Akatsuki Christmas Story

Twas the Night before Christmas, and every Akatsuki member was as bored as can be.

The base was decorated with a cheapskate's taste, not a stocking was hung. Kakuzu had them pawned.

In hope his wallet will soon be full.

Tobi was bugging Deidara, soon he may be dead.

While visions of his orange face exploding, in the blonde's head.

And Konan in her nightgown, and pain in his; had just settled their fight.

It could have been a long and fearful night.

When out in the den, Hidan heard a yell.

He sprang from his prayers, screaming "What the hell?!."

Away from his ritual, he flew like a bat.

Pulled out his scythe and kicked some random cat.

The sight before him, glistened with blood

He gave a grin to the scene, as he saw a milk dud.

But who could torture the fool in such away

So annoying in his child's play.

With his speech of third person, with his orange mask,

Hidan knew right then, Deidara was the one best for the task.

Quicker than lightning the curses came.

The blonde yelled and hollered and called out unruly names.

Now Jashinist! Now Angel! Now Sharky and Weasel! On Bomber and Idiot!

On dealer and Leader! And Plant guy...

From the tips of their nails to the hem of their cloaks,

S rank criminals! S rank criminals! All full of jokes!

As the night went on, with all the noise

Tobi just played with his new toys

Deidara, green with envy and anger

wanted to give Tobi the "finger"

As to so much naughtiness he had done,

He received no such fun, son....

As the others frolicked with Christmas cheer,

All Hidan wanted was a fridge full of beer

Itachi told the story of Jolly St. Nick

As he breaks into people's houses like d***

He comes down the chimney expecting food

But not with his naughty attitude

Hearing the story, Kisame wanted to catch the fatty

As his curiosity was driving him batty

He set cookies and milk on the table,

But with his hardened appetite, he ignored the fable

He guzzled each crumb and drip

Hoping when santa arrived he wouldn't flip

Regardless he didn't give a damn

So he went to the tv and watched "Kazam"

As Pain asked which play to watch this year

Deidara still angry answered like a queer

"To hell with the play, It's not a good day!

Just shut up all of you because you're all gay!"

Eyes glued to Deidara from his outburst,

Even Hidan knew that he'd be cursed

Konan breaking the silence spoke up

"How bout we see the one with the reindeer-dressed pup!"

Deidara, annoyed by her suggestion

Hoped she'd get indigestion

Pain, with his mission to "get some" in ploy

Played along with Konan's "Christmas joy"

He knew deep down, he wanted to whack her

but he resisted as her nickname during the holidays is "The Nutcracker"

As the Akatsuki's Christmas Night was full of fun

There was still something to be done

As they broke out the booze and started to sing

They heard their telephone ring

They answered a call ready to sing it

When all they heard was, "Have f***y Christmas, believe it!"

They ignored the call and drank tea

As they cheerfully laughed at the loss of Sasori

But despite the troubles and the fright,

"Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good-night!"

(Happy Holidays from AMTNaruto, Aqua-Lee and the Akatsuki =D)

Sasori: Worst Christmas Ever..... T.T