Never Was

Disclaimer: A bizarre idea that came to me shortly after I watched the new Transformers Animated episode on Saturday on March 13th. I'm not so sure if it is a... "realistic idea", to begin with, but I will make it as "real" as I possibly can. This idea was bugging me so much, I had to put it down. So if you feel this isn't the best, you can tell me. It won't hurt my feelings, honest. This fic takes place before the events of Animated. The song here at the end is Evanescence's "Imaginary".

"Deep into that darkness peering, long I stood there, wondering, fearing, doubting, dreaming dreams no mortal ever dared to dream before."
-Edgar Allan Poe

"The utmost extent of man's knowledge, is to know that he knows nothing."
-Joseph Addison

By: VampireQueenAkasha

"Your reasoning is highly illogical."

-Shockwave, G1 Episode

Chapter Seven: Never Was

Unknown Planet

The three had walked the remainder of the night, keeping their optics open in case something else would attack them. Shockwave had been silent the entire rest of the trip. He said and did nothing to indicate he was even focused on the two with him.

Hot Shot suddenly grinned and rushed up ahead. "Holy slag, it's here!" he cried. He glanced over his shoulder. "Yo, Decepticon! Get the lead out!"

Red Alert gave Shockwave a smile before she joined Hot Shot to the towering space bridge before them. It seemed to be in pretty good shape, despite the wearing away of the outer layer. Hot Shot began to inspect the main controls, brushing the vines off of them. He brightened.

"Red Alert, the coordinates for the last use are still programed!" he exclaimed, "We can get home!" He turned to her. "We just need enough juice for one trip."

The medic smiled and reached into her leg compartment, taking out a few small Energon sticks. It wasn't much, but just enough for them to get back home. She looked back and took notice of Shockwave simply standing there, further from them. She walked over, while Hot Shot began to power up the space bridge.

"Hey, thanks for saving me back there...again. This is a huge thing, you know; it's a clear sign of personal growth," she told him, "It's proof that underneath it all Decepticons aren't so bad to the spark. That despite those terrible things that you may have said to me back in town, you really do want to try to be friends with me. It's a miracle, actually."

Shockwave glanced down for a few moments before he shook his head. "I have spent too long with you, Autobot," he replied, sounding quite weary now, "And it has done something negative to my systems. Something I cannot explain."

Red Alert frowned. "Negative?"

Shockwave nodded once. "As clearly evidenced by my uncharacteristic behavior," he continued, "Risking my own life to save you, an Autobot."

Hot Shot joined Red Alert and shook his head. "Shockwave, what you did out there was a good thing," he pointed out.

Shockwave reached behind his back. "Being trapped here with you for so long, I have obviously become infected by your Autobot influence," he replied, "Therefor, I have but one alternate solution left."

Red Alert and Hot Shot jumped back at the sight of a peculiar, gem-like lens in his hand, one in which he fitted on his right arm cannon. Once he raised it at them, they jolted and Hot Shot raised his remaining torch at the Decepticon.

"So, what?" he snapped, "Are you gonna kill us for the sake of your pride?"

Shockwave shook his head. "No," he replied, "This is a device that I have often used to scramble digital mainframes. While it won't kill you, it will simply erase your memories of what transpired here these past few days."

Hot Shot scowled. "Come on!" he protested, "I thought you had changed."

Shockwave was silent for a brief moment. "This much is true. I have changed," he said, in a soft voice, "And now, I must pay the price."

Red Alert nodded her head once. "I understand." she said, quietly.

Hot Shot stared at her in protest. "What?" he cried, "You do?"

The space bridge flickered a few times before it crackled to life. The portal behind them roared into being, swirling with blue and yellow light. The Autobots glanced back at it in surprise and Shockwave nodded.

"You have no time." he told them.

Red Alert looked up at him with sadness. "Alright," she said. She began to walk toward him and he wavered somewhat.

"What are you..." he began. He trailed off as she inched up toward his cheek and planted a quick kiss there. The gesture confused him and he watched as she backed up a few paces, sadness in her optics. He held the cannon up to them.

"Farewell, Red Alert." he told her, before firing.

The blast jolted them roughly and sent their bodies flying through the space bridge. Finally, the space bridge crackled and dimmed out, leaving the Decepticon standing there, alone. He sighed heavily and reached toward a back panel in his arm. He typed in several coordinates for the Nemesis.

"Lord Megatron, Shockwave here..." he said, softly.

Cybertron

Hot Shot and Red Alert came tumbling through the space bridge nexus, flying right into Ultra Magnus and Perceptor.

"It's you!" Ultra Magnus gasped. He glanced over his shoulder. "All of you, get them to the medical bay at once!"

Autobots from all around them began to swarm around him, picking up the damaged Autobots and then rushing off to get them help. Perceptor helped Ultra Magnus to his feet and his gaze flickered toward the space bridge nexus.

"HOW WERE THEY ABLE TO RETURN?" he wondered. He walked toward the space bridge they had exited from and studied the coordinates sent. He grunted, surprised. The Decepticon had sent them back?

Perceptor looked up toward the bridge, confused. He glanced back toward Red Alert and Hot Shot as they disappeared around a corner.

What had happened?

One Millenia Later

Red Alert breathed heavily as she rushed toward Fortress Maximus. She was carrying documents in her arms and almost dropping them. No sooner had she raced around the next corner, she collided into a blue and white mech, causing her to drop her things.

"Oh slag, I'm sorry, I didn't see you there..." she muttered, sheepishly, "I'm just in a hurry and..."

She trailed off, frowning. The mech stood about a few feet taller than her and had peculiar treads on his arms and legs. His face...though...his face was strange. It seemed almost...false. Almost unreal. But nonetheless, she shook that off and bent to pick up her things. He bent down to help.

"It's alright," the mech replied, smiling, "I was on my way to the training grounds."

Red Alert tilted her head and smiled as well. She had heard of the new recruits who had arrived a few cycles ago. He must have been one of them. She was so busy, she wasn't sure she would meet any of them. "Oh! You must be one of the new recruits!" she said.

The mech stopped for a brief moment and nodded, chuckling. "Something like that, I suppose." He picked up some documents and handed them to her. "I am Long Arm, what's yours?"

Red Alert held the documents close to her. "Red Alert." She paused for a brief moment and studied him for a few moments, slightly confused and curious all at once. "Um, have we met somewhere before?"

Long Arm furrowed his brow. "I don't imagine so."

Red Alert smiled slightly, brow furrowed in concentration. "It's your voice," she replied, "It's just...familiar somehow."

Long Arm seemed to falter somewhat at that. He shook his head and smiled. "I...I am certain you must have me confused with another," he told her, "It is my first time here. There's also the possibility of several mechs carrying a similar voice frequency as mine."

Red Alert chuckled. "Yeah, I guess that might be it." She glanced over her shoulder, noticing Sentinel Major calling after her. "Oh, coming!" she called. She gave Long Arm a quick smile. "I have to go now. Maybe I'll see you later then."

LongArm watched her rush off for Fortress Maximus. He tilted his head, watching as she suddenly hesitated and looked back at him with a smile before disappearing from view. He blinked slightly at that before he began his trip toward the training grounds. But not before he made a little...detour.

He walked to a small, rundown building and slowly walked inside. There were a few mirrors hanging around the walls and canisters of oil and Energon sticks. Long Arm sat down into a chair and tilted his head back. His shadow seemed to bend and shift, elongating slightly. He was changing form. Changing into...

Shockwave.

He leaned his head back with a low sigh. His emotions. What he thought were emotions, were beginning to bother him. But he would live with the pain of them. That would be his punishment; to suffer the agony of feeling what he felt and not allowed to voice it.

"Red Alert..." he whispered.

The pain of knowing what never could be. The pain of feeling what never would be.

He would just go on living as if what was never was.

Ah, paper flowers
Ah, paper flowers

I linger in the doorway
Of alarm clocks screaming
Monsters calling my name
Let me stay
Where the wind will whisper to me
Where the raindrops, as they're falling tell a story

In my field of paper flowers
And candy clouds of lullaby (flowers)
I lie inside myself for hours
And watch my purple sky fly over me (flowers)

Don't say I'm out of touch
With this rampant chaos - your reality
I know well what lies beyond my sleeping refuge
The nightmare I built my own world to escape

In my field of paper flowers
And candy clouds of lullaby (flowers)
I lie inside myself for hours
And watch my purple sky fly over me (flowers)

Swallowed up in the sound of my screaming
Cannot cease for the fear of silent nights
Oh, how I long for the deep sleep dreaming
The goddess of imaginary light

In my field of paper flowers
And candy clouds of lullaby (flowers)
I lie inside myself for hours
And watch my purple sky fly over me (flowers)

(Ah, Paper flowers)
(Ah, paper flowers)

THE END