The 10 Reasons Why NOT

A Reffie Project

Summary: I can't like him, and if I do, I have to be totally mad. Insane! Crazy! Ever since that time he started talking about ten reasons why I should go out with him, I couldn't get him out of my head! So to try to remedy that (and my boredom) I tried to list off ten reasons why NOT, why this liking for that silly redhead is ridiculous. - Yuffie

The Yuffie counterpart to The 10 Reasons Why ME by Reno. This sort of takes place after that fic. It's sort of longer that some might even consider it as 10 Reffie fics in one, cuz each reason has some story. Long live Reffie! I like reading Yuffentine, too, but Reffie happens to be my ultimate favorite shipping. Enjoy!

I have got to be mad.

I don't know, not exactly, but what sane person dates a notorious redhead of the dangerous variety? I mean, ugh. THAT is madness. And I swear he especially ticks me off, and I can't even stand him, but why… Oh, why…

Now that my days traipsing about Midgar aiding reconstruction projects are over and since I went back to Wutai, I can't help but… I don't know, miss a certain someone. Gawd, I don't understand how it could turn out this way! I try to bring myself to think of deep black hair and crimson eyes, but instead I think of fiery red hair and clear aqua orbs. I don't know WHY!

And I don't know why the heck I caught the first ride off Wutai to go back to Edge the moment that I couldn't put up with the torment—torment!—any longer. Agh! I don't know why I even went back to Edge, Godo is so gonna kill me, and Tifa and everyone else is so gonna ask why I went back. And I won't have any answers to give 'em! I planned to keep in hiding for a while in a small apartment here, keeping the fact that I was in Edge for no reason at all (aside from missing a certain redhead) secret. But THEN I just happened to bump into Elena at the streets to the fastfood. ELENA! Gawd, Elena, workmate of the redhead. Member of the Turkeys. Ugh. I hope she doesn't tell him, but I don't think Elena is the kind who'll keep her mouth shut.

Reno! He's the cause of all this weirdness. When I see him I am going to give him a good one with my Conformer…

I can't like him, and if I do, I have to be totally mad. Insane! Crazy! Ever since that time he started talking about ten reasons why I should go out with him, I couldn't get him out of my head! For Leviathan's sake, get out of my head! It ain't your home, Turkey-boy!

So to try to remedy that (and my boredom) I tried to list off ten reasons why NOT, why this liking for that silly redhead is ridiculous. Ugh!

10 – HE'S A TURK! TURK, GIRL!

I don't even need Tif and Cloudy to remind me of it. He's a Turk and while Avalanche and them people at Shin-ra have temporarily gotten together for the benefit of the planet, he's STILL a Turk. He and I still exchanged hits and blows and materia attacks way back then, and he caused me a whole lotta pain and I did him the same. The Turks and Avalanche aren't really close friends even if we work together now—they are just a weird group, Rude and Reno and Elena and Tseng and all. While we in Avalanche have done our fair share of killing and doing shady stuff… the Turks are totally different. They live off that stuff! It's what they do for a living, something they've been doing since God knows when…

9 – CLOUD AND CID AND BARRET (AND MAYBE EVEN VINNIE) WOULD HUNT HIM TO THE WORLD'S END IF HE EVER MADE ME CRY

Even Tifa would hunt him down. I stayed then at Tifa's bar, at one of their spare rooms. Cloud once sat beside me at the bar one late night after Reno saw me home.

"He's going to make you cry, you know," Cloud said, as if to the air.

"What?" I asked, feigning innocence.

"Reno. You've been going out with him, right, Yuffie?"

Oh gosh, how could Cloud know? "Grossness, Cloud! What in the world are you—"

"Tifa saw you two one time. Elena did, too."

"We're together all the time," I said, and then kicked myself mentally for the words I said. "I mean, we're together just because Reeve teamed us up. It's not unusual if we sometimes grabbed meals together…"

"He's a Turk. You're from Avalanche."

Great. So that explains everything. He's a Turk! You're from Avalanche!

"The fight's over, Cloud," I told him. "And there's nothing between me and the Turkey. Nothing. Zilch. Nada."

"If you say so. You be careful, Yuffie."

But the silence that followed as he stared into his drinks communicated all that he thought. If he makes you cry or hurts you, he is going to seriously pay. No one, most especially not a Turk, hurts an Avalanche member.

8 – HE DOESN'T HAVE A LAST NAME NOR DO I KNOW IF HIS NAME IS HIS REAL NAME!

"Reno?"

"Hm?" He wasn't even distracted from his ice cream.

"What's your name?"

That made him look up to me. "That's a stupid question. You just called me by my name."

"No, your full name."

He paused, and then answered, "Reno."

"Reno…?"

"Just Reno."

"So you don't have a last name?" I was losing interest over my own ice cream because of how he was acting. I always wondered about his last name and there he was, acting like he didn't have one…

"Maybe I do, maybe I don't," he said, and then ate off his peanut butter ice cream. I stared at mine, mocha, which was starting to melt.

After a silence, I asked, "Hey… Is Reno even your real name?"

"Maybe, maybe not."

"Duh! You're so boring!"

He shrugged. "Babe, I assure you, you don't want to know. It's Turks stuff. I could tell you, but I'd have to kill you. And believe me, I don't want to kill you, not when Spikey and his gang are still alive to exact revenge."

"I can't believe I agreed to go out with a guy and I don't even know his last name! Or if his name is his real name, even!" I'd bring my father, and my mother, and the entire royalty of Wutai to shame!

My outburst didn't even affect him; he just looked up from his ice cream with a weird grin. "What, Vincent Valentine sound like a real name to you?"

I blinked. Oh, now he's gonna bash Vincent again. "Don't even get him involved in this, Turk. This is between you and me…"

"He's ex-Turk, yo. I'm going to bet you that Vincent Valentine isn't his real name. The way the his initials both begin in V is sorta suspicious."

"We're not talking about him, but you!"

I don't know his last name if he has one, or his real name if he has one!

7 – HE MADE ME RUN IN THE RAIN ONLY TO SEE MY CLOTHES CLING TO ME (aka HE IS ONLY A STEP LESS LECH THAN DON CORNEO)

This is such a ridiculous event that I don't even want to recall it, but I should because it's a reason NOT to miss him! I still can't believe this!

I don't know why the heck I picked that white blouse that day—I mean, the morning was so sunny that I thought, oh, it's a sunny day, might as well wear something light colored! But why in the world that white blouse, and the white pants as well?!

"Legs, it doesn't seem like this is stopping, yo," Reno told me while we were underneath a shed, waiting for the goshdarn heavy rain to subside. The warm morning was betrayed by the afternoon.

"Stop calling me 'legs'. Don't you ever bring an umbrella?"

"Sorry, honey. I don't ever. Unless my work dictates me to…"

"That is so lame!" I told him. "Real men are supposed to carry an umbrella!" I had no idea where that came from, but he could at least be more prepared.

"Real men ignore the rain and run underneath it, yo."

I rolled my eyes. "Then why aren't you running yet?"

He gave me a teasing grin. "Of course it's since I'm with you, princess Yuffie. Why, you'd never run in the rain. You might get a cold or stain your clothes in the mud, right?"

"You saying I'm afraid of the rain, Turk?" But he got one of the reasons right. I hated the mud on my white pants!

"Didn't say anything like that…"

"Hell no, I'm not afraid of any rain!" I told him. I rolled up the hem of my pants, and told him, "C'mon, I'll prove it! Or are you the one scared of dirtying your shiny black shoes?"

So we counted off to three, and then ran into the heavy downpour, and he was laughing all the while doing it, and I ended up laughing too. I was reminded of my days in Wutai—I used to run around the rain and splash around the little puddles.

He slowed down, and I did too, in the middle of the streets and he held his hands out and lifted his face to the rain. In that moment, he seemed… hot, the way his fiery red hair clung to his face, water trickling down…

Ugh. I should bump my head on a wall. Okay, forget I said all that!

I laughed, and he turned to me, and grinned. The raindrops were loud, clanging against steel roofs and the street. Then he looked at me from head to foot. I was drenched! But the look he gave me made me shudder in the slightest. Was there something nasty on me?

"There's one thing I love about the rain, Yuffie!" he screamed, he had to so I would hear him over the downpour.

"What?!"

"Girls wearing white end up wearing transparent!"

I gasped, immediately knowing what he was talking about. I turned red, and crossed my arms over my chest. "Lech!"

He just chuckled. "Oh, c'mon. At least it proved that you are a girl!"

"Say one more word and--!"

He laughed again, and took off his black coat, putting it over me. I held the thing close to prevent his eyes from seeing things he shouldn't, no matter how heavy it was of the rain. "Well?" he said, holding a hand out to me, "Let's go, yo!"

I ignored the hand he offered, and ran off before he did, but he still outran me. Ugh.

6 – HE TOTALLY RUINED MY REPUTATION IN WUTAI!

"This is madness, Yuffie!" Godo practically screamed as he slammed the local paper to his desk. "What were you doing in a club? With a man?! You shame me!"

I rolled my eyes at the irony of the event. I went to drink to forget about Godo lecturing my ears off, and because of that, he still ended up lecturing my ears off. "I am also a private citizen, and besides, I'm legally eighteen! At least, in four months… but that doesn't matter!"

Uh, yeah, the following scenes after that are too bad to recall.

When I saw Reno again, the first thing I wanted to do was slash him dead. "You frickin' took advantage of me, Turk!"

He stayed calm. "Yuffie, legs, babe. Let me tell you this, yo, and I was neither alcohol-induced nor wasted. YOU kissed me, period."

"D-Dammit, I did not! I wouldn't do that in a million years!"

"Babe, don't deny it, you know YOU did it."

And the worst thing is that I knew he was right.

5 – THE ONLY THING HE'S LOYAL TO IS SHIN-RA

This doesn't have to be explained as it can be understood as plain as day. He never had a girlfriend, and he's been serving Shin-ra since gawd-knows-when. He's lied for Shin-ra, stole for Shin-ra, killed for Shin-ra. He should probably marry the company! I bet if Shin-ra ever told him to kill me, he'd wouldn't even have to blink, he'd just do it.

4 – HE SMOKES AND DRINKS FOR A LIVING (OR DEATH)

No explanation needed. I am sooo annoyed by his smoking that it's more than once that I tiptoed to grab his cigarette away from him, but nooooo, he is just darn tall that I can't even reach it! And then he'd just laugh and stick his tongue out at me, saying, "Sorry, midget!"

He's chain-smoking, alcoholic, and he calls me a midget. Great.

3 – HE HAS GOT TO BE SCARIER THAN DEATH WHEN HE'S NOT HAPPY

"Reeenooo…"

"What?" He tapped the ash off his cigarette, not even looking at me.

"I don't think this is a good place to stay in…"

The place was dark, smelled of smoke and cheap liquor, with people talking, couples touching, whispers here and there of secret transactions. He ignored them all, his attention on the line of shot glasses in front of the counter before him.

"You scared, Yuffie? You can say so."

"I-I'm not scared," I told him. I could have lied.

He exhaled some smoke, and said, "Well babe, welcome to the shit that is my life."

"R-Reno? You're drunk…"

"No, I'm not. I just took the time to see things clearly, babe. This is practically my home, Yuf. Cheap liquor, secondhand smoke, sleeping with whores. They call me a Turk, and I wear a suit, but I'm still a dirty murderer in an even dirtier world. Shit. I don't understand how I got here at all, Yuffie." (5)

"Reno, let's go home…"

"Don't you understand, babe? This is my home. You belong in your palace, in your pastel colored world where everything tastes and looks sweet. You're a princess, you belong in your palace. I'm a murderer, I belong in the dirt. You're innocent, and I'm anything but that. Do you understand?"

I shuddered at the tone of his voice, the words he was using, the look on his face. "I don't want to, Reno. All I understand is that you're scaring me. Please don't scare me."

"I'm not scaring you, Yuffie. Just telling you the truth."

There was silence, and I just stared at him. He dumped his cigarette into the bar counter, and gulped down another shot. I almost always just see him smiling, just see him carefree. That night was different. That night scared me.

"Shit, Yuffie," he said. "I'm the one who's scared. Of this life I'm living in. I'm going to rot here, you know that?"

I put a hand to his back and stroked him there, wishing that would comfort him. "Hey, you can always change if you want to…"

"Change?" he scoffed. "You think I can change, Yuffie?"

I shrugged. "Only you can answer that."

"Right." He held another glass, and held it so the liquid inside swirled. "This is weird. It's unlike you to sound mature, and unlike me to be sober. I think I'm drunk."

Then he said, "I think I'm scared of something more… I think I'm scared that your world is so much different from mine, Yuffie. Shit, I'm scared that I might love you already, you know that?"

I jerked up, surprised. "R-Reno!"

He chuckled. "That does it. I am drunk. Saying things I don't know. Forget I said that, huh, Yuffie?"

I just nodded, hoping it would make him feel better. He's scary when he's not his usual self…

But a part of me was also scared about what he was scared of that night… that our worlds are too different…

Ahhh, I hate this!!

2 – HE MADE ME PAY FOR THE FOOD LAST TIME WE ATE OUT

Argh! That one time! I can't ever forget that!

It was supposed to be an alright date… well, I wouldn't even call it a date, since a date is supposedly a pre-arranged thing, and he was just all, "Hey, wanna grab something to eat?"

Well, I couldn't say no as I was really starving, and we just came from a bothersome job checking that constructions of housing projects and all that was okay and alright. It actually amazed me how much he knew about the constructions—he was the one going, "This one's wrong, yo," or, "the measurement and allowance isn't right".

"I didn't know you were quite the handyman, Turkey."

He just gave a smirk. "Babe, I'm expert in deconstruction. To know how to bring things down, you gotta have some knowledge of how they were put up."

I almost giggled, but then he looked thoughtful as he looked at the place, and then sighed. "Besides, I'm part the reason Midgar's like this…"

I knew about what he and the Turks did under commands of Shinra, even though I wasn't there to witness it. I heard a great deal about it from Cloud and Barret and Tifa. "…You mean, the plates---"

He shrugged, and snapped, "Hey, Yuf, wanna grab something to eat after this? I skipped lunch, and I wouldn't mind an early dinner."

I didn't know what to think, so I just absentmindedly said, "Alright…" And then immediately added, "So long as you're the one paying!"

He laughed to himself. "Aww, babe, you're starting to get used to that, huh? Never should have done that the first time…"

And so we were walking for about half an hour deciding where and what to eat. Really! Usually he has plans, and usually I have stuff I want, but that night was different. We were walking half an hour in uncomfortable silence, looking through the fastfood places and restaurants.

"Hey, brat, just tell me where you want to eat," he asked again, for probably the tenth time.

"I told you my answer. The most expensive place, of course! And stop calling me brat!"

"Sure, we can go where you want, so long as you're paying your share…"

Silence again.

"Hey, brat."

"What, Turkey?"

"You're leaving for Wutai tomorrow, huh?"

"Y-Yeah… That place is my home, you know?" I told him. "Godo isn't so happy about me being gone for so long—he thinks I'd disappear out of the blue again. Besides,"—I tucked stray hair behind my ears--"I've got political stuff to take care of at home…"

"It's hard work being a princess, huh?"

"Yeah…"

"So I won't see you in a long while, huh?"

"Uhm, yeah…"

We were walking in silence again when he said, "I might miss you."

I turned red. I swear I turned as red as his hair! "R-Reno--!"

His face lit up but it was because we stopped by a window of a fancy restaurant, and he said, "Hey! Maybe we can do something fancy, you're going away tomorrow, after all. And I'm that hungry. C'mon."

I just wordlessly followed him to the restaurant, and we got our seats. It wasn't hard for me to pick something from the menu—I usually order the most expensive things when he's paying, and he'd usually go for something saner because he knows I'll stick him with the bill. Which he did, despite how hungry he claimed to be.

When we were finishing, and I was picking off the small slice of cake served to me, the waiter sent us the bill. He took it, as I expected him to, and THEN he started acting weird, looking into his pants pockets and his coat pockets and feeling around his clothes. Oh gosh.

I hoped what I was thinking was not happening. He slowly looked up to me and smiled that killer Turk smile that spelled trouble.

"Yuffie…?"

"What?"

"You didn't, by any chance, take my wallet, did you?"

Oh, gawd. I choked on the cake and had to take a gulp of water. When I recovered, I said, "Reno, you did not."

"I did!" he said. "I'm missing my wallet!"

"You can't! Gawd, Reno, this isn't funny! You can't have misplaced it, you couldn't have been robbed—you're a Turk, for heaven's sake!"

People were starting to look at us, and I told myself to keep my voice low. Oh, and did I just scream he was a Turk to the public?

"Yuffie, this isn't funny," he said, his face serious. "If you're hiding my cash, you'd better bring it out now or else I'm—"

"Are you accusing me?! I can't believe it! You're accusing me! How can you do that! You might be hiding it yourself just to get me to pay for your meal!"

He abruptly got up, almost making his chair fall over. A lot of people were looking at us then already. "Hiding it! Hey, brat, you can go ahead and search my entirety and I'm betting you it isn't on me! I lost it, shit!"

I got up as well, red in annoyance. "Hey, redhead! You can go and search every inch of me and I'm betting you I don't have your wallet!"

He paused, and then tilted his head to a side with a smirk, eyes flickering with mirth telling me that I just gave him a bad idea. "Oh, I'll take you up on that offer, Yuffie."

I replayed the thread of conversation in my mind, and then understood what he meant. I blushed. "You le--!"

His smirk wouldn't fade, "You were the one who suggested that, babe."

Aaaagh! I stomped my heel in annoyance to the floor, and fell back to my seat, and he followed, more calmly. I returned to the cake I was finishing, not at all in the mood to eat it though it was good. He slumped his chin on the table.

"I don't care about you, I'm paying my share and you go wash plates or something."

"Well, we can always run away…"

"I'm not doing that!"

I finished my cake, and he just sat there, staring at me. When I took out my money, he was still staring. I rolled my eyes.

"Pleeease, Yuffie?" he pleaded. "Consider it payback for all the times I paid for your stuff?"

"No."

"I won't call you brat, or pest, or legs, or ninja-chick ever again…"

"Well, of course. I'll be going away tomorrow, and you won't see me again, so you don't have to call me names anymore."

He pouted exactly like a little boy would that I honestly found it cute. W-Wait! Hell no, it wasn't cute!

"Yeah, it's our last dinner and you're leaving me like this…"

I groaned. I did make him spend a lot on useless things before, so I gave in. "Alright! Alright, Turkey! I'm paying! But just this once!"

He straightened from his slouch and smiled wide. "Yeah! Thanks! I knew you loved me, brat!"

"Did you just call me 'brat'?! And this has nothing to do with love!"

Later I found out that the bastard left his money home.

1 – And the Number One reason why not… GAWD I CAN'T THINK OF AN ULTIMATE REASON WHY NOT!

I guess it's all those things piled up together that make for THE ultimate reason why not. Everyone else is right. I'm Wutai's princess, and he's a Turk. His job requires that he has no personal attachments with anyone, and my role requires that I devote my time to Wutai. He was never the one-woman guy—Cloud was right, he'll make me cry. He's just a carefree red-haired devil, and I'm sure I'll find better guys. More responsible, more mature, more committed, and NOT a Turk. But then again…

Redhead's actually one of a kind, and a more responsible, more mature, more committed, less carefree, less fun, less dangerous guy just wouldn't be the same.

…Hey, am I allowed to say that?! Darn it, this is all so messed up! Gawd!

Yuffie almost tore the paper, but then…

"Yo!"

The sudden greeting startled the ninja so much that she nearly toppled over her desk chair. "AAHH!!"

Speak of the devil. A certain redhead peeked through her window---and she was on the third floor. Reno jumped into her room, making himself welcome. He dusted himself and his black shoes soiled her carpet. She made a face.

He saw it. "Aww, you can vacuum that later, babe."

"What are you doing here?" she asked pointedly.

He shrugged, holding his hands out. "Nothing, princess. Your knight in shining motorcycle just climbed the tower to rescue you because he has nothing else to do."

She rolled her eyes when what she really wanted to do was laugh out loud. "Give me the real reason, Turkey."

"Aww, why so tart? I just heard from Elena that you were around, and I decided to check up on you. I knew you'd be back, missing me and all."

"I did not miss you!" But she had missed him so much she had to write ten reasons why she shouldn't. "Please, Reno. Stop dreaming. Me? Miss you? Not a chance!"

"If you say so, legs. By the way, what's that you're doing?"

She had been writing off the reasons why she shouldn't miss him. She immediately sat down on her desk, over the piece of paper. "Nothing!" she said.

He smirked, a smirk that would send people running. "Aww, there's something there. Let me see, let me see!"

"No, you can't! This is absolutely nothing! This is a boring document, Turk! Keep your hands off!"

But he was still able to nab the piece of notepaper from underneath her, not very hard for him to do. He laughed as he read the header written in her clumsy print letters. She hid in a corner since she knew she was beet red.

"Ten reasons why not me?" he said as he read. "Honey, why would you want to remind yourself of reasons not to like me?"

"B-Because I have to!"

He continued reading, occasionally laughing or snorting. She stayed underneath a low table, flat on her stomach, as if she were caught in the middle of an earthquake drill.

As he finished, he said, with some sort of chuckle, "You did miss me, Yuf. For you to write all these stuff."

"I-I did not!"

"That denial thing you've got will kill you one day," he said. "And anyway, what are you doing underneath the table? There's no earthquake, sheesh. Nor am I going to throw breakable objects towards you for the stuff you wrote."

She didn't move. She wouldn't want to give him the pleasure of seeing her red face.

"Well, you did pretty much say every possible insult you can say, but you pretty much hit things dead on," he said. "I'm a Turk, you're a princess. Your friends hate me, and I can't say my friends would like you. You don't know my real name, I'm a lech, and I'm not the one-woman type. And I'm not quitting my smokes. And all that trash, Yuf. You got them right!"

"I know!" she said, still hiding. "That's why this is ridiculous, and so I was mad to even go out with you! We should—eeep!!"

She shrieked when she was suddenly looking into his blue eyes when he peered down under the table and crawled underneath as well. She looked away.

He grinned. "I didn't know you could be shy, yo."

"S-Stop it, redhead!"

"Y'know, babe… I could probably write a hundred reasons why I should be pissed by your very existence, but I only need one reason not to do that."

She blushed more furiously.

"…It's a waste of pen ink and paper."

"You--!" She almost hit him, but she hit her head first on the table. She lay down flat again, scratching her head. He laughed.

"No, seriously, Yuf. I only need one reason. Who cares for the why nots and all that? All I care for is that right here, right now, I'm happy being with you. To hell with the why nots."

"R-Reno…"

He got up, and she slowly followed after. He scratched his head, and said, "Oh, darn. Look at the things you do to me, babe. Talking like that is so not me, yo."

She could only stare at him silently.

"And oh, Yuffie?"

"Hm?"

"You got one thing wrong. Your Avalanche pals wouldn't hunt me if I made you cry."

"They'd kill you before I even shed a tear," she offered.

He gave her a grave look. "Nah! Because… I won't make you cry. Least I'll try my best not to."

And he grinned at her, and shrugged. She smiled back.

To hell with the why nots.

End.

A/N:

Date finished: Thursday, March 19, 2009 1:36 AM

EDIT: I made it shorter and fixed a mistake about Vinnie's birthday.