Sorry for my long hiatus. There's a story behind it trust me.
Hopefully I'll be back in the swing of things soon.
To everyone on the forums, I'm realllllly sorry.
Think of this as an apology gift.
Ugh, now to tackle my inbox. Thanks for deciding to work now, computer. :)
Stop
Kallen is always working. That's what you know best about her. She runs around a mile a minute and if she's not working on her Knightmare's latest upgrades she's busy reading the manual. As if she actually even needed one. If she's not yelling at Tamaki for being an 'idiot' she's just following you around.
( "Because, you suck at running," She retorts, crossing her arms as she looks away.
"I mean, I didn't think anyone could have such low stamina."
You tell her that she doesn't have to follow you around the whole time if it's too much trouble--
"It's not! I mean it is!" She scowled, and you laugh and ask her if she's talking to Zero or to you.
"...Oh so Zero can run five miles?" She stammers, and blushes bright pink before stomping off.
You tell her that walking away isn't part of being a good bodyguard.
"Oh you shut up!" )
Which is why you are so surprised to find her sleeping.
Her arms are propped over her Knightmare manual and her mouth is slightly open, her eyelids smoothed out; all the visible signs of strain lines there when she's awake all but nonexistent. She's calm in her sleep. The raging hurricane that is Kallen is subsided into a peaceful, almost child-like little redhead who is even snoring lightly in her sleep.
You wonder if it's strange to think that you like her best when she is sleeping. You find it strange that you're even thinking this at all, because Kallen and like sound strange together while at the same time entirely right.
She's angry when she's awake. She's always angry at something, staring out at the world with big, burning, hurting blue eyes. Looking out as if to say: Come and get me, I'll take on every one of you.
So is it so wrong to see Kallen asleep and happy? Sure, she's beautiful when she's awake. Because she's a whirlwind of emotions and moving hands and shifting gears and bright eyes but to see her stop and sleep, makes her seem so fragile.
You need Kallen to be fragile because when she's around, you feel so weak.
You replace the self-made pillow of the Guren manual with a pillow from one of the rooms and you find yourself removing your cape while doing it. Maybe it's because you don't want your ace pilot to get cold because if she gets sick how unfortunate for your future plans. Or maybe it's because she does so much for you that this is the least you can do.
She stirs briefly, mumbling soft, meaningless little words. You want to hear them. Her voice never sounds this soft, or this warm.
And then she says your name.
"Lelouch." She says aloud, softly, sighing as she buries her head further into her pillow. A piece of red hair falls over her eyes; as she smiles a little bit. She never talks to you.
"Stop acting so scared. It's not like you at all, you idiot." She retorts in her sleep, and your mouth twitches because she's always scolding you for something while complimenting you at the same time.
"They're going to love you." She insists irritably, and her voice is full of warmth. You wonder who 'they' are, and Kallen only continues her one-sided monologue directed at you.
You.
"..Lelouch..come on..I..want you to meet my brother." She mumbles, and turns on her side.
Oh Kallen, you want to say. Because you know her brother is dead, and that he's the only man Kallen will ever love and there's no point in thinking that she's actually talking to you but--
"Hahah relax. He's a lot like you after all..you'll be fine. I want you to meet my family." And you know that Kallen's family is her mother now, and that she can only find those loved ones in her dreams. You wonder if Nunnally would have turned out like Kallen had you been lost as early as Kallen's brother had.
"Okay Kallen, I'm coming. " You say softly, and Kallen smiles so brightly, so happily in her sleep that you are momentarily speechless and without words. For once in your lying, manipulating life.
"Good. Don't worry. You're a lot alike..."
"So don't worry.."
And you wonder that if you let Kallen be the woman who is beside you in her dreams, how much your life would change in your every day moment. But then you might lose her. So you decide that it's enough just to hear her dreaming about you.
"..I've got your back." She says drowsily, and for a minute she seems to know she's dreaming because she shifts back to talking about her brother.
"Onii-chan..am I doing a good job? Y'think I'm doing okay..? I think I made a good choice with him..right?" Her voice is soft and vulnerable, as she sighs in her sleep.
And you gently stroke her hair, her messy red hair, and you tell her that she shouldn't try so hard. That it's okay for her to get tired. That you're thankful for her. That's she's doing just fine.
And then you leave her sleeping, because eventually everyone will have to wake up.
So you'll let her sleep just this once. It's all you can do for her. She won't let you do anything else because she doesn't want your help or you 'pity' because she's too busy looking after you.
"Yeah..I think he's gonna be great...don't you think?"
--
"Lelouch?"
"Yes, Kallen?"
"Um..why is your cape here?"
"All according to plan, Kallen."
sorry everyone. i'm back now?