A year went by. Rukia turned eighteen in January. Ichigo gave her a locket. That he said had belonged to his mother; she figured he'd stolen it before his father and sisters moved away. But she still appreciated the battered round gold pendant; inside it had an old picture of him as a toddler. None existed of him as a teenager but she still wore it inside her blouse, close to her heart.

She would be attending Karakura University, refusing her father's offer to pay for an out of town one or if she wanted…possibly Cambridge in England. Her look of horror said it all and the matter was dropped. In Karakura she would stay. With him, though nobody else knew about him except Renji…or so she assumed.

The morning of July eighth, the sky was stormy and rain threatened as Rukia got up. Ichigo wasn't there to greet her, he always was…so why not now? Puzzled, she climbed the pull down ladder of the attic, her hair messy from the bed, her thin summer gown clinging to her body as she stepped into the frigid regions of the sloped room. He was there. Standing at the small window, looking out into the rain gloomily.

"Hey you," she teased, moving across the creaking boards to him. Though they couldn't exactly touch per se, she leaned in by him and tilted her head up, fluttering her lashes coquettishly, "happy birthday." Dark amber eyes met hers and then dropped suddenly to the floor as if he were ashamed.

"What's wrong, Ichigo?" her voice sounded strange even to her own ears. He didn't answer, not for a long time and then he said, "there's something I need to tell you. Go down to your room and I'll meet you there." His look was so peculiar that she hesitated to obey. One last look back as she went down slowly, wrenched her heart painfully. He wasn't looking at her; he was looking down at his own hands, immaterial but even more so and constantly fading in and out.

~~~*~~~

She sat on the bed, silently telling herself that what she saw could not be. He was a ghost…so maybe it was just his strength was sapped. Maybe he needed energy…

"I've been remembering things."

She looked up startled; he'd materialized through the ceiling and stood by the bed, looking down at her. "What kinds of things?" she felt herself ask. Though, she thought she knew. "Things about my death." He said simply. Her hands balled up in her lap, "tell me then. What do you remember?"

Ichigo blinked then smiled, Rukia thought, a sardonic smile, "You know what the papers said. Suicide. I wanted to kill myself…but I didn't actually. What happened was a damned accident." He took a deep breath in though he had no lungs, "Hisana's father got into a dispute with my dad over something quite silly. He never told me what it was but I believed myself wounded when our engagement was called off. You see; I loved her…she was my first…as they say the hurt goes deeper and lasts longer. When they showed no signs of relenting, I decided I'd prove my love for her by pretending to commit suicide. Leave a note, disappear etc. I left then. Went out into the woods north of here, took my hunting knife and knapsack of gear, preparing to spend a few nights out in the wilderness. Once she'd realize I'd supposedly died for love then I'd come back and everything would be fine."

He stopped.

"Go on," she muttered.

"Well after three days I began to have second thoughts. What if I'd done this and then nothing had changed? I'd be made a fool of. Not wanting that I packed my stuff and set off back down the trail I'd originally taken. About midway…I tripped on a damn rock. I still remember the sensation as my body fell, tumbling down a small ravine. I hit something at the bottom. I looked down at my chest and there it was—the chopped edge of a tree branch, situated low enough for me to hang there as it stuck out of my heart."

He tapped the bloody area, "more the fool I. When I woke up I was here. In my father's house, in my room and downstairs muffled crying floated up through the grate. Karin held it in, but Yuzu didn't. I didn't know…what had happened. That I had died—"

"Ichigo, I know. I understand…you don't have to tell me," Rukia tried to smile but found her lips curving downward at the determined expression on his face, "I have to. Before it's too late. I want you to know the truth."

"And what is the truth?!" she shouted, her voice growing shrill.

Guiltily he looked away, "—I died and no one could see me or hear me. For years I stayed here watching them, my family mourn me until they finally moved away. Faraway. Somewhere I couldn't follow for I realized I was stuck. Confined to this house. Unable to step outside—I knew this then to be my punishment for what I'd tried to do…"

It sounded like a confession. Ichigo met her eyes in one final appeal, "you came then. Your being here is what freed me." She watched as he started fading at the shoulders and she cried out, unsure of what exactly she'd said.

"You'll forget me. You say you won't but I know…I'm dead. You're not. We just weren't meant to be together." He smiled, beginning to melt away, "I love you…Rukia, so much." Was the last thing she heard him say, her own words shattering the air as he disappeared. "You liar!! You said you'd stay with me!"

Rukia dissolved into tears, falling facedown on the bed, her aching fists beating the mattress. She twisted around, choking on the saliva filling her mouth. The door opened and a small boy walked in. He stood exactly where Ichigo had, looking down at his sister, pity reflected in his bright green eyes, "I'm sorry. He's gone isn't he?"

She turned her face up and peered through her watery vision, "you—you saw him too?"

Ulquiorra nodded, Rukia crushed him to her chest, her unsteady breaths rattling noisily through her nose. "Your friend came," he said quietly as Renji appeared in the doorway. Seeing her state, the red head realized what had happened, "oh, Rukia. Gods…I'm sorry!"

She let go of her brother and was swept into a bear hug by the red head. "Shh," he soothed, "I—no. It'll be alright…"

Rukia felt her eyes tearing up again, "but he said—he promised me!" Renji rocked her back and forth, alternatively patting her back, "what did he promise?"

"He promised me he'd always be there…that he'd never leave me! But he lied!!!" her sentence ended on a sharp high note, sobs racked her body. Renji held her tightly never letting go.

~~~Epilogue~~~

She never did see the ghost again. Either immaterially or in the flesh. As Rukia often liked to believe yet it never did happen…was that they'd be reunited. He was, as Hisana had been to him, her first love. She never forgot him as he'd said she would. Through college and then at twenty-five, Renji proposed to her. She turned him down, still waiting for him…the Strawberry ghost.

This story has no real happy ending for Rukia, as she couldn't ever quite forget him; though she married Renji and settled down. She still kept an eye out for that familiar orange-haired man to come walking past her door.

~~~Finis~~~

A/N: I'm gonna cry! Wails…ahem. Sorry, please review!