Sorry for the long, long wait for this to be written. My exams are coming up so I've been very busy with my DA account, revision and still keeping my social life intact. So sorry for not continuing the story. I've been thinking of ways to finish this and this way seems good, so please sit back, relax and enjoy!!! One more chapter or so. The song I recommend for the next few chapters is called "Almost Lover" by A Fine Frenzy.

Edward's POV

I couldn't tell Al and Roy what the Doctor had just told me…I went for a check-up, seeing as though it'd been a while since he'd come down to give me a check over. It had been nearly a month since Roy and I had gotten together, in fact tomorrow would be our one month anniversary. Al was so supportive of everything, more than I could've possibly imagined. And I would soon be allowed to work again and continue the search on finding a way to get our bodies back…well…until I'd went to the doctor's that is.

Dr Hendric's face was grim as he steadily eased himself down onto his seat after listening to my chest, running the usual check up routine. He leaned his elbows on the desk, eyes closed behind black framed glasses.

I felt a terrible jolt in my gut, and my heart started to pulse like mad. I felt like saying that he needn't waste his breath telling me what was wrong, but I couldn't. A part of me wanted to know what he had to say, to hear what was going on with my body. I couldn't let myself die without getting Al back to normal…it wouldn't be fair on him. I better just hear whatever I have to do to get better or prolong my life to give me some time to fix things.

Dr Hendric's eyes opened and he heaved a deep sigh before daring to speak, as if he needed the extra oxygen just to speak these words.

"I'm afraid your condition has only worsened, Mr Elric," Dr Hendric spoke slowly, as if he wanted every word to sink in and digest. "Your lungs are starting to collapse, which is applying extra pressure on your heart. It basically means if you strain yourself…you could have a heart attack and you will unlikely recover…"

The words were like acid, my body trying to digest them but my body knew it was bad, it didn't want it to be there and it wanted to be rid of it like some foul odour. I wanted to walk away from it…but no amount of fresh air could get rid of this.

"So I'm dying…is that what…you're saying?" my voice sounded strange even to my own ears, strangled and choking against tears that my eyes didn't even bother repressing.

Dr Hendric pressed his lips together and closed his eyes as if to give me the answer. I looked down, my fists subconsciously clenching until my knuckles were chalky white. After all those years searching for a way to get Al back to normal…to make atonement…was all a waste? We'd hardly gotten anywhere…our bodies remained the same and our sins still intact. And what about Roy? We'd only just got together…only just realised our feelings…and now those feelings are awakened, they'd only be put to sleep?

"I am sorry…" Dr Hendric said, his voice sounding hoarse. "We will give you some kinds of medication to ease the pain…but it is unlikely you'll live through the year…I'm so sorry." This sounded like the first time he'd ever had to tell someone they were dying, he seemed to be taking this harder than I was as he scraped back his chair to get some medicine.

The medicine didn't even mean anything to me. I wouldn't bother taking them…but I knew deep down I had to. I had to ease the pain a little so I could try to find a way for Al's body to be normal again. I swore to myself in my head I'd do anything to find a way, a way to do it quickly just so I could give him something before I died. I had to do it…I just had to.

* * * *

As I said, there was no way I could tell Roy or Alphonse. I wouldn't…I refused to. I cried for hours when I went home, seeing no one was there so I was completely alone. I lay face down on Roy and my bed, my shoulders heaving with sobs. My chest started to ache but I couldn't care less. My heart was being pelted by jagged stones, stones that sent mixed emotions. They struck different areas of my heart, the area that only wanted to get Al back to normal, the area that didn't care about myself and the area that longed to be with Roy forever and not leave him behind.

I was the only family Al had…how could I leave him…? I'm so sorry, Alphonse…

I didn't realise how long I'd been crying, since I heard the front door click and hear the familiar clinks of Al's armour limbs and the familiar yawn that escaped Roy's soft lips. I rubbed my eyes with the back of my fists, looking in the mirror to see my hair was disarray and my eyes were red and my cheeks blotchy with tears. I swallowed the lump in my throat and took a deep breath to steady my throbbing heart.

"Edward!!! We're home!" Roy called into the house.

I slowly went to the top of the stairs, forcing a plastic smile as I held the banister for support. Roy looked up at me, as did my brother. That image nearly made me cry again, seeing my lover and brother standing side by side, looking up at me, almost showing how far away we'd soon be, them both living with me in the distance…

"Edward, sweetie?" Roy looked concerned, breaking through my gut wrenching thoughts. "You look pale…are you feeling sick?"

A part of me wanted him to confide in, to throw myself into his arms and sob, and to share the agony that tore through me. But I refused, pushing back the temptation. I'd have to face this alone…I just have to find a way to get Al back to normal and then I'd tell them…

I forced a smile, walking slowly down the stairs. My feet felt like lead as I came to a halt on the second to last step, looking into Roy's eyes. He looked uncertain, his hands rising slightly as if to catch me in case I fainted.

"I just had a little headache," I brushed away his anxious inquiries. "But I'm okay…now that the two most important people to me are home…"

I fell into his embrace, my arms snaking around his neck, our lips connecting as my feet touched the ground, organic leg landed with a thud and automail leg landing with a small clink. Roy closed his eyes, his arms locking around my waist to pull me closer, hips touching. I giggled against his lips only to pull away to look to Al. I never felt such an urge to hug my brother…I walked to him and stretched my arms out like a small child. Al laughed weakly, as if to conceal his own concern as he held me.

"What's got into you today, Brother?" Al asked gently, letting me go.

"What do you mean?" I felt the heat flood to my cheeks, feeling a clammy sensation breaking out across my forehead. "I'm fine, Al. I'm just so happy to see you two…" Roy came up behind me, his chest against my back, hand on my shoulder. My hand reached up to hold his hand there on my shoulder, tilting my head back to look up at him.

"Our one month anniversary is tomorrow, Squirt, if you haven't forgotten," Roy spoke softly, his free hand brushing my bangs from my eyes, his touch feeling traces of burning sensations across my skin.

I pouted. "I'm not a squirt," I protested playfully. "I'm getting taller you know! I'm probably around…five foot now…" I realised how small this was compared to Roy, considering he was around six foot tall. And Al was taller than Roy…jeez, I really am a squirt.

"Well, I'll get started on the dinner," Roy broke the silence, pressing his lips tenderly onto my forehead before breaking our embrace, heading into the kitchen. "Ed, try to relax a little. Don't wear yourself out. Al, if he doesn't do as he's told, pick him up and stick him up on a high place until he obeys. Maybe…a foot stool will be tall enough."

I growled, the sensation tickling my throat. I fought the urge to cough and retreated to the bathroom to cough into my hand, hoping to muffle the roughness. I hated it when I had my coughing fits. Air was so rough against my throat and didn't seem to want to refresh my starving lungs. My lungs seemed to clench tightly like someone was squeezing them, my eyes flooding.

I didn't hear anything after that. One minute I was standing and then my knees seemed to sink beneath my suddenly heavy weight. Liquid was rising from my chest and I spluttered as a splatter of blood stained my white gloves.

SHIT!!! I thought as I desperately tried to regain the strength to get back onto my feet. If Roy or Alphonse find me like this…I'll have no choice but to tell them what's going on. And I can't do that…not before finding a way…to get Al's body back…

And with that, I heaved myself to my feet, clenching my fists as I steadied my breathing. I quickly swilled out my mouth to rid of the iron bitter taste that took over my mouth and smell. I spat it out in the sink, the transparent liquid mixing with the crimson, turning into a pale colour.

I brushed my bangs from my eyes, feeling my head was boiling hot. Things were definitely getting worse…I guess Dr Hendric was right…I didn't have long left…