May 2007

"Hey Bill," Barney said, rocking back in his chair and draining his champagne. The bar was practically deserted as most of the wedding party were dancing or drinking in the main hall.

"Hey Barney," Scooter replied, looking rather forlornly into his drink.

Barney frowned. In a situation where a Bro is confronted by another Bro, who is wearing neither shirt nor pants at his ex-girlfriend's wedding, what would be the Bro-tocol?

"I bet you're wondering what happened?" Scooter said, the corner of his lips turning was a red mark on his cheek which looked painful. It was starting to swell and darken into a bruise.

Barney shrugged. "Well, last I saw you, Brad was chasing you out of the wedding. You know, after you tried to stop it and everything."

"Yeah." Scooter answered.

Barney felt he had to say something. "Dude. Totally not cool."

"I know…" Scooter dropped his glass on to the floor where it fell without breaking and started to roll away. He stared at his hands, confused, before continuing, slurring his words. "I just loved her, so much. Lily, I mean." He began to shiver.

Barney rolled his eyes. "You wanna put some clothes on? I mean, not that I would. Being semi-naked and helpless leads to serious bridesmaid action." He wiggled his eyebrows.

Scooter laughed. "You don't look like you're getting much action yourself."

"By choice, man, by choice." Barney tapped his finger thoughtfully against his glass. After a while he said. "Hey, I can probably find you some clothes if you want?"

"Wow, that would be great." Scooter looked momentarily suspicious."How?"

"I have a super-power…"

*--*--*

Barney had to help Scooter up to Ted's room (not his room, there was no way he'd let another Dude wear his clothes. Ever.) having got a spare key from reception by insisting it was "for the bride" (that never got old).

He shoved Scooter towards Ted's open suitcase while he raided the mini-bar fridge. "What do you want, Bill? Vodka? I wouldn't recommend the crappy scotch they've got here…"

"Vodka…" Scooter was attempting to get Ted's jeans out of the case but only managed to completely unbalance himself, falling, sprawling, across the bed.

Barney sighed, massaging his temples before making his way to the bed. "Perhaps you've had enough," He said, thinking that Scooter had passed out. He leaned over, only to see Scooter's eyes snap open as he reached towards him, grabbing his tie and yanking him down towards him for a kiss.

It was unexpected, clumsy, warm, hard and very, very….

Barney tried to pull away but Scooter's hand snaked around the back of his head, fingers raking through his hair as he managed to sneak in some tongue. Barney let out a squeak of protest, trying to dislodge Scooter, to get out of his embrace…

(admittedly, he didn't try very hard. Scooter was a surprisingly good drunken kisser)

When Scooter broke the kiss, he took advantage of Barney's shock and confusion to roll him over on to his back.

Barney was pretty sure that the Bro Code didn't cover this situation.

He hastily tried to come up with a new article on the spot but was distracted by Scooter's tongue in his mouth (again) and his hands on his fly (that was new) and the fact that this was really, really wrong…

But… he had a great champagne buzz going on and he was just really horny and suddenly he was kissing Scooter back just as hard, feeling the other man's stubble scrape across his chin, their teeth clashing as Barney shifted his hips and (oh crap!) he could feel Scooter's stiff dick digging into his thigh.

So… one of two things could happen.

Plan A: He throws Scooter off, punches him out and leaves.

Plan B: Hmmm…

He went with Plan B. After all, Scotter has already been punched once already that night and Barney wasn't the kind of guy to throw away the offer of sex. Even with a dude. Even with a dude who was in love with one of his best friends and had almost ruined her wedding.

Even a dude who (he was pretty sure) had never done this before with another dude.

Okay, so his reasoning was a little flawed but he gave himself a break. It had been a long and overly emotional day. And if they were going to do this, Scooter had to be kidding if he thought he was going to get everything his own way.

Barney growled and shifted his weight, rolling the both of them over until he was back on top. He grinned at Scooter's look of child-like surprise but took his bottom lip into his mouth, sucking it sensuously before kissing him again.

This wouldn't be the first time he'd took advantage of a broken heart…

Usually she'd be drunk, blonde and with the biggest boobs humanly possible.

One out of three was do-able. Scooter wasn't a chick or blonde but he was a really good-looking guy. Objecitvely speaking... Dark hair, dark eyes, cute smile...

Barney lifted his hips, pulling down his pants and kicking them off. Okay, so it was fairly kinky to feel Scooter's penis pressing insistently against his - warm skin, a kind of deep, throbbing heartbeat... Nice…And, yep, it wasn't like he'd never done this before.

Barney grinned, reaching down between them, fisting Scooter's dick, moving his hand over it, building up a rhythm, squeezing…

Scooter groped blindly for Barney's own cock, jerking it painfully at first, but then settling in, teasing him with an erratic rhythm. Barney grinned, looking straight into Scooter's eyes, un-blinking, watching as they widened slightly when he moved his fist faster, loving the way his eyelids fluttered when he was on the edge. It was easy to keep Scooter on the edge - the guy had so much alcohol in his system. Barney kissed him, very lightly, on the lips, and Scooter cried out, frowning, his own hand now jerking insistently, faster, faster, and Barney couldn't hang on, damn him… He grit his teeth, trying, trying, his own fist a blur now and Scooter's whole body spasmed, his back arching as his cock erupted in Barney's hand even as Barney's eyes rolled back in his head, his own orgasm sweeping through him.

When the world came back into focus, Barney lowered himself back on to the bed beside Scooter, whose eyes were already drooping closed.

"We should really get out of here…" Barney said, yawning.

"Cold…" Scooter replied. He looked adorable.

Adorable? Where did that come from?

Barney shook his head, reaching down and pulled the blanket over the both of them and lay back down beside Scooter. He really needed to get up… Um… he couldn't remember why exactly… It was really warm and he was very tired and…

And…

Mmmm…

*--*--*

There was a scream. A girl's scream.

"Oh my GOD, Barney!" Ted yelled.

Barney flailed sleepily at the covers, covering his eyes from the stupidly bright light. There was a naked shoulder in bed with him… A naked… and Ted… Ted was standing… somewhere, screamingly like a girl!

"Huh?" He managed.

"Barney, did you have sex with a bridesmaid in my BED?" Ted yelled.

Barney lifted the cover and peeked underneath it. Oh. Crap.

"Uh…" He said.

"Barney, get out of my room right now."

Barney managed to blink himself awake and groped beside the bed for his pants. "Ted…" He said. "Ted…" Waving his hands at his best friend. "All the rooms are the same." He threw his keycard at the other man. "Just go use mine. Sleep. Leave here. Stop SHOUTING!" He fell back on to the bed, exhausted by the exchange.

"Barney, I'm going to kill-"

"Ted, please! Keep it down, Bro. Some people in this hotel are trying to sleep."

Barney wasn't really sure, because he couldn't see Ted's face, but he was pretty sure that he scowled and stormed out.

Beneath the covers, Scooter sighed and turned over, snuggling up to him affectionately and started nuzzling his neck.

Barney grinned.

They couldn't really use the "we're drunk" excuse any longer but, hey, who cared?

And Scooter did seem like a really cool guy.

Barney wondered if he needed a wingman…