Title: The Cat's Cradle
Rating: PG-13/ T
Pairings: Lithuania x Russia (future Lithuania x Russia x Poland? )
Summary: There were a lot of things Lithuania knew and didn't know. But he was certain this man was depending on him, and only him. There was no other way. AUish LithuaniaxRussia

- - -

Chapter I

It's been months.

It's been months since he had last heard from him.

He knows he shouldn't care. He knows it didn't involve him and none of it was in his power to help…
But he told them.

"America, we can't stand around and ignore this!" Lithuania was almost pleading.

America's fingers were intertwined and resting at his mouth. His eyes seemed to be staring holes into the polished wooden table. "I know," he says, sighing. For the first time in a very long while, Lithuania notices the aging in his voice. "But we can't make it through the blockade. No one can."

England is sitting besides America and France is sitting besides England. To his right there is Germany and to his left there is Japan.

On his own side, there is no one.

"The Russian government split itself up. America's right, there's nothing we can do," France says. He's almost calm. "We'll have to let Russia fight it out-"

"He's killing himself," Lithuania argues, "By the time the war ends, there will be no more Russia. You haven't seen what's been happening in there." He shakes his head. "It's the Holocaust all over again. No man, no woman, and no child are safe. In Russia, if the other side finds you, you would be better off dead."

It's silent for a moment.

Toris's eyes dart from nation to nation. He knows it's a lost cause to argue any further, but he can't stand it, any of it.

"China is supplying the east," Japan points out. "If any of us decide to assist the western region, he will not be happy."

England curses and everyone focuses on him. "Damn it all," he grinds his teeth angrily, "The government is rebelling against itself. How would we decide to support which region anyways?"

Germany clears his throat and the attention switches again. "We have no choice but let Russia be. None of us knew a dispute would escalate to something like this."

He almost forgot, all because of an energy shortage and the failure to evenly distribute the resources over the land caused this. Powerful leaders who broke off and banded together lit the spark.

America is speaking again, "I'm sorry, Toris."

"Why are you apologizing to me?" he wants to say.

But he only closes his mouth and gazes down.

Later, the meeting ends. Everyone files out except England and Lithuania.

England stares hard at him and he can't look away. "Be careful," he warns. The words are coming out slowly and gravely. "If you get too close, Russia might take advantage of you and possibly seize the Baltics again once he recovers."

He knows.

It took ten years for the war to end. China withdrew his aid after a dispute with the "East"- that's what they, the two sides, were referred to as, "East" and "West".

Without China's support, "West" regained all its lost land in less than a year and forced "East" to surrender.

It was a victory for one side, but it was clear Russia himself had lost plenty and won nothing. Lithuania pitied him and he hated it-- but like everyone else had said, there was nothing he could've done.

Even with the war over, Russia had cut off all contact. He tries calling, he never picks up. His messages are always left unanswered. Lithuania's already busy caring for his brothers and he knows it would be better for all of them if he just kept to himself.

He almost hates Russia for making things difficult. Just almost and he doesn't know why.

-x-X-x-

Lithuania reclined on his leather chair. He had been stuck in his study for almost a full day now going through the endless piles of documents. He rubbed his cramped wrists and inspected his paperwork. By now, he was sick of his own signature; the fluid motions of his pen were already etched into his mind.

Estonia and Latvia try to help of course, but Lithuania always brushes them off, insisting that it was his responsibility. He's been saying that a lot.

The phone sitting on his desk a top a pile of month-old papers rang, almost sending Toris toppling out of his chair in surprise. He bit back a curse as he answered the phone.

"Hello?" He tried to keep the impatience out of his voice.

"Oh my God, Liet! Why haven't you called me? It's been forever!" Poland shouted indignantly on the other line. Lithuania cringed and kept the speaker away from his ear.

"I'm sorry Poland, you know I've been really busy lately", he sighed, rubbing his temples. "Estonia's people want me to lower their taxes and everything but his boss is completely against it. I don't even know why this should be my problem."

It's silent on the other end-- maybe he was thinking, or maybe he simply didn't understand.

"It must be so totally hard," Poland said, quieter this time, "After the whole union thing, you've been working yourself to death, Liet."

There was another pause.

"I'm, like, really worried about you."

Poland was worried about him?

"Sorry," he apologized again, "but it was my idea to have Estonia and Latvia live with me after you know, the rebellions. I can't disappoint them."

"You're just trying too hard! Like, take a break, okay?"

Lithuania figured Poland wasn't going to give up on this, so he didn't bother to explain any further. But then, maybe he was trying too hard to please everyone, but if anything went wrong—no, he wasn't suppose to think like that.

"Thanks Poland. You're right, but don't worry about me, I won't kill myself."

"So you'll call?" He asked hopefully.

He nodded, and then he reminded himself that he was on the phone and that Feliks couldn't see him. "Yeah."

"You better or I'm totally coming over there," he warned playfully.

Liet found himself smiling. "Haha, okay. Talk to you later then. Viso gero."

"Do widzenia." He hung up and set the phone down, the grin fading from his face as he realized he still had a whole packet of papers from Ukraine who was requesting a loan and an audience.

Thinking about Ukraine reminded him about Russia. He still hadn't contacted anyone, including Lithuania. His brow furrowed in deep thought. When the war ended, so did the blockade yet no one dared to step beyond the border. All trade had ceased and Russia had not attended any of the recent world meetings.

There was something wrong—and this time, Lithuania was not going to sit around and do nothing.

With resolve, he tidied up his papers and placed them into several folders respectively and stacked them on his desk for later delivery. On his way to the front door, he noticed both Eduard and Raivis observing him from the opposite doorway to the kitchen.

His back was to them as he said, "I'm sick of waiting. I'm going to Russia's house."

"Do you want us to come with you?" Estonia asked. Lithuania turned so he could look at them properly. Estonia had a tense expression on his face while Latvia was trembling at the prospect of having to go to Russia's house again. Lithuania's expression softened.
"No, it's fine," he acknowledged Estonia's unspoken concerns, "It won't be like back then, it's different now. I'll be okay."

Eduard nodded. "Alright then."

"G-Good luck, brother," Raivis squeaked out. Lithuania smiled reassuringly and he timidly returned the gesture. At that, he opened the door and left.

-x-X-x-

Toris found it highly ironic that the front of Russia's house was overgrown—it was obvious no one had even bothered to tend to it in a while. Did anyone even still live here?

His gaze darted back and fourth as he made his way up the pavement. He took care not to get his feet caught in the vines or the weeds that have pushed themselves through the cracks in the cement.

Despite all the plant life, the place felt like death. The sun was shining down on him, but he felt the coldness seep into his very being—it was terrifying.

"This will be your new home. I hope you will work hard."

The three of them nodded, having no idea about what was in store for them—especially for him, Lithuania.

Toris shivered at the memory. It had been a very long time ago. It shouldn't be bothering him now. Yet, his back began to prickle and twitch.

It seemed like a year by the time he was finally standing before the front door. The stone and wood seemed untouched by both the elements and people. When was the last time someone had gotten this close?

He knew it was pointless, but he raised a hand to the brass eagle head to knock three times. Then he remained silent, straining his ears against the door to see if he could pick up any sign of activity from the inside. His heart was pounding, and after a minute of anticipated waiting, he tried the knob. To his relief and suspicion, the door was unlocked. What was Russia thinking? Did anyone else know about this?

It was as if he didn't care if anyone tried to invade.

He stopped asking himself about the door to focus on his current surroundings. The furniture was exactly the same from over a one hundred years ago—a hundred years since his independence.

However, every surface was covered in a thick layer of dust. Lithuania covered his nose to avoid breathing any of it in. Stepping on the carpet sent up clouds of refuse as he made his way to one of the living rooms, which was parallel from the front door.

The soles of his boots echoed against the tile. He found it safe to breathe again. "Russia?" He asked. There was no answer as expected. "Russia?" He repeated, much louder this time. "Ivan?" He tried, still no response. There was nothing to be heard aside from the beating of his heart.

He tried the kitchen next which was to his right. The sink was empty and clean. The counters were bare except for the dust. Lithuania carefully stepped to the fridge. The only things that were stuck to it were memo notes with sloppy Cyrillic writing on them, and a small calendar—the ones that you tore the pages out of. It looked strangely out of place compared to the stylized objects that were in the house, though that wasn't the only odd thing about it—

It was left on March. Today was April 27th.

It was obvious that Russia was not in the kitchen so he moved on to continue his search.

The office was empty--and room after room, it was the same—empty and lifeless.

Lithuania's chest ached with worry and panic. Russia couldn't be dead, could he? Was it actually possible that the nation had killed himself and nobody would know about it until now?

He was running now. He bolted through doors, scanned the interior, and left for the next room. The storage rooms were empty; the bathrooms were empty. He sprinted up the first flight of stairs and began with the second floor.

This was where the bedrooms were. Toris tried to ignore the violent and painful memories that were flashing through his head as he went through every room.

He slowed his pace to a stop when he reached the door at the end. This was it. This was where he did everything to him. He inhaled deeply, his chest and head pounding.

This is different, he reminded himself. He was stronger now. He shouldn't be afraid. He shouldn't be scared.

But he was.

He placed his hand on the knob—the metal seemed colder than the others.

Then he opened the door.

There was a clinking sound, and Lithuania realized the door's edge was pushing against broken glass and cracked bottles.

They were vodka bottles.

Toris slowly looked up, afraid of what he would find. But he found who he was looking for.

Russia was sprawled with his back to the mattress that was lying to the back of the room. The sheets were in a careless pile on the floor. Lithuania pushed aside the glass with his foot as he slowly walked up to the unmoving country. Russia was only wearing a single layer of clothing along with his scarf. The ends of it were stained with a black substance. With closer inspection, Toris found that it was blood—dried blood.

"Russia?" He whispered softly. He knew he wasn't going to wake up, but he prodded Russia's side gently anyway.

Then he froze.

His heart sped up as he frantically unbuttoned Russia's shirt.

What he found made him sick; he wanted to vomit.

It looked like a canvas was stretched over a skeleton. Lithuania traced each rib with the utmost care. Every ridge he felt under his fingers sent a wave of nausea throughout him.

There were scars as well—these were new, Lithuania figured. Thin lines were crisscrossing over each other to form X's that were distorted by the bone and whatever muscle was still left clinging to them.

Lithuania's eyes and nose began to burn as he held back tears. This was his fault, he could've helped stopped this. If only he had involved himself—to any side, it wouldn't matter—it would've never had gotten this far.

"I-I'm sorry, Ivan…" Guilt clouded his mind as he tightly gripped the tattered scarf. Tears were threatening to spill out; Toris gave up trying to hold them back. There was no one here to see them either way.

Lithuania cried out in shock as a hand flew up to grip his arm. The hold was tightening and the fact that nails were digging into his skin didn't make it all that more comfortable.

Russia gazed up at the startled Lithuania. His violet irises were dead and dull with dark rings beneath them.

"Toris…?" He asked—his voice was faint. Lithuania flinched. "Toris, is that you?" He could only nod—he couldn't find his own voice.

"You came back." Russia let go. Instead, he tried to help himself up, but his arms shook violently before they gave away. He fell against Lithuania who gently supported him. Ivan clung to his arms. "You came back…" He repeated, he almost sounded happy. "I've been waiting forever… I don't want to be alone anymore."

"I'm here," Toris said; it felt like a stranger was using him as a mouthpiece. "But you're not well, Ivan. I need to help you."

"Help…" he echoed, then he chuckled. "Help, I've been wanting that for a long time but-" his voice darkened, "-they didn't want that, they didn't want me to have it. I've been betrayed, Toris."

"Who are they?"

Russia laughed again and moved his shoulders, as if he was shrugging. "The ones I must listen to. They promised me a change for the better, a paradise. But look at me now."

Lithuania placed his palm against the back of Ivan's head as if in an embrace.

"Ivan…"

"I know Toris won't lie to me, that's why I'm safe now, right? I'm safe because Toris is here with me again." He nuzzled against his shoulder and Lithuania could feel his ribs rub against his middle.

"I'll make you better," Toris whispered. "I'll have to carry you out, you're starving…"

Russia didn't say anything, but let himself go limp so Lithuania could place one arm under the crook of his knees and the other under his shoulder. Russia was larger than him but Toris wasn't weak, and the lack of muscle mass made it easier to lift him up and carry him. The scene would've looked almost comical—comical if it weren't for the situation.

Russia gripped the front of Lithuania's green blazer as he grimaced. "It hurts, Toris. My entire body… It feels like it's falling apart, like it's being torn."

Lithuania was focusing his eyes on the stairs as he carefully stepped down them, careful not to bump Russia. "You're going to be alright, I promise."

He relaxed in his arms. "If that's what Lithuania says…"

When he reached the bottom, he looked towards the sofa and remembered that it was still coated with dust. With one arm, he supported the frail Russian as he quickly dusted with the other.

When he was done, he gently placed Russia on his back on the piece of furniture.

Without Russia's feeble body heat against him, Lithuania noticed how cold the bottom floor was. He undid and slipped off his blazer and placed it around Ivan, who smiled.

"It's warm…" He said, huddling up against the article of clothing.

Before he knew what exactly he was doing, Lithuania reached down and brushed a blonde bang away from his face. He quickly withdrew his hand but Russia didn't seem to have noticed.

"I'll be back with something," Lithuania said. Russia didn't reply and so he turned around in the opposite direction towards the kitchen.

-x-X-x-

Earlier, Lithuania had already figured out that Russia had become even more unstable, but he was still different in another way. The intimidating air he normally gave off had faded somewhat. Toris had the feeling that anything at anytime could crush and destroy Russia. He felt so fragile, breakable, vulnerable while he was in his arms.

With difficulty, Lithuania forced himself to focus on the food he was making. He found his old apron in the pantry after checking he had the right ingredients. There were enough carrots and onions, but the celery roots had already spoiled. There was no fresh chicken--or chicken broth so he had to settle with canned broth and frozen meat.

Lithuania's hands were shaking dangerously as he sliced one of the carrots. In his mind's eye, he could see the flash of silver and the stinging-burning pain that would follow.

Suddenly, the knife that was in his own hand slipped and cut open his second finger. He hissed in pain, as he quickly lifted his finger away to avoid getting blood on the food. It wouldn't do him any good if he got blood on the floor as well, so he doused his entire left hand under the faucet.

After a moment, he turned off the water to inspect his wound. The incision wasn't too big, but it wasn't very shallow either. Blood was still leaking out of it so Lithuania stuck it in his mouth while searching for a band-aid.

After a minute of impatient searching, Lithuania accepted that Russia did not keep his first-aid supplies in a place like the kitchen, so he settled with tying a piece of paper towel around the cut.

Being more careful this time, Lithuania finished with slicing the vegetables and proceeded to dice the thawing chicken.

When he was done, he dumped the pile of ingredients into the simmering broth. He sighed.

This isn't much—I'll bring something from my house later.

Then with a jolt, he remembered that Eduard and Raivis were still waiting for him at home. His eyes darted to the clock on the stove; it had been almost an hour since he left. He should probably call.

With his right hand, Lithuania rinsed the cutting board and placed the knives he used in the sink to be washed later. He dried both his hands before taking the nearby phone from its place on the wall and dialing his own number.

It was Estonia who picked up. "Hello?"

"It's me," he replied.

"Lithuania!" He cried out, " We were getting worried. Poor Latvia was… well you know how he is."

Lithuania rubbed his head. "I'm sorry." Toris realized how much he had been apologizing today. "I was a little occupied."

"Well, did you figure out what happened?"

"Yeah… But I can't talk about it right now. Hey, Estonia?"

"Yes, Lithuania?"

"You didn't tell anyone about this right?"

"No, we were too busy waiting but did you want us to--?"

"No, no," Lithuania said quickly. "I-I'll explain later. Well I have to go now, the soup is boiling." He hung up before Estonia could ask about anything else.

He's probably upset with me now, Lithuania mentally sighed, I'll make it up to them later.

Lithuania leaned against the kitchen wall and slid down couple inches. The front of his head was throbbing. He knew exactly what he was getting himself into.

Burying his head into his own two hands, Lithuania took a long moment to wonder what the hell he was going to do with Russia.

Then he remembered that Russia was literally starving to death, so he rushed to pull out a bowl and pour out the steaming soup. "The ingredients aren't the best," he mumbled, "but it'll have to do for now."

He was pleased to see that the soup had thickened as he placed it on a tray and spooned it around.

"Russia," he said as he stepped out into the living room with the tray, "I made something. Please eat."

There was a soft murmur of acknowledgment as Toris set the food down onto the long table—well at least it was something.

With difficulty, Russia pushed himself upright, the green blazer sliding off him slightly. Lithuania rushed to help him. "I'm sorry there isn't any bread." Toris wasn't really sure about what else he should say.

"Lithuania is kind…" His voice seemed a little distant as he reached forward for the spoon with shaking hands. Lithuania quickly gripped his hand and the utensil for support.
It'll only be for a little while. He'll get better and when he does, things will be back to normal, Toris told himself.

However, Russia wasn't looking at the food, but at the makeshift bandage Lithuania had made for himself.

"Are you hurt?" He asked softly.

Lithuania blinked. He didn't think Russia would notice—or even care for that matter, especially when he himself was a walking skeleton.

"I-It's fine."

But Russia didn't think it was fine for he tenderly took Lithuania's injured hand into his own and carefully undid the bandage. "Oh Toris…"

Russia was being gentle, but Lithuania still had to force his body from trembling in his hold.

Cold fingers traced over the crosshatching scabs. Cold fingers dug, unforgiving, through blood and skin.

Healing wounds turned back into bloody lacerations. Tormented cries remained unheard.

Bright red blood began to bead at the surface of the cut. He thought it would have stopped bleeding by now.

Lithuania's eyes were on the other-

--And that other did something Lithuania did not expect.

Without a word, Russia took Lithuania's injured finger into his mouth and closed his eyes, resting the incision against his tongue. Toris felt warmth surround the stinging lesion as Russia delicately rubbed it with his tongue, cleaning the opening of the cut.

The air was cool against his now-wet skin as Russia slipped Toris's finger from his mouth and kissed it. It was only a kiss—there was no biting, no ripping, no pain.

"Be careful Toris." He smiled. He smiled. Lithuania thought it looked warmer than the ones in the past. This smile was not cold, it was not a lie, it was real.

When was the last time Lithuania was unafraid of his mere smile?

He found his own face grow warm.

"Th-thank you."

He offered the spoon to him, not wanting to delay his nourishment any longer. Russia began to wolf down the food hungrily. Lithuania closed his eyes as continued to support him. Or maybe it won't be for a little while.

He didn't know if this happened because of his own growth after adopting the rest of the Baltics—or if it was because Russia really was going to die.

What he did know, however, was that the man in his arms right now was depending on him.

But what do I owe him? After all...

But Lithuania pushed the voice out of his head. He couldn't dwell over the past.

Maybe all of this was a sign.

Russia finished and leaned against his arm comfortably. "Toris… I'm… tired," he said as he closed his eyes.

Lithuania brushed his hair lightly. "Rest," he breathed, "I'll be here."

Maybe this all was a sign… that all of them could start anew.

-x-X-x-

TBC in Chapter 2, if I continue. What do you guys think? Should I go on? I know Im really bad at making up history, Im sorry x-x

Well here are some notes and things to have on mind.
The foreign words Feliks and Toris used at the end of their conversation mean "Goodbye" in Lithuanian and Polish respectively.
In this universe, Estonia and Latvia had a few skirmishes over resources (similar to Russia) and Lithuania stepped in, which led to an agreement that Estonia and Latvia would both move in with him, forming a union.

Seriously though, the "history" isn't going to be the main point of the story (or will it?) I do want to add in Prussia but I'm not sure how to bring him back to life owo… Help?

Well, I hope you guys like it so far. Tell me if you want me to go on.

Please Review~