A/N: Okay, so I was stuck in traffic today and this came to my mind, without even being related to HIMYM and I thought: what a cute way to meet somebody! Then, later I was reading some fanfics and I had been thinking about writting one of my own, but never really got around to it... Well, here it is, my first fanfic! I would really appreciate comments, as well as criticism, includind the grammar and stuff because I'm portuguese so English is not my native language... Hope you like it 'cause I sure had fun writting it!
How I Met Your Father
"Oh my God, Ted, I've aged a gazillion years just standing here listening to you tell that story! Kids, what do you say about cutting the crap and getting to the ACTUAL part where we meet?"
**FLASHBACK**
Damn traffic. I am never driving in New York City again! Never, ever, ever, ever, ever… Okay, that's not true. But this sucks! How am I ever going to get to my interview on time? This is just great! My alarm didn't go off, my hair is a mess because I have the actual "fresh out of bed look" and not the one I work to achieve, my suit is all wrinkled, my heel broke and I ruined the really nice Marc Jacobs shoes I got on sale and I didn't even have time to "read" a magazine! This is quickly turning into the worst day ev… Okay, seriously, WHAT is that idiot honking about? It's pouring rain, we're not going anywhere, douche!
I swear to God, if I hear one more honk… Okay that's it! Where the hell is my yellow umbrella? Got it!
"Hey, are you blind by any chance? Can't you see the line's not moving anywhere just because you're honking like a maniac? Just what I needed: an endless succession of mishaps on the one day I need to look my best and some jackass that can't control his own nerves and is just getting on other people's to make himself feel a little bit better!"
"I…"
"Don't even try to interrupt me, I'm not finished!! You know what, I bet you're one of those guys too…"
"What guys?"
"I said do NOT interrupt me! Those guys who see a woman behind the wheel and then suddenly everything that happens on the road just has to be their fault! Just like that guy the other day: 'Hey dude, check out the girl who just crashed into a Porsche stopped in a red light'. Well, I'll have you know that I am a great driver and sometimes it's just hard to master your mp3 player and drive at the same time, you miss things! It wasn't even bad, it just needed a new light…which I paid for! That's beside the point right now! Have we established that you're craziness ain't getting us nowhere? I'm waiting for an answer!"
"Sorry, I wasn't sure if you wanted me to actually speak…"
"Well, I do now! Are you clear?"
"Like water… I just thought you might want to know that I wasn't honking… That guy behind me was…"
Oh. My. God. It is just my luck. Laying it all on the wrong guy. Poor thing. He's actually really cute… Oh, what did I do…? Worst, what do I do now? Oh God, just smile and apologize…
"I'm really sorry… I just figured it was you 'cause the sound came from near by and I saw you through the rearview mirror waving your arms in the air like you were really pissed…"
"Yeah, I was… At the asshole who wouldn't stop honking!"
"Again, I'm really, really sorry… Okay, I'm let you go now… Just gonna go back to my car and probably shoot myself... Oh, but I don't have a gun. I guess I'll just take a few pills then… Man, don't have any of those either… Aaand I'm rambling… Again. Sorry. I'm gonna go now."
That's it, just walk away and don't look back. Don't look back at the really cute guy you just lectured for no good reason. Don't look back at the seriously hot guy. Don't look back at the guy with the perfectly disheveled hair… Damnit, why did I look back?! He was looking at me too, probably thinking I'm completely insane. Can't really blame him… Just get in the car and don't look back again!"
"You know, it's not fair…"
Oh my God, what does he want? Why is he walking up to me?
"I know, I shouldn't have screamed at you like that… But I said I was sorry."
"That's not what I meant. You practically ate me alive and now that you know it wasn't me you're not gonna the same to the guy who was guilty?"
Ohhh.
"Well, I don't think I have it in me anymore…"
"I do. I just got screamed at for a long time, and a friend of mine likes to believe in something he calls 'the chain of screaming'."
"What is that?"
"Long story. The point is… It's time for me to release the berzeker!"
"Wait, where are you going?"
What's he doing? He's walking straight to the guy who was honking… Oh Jesus, he tapped on his window. That guy looks seriously pissed… God, he's gigantic! And he's stepping out of the car! Oh my God, he's holding cute-disheveled-hair-guy by the collar! I have to do something…
"Sir, there's no need to get physical. He was just expressing an opinion and it is a free country."
That beast didn't even hear me! Okay, if that's what you want, that's what you're getting!
"OUCH! Stop hitting me with that umbrella! Are you crazy?!"
"Let him go and I'll stop hitting you!"
"Okay, geez! Bunch of sick people!"
"Thanks, but I had it covered… Was just about to really show him what Ted Mosby is all about…"
"Ted Mosby, hum? Nice to meet you… You owe me an umbrella."
"I'll gladly give a new one. Is yellow a pre-requisite?"
"Kind of… It's my favorite color."
"Yellow it is! But first, what do you say to a cup of hot chocolate?"
"Sounds perfect…"
"Look, the line's moving, we have to go. Have you heard of McLaren's?"
"Sure, I love that place!"
"Awesome, meet you there in 10?"
"It's a date."