A/N: Hey you luckies! Two updates in one night! Happy early St. Patricks Day to you all! As usual, none of this belongs to me; it's all Richelle Mead's... Enjoy!
Damn it. I knew something was wrong from the moment she came running to practice, not three minutes after her other classes let out. Damn that… that Yeban'ko maloletnee! If I wasn't suppose to be a good role model for these kids… that Jesse Zeklos would be helping with my next demonstration.
Patrolling the grounds after our practice, I overheard what was bothering Rose so; what she tried so hard to keep from me. Some of the Moroi were snickering. As I approached, they stopped, whether in fear, or awe, I didn't know. I knew I was known as a badass around the campus, mainly because I was quiet and kept to myself. And my six moljina marks didn't diminish the stories that were spread. Doubling back, I heard whispers.
"Did you hear?"
"Yeah. I think that's disgusting!"
"I can't believe she did it."
"I didn't think she'd stoop that low!"
After a little more investigating, I understood what they were gossiping about. Jesse Zeklos and Ralf Sarcoszy had started spreading slanderous rumors about how she had sex with them, and how she let them drink her blood. Everyone was going around, calling Rose a bloodwhore. I knew it must have been killing her. She didn't want me to know, because she thought I'd be disappointed. If she actually thought I'd believe what I heard, she was wrong. I knew better. Yes, I knew that Rose had indeed given blood to Lissa while they had been on the run, but that was something totally different.
Lissa came up to me later that evening. "Guardian Belikov, sir, can you… is there any way I can…" she trailed off.
"Find a way to get you to Rose?" I supplied, finishing her sentence.
"Yes sir. I need to talk to her about…" Again, she couldn't finish her sentence. I knew this time it was because she didn't want to talk to anyone about the rumors floating around. I thought for a minute, and came up with a solution. Leading her around the back side of the Dhampir dorms, I showed her a small alcove to stand in.
"Stay here. I'll be back in a minute." I said, moving around to the front of the dorm. Putting on my official, serious face, I walked into the dorm.
"Guardian Belikov!" the dorm matron said, shocked. "What can I do for you?" she asked.
"I need to speak with Rosemarie." I said in a firm voice. It was sweet and simple. I could see it in her mind. She thought I was going to go and bitch out Rose for what she had supposedly done. I didn't bother to correct her, knowing it would lead to more questions than I had answers for.
"Go on up; you know her room number. Don't be too harsh, though. She's a good girl, deep down." She replied. Maybe she's not as big a белокурваas I thought. I started up the stairs leading to the third floor.
Nearing Rose's door, I heard sobs. Knowing Rose would never forgive herself if I walked in on her crying, I waited. The sobs slowly subsided, and I approached her door and knocked.
She opened it, her eyes red from crying. She looked at me uncomfortably. She was ashamed of what she knew I had heard. The look on her face was almost too much. My poor Roza. "Are you okay?" I asked gently. She needed to know I wasn't there to judge her, good or bad.
"It doesn't matter if I am, remember. Is Lissa okay? This'll be hard on her." She said, looking up at me. My mouth shot open. How could she be thinking of Lissa, now? She was in some of the most emotional pain a young female dhampir could go through, and she was worried about her best friend. Her magnanimity astounded me. Everyday I fell more in love with this girl.
Turning around, I led her out to a staircase that usually was locked, but was somehow open tonight… "Five minutes." I said, warning her that this wasn't an official visit. She walked out to where Lissa stood. I could hear the two of them talking. Not wanting to be eavesdropping, I let my mind wander. It went back to the night I ran into Rose and Zeklos.
One of the janitors had just walked into the Guardian building. "Sir, I just saw a male and female enter a lounge room alone in the Dhampir dorm building…" I looked around, deciding who should go on this call. "Sir, I believe one of them was Rosemarie." He said, continuing.
"Then it's yours." Alberta told me. We had an agreement to try and get Rose graduated. This would most certainly jeopardize that mission. We both knew that she wouldn't get away without punishment. In fact, my planned punishment was worse than the detention she'd be getting from someone else.
I quickly strode toward her dorm. I walked in, ignoring everyone. Doing a quick survey, I found the lounge they were in. I then heard the last thing I ever needed to hear coming out of Rose's mouth. "… I'm not like that. But if you want something to with your mouth, I can give you a few ideas…" Counting to five, I put on my 'Don't Fuck With Me' face and burst in the room. Faster than either of them could comprehend, I crossed the room and grabbed Jesse, pulling him so he was almost off the ground. I meant to scare him into never doing something like this again. Flashes of my childhood leapt forward, pulling up memories I didn't need to be remembering.
"What's your name." I asked, my tone cold. I saw Rose staring at me, completely forgetting she was topless.
"J-Jesse, sir. Jesse Zeklos, sir."
"Mr. Zeklos, do you have permission to be in this part of the dorm?"
"No sir." He replied, stuttering. It was the first time I had ever really heard him afraid.
"Do you know the rules about male and female interactions around here?" I asked at almost a whisper. Whispers were always more frightening. And that's what I needed to do. Scare him shitless.
"Yes sir."
"Then I suggest you get out of here as fast as you can before I turn you over to someone who will punish you accordingly. And if I ever see you like this again" pointing to Rose, "then I will be the one to punish you. And it will hurt. A lot. Do you understand?" My mission was accomplished. He would do anything I told him. Even now, I could tell he was about to wet himself.
"Yes sir." He answered. It appeared he thought respect was a good thing in this situation. He was right. Too often I had seen young Moroi men disrespect Dhampir women by taking advantage of them. That would not be this case, however.
"Then go." A simple command, taken to heart. After I released him, he was gone almost faster than I had walked through the door.
I turned towards Rose, disappointment written all over my face. She had let me down. I thought she was mature, but this situation put her back far. I could tell by her eyes that she was embarrassed, while my eyes told her to be ready for a long day tomorrow.
Suddenly it was like I was actually seeing her for the first time. All she had on was a black lacy bra and jeans. Being dhampir gave her the assets many girls at this school lacked. She had curves…
'SNAP OUT OF IT!' I screamed inside my head. She was Rose, my student, the person I was suppose to be bitching out. A flush appeared across her face, drawing my eyes gratefully to hers.
"See something you like?" she asked. Why she thought it was the right thing to say, I didn't know. Somehow, it made me even more angry.
"Get dressed." I stated, letting myself go on autopilot. It was my "badass" side that all of the novices loved to see on the training field, and the other guardians loved to see in the real world. It showed I meant business.
"How'd you find me?" she asked. "You following me to make sure I don't run away?"
"Be quiet." I snapped. She didn't need to dig herself deeper into the hole she was in. "Do you have any idea how stupid this was?" I asked, letting some of my fury seep into the comment.
"I know, I know. The whole probation thing, right?" she asked. Yes, that was part of it, but she still didn't understand the main thing I had a problem with.
"Not just that. I'm talking about the stupidity of getting in that kind of situation in the first place."
"I get into that type of situation all the time, Comrade. It's not a big deal." She replied, tone becoming chilly. Her embarrassment was turning into anger, which was a good thing. If she was angry, maybe she could see where I was coming from.
"Stop calling me that. You don't even know what you're talking about." I shot.
"Sure I do. I had to do a report on the R.S.S.R. last year." She replied. The sad thing was I didn't know if she meant to screw up the initials or not.
"U.S.S.R. And it is a big deal for a Moroi to be with a Dhampir girl. They like to brag."
"So?" she asked. I couldn't believe my ears. Could she really not see the problem?
"So? So don't you have any respect? Think about Lissa. You make yourself look cheap. You live up to what a lot of people already think about Dhampir girls, and it reflects back on her. And me." I said. Before I had a chance to say anything else, she interjected.
"Oh, I see. Is that what this is about? it Am I hurting your big, bad male pride? Are you afraid I'll ruin your reputation?" she asked. That angered me even more. I was already well known. She was the one who would suffer later.
"My reputation is already made, Rose. I set my standards and lived up to them long ago. What you do with yours remains to be seen." My tone had slipped from being strictly harsh to kind of pleading. I switched back. "Now get back to your room- if you can manage it without throwing yourself at someone else."
Her voice rose. "Is that your subtle way of calling me a slut?" she demanded. She was almost right. I had heard all of the stories about before she had left. How she would party every night she could; how she loved to get drunk.
The disappointment written clearly across my face, I said, "I hear the stories you guys tell. I've heard stories about you."
I could see she was biting back a retort. She desperately wanted to say something to me, but held it in. I saw her face contort with rage, then slide into something more melancholy.
"Why is it wrong to… I don't know, have fun?" she cried. Her voice cracked, and I knew she was on the verge of tears. "I'm seventeen, you know. I should be able to enjoy it."
She was now experiencing what most Dhampirs went through close to graduation. The realization that their life was effectively over.
"You're seventeen, and in less than a year, someone's life and death will be in your hands. If you were a Moroi or human girl, you could have fun. You could do things other girls could." My voice was still firm, but had lost it's harshness. We had moved away from tonight to something that had been bothering her for a while.
"But you're saying I can't." she said like a statement, not a question.
My mind wandered back to when I had been her age. I was wavering back and forth, trying to make up my mind whether to tell her about my own experiences. It was what made me such a devoted guardian; a story every other guardian knew about, but few students knew.
"When I was seventeen, I met Ivan Zeklos. We weren't like you and Lissa, but we became friends, and he requested me as his guardian when I graduated. I was the top student in my class. I paid attention to everything in my classes, but in the end, it wasn't enough. That's how it is in this life. One slip, one distraction…" I trailed off, the thoughts becoming too much. I sighed. "and it's too late."
The silence in the room became heavy as she processed what I had just told her. "Jesse's a Zeklos." She said, startling me.
This was one place I didn't want to go. "I know."
"Does it bother you? Does he remind you of Ivan?" she continued, oblivious to my discomfort.
"It doesn't matter how I feel. It doesn't matter how any of us feel." I replied. She needed to leave this wound alone, before she saw how deep it truly was.
"But it does bother you. You hurt. Every day. Don't you? You miss him." She said plainly. I saw the realization spread across her face, all I tried to keep hidden laid out at her feet. I had to regain control of the situation. I stuffed all of my feelings behind the barrier in my heart.
"It doesn't matter how I feel. They come first. Protecting them."
"Yeah. They do." She said thoughtfully.
Silence fell, not as awkward as the ones previously. "You told me you want to fight, really fight. Is that still true?" I asked. She needed to be dedicated 100% to training.
"Yes. Absolutely." She answered immediately.
"Rose, I can teach you, but I have to believe you're dedicated. Really dedicated. I can't have you distracted by things like this." I said waving to the room. "Can I trust you?"
She looked ready to cry again. "Yes, I promise." She managed to get out, thickly.
"All right. I'll teach you. But I need you strong. I know you hate the running, but it really is necessary. You have no idea what Strigoi are like. The school tries to prepare you, but until you've seen how strong they are and how fast… well you can't even imagine. So I can't stop the running and the conditioning. If you want to learn more about fighting, we need to add more trainings. It'll take up more of your time. You won't have much left for your homework or anything else. You'll be tired. A lot."
She thought. "It doesn't matter." She said. "If you tell me to do it, I'll do it." I looked at her with a penetrating stare, trying to decide if I had made the right choice in agreeing to work with her. Finally I decided that what was done was done, and gave her a nod.
"We'll start tomorrow."
Suddenly, I was acutely aware of how much time had gone by. I stuck my head out the doorway, saying "You've got to get back inside, Rose, before someone finds you." the last thing she needed was more trouble. I was already prepared to take the blame, should someone stumble upon this impromptu gathering.
I walked her back up to her room, so she'd have an excuse if she was seen. At her door, I gave her a quick hug, which surprised her almost as much as it did me. She needed to know that someone cared.
"Chin up." I told her, turning to head downstairs. I heard her door close, and headed towards the gym, to beat something I could actually destroy.