This takes place in the midst of Pain's invasion. What happens one day as Sakura goes out in the rain. Not fluffy; actually, a little dark, if you think about it.
Sakura's face was upturned when the dark, foreboding storm clouds rolled over Konoha. She had always loved the rain. But not this rain. Because now, when it began to rain, she knew the heavens were crying. They were crying because the worst had not even come, because the cause of Konoha's devastation was not even close to being defeated, and because of all the souls that had been lost.
She still loved the feeling the rain gave her, though, if not the rain itself. Sakura could stay out in it forever. She loved that she could hide for a little while, in the endless raindrops. She could cry and no one would know. It washed away her sins, her tears, her blood. It encased her and consumed her. A small, almost unnoticeable drop landed on her cheek as she stared at the sky, rolling down her face in a painfully slow manner. She took a deep, shuddering breath.
Sakura hadn't let herself cry in a long time. She felt guilty, because she knew she didn't have the damn right to cry. She had used up all of her tears on stupid, worthless things when she was younger.
Sakura had seen the gray clouds in the distance earlier that day, and left the rubble of Konoha early, into the forest. She had stood there for… well, she didn't know how long. But she had been standing there waiting for the rain. Oh how she longed for it.
She had known that even if it didn't rain, it would give her a reason to find a sweet escape; an escape from the grim faces and the corpses. For the first time, Sakura was afraid to go to the hospital to help those who needed her… She was terrified of who she would find among the dead.
The rain steadily became heavier, soaking through her clothes completely, making the drenched fabric cling to her body. Strands of her hair stuck to her face. Still looking upwards, she let herself cry. Salty tears blended with the rain on her face, though she did not cry heavily. She did not make any noise. However, she let the tears fall.
She let them fall for Kakashi-sensei, whose life was taken away by Pain. Kakashi-sensei who had fought bravely, who had taught her, helped her, given her hope.
She let them fall for Shizune, who had been like her sister, whose soul had been ripped from her body.
She let them fall for Kurenai-sensei, who was pregnant and alone without Asuma. Both Kurenai and Asuma had suffered because of Pain.
She let them fall for Hinata, the shy, sweet girl who had died before her life could truly start.
She let them fall for Naruto, who she felt she would not be able to help. Naruto, whose life meant the survival of the world.
Sakura felt guilty that she cried for Sasuke, who she would not be able to save from himself.
She let the tears pour for a long time, the rain only becoming heavier. The water numbed her every physical feeling, and she let herself drown in the rain. Thunder rumbled, and she closed her eyes, looking down once more. If she hadn't become so unfeeling, her neck would have ached. The tears had stopped, or so she thought. She could not completely tell.
Thunder crashed, a strip of lightning flashing against the sky, causing her face to rapidly light up and then darken once more. So suddenly, so unexpectedly, Sakura sensed a presence nearby. However, she did not react as she should have, as a ninja would have. She opened her eyes slowly, her sorrow filled glance aimed downwards.
"You still like the rain."
Sakura knew that voice.
"Hello, Sasuke-kun," she replied, her voice barely above a whisper. Now that he was close, he allowed himself to be heard. The leaves beneath his feet crunched as he approached her from behind.
"Are you going to kill me?" she asked, looking up at the sky again, feeling each individual rain drop as it ran down her face. Sakura's voice was frightening and bizarre. She said it in an inquisitive, uncaring, and most frightening of all, indifferent tone.
"Not today." That was strange; she did not detect any smugness in his voice. Sakura nodded in response. Her finger stroked the kunai ready at her hip. "Are you going to try to kill me?" Ah. He was still egotistical. Sakura had not missed the word 'try'.
"I think you know the answer to that question, Sasuke-kun," she replied wearily. Sakura finally turned around, her gaze meeting his. Her eyes were soft, saddened, but not frightened or innocent. They were worn.
"You've changed," he stated. It was simply a fact, nothing more.
Sakura nodded, "So have you." She did not pay attention to his increase in height, the more defined muscle, or the fact that his chakra signature was seeping with power. She paid attention to his eyes. And what she saw surprised her.
In Sasuke's eyes she saw hardship. She detected the smallest amount of sadness, a larger amount of weariness, though mostly coldness. Seeing what he had done to himself was depressing.
"Are you going to ask me to come back?" he questioned in a cool tone, as if he was expecting she would.
Sakura shook her head and smiled sadly. "No. It's too late for you." Was that shock she saw on his face for a split second? No, it could not have been. Uchihas did not do shock. And oh so quietly, "I cannot save someone who does not want to be saved."
"You understand," he remarked, a slight tone of surprise, some detectable uncertainty. She nodded, the tears overflowing from her eyes again. Sakura looked up at the rain. Even if Sasuke's mission had been complete at this moment, Konoha would never accept him back. He did not deserve to be accepted back, and she knew it. His actions were the cause for so many deaths, so much suffering. He was selfish. She was guilt ridden.
"You look guilty."
"I feel guilty," she responded simply. Sakura knew that if they were young again, and everything was as simple as her words were, he would have rolled his eyes.
"Why?"
"Because I would still take you back."
"I know."
"I hate myself for it."
"I know that, too."
And it was then that Sakura knew that Sasuke knew that she understood him and his actions completely. His unforgivable, horrible actions. But she still forgave him, and she wished she didn't. "I want to hate you," she said with a sigh.
"I want you to hate me, too."
Sakura's gaze immediately went to his face. What did he mean by that? Damn, what did this boy ever mean? She understood everything he did accept for the things he said to her.
"Would you kill me if you had the chance?" he asked out of simple curiosity. And when she looked at him this time, she took in his whole image. Soaking wet Sasuke, his hair clinging to his skin as hers did. Sasuke, would had been hardened by years of hate and pain.
"I don't know," she said simply. Sakura walked forward until they were only a few inches apart, looking for something in his face. He was patient. Sakura placed one of her small, cold hands on his face, and dropped it after a brief moment. She shifted her eyes downwards, to the leafy forest floor. Sakura counted the beats of the raindrops.
She felt a hand on hers and looked down at it curiously, then looked up at Sasuke as if to say, 'What the hell are you doing?' Sasuke moved her hand using his own, placing it on her kunai. She grasped it gently, and he brought her hand and the kunai up to his throat.
"Can you kill me?" he asked, pressing the cold edge of the weapon to his throat. He dropped his own hand, leaving hers there, still with the weapon against his skin. Her hand trembled. Sakura gripped the end of the kunai hard enough that it hurt, and then dropped it, letting it fall to the forest floor. A strangled sort of sob escaped her lips, and a few more tears might have escaped her eyes. "No. I can't."
Reviews loved. :) I have muffins.
~Sak