Ten minutes earlier

"Oh, you boys," Barbara scoffed as she wheeled herself up to the mirror and reached for the hairbrush. "I'm surprised anything gets done here without a woman to see to all of you."

"Now, that's sexist," Dick laughed as he leaned against one of the bed's wooden posts. He watched her start brushing her red hair, gazing at the strands sliding through the bristles.

After a few minutes, Dick wandered over to her side and took the brush. He stood beside her, brushing her hair. She leaned back and sighed as his rough fingers played with her hair, soothing her scalp and reaching down to rub her neck and shoulders.

"That feels good," she sighed. "A little to the right. There, that's the spot."

"You always feel good," Dick murmured. He leaned down to kiss her on top of the head, and then Barbara pulled him down so they could kiss properly.

They made out for a few minutes, and then Dick pulled back.

He held a finger to his lips as he looked towards the doorway. "Someone's out there," he whispered.

Barbara looked towards the door, and sure enough, she could see the shadow of someone kneeling outside the door. She lifted her eyebrows in question.

"Tim?" Dick whispered. "You want to have some fun with him?"

Barbara nodded, smiling mischievously. "What are you thinking?" she whispered back.

Dick's eyes twinkled with naughtiness. "Oh, Barbara," he said in a normal voice, a little louder than usual. "Oh, yes, take the bra off."

"Here goes the bra," Barbara played along. "Goodbye bra."

"It's coming undone," Dick grinned. "What? Oh, no, your boobs are falling down to your knees. There they go all the way down."

Something clattered on the other side of the door, but Barbara pushed down a laugh.

"It's okay, Dick. Sometimes I take them off altogether. You know how I like sex without any breasts on."

"Oh, oh, right there Barbara!" Dick bit his lip to stop from snorting in laughter. "Yes, I love it when you rub my wrists! Do my elbows next!"

"Only if you tickle my cheeks first. No girl can bear to have sex without getting her cheeks tickled!"

On the other side of the door, Tim craned to hear any sound he could. He tried not to breathe, not believing his own good luck at getting to hear his older brother get it on with Barbara. He pressed the glass as hard as he could against the door, wishing he had time to go down into the Batcave and snatch the real listening devices that Bruce had designed. Tim would have liked a video camera in there as well, if he had to be honest.

Then without warning, strong hands grabbed him around the ribs, lifting him up to his feet.

"Eeee!" he squeaked in surprised.

Bruce said nothing as he picked his youngest ward up and carried him to his room, gripping Tim under his arms and keeping him a few inches off the ground so he couldn't walk. Tim didn't struggle, but the minute they reached his bedroom, he launched into a round of pleading.

"No, Bruce, I didn't mean to listen. I was just going by, and I heard something so I stopped for just a second."

Clark followed them in and shut the door. He marveled at Bruce's strength of will when the man, who had been thoroughly spanked not minutes before, sat down on the bed without even wincing. Tim whined as he got pulled towards Bruce.

"No, no, don't punish me. I know what I was doing was wrong. Please, Bruce. Clark? Clark, tell him no."

Clark blinked at being included, and he felt even further shocked when Bruce looked up at him for a second. Clark nodded sternly, but Bruce lectured Tim,

"You don't lie to me, and Clark is not here to get you out of trouble. You respect people's privacy in this house."

"But Dick gets to go into her room," Tim objected.

"Dick is an adult and what he and Barbara do together is their business and not yours," Bruce scolded as he tipped Tim over his lap and secured him with one firm hand on his back. "You remember this the next time you feel the need to spy on other people in this house."

Bruce pulled his hand back and smacked Tim's bottom soundly. The boy whimpered, and Clark shifted slightly. He felt sure Bruce would never purposefully hurt his teenage son, but he wondered if Bruce would take his own frustration out on the boy. Yet, Clark did not want to step in between them, undermining Bruce's authority and making Tim think that he could use Clark to intervene whenever Tim got in trouble.

"Ow, no, I'm sorry," Tim cried out as he was spanked. "Just stop! I'll do what you want. I'll train more and I'll study more and I won't argue and I'll get rid of my video games."

"What!" Bruce barked out. "When did you get video games?"

"I got a few for my PSP," Tim reached up to swipe away two big tears that fell from his eyes. "I spend my allowance on them."

"Your allowance is suspended from now on," Bruce said as he spanked four more times. "I obviously have been far too lenient on you, a mistake I plan to remedy immediately. Since you've been engaging in such shameful behavior, I will make sure that you have more constructive ways to spend your days, starting tomorrow morning."

He swatted Tim five more times and then set him on his feet. "Bathroom," Bruce pointed a finger. "And then straight to bed."

Tim streaked towards the bathroom and shut the door, but the sounds of his sobs came from the other side.

Bruce looked at Clark sharply, but Clark dropped his gaze to the ground.

"Out with it," Bruce ordered.

"No," Clark shook his head, "I have no right to tell you how to raise your children."

"Tell me what you're thinking," Bruce demanded.

"I think you know what I'm thinking," Clark looked straight at him.

Bruce considered him for a second, but then he sighed and stood. He went to the door and waited. After about five minutes, Tim came out in pajamas, blinking very red eyes, but not crying. Bruce reached for him, and Tim flinched away.

"None of that," Bruce put a hand on his shoulder. "I hope you learned a good lesson."

Tim nodded, saying nothing.

Clark sent Bruce an encouraging look, and Bruce scowled, but he moved his hand onto the back of Tim's neck and pulled him in for a hug. A confused look crossed Tim's face, but then he threw himself into Bruce's arms and hugged him as tight as he possibly could.

"I'm sorry, really I am. I'm so sorry," Tim babbled as he hugged his adopted father. "I promise I'll be good, I never meant to be bad."

"You're not bad," Bruce sighed. "But you can be extremely disobedient, and I'm not allowing it anymore."

"Okay, okay," Tim sniffed. "Just don't be mad at me. Don't be mad."

Bruce avoided Clark's look as he walked the boy over to his bed. Tim's response was completely out of proportion, in Bruce's opinion. He had given the boy barely a dozen smacks, and he felt irritated at how distraught Tim became.

Once in bed, Tim rolled on his side towards Bruce and gave the man the saddest look Clark had ever seen. The teary eyes, the flushed cheeks, the miserable lips – Clark felt his heart pang in sadness for the kid.

"Go to sleep," Bruce ordered. "Clark, come on."

They went, Bruce shutting the door on Tim's sniffles.

Clark stared down at the floor.

"What?" Bruce growled.

"I didn't say anything."

"No, but you look it. You think I was too harsh?"

"He shouldn't have eavesdropped," Clark admitted. "And then he shouldn't have lied about it. That behavior should be corrected."

"But?" Bruce prompted.

Clark hesitated, torn between wanting to speak his mind and respecting Bruce as a father.

"Spit it out," Bruce ordered.

"Well, as your friend who wants to support you, I wish you would have handled that with a little more care about Tim's feelings. And as a fellow crime fighter, I wish you would understand that good leadership does not mean you have to be so harsh and unbending."

"And as my boyfriend?" Bruce challenged.

"As your boyfriend, I wonder if another round over my knee would adjust your attitude," Clark hissed.

Bruce flushed and he glanced to Tim's closed door and then down to Barbara's closed door. "We're up here now – you can't do that when the children are around."

"No, I can't," Clark said quietly. "Because I respect you and your authority as well as your feelings. I would never want to be too harsh with you."

They stood there for a second, glaring at each other, a silent battle of wills. Bruce finally sighed (more of a snort of disgust) and whirled to stomp back to Tim's room. He opened the door and said,

"Stop crying. Go to sleep because we're spending tomorrow morning as a family, going to the movies."

"Really?" Tim pushed himself up to his elbows.

"Yes, and we're going to have a good time, whether you like it or not."

"Popcorn and candy, too?"

"Don't push it," Bruce shut the door.

Clark tried to hide his smile, but Bruce pointed a finger at him.

"Do not make this worse. We're going to bed before you make this worse."

"Indeed," Clark followed him, "I wouldn't want to do anything to make this whole matter worse."

Half an hour later, they were snuggled in bed. Well, Bruce was on his side and Clark snuggled next to him, spooning him tight. He expected Bruce to start fussing about what happened in the Cave. But for once, Bruce settled down and went to sleep.

-----

"I want to sit in the front, in the third row," Tim balanced his popcorn, drink, and candy as he waited for Dick to grab napkins.

"We have to sit in the handicap row," Clark reminded him, glancing down at Barbara.

"You don't have to sit with me," Barbara began, but Bruce had already reached out and popped Tim on the back of the head for such a senseless remark.

"But we can probably sit anywhere," Clark assured them, "especially since someone bought out the whole theater for us."

"I wanted to make sure we got good seats," Bruce protested.

"It's a morning show – there wouldn't be more than five other people in here," Clark shook his head.

"But they might want our seats," Dick grinned.

Ten minutes later, they were in the dark theater. Dick handed Tim his popcorn and drink and swooped in to pick up Barbara out of her wheelchair.

"Grayson," she gave in with an amused sigh, "must you?"

"I want you to sit in the middle with us," Dick leaned in to peck her on the lips.

Bruce rolled his eyes, disgruntled at such sappiness. "I don't want to sit so close to the front," he objected as Dick carried Barbara to the fourth row of seats and planted her in the middle. Tim followed along with the food, leaning his head down to eat right from his bucket.

"Go along and enjoy it," Clark encouraged him.

"No one listens to me anymore," Bruce began, but Clark put a warning a hand on his rear end. The younger superheroes didn't notice, but Bruce stiffened.

"Clark," he whispered in concern, "please."

"Then smile and look like you're having a good time."

Bruce glowered for a second. But then he forced his mouth up into a smile (more a grimace than anything) and he went into the row of seats, sitting next to Tim.

Bouncing so much that he nearly spilled his popcorn, Tim grinned at him. "Thanks for bringing us, Bruce. I told you we'd have fun."

Biting back a retort, Bruce kept his grim smile and reached his hand out. Tim pulled back for a second, scared he would get smacked again, but Bruce tousled his hair and squeezed the back of his neck before settling back in his seat.

Tim turned to smile at Dick on his other side and then down at Barbara. He took three gulps of soda.

The lights began to go out, and the green preview screen came on.

"I got to go to the bathroom," Tim whispered, setting his food aside.

Frowning, Bruce pulled his legs in to let Tim slip by.

"Shoot," Dick said as he crunched his popcorn. "They put too much butter on ours. Bruce, can we borrow some of your popcorn?"

Like a martyr, Bruce handed over his popcorn and turned to glower at the screen.

Clark smiled affectionately. He put one hand over Bruce's wrist that lay on the armrest. He felt Bruce relax.

Tim came back during the third preview, tripping over Clark's legs and nearly falling into Bruce's lap. He sat down and managed to spill half his popcorn on the floor.

"It's okay," Dick whispered. "You can have some of Bruce's."

"That's it," Bruce said in his best Batman voice. "Next person to move is going to run laps when we get home."

Clark bit back a smile and stood up. "I'll go get more popcorn. Kids, try to calm him down until I get back."

Bruce leaned back in his chair, ignoring the three grinning faces turned in his direction. There were days where his family was too much to bear. Other days they were barely endurable.

The End