(I do not own Vampire Knight though I wish I did)
Through the Fog
Sequel to: The Problem with my Love
Some what OOC
POV: Yuuki/Zero/Kaname
(Forgive me since I like to change perspective. Bear with it!!)
This will be the last chapter and I'm sorry if this is short but there aren't many roads I would like to take and if I keep going, it will be worn out. This chapter is for anyone who thought Zero had become too much like Edward from Twilight even though I don't favor that book as much as I used to. You know who you are…
POV: Zero
(One Year Later)
I sat on the floor quietly, Yuuki still sleeping up stairs after the long move. Boxes were still packed and stacked in corners; we only had the basics out just yet. One mattress on the hardwood floor, some dishes, a rug or two… The fire place was lit, giving off a warming glow as I rubbed my legs and thought.
The news paper lay in front of me, front page silently mocking as his face stared up at me. It had been one year since the explosion, and our bodies still hadn't been found. Kaname was on the cover, the only person recovered from the scene.
Yuuki often asked me if I was afraid to die and I had yet to answer her. I thought about it for hours upon end whilst she slept. I didn't sleep often, knowing what I had done to this man in his last few days of life. I had stolen everything he wanted, everything he had worked so hard for… I had stolen Yuuki from him. But the worst part was that I was proud of myself for accomplishing that. I glanced back down at the paper, his stony face and realized we weren't so different…even the fact I was still alive physically. We were both dead emotionally. I crumpled the paper up and tossed it into the fire where it crackled and burned, his face disappearing in black smoke.
Was I afraid to die?
No.
With out an end, there is no game. With out being conscious of death you can't be fully conscious of the gift of life. Love is like death. You spend your entire life waiting for it, and it hits you at the last moment you expect it to. Sometimes you're grateful for it, when at other times you hate the fact that it involved itself in your life. At the same time I think this, I realize that nothing has change. Yuuki belongs to me now, and the work I suffered through to make that happen is over. I don't know where to go from here and my life has no purpose any more. She has not broken down barriers like she thinks she has, how I thought she could. The realization hits, and washes over me like a calming wave. I am no different.
Do you notice my eyes glaze over when we speak? I have no interest in anything you say but I let you talk in hopes that I won't have to do this again, later, when I'm tired and you won't let me sleep. When you notice my half lidded appearance, quit talking. That's a sign I don't want to hear what you have to say to me so dig around in that black phone of yours and find some one who gives a damn.
All I have in common with the uncontrollable and the insane, the vicious and the evil, all the mayhem I have caused and my utter indifference toward it, I have now surpassed. There are no more barriers to cross. My pain is constant and sharp now, and I do not hope for a better world for anyone. In fact, I want my pain to be inflicted on everyone. I want no one to escape.
There is an idea of "Zero", some kind of abstraction, but there is no real "Me". Only an entity, something illusory. And though I can hide my cold gaze, and you can shake my hand and feel flesh gripping yours and maybe you can even sense our life styles are probably comparable, I simply, am not, there.
I stood and walked slowly over to a box with a large X on it, that was my idea of labeling. From it comes a CD player and I plug it in to the white paste walls. The play button is pressed down and Beethoven's Moonlight Sonata Number 5 is spit from the speakers. Apparently it's so loud that neighbors can hear it, and there is a rapid thumping at the front door. I push my hair back and grab a heavy steel axe from the corner. "Coming," I yell out in an oddly pleasant voice. This visit will not be pleasant.
I raise the axe over one shoulder, and pull open the door where I am greeted by a tall man with dark hair and suspenders. "Keep that shit down." He spat at me and I pulled him in, bringing the axe down with a resounding THWACK as metal meets the skull. The door slams shut and blood pours from his wounds, sluicing over my bare feet.
Relief washes over me in an awesome wave. "Zero, what was that?" Yuuki's voice is muffled from sleep and my eyes dart up the stairs. I grimace and drop the axe, leaving my mess for later as I begin up the long, winding stair case.
I have all the characteristics of a human being: blood, flesh, skin, hair; but not a single, clear, identifiable emotion, except for greed and disgust. Something horrible is happening inside of me and I don't know why. My nightly bloodlust has over flown into my days. I feel lethal, on the verge of frenzy. I think my mask of sanity is about to slip.
"I'm coming," My own voice is steady and my feet are silent on the wood.
I find her at the stop of the stairs, only noticing the blood sprinkled heavily over my white shirt when she points it out. "Zero, what's wrong?"
"I need to engage in homicidal behavior on a massive scale can not be corrected but, I have no other way to fulfill my needs." She is stunned for a moment, and steps backwards towards the center of the room. "I think you should go." I stare Yuuki, her face is a mask of surprise. "I think if you stay, something bad will happen. I think I might hurt you. You don't want to get hurt, do you?"
She shakes her head, and gathers clothing to leave." No. No, I guess not. I don't want to get bruised." I'm alone now, except for the body down stairs that will wait for me for an indeterminable amount of time.
Even after admitting this there is no catharsis, my punishment continues to elude me and I gain no deeper knowledge of myself; no new knowledge can be extracted from my telling. This confession has meant nothing.
That's the end. Seriously. I had to bring Zero back to the cold, inhuman guy I've always seen him to be but yet he still cares enough about Yuuki to let her go with out harm. I know some of you may not like how this ended, but if I did it any other way I wouldn't have been able to finish this story. Remember, the only bad review is no review.