding passion and love and an unanticipated hunger that made my blood boil and shocked me to my core. He put one hand in my hair, holding my face to his, the other on my back. As I put my legs around his waist he leaned into me harder, and kept his other hand from letting me fall. I kissed him back as well as I could, showing him my love, my forgiveness, my trust in him. When we separated we were breathless, as Edward moaned my name.
"Edward I-"I started again, only to be interrupted.
"No, Bella, nothing you say can canc-"
"Edward SHUT UP!" I yelled, irritated at him.
"I love you, I'm sorry. I was so stupid" I begged him, he looked shocked.
I saw his expression change, to confusion, then the most beautiful smile of joy.
"Bella, I love you so much, I missed you like crazy, I-" I interrupted his rant.
"I know"
He gave me a breathtaking smile and kissed me again, this time much sweeter, slower, yet building.
"Can we get out of here now?" I asked him, breathlessly.
"Yeah, come on"
I smelled something delicious coming from the kitchen, there I found Alice in a bright pink bikini, dripping water on the floor and setting the table. Emmett was shirtless, also drenched and wearing an apron that said 'kiss the cook". Rosalie was perched on the counter talking to Angela and Leah, while Seth, Jazz, and Jacob were walking in, drying themselves off with the biggest towels I had ever seen. I smiled as I looked around at my family.