Ah, dear customers! Reference to a certain guest might come across better if you've seen what she has done to aid me in my other project. However, sorry it took me so long. - Kyoya.

"Well, well…" Kyoya smiled cryptically at the other six horrified Hosts, as he turned the pages in his notebook "here goes some more…"

"You… you mean there are even more types of those Sues?" asked Tamaki, holding Kuma-chan tightly.

"Oh, I'm sure of that" Kyoya's glasses flashed "but that's not the subject today. Some customers heard about my research and wanted to know how not to write a Sue. You see, I often gave advice, but I suppose there's need for more clarification. So, there are several ways...

New customers or random girls who eventually end up paired with one of us may automatically classify as Sues. But not all of them are actually Sues. Why not? Or, if they are Sues, why are they popular? Let me explain, but not in the way I did in my other notes. There's three categories: the Non-Sue, the Epic Fail Non-Sue, and the Sue in Disguise. And, as a fun addition, the Plot Bunny Sue in Disguise.

Some of my additional comments will be in italics, as usual.

- Kyoya

Non-Sue

Very hard to write. There's lots of pitfalls.

Pitfall #1: OMG SHE HAS TO BE SPECIAL! (Lone warrior? BEEP! Samurai Sue alert. Fish tail? BEEP! Supernatural Sue alert. Named Dawnbringer Moonbeam LaLaLa Magic Seawaves? BEEP! Do I have to tell you? Tragic past? BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! General Sue alert.)

How to avoid: Okay, we might not fall in love with some girl who can as well be a wallpaper as any other customer. But no need to throw all your OMG SPESHUL QUALITIES 111! at us right away. Be subtle.

Addition: By "subtle" I did not mean that it's OMG Mystery (BEEP! Cliffhanger Mystery Sue alert) until we suddenly find out you're Haruhi's missing twin. However, there is one scenario which can play out well in the end, given that you know what to write in the middle, of course. That's Fiancée Sue. Turning out the thing near the end (not at the end) is a struggle to make, but can work well. Unless you add too much other Sue-esque flavors.

Pitfall #2: OMG SHE NEEDS PERSONALITY! (That's true. She's angry? BEEP! Attitude Sue alert. She cries a lot? BEEP! Angsty Sue alert.)

How to avoid: Personality =/= Overused Plot Cliché. Learn the subtle distinction.

Addition: Also, no Great Personality Description Scenes, for the love of all!

Pitfall #3: OMG WE NEED A STORY! (…okay…)

How to avoid: This is your choice. And again, be careful about Overused Plot Clichés.

Pitfall #4: OMG WHAT NOW?

How to avoid: Have at least a brief synopsis in mind. And don't drag it on for more than 25 chapters. (BEEP! Endless Sue alert.)

Epic Fail Non-Sue

THE Pitfall: You've avoided all pitfalls? Hooray! But then you may have fallen into the biggest one.

Once you've avoided Pitfalls #1 and #2: …she became totally dull. May qualify for Dull Non-Sue Sue, if anything.

Once you've avoided Pitfall #3: ...severe cases of Completely Unbelievable Scenarios (like, an UFO crashing into the school during the opening hours of the Host Club) are not Overused Plot Clichés, but can be much, much worse. Unless it's AU, of course, but I'll cover that in my other project.

Once you've avoided Pitfall #4: …and the three others up here, that might be the case of an avoided Sue.

Sue in Disguise

How? It's very easy to write one. Just throw a random girl into Ouran for no damn good reason and turn her into an Endless Sue. Endless Sues are amazing masters of disguise.

Are there other ways? But of course. If you add information about her slowly, and maybe keep some to yourself (like, no need to tell everyone that she already had a zillion boyfriends or that she has won a math contest if the fact has no relevance whatsoever to the story)… now, that can be good. But be careful! By "slowly" I don't mean discovering something OMG SPESHUL in each single chapter. (BEEP! Plot Bunny Sue Alert.)

The Hosts didn't interrupt Kyoya so far. They looked deep in thought.

"Is there a chance of such customers showing up?" asked Kaoru after a while.

"Very, very slight" sighed Kyoya "but the chance is there, in every customer entering…"

The clock struck 3, and the first customers arrived.

"Kyoya!" said Haruhi, once they were already packing, as Club was over "you forgot to tell us about…"

"I know, the Plot Bunny Sue in Disguise."

"But…"

"Sit down, and listen" everyone complied as Kyoya opened his notebook again "remember the girl who entered after we've finished with the seventh part of my notes, and was here today as well?"

Plot Bunny Sue in Disguise

How does that even exist? Very strangely, a Plot Bunny Sue in Disguise generally classifies as an avoided Mary Sue.

But how? She has some special qualities, but none of them is worked upon so goddamn hard that she ends up overly clichéd or concentrated on only one thing, like, say, she's a famous singer (BEEP! Talented Sue alert). So she's not dull, but not overburdened with OMG AMAZINGNESS. Like, remember that girl, Aki Kamimae a.k.a. Rich Bitch Sue? Well, her name means "on the front and in the middle", and Aki means "autumn", and she cannot go anywhere unnoticed, plus is bossy (and she has helped me, Kyoya, a lot with my other project, too). But do we elaborate upon her name? No! Do we stare at her in awe, explaining over and over why are we doing so? No! Do we complain about her attitude? No! Is she a main character described in minute detail? No! Will she end up in love with her host of choice, or the first one she sees? No! Plus, she's one of the less irritating Sue-types, one of the few which can be written well.

Huge pitfall: The border between Disguised Plot Bunny and Plot Bunny is very, very easy to cross accidentally. Also, there is great danger of Endless Sue.

"So, seems like we're done" as Kyoya closed his notebook, no one looked too stressed "but wait, let me see… it seems like there are cases when the target is not one of us Hosts! Should I do some research on that subject too?"