Ch. 22 - POV: Mark

"But you can skyrocket away from me and never come back if you find another galaxy."
- Birds and Boats, Gregory and the Hawk

I rode my bike for hours. I didn't even notice the ache in my legs after a while. I didn't really notice anything, not the time, not the people I nearly knocked over as I whizzed by, not the fact that I hadn't eaten all day.

All I focused on was Roger.

I was terrified history was repeating itself. We had already been through this before, panicking and looking wildly for someone we loved.

I couldn't help but be angry at him. How could he – he of all people, who knew how hard this was – put us through this again? And why now? Now that we had so much else on our minds? Between Lily, Maureen and Benny, and the fact that the rent hadn't been paid in tow months, it was almost impossible to try and worry about something else.

And yet there I was.

Worried.

I checked everywhere. Everywhere.

I couldn't find him.

Tears I didn't want blurred my vision. I stopped by bike for the first time since I'd left the loft and propped it up against a brick wall. And for a while I waited there, hoping that this suffocating sadness would lift, would leave me alone.

It didn't.

I had a dark, terrifying feeling that it never would.

My pager beeped and my heart jumped. It was Roger – it had to be!

It wasn't. It was Collins.

I looked up at the sky; the sun was already setting. I knew I'd have to go home. I needed to see everyone, to hear what they knew. I needed to be near Lily again.

But I wouldn't be gone long. I swore then that I wouldn't stop looking until I found him. It didn't matter if I was angry with him or not – he was still my best friend.

And I couldn't loose him.