It has been a while… I know. But I can't help but feel so damn unsatisfied with my works. I have a couple of almost complete fics but I just can't get around to fix them to my liking… bleh!! Another RK from moi~ though beware for change in perspectives, it is not directly indicated but it ain't hard to guess. ;D I don't own.

XXX

You and Me, Them and Us

XXX

How many times was this? I didn't bother asking because it has been too many times. So much more than I could remember, so much more than I could keep my fingers up to count. The reports we wrote, for the missions we were assigned together, were placed in a corner of Komui's office, but it was hardly enough to keep count of how many run-ins we had stumbled upon.

And I dropped my hands to my sides.

Because I ran out of fingers to count.

000

The scratches of metal against metal were so painful to his ears. He clenched his teeth and landed on the ground, boot heavy as it contacted the dust and sand. There was a small cloud of gray and yellow as he gave a cough, there was blood on his hands. The smash to that building's wall did more harm than he had thought; he just hoped that the internal damage hasn't been bad enough for the need of organ reconstruction.

He wiped the corner of his mouth with the back of his hand, his ears pricked up as he heard a shout.

"Yuu!" God, it was him again. "Behind you!"

But he still jumped nonetheless, obligating to that voice because he knew it was hardly a joke, taking a running start towards the clearing, he heard metal grinding behind him, slashing through the air that he left behind. He turned too swiftly for his boots to stop the slide; dropping down to one knee, he skidded till he was facing the monster.

His knee throbbed with the scrapping sting of dirt in the torn skin and flesh.

It had scissors the size of his whole body, it snipped, it snipped and its canons were concentrated right at his head. It gave a shrill chuckle as it fired away at him and he unleashed the first illusion, mouth moving to the words that was carved into his head.

"Kaichu—"

He jumped back, narrowly avoiding the bullets that stabbed themselves into the earth. The ground was covered with pentacles before it started to dissolve into the soil, fading from black to gray. It gave a nasty sneer and a few more snips of those twin scissors before it suddenly dove right at him, blades rusting from past blood shed with a raw intention to kill.

"Ichigen!"

Hot white light flashed from the tip of his katana, multiple red eyes blinking, almost too rapidly to be noticed as they aimed for the monster with the scissors for hands. The blood was poison and it sprayed right across his uniform with a splitting scream. They tore it apart and he backed off, black blood trailing off of his clothes as its skin and flesh was ripped into shreds of metal and Akuma poisons that lay limp at the ground.

It exploded with a bang and that was that.

He took a gaze around.

000

Pick a side, already. I am tired of waiting for your pointless brooding at the corner of my room. Hey Yuu. Hey you. Theirs or ours? I wanted to pound those words into your head or shove it raw right down your throat. Pick a fucking side already. I gave a snare and yanked you up with a tight grip to your elbow; my fingernails biting into the skin. Which is it going to be? You shook your head and I pushed you out. Closing the door, I leaned back, knowing full well you couldn't.

So was this the last time?

000

He looked down at the red stained uniform, the white was streaked with crimson ribbons and the black was simply black. It felt heavy and it was sticky with the all too familiar copper stink. And with a quiet complaint muttered in his mother tongue he wrinkled his nose in disgust of himself and everything else around.

From the other side of the clearing, he emerged from the sand, from the dust, from the cloud of nothingness that almost dragged them from the living to the dead; it was a scary balance that left no room for neither of them to cry. But then again, they were two full grown men who had more pride in them then to let a few drops of tear to leak down their cheeks.

His red hair was a maroon, so toned down by the hazy surrounding that it seemed like a smothered flame but his green eye was still too much.

Like the leaves that swayed in the summer breeze.

Kanda couldn't help but look away.

000

Your room was always so quiet, and that's why I came, time after time. But today you were unusually patient, I felt at edge till your fingers wrapped around my elbow and you tugged me up with a force. Theirs or ours? You asked again. Yuu? Do you like to bully me that much? But I don't say that out loud, for if I did, Mugen would be pressed against my throat, cool metal touching my nervously heated skin. Theirs or ours? Are there no mine's? The door closed and I heard his heavy breathing from behind the door.

This had to be the last time.

000

His hammer reverted back to normal size; it lay in his palm, and he couldn't help but fiddle with the wooden handle before sliding it back against his thigh. Rabi was walking, boots crunching. He slid a grin out like a well-preserved mask before giving a quick jog to the man standing in the middle of the clearing, staring off to the distance. "You 'kay?"

His slur was back but there didn't seem to be blood on him. Kanda didn't find the mood to complain and responded with a nod of his head. "Fine." The grumble was hard to miss but Rabi didn't seem to mind the reluctance in his voice.

They were side to side; hands so dangerously close as they walked off the clearing, eyes surveying the grounds for any leftover demons that could have survived. Dead silence bored into the two and they surrendered, knowing there was no chance there could be a single pulsing sliver of Akuma flesh.

They could both feel the heat of each other's body.

Kanda took a few faster and larger strides, pulling a wider distance between them; he couldn't help but want to get away. And the tap on his shoulder broke his stare with the gray specks in the sky. The finger gave another tap, right on the bruise that was trying to fade. He didn't wince and he didn't shrug the hand off either, just directed his blue eyes to the side, catching the green one in one slow process after winding down from battle.

"Hey Yuu…" His voice sounded crack and he swallowed thickly to sooth his vocal cords.

"What do you want?" It was less of a snap but too rude to be a calm reply. The tapping ceased but the bruise continued to hurt. Rabi gestured to all that blood, covering him, almost from head to toe before asking, voice no longer cracking, rather it was much smoother, much warmer, too much like honey, too much like Rabi.

"You aren't hurt right?"

"It's not mine's."

It was a simple reply that brushed away the attempt of a conversation, a try at care. He turned back to the road ahead where the bricks laid in crumbles and the walls were layered over with a coating of dust from all that debris.

000

Our side or their side?

I had wanted you to know.

Ours as in the Black Order, though I never really considered it as mine's. And theirs as in the whole Bookman Clan with the little panda man giving you tips along the way like a lost little puppy with a pen for a leash.

Up until a month ago, I knew you were the Bookman's pet. Slaving over records and using that well preserved mask like it was your last lifeline. It made me feel pity, not to Rabi (that good for nothing usagi) or to Junior (that work fanatic) but to the body that the name is leading around with a kink for over exhaustion.

But until you collapsed on Rinali during a mission and almost got yourself killed, I couldn't help but ask. Was it really worth it? But of course I didn't say that, just changed up the words and swap some for others.

"Ours or theirs?"

You gave a smile and I was almost afraid your cheeks would crack in half. You and your red hair were dunk in gloom and you were just a walking, chatting corpse, wavering right on your two feet with that grin, shamelessly plastered against your face.

"You know I can't choose."

The smile never left your face and it never faded, though it looked like a wiry frown and I couldn't help but wonder, how much of it was reality and how much was it the tricks my head played on me? I didn't know whether I was talking to Rabi or Junior but I was fairly sure you were ready to collapse on me. But I am no Rinali, far from that kind-hearted mess of a young girl who is willing to catch you. I won't and I think you knew that too.

Truth is, I couldn't have cared less what you chose.

I had just wanted you to know.

000

Rabi went back to the motel with an excuse of some records needing to be finished. He stood at the corner of the street and waved till Kanda had turned his back on him. He had dragged himself up the stairs while Kanda took the shortcut along the alleyways to the train station, hoping to find the time of the next train back to London, England.

The man behind the bars had given a reply, voice thick with a foreign European accent. "The train, it comes in the morning; you have about... nine more hours to kill." He gave a tap at the surface of his brass watch.

And just when Kanda turned to leave, the man had uttered another string of words smothered by that accent.

"The sky, it's a dusty red and people with your silver crosses should stay." The man had eyed the silver cross pinned to his chest and the katana strapped to his waist.

"The demons have not rest, slayer."

Kanda raised a brow as the last syllable left the man's lips and he let out a dry laugh and turned around, the train wheels scratched into the rails and pulled to a stop. Metal grind against metal, the squeak had hurt his ears but he had called out none the less, only out of habit to correct the man in the train station of his choice in words.

"I'm an Exorcist, old man."

He disappeared into the crowd of people that poured off the train from a city in France. But his high ponytail kept him in sight until he left through the busy station gates.

And with each step that brought him closer to the motel, Kanda wasn't quite used to the feeling of unease as he caught sight of the sun, setting behind the roof of the small dainty place that wasn't just quite his taste.

000

Not even bothering to fish the keys from one of the pockets in his exorcist jacket. He knocked, knuckles rapping against the wood of the door. He leaned against the frame and let out a short breath as he waited for the red head to open the door.

It wasn't long before the door was pulled open and Rabi leaned out to take a peek. With the sight of his fellow exorcist he pulled out a large grin and asked, head cocking to the side. "Are we going, Yuu-chan?"

"Train comes in the morning." He pushed the open gap a bit wider as Rabi headed back inside; he followed with a small nudge of his foot to shut the door.

And only with full view of the red head did he notice a large red gash that had extended from mid back to the base of his spine, ending right at the waistband of his uniform pants. He was still bleeding.

"What are you staring at?"

Kanda's eyes snapped back into focus, Rabi had already turned around with a curious blink at his stare. And the Japanese plainly stated with a slight frown as he dropped his jacket on to the chair by the table.

"Your back."

"Oh, the cut." He had a faint hint of a smile and the other could not understand why he could even sound so indifferent, as though the wound wasn't carved right into his own body. "I tried cleaning it but… it didn't work out so well." Rabi gestured to the washroom; Kanda walked over and peered in. Bloody bandages littered the floor and smears of red fingertips dirtied the walls, it practically screamed unsuccessful suicide attempt with a thousand slits to the wrist.

"Just sit down already."

Rabi silently took a seat, bare chest pressed against the back of the chair as he positioned his back to the open air, it stung a lot and it hurt like hell when Yuu had ran a warm wet cloth by the edge of the cut, smearing off the crusted blood. He almost cursed the Akuma back from the dead if he hadn't bit the inside of his cheeks to tone down the pain.

"Need something to bite on?"

Rabi shook his head at the offer as he let out a quiet breath just when Kanda slowed down on the cleaning of his wound.

"Don't bite your tongue off."

He gave a nod and said in a teasing tone of voice, "yes, Yuu-chan." Kanda poured a generous amount of disinfectant on the red head's wounds as a reward for the name; Rabi let out a hiss at the burn and reminded himself never to flare off Yuu's temper especially when he was handling with a life, much less his own.

The red head in the chair couldn't take the burning silence, or the little knocks of the bottle of disinfectant with the floor. The quietness made his cut feel so much more vulnerable and he didn't like that. "Talk to me, Yuu."

And the reluctant words eventually crawled back to him from behind his back. "Were you hit in the head too?"

He couldn't help but smile at the reply and with a growing sleazy grin that the other could not see; the words had slipped past his lips. "No, I just want to keep my mind off the pain."

"Take a painkiller then." The Japanese stood up as though he was actually going to get Rabi a bottle of the little white pills that exorcists, like them, actually especially them, eat like candy.

"You are serious…?" The question came late as the red head held on to the corner of that white dress shirt, material weak between his loose grip. Kanda paused at the hold back and dropped his hands to the side. "Of course I am serious."

Rabi picked up Yuu's hand, fingers playing with the fingers as he ran a nail along the dips and curves of his palm. He couldn't help but let out a quiet laugh, not to tease the Japanese, but only to marvel at the straightforwardness that he so rarely showed off. The Bookman Junior looked up with a glance and a tug at his sleeve and Kanda would only gaze down with a sense of indifference at the pull.

"I was only joking, Yuu." The words left his lips in a voice barely louder than a whisper; the smile on top of the slight pain was visible. Green catching on to the light hue of blues, they were lost as to what the other thought. They weren't psychic after all and even if they were, the two of them were hardly the type to allow the other the satisfaction of knowing, let alone understanding.

Kanda was pulled down to his level and with the custom wink from Rabi; the red head had leaned in with a playful quirk of his head.

"Don't bite my tongue off."

000

I want to know you.

The pain was burning like liquid fire as it dribbled down my back.

But I want to know you.

Not the one who beats me with threats.
Not the one who thinks I am an idiot with the grin.
Nor the one who tries to help me with that cold and dry demeanor.

I want to know you.

You as in who you are, from every inch of your skin to every scar I carve. In your heart, on you body, I want to drink it all up. I want to know, a glimpse is fine, just enough to satisfy my curiosity. And as surprising as it sounded, this really was our first time, with each other at least.

And before I knew it, I was kissing Yuu, and you were kissing back.

000

He wounded an arm around Rabi's waist and upon touching something wet and sticky, he had remarked. "You are still bleeding, usagi."

"It will dry." The red head on the other hand didn't seem all that concerned as he gave a shrug. Kanda pulled back with a grimace as he caught sight of his bloody hand. "You are not a fucking towel."

He gave a sheepish grin before trying to peer over his shoulder to catch a glimpse of his back. "That is bloody."

By then, Kanda had already made a trip to and from the bathroom. And with a hint of a demanding tone to his voice, he said. "Turn around already." Rabi nodded with a sway of his heels, feeling faint with the loss of blood.

"Aye-aye, captain." He gave a weak salute before planting himself back into the chair, pouting at the cut to his short playtime.

With a fresh cloth and new gauze, Kanda finished cleaning the mess on the red head's back. And his hands now reeked of disinfectant and Rabi's coppery red. The thin grimace was evident on his face as he marched back into the bathroom, turning the tap to hot; he set his fingers beneath the stream of water, steadily heating up.

It never took long for the other to follow after; he leaned against the door behind the Japanese and watched with his signature grin. Kanda looked up at the mirror and they caught each other's eyes.

"I'm going downstairs."

"Why?" It was accompanied by a raise of a brow and Rabi noticed the smears of red on Kanda's once clean shirt, the red head almost felt guilty for getting another shirt so dirty. "We should make a call to Komui. You know, report back and thing."

Kanda nodded at his offer and turned the tap off. It was getting too hot anyways.

000

It never took much to stop you, just a shout or maybe even a whisper, sometimes just a murmur and you would have probably climb off of me and crawl back into your own bed with a sheepish smile on those lips. But I never did, just let those hands push me down, let those lips lay kisses on my mouth.

Once.
Once more.
Once again.

Hurry up already.

I gave a harsh tug on those red strands.

000

"You are so impatient." Those words had slipped from Rabi's lips before he was forcefully pulled down for another try at a mouth-to-mouth contact.

His lips kissed up his neck, then jaw. His fingers pulled at the button on those plain dress shirts stained with red that could've easily passed for black in the dark. The buttons popped off with a few more fumbling of the fingers. He brushed it aside, slipping the material off his shoulders. Rabi laid a hand on the black marking; it cut right across the pale skin and he peered up, green eye questioning. Kanda caught it; he only made a dry sound from the back of his throat, similar to a scoff.

"Don't ask and I won't ask about yours either."

"Mine's?"

He reached over; finger crooked as he hooked it underneath the strap of Rabi's eye patch. Kanda pulled back and let the black line snap into place. His other hand brushed along the edge of the gauze on the other's back.

"Yours."

Rabi gave a smirk, dropped the matter and turned back to the task at hand. Trailing a path down the dip in his spine, his fingertips felt the bump that outlined each section of the bone. He couldn't tear his eye away and Kanda let him be.

000

Our side or their side?

Was that a trick question? At the beginning I had thought it was a prank to confuse me, to stump me, to leave me wondering what else you had in that magician's hat of yours. But with each day passing and the same sentence composed of the exact words. I known you had only wanted me to know and I thought back, knowing I had known all this time.

But I didn't want to choose and I hadn't meant to fall.

I almost killed Rinali too.

When I work and work on no ends, it isn't Bookman's fault and I hope you won't blame him for my mistakes and slip-ups. I never wanted to work myself to death; I hadn't even planned for you to know about Junior. But somehow, in some strange Kanda way, you did.

"Ours or theirs?"

When you say ours, did it mean all those Finders and exorcists that Rabi found a place in? And how about you? Were you one for the 'ours'? I really couldn't be sure, especially not with those blue eyes staring expectantly at me. How about theirs, was it the Bookman Clan with all their Hidden History and ink pens? Junior rather enjoyed being with them, he liked the smell, the things that no one else knew about. He belongs there and I didn't have the heart to pry him away.

"You know I can't choose."

And I had wanted you to know that too even though you would have never cared.

000

Behind the lightening curtains he had heard a grind of metal, he brushed it off as nothing because the weight on his chest pulled his focus away, the red in those strands of hair held his blue eyes until the early scream interrupted his daze.

Rabi sat up in haste.

And they tumbled to the ground.

"Good morning. Sun. Shine."

The red head scrambled away from the threat sugar coated with words a lover would say and the white sheets almost tripped him back to the floor. And the two pulled on their tattered clothes, stiff with blood and dust before rushing out the door. The black and white of their uniforms were draped in a mess and they still smelled of each other and the sex that lingered on their skin. Rabi almost tripped on the stairs and dragged Kanda down but they held on at the last moment and straightened up before they both tumbled down.

The early morning sun blinded their eyes for just a second before a looming shadow was cast upon them.

The hammer was cutting across the air, slamming with full strength into the Akuma with the metal plates across its body. It sounded out like a temple bell, reverberating against their eardrums with a never-ending whine.

Another nearby building crumbled under the pressure as the large monster slammed into the walls with metal covered limb. Neither of them hoped to be responsible for the damage but the cost was the last thing in their heads as the canons narrowed in on their uniforms.

Kanda drew his blade along the metal armor, sparks danced at the contact metals made but he barely made a scratch. Conjuring up his first illusion he only gave the Akuma a few more slashes and a tumble into another misshapen building.

And then he was brushed off the side when a huge canon twisted out from its body, growing from metallic vines, knocking the wind out of his stomach as it slammed into Kanda with much more than the actual needed force.

000

The red of his hair contrasted deeply against the sky blue, he jumped and with the soles of his boots slipping on the metal plates, he swung Hi-ban right into the Akuma's head. His fingers burning with the tight hold he had around the handle, the knuckles beneath the black gloves a clammy white.

A snake of fire burst from beneath them, the heat was intense and it made his head swoon.

The Akuma batted at the snake of flames as if that was really all it took to distinguish it. His boots slipped and slid on the melting metal plates before he finally fell from the demon's head. He landed on the ground with a rupture of the cut on his back, he could feel the newly formed skin tearing once again and hell had it hurt. The sudden splitting pain had startled his concentration and the snake disappeared into ashes.

He stared straight at the Akuma's beady black eyes with no eye lids.

Rabi scrambled up with the last string of consciousness that wasn't connected to the pain.

"You fucking idiot!"

Kanda slammed his body out of the way, hips colliding with the other's pubic bone. Mugen positioned for the Akuma's head. Rabi was smashed to the side; he landed in a heap, next to the crumbled rocks, tangled with the handle of his hammer. And he watched with that green eye as the tip pierced through the half-melted metal armor, the blood that gushed out poured on to Kanda, and he seemed so much smaller in the waterfall of black poison that reeked of liquid copper.

Kanda gritted his teeth against the force and weight of the devil's machine. It's metal was the least of his problems when he felt the sole of his boots slowly sliding against the bloody ground. The lubricated sandy floor was weighing him down, dragging him away and the bones of his arms felt just about ready to snap into splinters of fibers.

And in the middle of watching the bath of blood, Rabi had screamed out, neither in fear nor worry.

"Yours!"

He gave a gasp that wasn't consumed by blood before he let out a breath, made up of a word. "What?!" He skidded across the sand, trailing a line of red as his palm smeared off the blood that did not belong to him. He stared at the Bookman Junior as he caught his breath, willing his heart to calm down from the adrenaline of the fight.

Rabi walked closer, picking his way through the crumbled building, hand rubbing at the bruise that would surely form over where Yuu had sharply collided into.

"I want to be with you."

"This is hardly the time to be romantic." He gave a gesture to his blood drenched clothes with a grimace to his lips and a stern stare in his eyes.

"Don't change the topic, Yuu." He pushed the bloody Japanese on to the ground with a rough shove at the exhausted bones holding up Kanda's body; he was still trying to straighten up from the battle before he fell to the rubbles again.

"That isn't a choice." He looked up at the red head, blues eyes just barely holding on to the interest between them, his fingers almost with enough strength to tear the red locks right out of Rabi's scalp. And Rabi's lips tore into a thin grin, too much to be a smile and too little to be a smirk, at that chaste reply.

"Too bad then."

He hovered above him, arms holding him in place as his red hair droop down, brushing along the Japanese's cheek despite the headband that was still being worn. Kanda stared up, cheeks lost of the blush that anyone should flood with when situated in such a compromising position. He opened his mouth, not with a moan or with a groan. He parted his lips, not asking for a kiss, not begging for a touch.

"Drop dead."

It fell between them and the red head soaked it all up without a care in the world.

"Gladly." Rabi gave a grin, a cheeky little grin as he pulled the next trick from the stolen magician's top hat. It was a surprise when he loosened the strain on his arms and collapsed over the other man's body, pinning the Japanese against the rubble and his body. Kanda's eyes widened a bit as Rabi successfully pulled a little gasp from between his lips.

The grin stretched bigger as he tilted his head to the side.

And their lips met with a push of the tongue and a pull at the hair.

Kanda doesn't feel the caress of the hand across his arm or the finger tracing his exposed navel, but he can taste. And everything tasted like Akuma blood and Rabi on his tongue.

They lapped up each other's wounds, licking the scars as if that is all it will take to make it all disappear. The intended cloud of dust starts up, the magician disappears and they were the only ones left. The Akuma was splattered dead, merely a few feet from where they lay, hands in each other's tangled hair and fingers feeling up each other's blood soaked flesh. Mugen fell from Kanda's hand and the hammer dropped to the ground. But everything seemed so insignificant when every sensation was pounding at the end of each nerve.

No trick, no illusion, nothing but everything that was laid out for the naked eye to see. (Though neither of them cared to take a glance.)

Everything seemed to be magnified by a hundred times. And all they could do was take it all in, from the blood of the devil to the rough tips of their fingers, violently pulling at the sticky buttons. They breathed through the stench and tried to ignore the pain with the help of the roughed up caresses laced with carelessness and a sort of demanding demeanor that they refuse to shake off.

"I want to be on your side." Rabi spoke between the gasps of blood and dust.

They knew where they stood in the grand scheme of things, they just hardly cared for what anyone else thought let alone what the other has to say.

"Do what you want." Kanda shrugged off the last strand of romance between them.

XXX Kuro

It ended up longer than I had expected but somehow I still can't feel totally satisfied about the overall. :P btw, I tried to do a lot of action writing, not the sex-type of action XDD but the fighting type because I feel that I always skip over fight scenes. D: Do tell me how I did?