On The Other Side, a fullmetal alchemist fanfic

Hey! Well, my second favorite band Delain (first one Within Temptation) just released a new album "April Rain", and there is this song "On The Other Side" that inspired me for this oneshot, both music and lyrics. This is set just after Ed transmutes himself to get Al back in episode 51. This is a peace of Trisha/Ed motherly-son bond and Ed/Al brotherly love. I hope you enjoy it! I would recomend you to look out for the song in YouTube and listen to it while you read this, it's worth it.

I hope you like it! Enjoy!

On The Other Side

by Delain

Will you wait?
I'm on the Other Side, the Other Side
Will you wait?
I'm on the other side
It's too late to tell you what I'm about
But God, I'm proud

A giant in the sky
A light flooded horizon
A silent peaceful cry
And the sun that is rising
Warms me up
Warms me up
Wears me out

Will you wait?
I'm on the Other Side, the Other Side
Will you wait?
I'm on the Other Side

It's too late to tell you what I'm about
But god, I'm proud
God, I'm proud...

A different kind of quiet
A different kind of warning
You've said your last goodbyes
And left your daughters mourning
Breathing in
Breathing in
Breathing out

Will you wait?
I'm on the Other Side, the Other Side
Will you wait?
I'm on the Other Side
It's too late to tell you what I'm about
But god, I'm proud
God. I'm proud...

The array is ready.

The circles in my body are done.

Rose and Wrath are gone; I am alone in this place.

I am ready.

I must admit, I've never been more scared in my life. And that is saying something. But I have to do this, I must. Al is gone, he's dead, my little brother is gone, sacrificed himself for me. So I could come back. Envy killed me and my little brother bravery pulled on the human transmutation to bring me back.

Al, you're an idiot.

How could you do this? Why did you bring me back knowing that you would die in the process? Am I that important for you? Al…I don't think there is a way I can express my gratitude for this. All this time, I thought you hated me, because of what I did to you. But you just sacrificed yourself for me. You told me several times you could never hate me, but I was never sure.

I am now.

But I just can't live knowing you died for me.

"Maybe life has no equal trade. Maybe you can give up all you've got, and get nothing back. But still, even if I can't prove it's true, I still have to try, for your sake, Al."

I placed my hands over my chest. It's time.

The light takes over the place, and I feel my grip on reality go away.

Al, hold on, I'm coming.

The now familiar sight of the Gate is on my eyes. I can't say I'm brave, I'm scared of the outcome, but nothing will stop me now, not again. All I've done, I've done it for you, Al. This is no different. I can't step back now, it is do or die. Even if I die, I know you'll be back where you belong, home.

"We meet again, huh? Gate of Truth. I'm back here because I have something to ask you for. I'll give my heart, I'll give my soul and I'll give my life, but in exchange I want my brother back to life. Mind, Body and Soul. Please…"

I feel a great surge of energy, my feelings are clouded, I don't think I've ever felt like this, so confused. So afraid. My legs are trembling as I wait for the Gate to open and reveal the Truth. To reveal my and Al's fate. Many times I've felt like crying, but this time, I can almost feel tears burning my eyes.

Why is it taking so long?

Suddenly, the Gate finally opens, and I am expecting to see all those little evil eyes stare at me and their tentacles take me and shatter my body, my mind, my soul and my will.

But I was wrong.

I can't hide my surprise, because I don't see those wicked eyes, I see something else. Is that…is that a person? Why is there light behind him, I can't see anything but the silhouette. What's going on? Shouldn't those eyes be mocking me?

I walk nearer, slowly, step by step, trying to understand what's going on.

Wait a second…

That person is not a he, it's a she.

No…it can't be…it's…

Mom?

It is her; she's there, smiling at me, in a white dress. Her brown hair, her gray-blue eyes, she so beautiful and that angelic smile I missed so much. It can't be…it can't just be. And, she's sitting, holding something on her arms, is…that a body she's holding?

My heart just stopped, I'm sure of that. I can't feel anything, like if my whole soul had just stopped working if you can call it that way. It just can't be. Maybe, maybe I'm hallucinating, that would explain it. Yes, that would explain it.

Mom? Mommy?

Suddenly, my heart and soul wake up again, and I feel such a rush of emotions, happiness, comfort, relief. If this is a dream, then it was the most beautiful dream I've ever had. My eyes are watering, and I feel the drops of water that are tears run down my cheeks.

Before I realize, I'm in front of her, and I just don't know what to say.

"Mom?"

She smiles at me, she's real. Her eyes, so beautiful, so beautiful I think I've forgotten them. How long has it been? Five years since I've last seen them, almost six. My whole body is trembling, I know, I can't help it. I'm so nervous, why isn't she saying anything? I'm afraid…

"Edward."

I snap out of my thoughts, she just said my name, with that sweet voice of hers, full of love, unlike Sloth's. I realize it is really my mother, the woman in front of me is my mother, Trisha Elric, the most wonderful woman that has ever existed.

She reaches out for my hand, and I feel my body energized. I feel happy, and I cry louder.

I kneel in front of her and our eyes meet. I can only mutter some words while I sob out of a mix of regret and ecstasy. "Mom…I'm so sorry…please forgive me, forgive me for everything, I'm so sorry, so so sorry. Mom…mom…"

She wraps her arms around me, and I realize how much I've missed those two arms, those strong arms that reassured me that everything was alright now, or at least, for that moment. My mom…my mom is hugging me.

I've been hugged many times in the past, Winry, Maria Ross, Teacher, Riza Hawkeye and even Major Armstrong.

But no embrace can compare to the one of my mother.

I return the embrace so strongly that I think I might break both of us, but I don't care. She doesn't care. All that matters is holding on tightly, an embrace to make up for all the years and tears gone and lost.

An embrace to express all the love we have for each other.

"It's alright Ed, my brave man, I'm so proud of you." She said in that beautiful harmonic voice.

I slowly let go, and stare at her, unbelievably. "But Mom…I did something terrible, I performed the forbidden, the taboo.. I ruined Al's life, I joined the military…I've killed…even if they were homunculus, I killed. I don't deserve to…carry on…"

She placed her hand over my cheek and caressed it; he eyes look so soft on me, so comprehensive. "Ed, you made a mistake, everybody makes mistakes. I'm proud of you…for all the things you did to help people in your journeys; you've done many valuable things for others that would make any mother proud of. Helped the Ishbalans, helped the people on Lior, helped people that needed guidance and assistance in a way or another. And most of all…I'm proud for the way you've taken care of your little brother."

She leans back a little, and I realize what she's holding.

Who she's holding.

She's holding Al's ten-years-old body.

I gasp, surprised.

It's him, my little brother, it's Alphonse Elric on the flesh, with his body back. But…is he complete?

Mom looks down to him with a warm smile. "I've been holding him like this for five years, waiting for the day when he would wake up complete, like he should be. Ever since he lost his body, you've been trying to get it back, fighting endlessly, not hesitating. And even when you had chances that compromised people, you chose the right path. I'm proud of the way you love him…"

My eyes soften, and I look at him.

He's naked, I wonder if he's cold. His skin, his hair, he looks exactly the same. He looks asleep, he looks like a little angel, and I realize I don't deserve him. He's given up so much, so much, but he's here. So much fights against evil, against the Homunculi and Dante, so many losses and tears…but I think it's worth it, now that I see his face...

"Would you like to hold him?"

I look up to Mom, who is smiling at me.

I nod.

I slowly sit down in front of mom and carefully take Al into my arms, and cradle him like if he was a baby. I brush the hair from his eyes and caress his skin. "Hey Al…I'm…you're here…you are finally here."

My eyes are releasing more tears; I missed touching his skin so much, I missed to feel his warmth so much. But he's finally here. Within my arms. I don't think I've ever been this happy, if I believed in Heaven, then I was already in it.

All that matters down is holding him tight.

I lift my eyes and gaze at Mom again, with an uncertain look. "Mom…is he…?"

Mom looks at me with a comforting look, knowing what I want to say, but I'm unable to express in words. "The Gate…will give him back, with his body restored, like it should have always been."

I smile, that's the only thing I've been waiting to hear in the last years, a reassuring voice that would tell me that Al was going to be alright after all. And that voice was the sweetest voice. And now my mistake is fixed, at last.

He's ten again, he'll have his childhood back. Al, I promise you that you will be happy this time, no more sorrow. You deserve it little brother, you deserve to be the happiest person there is. Because of your noble and sweet heart. Al, you're complete again.

However, not everything is perfect.

I lift my eyes and gaze at Mom, whose eyes sadden a little, as well as mine. But I have to ask. "Mom…what is what I have to give in return for Al's life? What is the Equivalent Exchange for my little brother? Do you know?"

Mom looks down and takes my hand. "The Gate wants your arm and leg again…"

"I'll give them!" I say quickly. I don't care to lose my limbs again, as long as my little brother is whole again. It was my fault he lost five years of his life as an empty shell; it's just fair that I lose my limbs again. Anything for him…

"Ed…"

Mom looks uncertain, what is it?

"What is it, Mom?"

Mom looks at me with that sad look, a look I remember so well. It was that look that she gave to the world every time she thought about Dad. What does that look means now? She's scaring me…

"Ed…The Gate also wants you to leave this world." Mom said to me with that low voice that expressed sorrow. "It wants you to go to the Other Side. To that other world beyond the Gate, where your father is. He wants you…away from Alphonse."

No…

Away from Al? Away from my little brother? Away from a piece of me? Away from a piece of my soul? No…but it makes sense. Not only the Gate is taking a part of my body, but it also wants part of my soul, one that can be torn apart if I'm separated from Al. It's fair, and I'm going to do it. I'd rather live away from Al, than have him dead or incomplete. He deserves way better. I'm willing to accept this sacrifice if it means the happiness of the person I most love in this world. A part of me will die if I'm away from him, but I don't care. All that I care about is his happiness.

I wipe the tears of my cheeks and smile down at my little brother, who is still in my arms, seemingly sleeping. "Al..."

"…Brother?"

I gasp a little and look at his gray eyes, now open.

Open after five years.

He looks tired, but his look at me is one of pure content, I can tell. I wonder if he knows how much I wanted to see those gray eyes of his, so similar of those of Mom. I caress his hair lovingly, careful. I don't know, but I feel like if I am to rough, he will break. I run my fingers over his skin, as a symbol of the love I have for this ten year old child.

I smile at him. "Hey Al…guess what? I got your body back, as I promised. You won't be alone at night anymore. I'm sure that as soon as you're back, Winry and Gracia will make you a big apple pie just for yourself. Do you like the idea?"

Al smiled a bit, still looking half-asleep. "It's pretty…"

"But…" I have to tell him now, if I don't, he'll hate me. "Al…I have to go…it is the price…"

"Go? Where?" He says, it seems he is finally realizing what's going on.

I lean down and press my forehead against his. "Big brother needs to go to a place…where Dad is. He needs to go in order to get your body back. But don't worry, he doesn't know how, but he'll get back to you, someday. Will you wait Al? I'm on the Other Side. It's too late to tell you what I'm about… but will you wait for me?"

Al nods with a faint smile; he cuddles closer to me and closes his eyes once again.

I slowly lean down and kiss him softly in the cheek. "I love you, Al. Very much…don't give up on me…ever. Wait for me, on the Other Side."

I give him a second kiss and hand him to Mom again, and kiss her on the cheek as well, as lovingly as I can. "Goodbye Mom, I love you, and I miss you."

Mom nods and caresses my cheek again. "I love you too, my little Ed. I'll be waiting for you, one day…"

I stand up and cross the Gate, the last thing I see before it closes is the shape of Mom holding my little brother tight. I don't know what the future holds for me, but I know Dad and I will figure it out. Meanwhile I can be content, knowing my little brother is going to be alright.

One day, we'll be together again. Al, wait for me please. I'll reach you again, and we'll be a family again. Just wait for me…I hope you remember that I'm on the Other Side…that I'm alive.

The last thing I remember before waking up in London, with Dad beside me, was me trying to bring Al back. Nevertheless, I have a faint memory. Somehow, I have a feeling that that memory is not something fake. I'm sure I saw Mom and Al on the Gate. I don't remember it all, just their faces…

One thing is for sure, Al is waiting for me.

For both of us, we'll be together again.

Just wait for me, Al.