AN: Life is punching me in the effing face right now.

I was going to make this longer, but I didn't want to exhaust all of my ideas in one chapter. Also, Kid seems like a cat person to me.

No matter how horrible their situation got, Soul was determined to keep it cool. In the face of death, he was cool, and in a simple, everyday situation, he was cool. Cool was his method of operation: He ate cool, he breathed cool, he thrived on cool, he lived cool. Without his coolness, he had nothing to his name, no reason to get up in the morning or go to bed at night. Granted, that was a massive exaggeration, but the high value in which he held his reputation was obvious to everyone that knew him; to be Soul was to be cool. Unfortunately, the level of respect he had for himself and his partner just made the entire situation worse as the words nobody is ever willing to hear out tore unbidden and awkward from his lips.

"Uh, I can explain," he offered feebly, defensively showing their audience his palms, as if they expected him to be armed. Beside him, Maka slapped her forehead and uttered a grouchy "yeesh."

"Of course you can," Liz said, and Patty bared her teeth in a terrifying grin of triumph. "And, believe me, we want to hear all of it. Every last detail."

Soul felt the situation slip out of his grasp a little bit more with every failed attempt he made.

"It's a long story," he offered feebly, his heart beating faster in desperation. He slid his hands into his pockets and shrugged his shoulders bleakly, as if the gesture of carelessness would free him of his burdens. "It's kind of lame, too. Not cool at all."

Maka was putting as much distance between Soul and herself as Black Star would allow with a peculiar look of helplessness on her face. Maybe she was wondering if staying apart now could undo all of the mistakes they'd made; maybe she thought that distance would heal their damaged social lives, make their friends change their minds. Although it was an action that seemed logical enough given their current situation, Soul's feelings - and ego - sustained massive damage, and he almost gave up on the whole shebang right then and there. But that wasn't cool, was it?

"It would, uh...Probably bore you guys, I mean," he said, shooting a glance over his shoulder. The hallway beckoned to him and appealed to his thirst for freedom like a glorious oasis in the midst of an ocean of sand, singing songs of liberation and heaven into his ear. Black Star's fingers tightened on his shoulder instantly - he was probably used to figuring out when his prey was considering the ever-present option of trying to run away - and the enticing scent of effortless escape dissipated, grinding Soul's hope into the floorboards under the foot of disappointment.

"I think you'll keep us entertained," Liz said, smirking like the cat to the rat. Patty slammed her fists down on the couch again, this time to a more erratic beat, and the springs within squeaked and groaned in protest. Her invitations tended to lack the 'inviting' part. "You guys probably have a pretty good story to tell," Liz continued over the ruckus of her sister, clenching her thighs awkwardly together to keep her bowl of noodles from falling in the tremors caused by the ceaseless cushion-beating. "Feel free to embellish it as much as you want, if you think you'll bore us."

Frustrated and defeated, Soul rolled his shoulder violently. Black Star released him with a grin that reminded him of that damn pink cat from Alice in Wonderland, cackling like this was a game to him - and it probably was, the careless bastard. That whole thing about thinking you know a guy? Soul thought within the privacy of his mind, giving Black Star an angry look to communicate his feelings. Yeah, it's true; you think you know a guy and then you gotta get someone to take the knife out of your spine. Not cool. He wanted so badly to voice his thoughts in detail, but he refrained from it, instead gritting his teeth to keep down the fury.

"Judas," he snapped to the assassin as he made his way over to the couch and sat heavily, summarizing his bitter contemplations in a single word. Black Star didn't seem to get it, because his laughter paused and a puzzled look glazed over the expression of sweet victory as he tried to make sense of the statement.

Soul leaned back into the cushions and pretended not to be miserable for the sake of his image, but he couldn't help but notice the way Maka paused beside Tsubaki as she followed him to the seats beside Patty. She fixed the demon blade with a heart-rending look of betrayal, a baby deer regarding the ruthless hunter with its final breaths, with her bottom lip stuck out in a doleful and hurt pout. Tsubaki looked towards her cornered ally and dropped her eyes down to her shoes the moment they sustained a second of eye contact, guilt written across every square inch of her face as she began to squirm where she sat. It was obvious to Soul that she wanted to be here about as badly as they did, and he found himself hoping that Maka wouldn't stubbornly hold this whole ordeal over Tsubaki's head as she planned to do with him. Again, he wouldn't put it past her.

"So, when did you two start this masquerade?" Liz asked the moment Maka's butt touched the cushions, finally going in for the kill. Patty leaned over and began deftly stealing food from her sister's bowl, shoveling down the sustenance without pausing to breathe.

"A few weeks," Maka replied, surprisingly willing to cooperate. It wasn't if they had a choice, but Soul would have expected a bit of a fight from her; flying claws and gnashing teeth at the very least.

"Interesting," Liz replied, laying her fingers across her chin in thought and stroking an invisible beard. Patty laughed at her sister's ridiculous impersonation between gulps of noodles, consequently spraying broth and bits of her lunch all over their beloved furniture.

Disgusted by the less-than-desirable eating habits of the giddy gun, Soul averted his eyes, instead watching Tsubaki flinch as Black Star plunked himself down on her lap without warning - certainly the boy was heavier than he looked, being comprised of nothing but muscle and his infinitely large ego. He made a sour face at the assassin, who grinned cheekily back at him. Feeling quite ruffled, the scythe glanced over at Kid and saw that, unsurprisingly, he wasn't paying attention at all; instead he was scratching Blair under the chin with a serene smirk.

"Blair loves the little Shinigami," the cat purred, rubbing her head against his knuckles and nudging the now empty bowl off of his legs so that she could have more room to sit. He chuckled and stroked her ears, smoothing out the fur so that it all went in the same direction.

Gee, at least some people were enjoying themselves. It brought Soul's blood to a boil.

"We didn't want to get you guys involved," Maka added, glaring at a stray noodle that had somehow landed on the floor at her feet. "We figured... Well, we figured you'd do something like this."

"Something like what?" Liz asked, quickly tiring of her sister invading her personal space in order to steal her lunch and surrendering the meal entirely. Patty dipped her face into the bowl like a pig at the trough the moment it was safely balanced within her palms, causing the surrounding people to flinch in disgust for a beat. "We're only trying to help, you know," the eldest of the guns continued, lunging in order to wipe Patty's face off with a napkin once the opportunity arose. "You haven't even given us a chance yet!"

"... Help?" Maka parroted, more out of outright disbelief than cold-hearted skepticism. "How are you guys helping?"

"We've helped in more ways than you realize," Tsubaki said quietly, offering Maka a timid smile. "After you left the classroom we--"

"We knew you guys were worried about Maka's papa," Liz interrupted, talking over Tsubaki unabashedly, "so we decided to ask the class not to tell anyone until you guys figured things out. Just a favor for our buddies, it's no biggie."

Soul felt his jaw drop, and Maka mirrored his expression instantly. The pair gaped at their fellow students in stunned silence. The quiet was so immense and heavy that Soul could hear someone battling with a door and swearing all the way down the hall.

And then Patty belched, shattering the buzz of noiselessness.

"You can thank us later," Liz said in a sing-song tone once the room had revived, clearly proud of herself. She leaned back against the couch with her arms folded behind her head, a cocky grin spread across her face. Tsubaki smiled at them, sheepish, as Patty laughed hoarsely and dropped her bowl on the floor with a distracting clatter, freeing her hands for childish clapping. Blair leapt from Kid's lap to eat the noodle that had previously landed by Maka's feet, and Kid rose to place his bowl and the bowl shared by his weapons in the sink, perturbed by the mess they had left and unfazed by the other goings-on entirely. Black Star beamed at Soul from Tsubaki's lap, stretching a leg out to scratch Blair's back with the bottom of his foot.

Life was still going on while Soul and Maka felt everything come to a screeching halt - only this time they were reveling in a moment of sheer glory.

Soul's mind was floating in the clouds of momentary peace, his spirit soaring above all the problems of teenage life as he belatedly realized that the friends they hadn't trusted, the friends they had run from, had saved them. They were safe; so long as the other kids in their class kept their stupid traps shut - which they probably would, seeing as the threat of Black Star loomed dangerously overhead - they were safe. No one would tell Maka's perverted old man. No one would spread rumors. For the time being, they had a blanket of protection.

It was glorious.

And then he realized that Liz was laughing.

"Of course, you two owe us now," Liz said with a wicked grin. "If you don't want us to tell her dad ourselves, that is."

Patty cackled, Tsubaki frowned, Black Star leaned towards them and sneered, Kid peeked out at them from the kitchen with his eyebrows raised, and the wonderful spotlight that had bathed Soul in hope shut off with a click.

Again.