Alrighty, it's been awhile. A loooong while. This story's been posted on another site for a long time but someone asked that I put it up here so I'm obliging. It's totally alternate universe--written long before the sixth or seventh books came out--and characters are (obviously) not sticking to canon. It also has graphic sexuality. Consider yourself warned.

As always, I own nothing but my trusty laptop and this was not intended to be a literary masterpiece. Enjoy!

To any who are interested, there will be a few more stories going up (and by a few I mean like one or two) that have been moldering on my hard drive for a very long time now.

Bold/Italicized text indicates a memory or flashback scene.

--Aimes

***********

Hermione Granger-Snape settled into the bath and idly played with the bubbles. Nina Simone's sultry voice filled the steamy room as Hermione pondered.

It had been eight months since she'd married Severus Snape. It had been a strategic move during the War, to get another operative on the inside. Voldemort had long been thinking of recruiting her, despite her origins, and having Snape seduce her and marry her after graduation had seemed the perfect plan. When Snape had revealed this to the Order, Remus had pointed out that it might be a valuable opportunity to get someone else on the inside, someone who could use different techniques to gain information.

"No fucking way!" Ron insisted. "Think of what they'll do to her if anything goes wrong!"

"It's no worse than what they'd do to Professor Snape if things went wrong," Hermione pointed out. Ginny nodded her agreement.

It's far worse," Snape interjected. "I am a traitor but I am not a Muggleborn."

It was a simple statement of fact and Dumbledore inclined his head to indicate his agreement. Hermione glanced at Snape askance, a bit thrown off that he hadn't used the term Mudblood. Hell, she'd almost gotten used to hearing it from various Slytherins. Even those that had joined their cause used the term to avoid suspicion.

"The fact is that we need another operative on the inside. Severus has access to the inner circle of Voldemort, however he is not close to any of the other Death Eaters save Lucius and the members of the inner circle," Remus pointed out.

"Hermione may be able to connect with others to gain a feel for the general attitude of the troops. If it is tenuous?" he shrugged. "It could be used to our advantage."

"Why does he want me?" Hermione asked. "I am close to Harry, but he must realize that this will change if I become involved with you. The abject hatred between the two of you is no secret."

Snape sneered a bit at that before responding. "He wants your brain, Miss Granger. Other than myself, Narcissa, and Bellatrix, Voldemort's supporters have power and money but not a complete brain among the lot of them. Bellatrix and Narcissa are the most dangerous of his supporters because they are cunning and they are brilliant but most importantly, they are cruel for the sake of cruelty. Narcissa has admitted to me that she cares nothing for Voldemort's cause; she stays because she enjoys it." He nearly spat the last of it. His expression was blank but everyone present could hear the disgust.

"Hermione could connect with the other women. They must understand what it is like to be female and brilliant in a man's world and it will draw them to Hermione's own brilliance," Remus observed.

"Why are you so keen to throw Hermione into danger?" Molly asked Remus angrily.

"I think," said a voice softly, finally, "that in the end it's Hermione's decision anyway, isn't it?" Harry spoke for the first time since the discussion had started. He looked unhappy and torn. "On the one hand, it is very dangerous, but on the other, Professor Snape can't do it alone and this could be the key to turning the war."

Hermione gazed at him tiredly. When had he grown up? She nodded silently at him and the table fell silent.

"Well, Miss Granger?" asked Dumbledore.

"I think it's a good plan. Severus will watch out for me where he can, I've no doubt. Besides, I'm no idiot and no martyr—I'll keep myself alive. And if this aids the war?" she shrugged. "So be it."

She had no way of knowing that a simple decision could make such a difference in her life.

And it had worked. They'd married in October and Hermione had gotten close to Narcissa Malfoy and Bellatrix Lestrange, both of whom were eager to have another female presence, especially one as intelligent and powerful as Hermione. Within four months of the 'marriage,' Voldemort had been defeated. By gossipy women, no less. Narcissa and Bellatrix gleefully welcomed Hermione into their fold after she'd proven herself invaluable in creating a charm to deflect body-binding hexes. Hermione, in turn, pretended to worship the older women and their 'wisdom.'

Of course those four months had not been a cakewalk. Hermione and Snape were constantly on edge, sniping at each other before realizing that of all the people in the universe, only the other understood the torture of being a double agent.

Hermione walked into the living room and saw him on the couch leaning forward, head in his hands.

"Severus?" she asked curiously as she walked toward him. He said nothing and she knelt in front of him. It had been weeks since their last full-on argument. Their truce of mutual respect had been sealed when Hermione had looked him in the eye and apologized for being a total bitch. Since then they'd both been stronger, as though the support of the other was enough to make all the difference. Tonight, however, Severus looked haunted and Hermione was concerned.

"Severus?" she repeated, taking his face gently in her hands.

"No!" he growled suddenly. "Don't touch me!" He caught her wrists roughly, bruising them, and turned away from her.

"Leave me alone, you stupid girl!" Hermione's brow furrowed and she moved closer, ignoring the insult.

"Severus, what's happened?" she asked softly. She reached a hand toward his face and his grip on her wrists tightened.

"Don't," he whispered raggedly, releasing her and pushing her away. He brought his hands up to his face once more.

Hermione hesitated a moment before climbing into his lap and wrapping her arms around him, holding his head to her chest.

"No! Don't; I don't want this! …I don't deserve this," he gasped brokenly, trying to push her away.

"Shhh…hush, darling," she'd whispered, resting her cheek on his head and gripping him tightly. He sagged against her, defeated. "You must hurt so much inside," she said softly. "But you're safe with me. I know how your soul aches. It's okay to hurt. I'm here now."

Hermione tried to lead him to the bedroom but he resisted and she relented. They slept on the couch, Severus' face still buried against her. She slept little, simply holding him as he trembled and soothing him when he began to whimper in his dreams.

When they woke, she held him tightly, and he hid his face against her for several moments, breathing deeply. She kissed the top of his head gently.

"Let me make you breakfast, Severus," she whispered softly.

He shook his head against her. "Do not trouble yourself," he rumbled in a gravelly voice. "I am not hungry."

"You're eating breakfast, Severus Snape, if I have to sit on you and force it down your throat," she growled. "You have two choices: eggs or pancakes."

He sighed. "Pancakes."

Hermione maneuvered off the couch and offered him her hand. His eyes were faded and tired but something sparked through them as he reached for her hand. He caught it gently and pulled it toward him.

"I did this." Her wrists had blue and green bruises blossoming. Hermione twined her fingers with his and leaned over to kiss him on the cheek. Severus turned his head, avoiding her touch, and she sighed. Hermione sat next to him and wrapped her arms around him once more, resting her head on his shoulder. After a moment his arm slid around her waist, and they stared at the empty fireplace.

"I bruise easily, Severus," she finally said. "It's not as though you intended to do it."

"I still hurt you," he responded. Another silence. "I am sorry."

"There's no need to apologize," Hermione told him. "None at all." She rose from the couch and pulled him to his feet, hugging him once more before proceeding to the kitchen.

They ate breakfast in relative silence, and before Severus left, Hermione grabbed his arm and forced him to face her.

"Take care of yourself, Severus. I'd be lost without you," she said with a smile before reaching up and kissing him briefly on the lips.

Hermione went upstairs to shower and Severus watched her for a moment before shaking himself out of his reverie and leaving the house.

That afternoon Hermione learned that he'd had to watch Bellatrix Lestrange cast the Cruciatus on Neville Longbottom.

"He survived," Lestrange said flippantly, her mad voice grating on Hermione's nerves. "Three Crucio's aren't enough to kill anyone. But you should have seen the betrayed look he gave Severus!" She laughed gleefully. "Snape must have loved it!"

Hermione laughed with Bellatrix and then went home and cried.

And it had gone both ways. Snape was gentle with her and concerned. Despite their short tempers he was quick to defend her and did his best to comfort her. Hermione remembered the first night they had begun sleeping not just in the same bed but in one another's arms.

Hermione kept pushing herself. She couldn't believe what she'd done and yet believed it all too well. Errand for the Dark Lord, they'd told her. Bonding between the girls, they'd said.

Torture was what she called it.

She, Narcissa, and Bellatrix had been given Susan Bones. Their job was to 'send a message' to her mother in no uncertain terms. Killing her had never been mentioned. Narcissa and Bellatrix had wanted Hermione to begin by casting the Cruciatus. Hermione had frozen inwardly before gathering up all her hatred and anger towards Voldemort and channeling it, casting the curse on Susan. Susan's screams hit her very soul and Hermione had tried not to flinch. Narcissa and Bellatrix had happily taken over after that, and Hermione lingered in the background, forcing herself to cheer them on. Within a few moments, Susan was limp on the ground and Hermione had instinctively known she was dead.

"This will send quite the message, I think," Narcissa laughed. Hermione smiled in agreement, trying not to be sick.

"I think I might have the makings of an idea," she said quietly. Bellatrix and Narcissa had looked over at her surprised and cheerful.

"Well what is it then?" Bellatrix encouraged. If not for the fact that they were monsters, Hermione often reflected, they'd be quite ideal friends: supportive, caring, and cheerful.

"I don't want to say anything until I'm sure," she replied thoughtfully, staring at Susan's body. "Everyone knows I do my best thinking at a Muggle gym, sweating it out. I'll talk to you tomorrow, okay? If Severus comes around looking for me, just tell him I had an idea and am thinking it through."

"Of course, darling. He'll know where to find you," Narcissa responded with a smile. "Go on then, your ideas thus far have been fantastic. We'll clean up. Or have elves do it, anyway. Oh, and darling, do take a night with Severus! You barely even see him anymore, I'm sure. And he's always struck me as far more faithful than my own worthless wretch of a husband." She gave an exasperated look.

Bellatrix smiled. "You talk as though you wrote the book on faithfulness," she teased.

Narcissa did her best to look innocent. "I can't help that I like my fun."

All three of them had laughed and Hermione tried not to let her nausea show. Narcissa gave her air kisses and Bellatrix thumped her on the back. Hermione left without further comment.

She had been going at it for almost two hours. Staff members were considerately refilling her water bottle and not disturbing her as she pushed on at one of the highest levels, music so loud it was probably damaging her ears, working out the anger and frustration; the self-loathing. Severus Snape entered and asked where she was. The desk manager pointed at her and he came and stood near her, watching her. Hermione felt his presence and looked over, catching his eye. She stopped abruptly, and her knees folded beneath her. Severus caught her as she fell and lifted her into his arms silently. Hermione buried her face in his neck, shaking, and let him take her home.

Severus carried her to the bedroom and set her on the bed. He went into the bathroom and came out with a towel.

"Hermione, I'm going to run you a bath. Do you think you can undress and wrap yourself in this towel?" Hermione looked at him dully.

Severus went back into the bathroom and began running the bath, pouring in scented bubbles. When he returned to the bedroom she was sitting on the bed still in her gym clothes, staring at her wand where she'd left it on the dresser.

He removed her socks and shoes before he pulled her into a standing position and walked her to the bathroom. Severus faced her away from him and pulled off her shirt and sports bra before unhooking her bra and letting it fall. He stared firmly ahead as he gently pushed her sweats and underwear down her hips, hands barely brushing her skin.

He put his hands on her shoulders and guided her into the bath, still not looking down at her body. Once she was submerged and covered with the bubbles he looked down at her. After a moment of thought, he helped her wash her hair then turned her face toward his.

"Dear one, you must finish on your own," he told her gently. "I'll be right here when you're done and then we'll go to bed." He stood and pulled the curtain shut…and waited. Hermione released the drain and finished her shower, rinsing the conditioner out of her hair and washing her body. She turned off the water and another wave of exhaustion hit her. Her hand dropped back down to her side. Snape pulled the curtain aside and wrapped a towel around her. For a moment he contemplated trying to lead her outside, but gave up and lifted her into his arms. He set her on her feet next to the bed and went to the closet, but she clung stubbornly to his hand.

"I'm just getting you clothes, dear one," he murmured soothingly, kissing her forehead. He came back with the grey tank top she wore to bed, a pair of panties, and her pajama bottoms. He'd changed quickly in the process into his customary sleepwear of pajama bottoms and no shirt. He held out her clothes. She looked at them for a moment before wrapping her arms around him and pulling him into her.

Severus held her for a moment before pulling back and kneeling in front of her. With great care he made her step into the panties and he pulled them up, looking only into her eyes and trying not to touch her too much or make her uncomfortable.

Then he cast a drying charm on her hair and body and tugged the tank top over her head. When she raised her arms, the towel fell, and Severus looked away quickly as he slid the shirt down.

Hermione began to tremble once more and wrapped her arms around his neck, pressing her face against his bare skin as tears ran down her face.

"Severus?" she choked, shaking violently. "I…"

"Hush, Hermione." She began to sob with abandon. Giving up on the pajama bottoms, Severus maneuvered them into bed and enfolded her in his arms.

"I won't leave you, dear one," he said in a low hypnotic voice. He dropped light soothing kisses on the top of her head and rubbed her back quietly until she calmed and fell asleep from exhaustion. The first time killing a friend was the most crushing, he reflected, though it never really got easier.

From that night on she slept in his arms. Both of them were comforted by the other, by the gentle touches and soft sleepy sighs. Mostly it helped them feel human again, as though even now, despite all they'd been and done, someone might still want them; someone might still hold them.

Hermione and Snape began to lose their tempers with others slowly, their stress levels peaking and causing them to lash out at everyone and everything. Hermione vividly remembered one particular encounter with Harry.

"Bloody hell, Hermione, you become more like him every day!"

Hermione snapped.

"You think this is easy, Harry? You just have to kill the bastard! We have to pretend to be like him. And do you know something? After awhile you've done so many terrible things in the name of the cause and experienced so many painful nights that you stop feeling it and begin to think maybe, just maybe, you're not pretending anymore."

Hermione glared angrily, fire sparking from her eyes and Harry drew up short.

"Hermione, I had no idea…"

"Of course not, Harry. Because you're surrounded on all sides by people telling you that you are the deciding factor of this war, the only thing that matters. Everyone forgets those of us who do the dirty work." She glared for a moment then shook her head and sighed. "I'm sorry, Harry, I didn't mean that, but it really is hard. And I'm not likely to get any better tempered until this is over. If you can't handle it…"

"No, no," Harry pulled her into a hug. "I'm sorry for being a self-absorbed jerk, 'Mione. Please, just be safe for me, okay?"

"Always," she replied wryly. "And Harry?"

"Yeah?" She looked him in the eye.

"Please remember that he's got it even harder than I do," she said softly. Harr'?s objection to their marriage and subsequent decision to get over her choice to save their friendship had been a very public spectacle, lending the situation credence. But Harry and Severus remained hostile toward one another.

From then on, Harry had avoided Severus completely and Severus had returned the favor. They would never be friends, but came to a tacit agreement to be civil, if only for the sake of Hermione.

But it was over.

Which should have meant that Snape and Hermione could go their separate ways. Unfortunately, it didn't work that way. Marriages were binding during the first year, to increase the chance of expanding the wizarding population and to force couples to seriously think it through before marrying--or divorcing. Domestic abuse could void the magical contract, but the abuser ended up in St. Mungo's Oblivate-ReEducate Program at best and Azkaban at worst. Besides, Snape had absolutely no desire to lay a violent hand on Hermione and Hermione was not a big fan of beating the crap out of someone of whom she was fond. The other two things that could void the contract were failure to consummate the relationship and infidelity.

Hermione smiled wanly as she thought of the night four months ago that Voldemort had fallen. She and Severus had returned home and celebrated. Both had been swept away with triumph and enough wine to lower their inhibitions a bit and…well they definitely consummated the relationship. She smirked to herself. They hadn't decided that night that they were made for each other and pledged their love forevermore… They had gone back to a state of normalcy come morning, neither of them mentioning it again.

Hermione and Severus returned home, arm in arm, still smiling. Hermione went straight for the cellar and came up with an expensive bottle of wine.

"I think we deserve to celebrate, Severus, don't you?" she gave him a cheeky smile and a wink, and he grinned.

Between the two of them they finished the first bottle and were three-quarters of the way through the second when Hermione put on a Dean Martin CD and went to Snape.

"Dance with me Severus," she said softly. He made a bit of a face at her but set his wine glass on the coffee table and pulled her into his arms. He sang along softly in her ear and Hermione giggled against him.

Within moments they established a slow, comfortable routine and Hermione pulled back to look him in the eye. They stopped dancing and she lifted her hand to caress his cheek.

"Severus," she whispered. He bent to kiss her and she responded, whimpering as his tongue entered her mouth. Hermione felt as though he was consuming her, and she drew him closer. Her hands slipped under his cloak and pushed it off his shoulders before untucking his shirt and sliding her hands beneath it.

Severus unzipped her dress and let it pool at her feet, whispering kisses down her throat and lingering at the base. Hermione moaned softly as she unbuttoned his shirt, tugging it off him, and unbuckling his belt. His pants fell to the floor and her mouth found his once more. Severus lifted her in his arms and carried her to the bedroom, setting her gently on the bed. He carefully, meticulously removed her bra sucked and nipped at her breasts, before kissing the soft curves of her stomach till he hit the edge of her panties. With agonizing slowness he slid them off and kissed her hips and thighs with care. Hermione sat up a bit to remove his boxers and toss them across the room.

Severus pushed her back and lowered himself over her, kissing her deeply. He pulled back for a brief moment to study her face.

"Hermione…" he said quietly, rolling the syllables in his mouth. Hermione shivered and whimpered softly. "Are you sure?"

Hermione wrapped her legs around him and positioned him at her entrance in response. They both groaned deeply at his first thrust before working up a rhythm. There was no noise but the faint strains of the music and their soft moans of pleasure. Hermione began to shudder beneath him, and Severus pulled back to look her in the eyes, holding her gaze as she came.

"Severus!" she gasped, still holding eye contact. He came soon after her, growling her name and finally breaking their gaze as he collapsed against her. She wrapped her arms around him and they fell asleep together.

Morning came, and Hermione was in her familiar position in his arms, half draped across his chest. He woke first, and stroked her head gently.

"Hermione? I have to get up," he said softly.

"Isn't today some sort of holiday?"

"Only for those not involved in the war," he'd replied wryly. "Those of us who were must debrief the others. You have a meeting with Albus at eleven-thirty, remember?"

Hermione groaned in response.

"Are you going to let me up?" he asked, amused.

"No," she replied stubbornly, burrowing her face in the crook of his neck to avoid the sunlight peeking in through the drapes. Her hand curled around his shoulder, rubbing the muscles briefly before settling. Severus let his arm slide down to her hip.

"Please, Hermione," he wheedled. "I really must go."

Hermione groaned and moved off of him reluctantly. He rose and she grabbed his pillow, pulling it under her head and burying her face in it as she rolled onto her stomach with a grunt. The sheet slipped down to her waist and Severus hesitated, gazing at her soft form as she dozed. He stepped toward her and touched her shoulder, running a feather-light hand down her back. Hermione sighed contentedly and a faint smile appeared on his face. When he reached the edge of the sheet, he pulled it up and tucked it around her body before placing a gentle kiss on the back of her neck. Hermione shivered and made a soft noise in her sleep. Severus pulled the blanket over her and tucked it in as well before dressing and leaving.

That evening they returned home as usual and when Hermione reached up to kiss him, he'd kept it brief and chaste before pulling her into a gentle hug and asking what she wanted for dinner. She had not pursued it further, assuming he didn't want to make love to her again.

Infidelity had never been an option for her. She had no intention of sleeping with someone else while married to Snape, even if the marriage was false. He seemed to share her view, as the contract still held.

"Hermione…if there's someone else, I won't be offended," he said softly one night as she lay in his arms as usual, half draped across his chest.

"What are you talking about?" she mumbled into his collarbone sleepily.

"We both know that we married in order to help win the war. If there is someone else you are attracted to…" he trailed off for a moment, "Do not feel restricted by or beholden to me."

"Severus, are you having an affair with someone?" she asked, brow furrowed. She rose up to look him in the eye seriously. "Because if you are, just come out and say it."

"There is no one in my life but you," he replied quietly. "I just wanted you to know that you have your freedom."

"You're a silly man," she told him, kissing him on the nose. She settled back against him and began to drift. "You're the only one in my life, too," she said before falling completely asleep.

Thus they remained as they were. They went their own ways in the morning and returned home in the evenings. One or the other of them cooked, or they went out, and they did various things with their time together: walks, movies, or simply sitting on the couch together, reading. Perhaps, Hermione reflected, it was better that they hadn't had sex since that night. Their relationship simply kept building on itself, moving from strategic partners to mutual respect to fondness and affection. Hermione enjoyed snuggling against him at night as she fell asleep, feeling his strong arms wrap around her and his long fingers knead her hip. His favorite activity was laying his head in her lap as they watched a movie or read, knowing she would absently begin to stroke his hair, tangling her smaller, delicate fingers in his black locks.

Of course, it was a bit of a problem in some ways. Hermione was genuinely fond of Severus Snape. Hell, she was more than fond: she loved him at this point. But she had no clear idea of what he felt for her.

His birthday, however, had left her with some clues. Early in their 'marriage' she'd discovered his weakness for handmade chocolate. For his birthday three days earlier, she'd found an amazing recipe and worked all day to make him some. When he'd come home, she gave him the finished product.

"What's this?" he looked confused.

"Well, I know how much you love chocolate…so I made you some. For your birthday." He gave her a long, unreadable look.

"Try one," she pushed with a nervous laugh.

Severus picked one up and took a bite, closing his eyes.

"They aren't any good are they? I'm sorry; you don't have to eat them to make me feel better. I just wanted…to give you something special," she told him a bit miserably. "Severus? Have I poisoned you?"

He put the chocolate back on the tray and took the tray from her hand, placing it on the table before pulling her into a tight, crushing hug.

"They're amazing," he whispered against her. "You spent all day doing this? For me?" He sounded awed. "Thank you, Hermione." He pulled away from her and gazed down at her for a long moment before popping the half-eaten chocolate in her mouth. "They taste wonderful," he said softly. "As you can see." He kissed her lightly on the lips, tasting the exquisite chocolate, and seemed to linger for a moment before pulling away, black eyes unreadable. Hermione gazed up at him, waiting, but he simply wrapped an arm around her, picked up the tray, and led her outside.

They spent the rest of the evening eating the chocolates and looking at constellations in the backyard, content with one another.

Hermione sighed as she thought about choices. If she had been given a choice, she almost definitely would not have chosen this dark, intense, sarcastic man with the unexpected love of chocolate. And yet…here she was. Happy. Happy with this quiet, gentle, thoughtful presence in her life who asked how her day was and poked fun at her affectionately at every opportunity. Certainly he could be difficult, but then, so could she.

"You insufferable, know-it-all brat! Get the bloody hell out of here this instant! You've ruined this potion!"

"ME? You're an arrogant, condescending, patronizing son of a bitch, or hadn't you noticed! Just because you can't give proper instructions to save your life—

"You've buggered this potion to Hades and back!" he raged. "I said lacewings, not asphodel!"

Hermione pulled herself up to let loose a response and then stopped short. "Did you? Are you certain? Because I swear I heard asphodel." She was suddenly uncertain.

"Of course I'm--well I'm fairly sure I—" her hesitation had tripped him up. "Shit!" he cursed. "It doesn't bloody matter, the potion is fucked anyway, isn't it?" It was as close as he usually came to an apology unless he was outright wrong. When he was, he swallowed his pride and apologized sincerely. Hermione was similarly pigheaded but she was quicker to question whether or not she was right and slower to apologize fully. Her Gryffindor pride often got the better of her but she worked at it. They both did.

"Can we start again? I'll help you," she offered. "And I promise I'll pay closer attention."

"The base won't take long," he replied quietly. "And this potion only takes three days to simmer. I was ahead of schedule anyways. Go to bed. You have a meeting in the morning with the young Mr. Malfoy that will likely take all your energy."

"Pansy will be there to buffer it. She's not the smartest of girls, but she's loyal and courageous to have turned sides. She'll keep the peace, even if she does think I'm a turncoat Gryffindor bitch." She smiled wanly. "Besides, the dark shadows beneath my eyes will just make Malfoy think I've been up all night shagging you, which will drive him and his father batty. Let me help, Severus. Please."

She gazed at him sincerely and he gave a small nod and a bare smile. "Grind the petals of night-blooming jasmine until you have three teaspoons' worth," he requested softly.

Hermione complied and they worked together for the rest of the night. The balance of their relationship had been restored and their humour gradually returned till they were gently teasing one another as usual.

A quiet knock came at the bathroom door.

"Come in," she called. Severus Snape peeked his head around the door and saw her in the bath, body hidden by the curtain and the bubbles from the neck down.

"Are you ever coming out?" he asked teasingly. She gestured to him and he came in and closed the door to prevent the warm air from escaping. He leaned against the counter with a faint smile on his face. "I thought we could go out for dinner."

"Sorry, I got lost in my thoughts," she said with a smile.

"Any interesting ones?"

She gazed at him for a long, contemplative moment. "Ask me later," she said finally, softly. He seemed unsettled but nodded his agreement.

She stood up abruptly, water sloshing in the bathtub. "Let me finish showering and get dressed and we'll go wherever you want," Hermione said more brightly. "Pick me something to wear, will you?"

"Am I your fashion designer?" he asked with amusement in his voice.

"Heavens, no. If you were, everything in my closet would be black," she shot back, giggling. She rinsed the shampoo out of her hair and worked in some conditioner, smiling when she heard the door click shut. Her shower was finished quickly and she wrapped a towel around her wet hair and one around her body. She walked outside into the bedroom and saw Severus sitting on the armchair, reading a book of poetry. He looked up at her and his eyes softened ever so slightly. He gestured at the bed before returning his attention to the book.

Hermione glanced down at the long lavender skirt and v-necked white blouse he'd chosen for her but made no move to pick them up. Instead she walked around the bed and sat on the edge, watching him. After a minute or so, Severus looked up from the book with a curious expression.

"What is wrong?"

"Nothing," she replied quietly. "Ask me now what I was thinking about."

He raised an eyebrow, eyes darting briefly to the towel wrapped around her torso. Hermione waited patiently.

"What were you thinking about?" he asked, seeming a bit unsure. He set the book on the side table and focused on her intently.

"You," she told him simply, removing the towel from her hair and tossing it on the bed. Hermione stood, walked over to the armchair, and sat sideways in his lap, legs over one arm of the chair. Severus wrapped an arm around her to steady her reflexively, his curious gaze upon her.

"Me," he repeated in a low voice.

She nodded, studying his face for a moment before resting against his chest, her head tucked under his chin. "I was thinking about how we so often make wrong choices; foolish choices. I was thinking that had I been given a choice, I wouldn't be here. I wouldn't be with you. I was thinking about life without you."

His eyes closed and he braced himself for what was coming: she was seeing someone else.

"I was thinking about how horrible it would be to not have you here to tease me. To not wake up in your arms. To not watch movies with you; to not hear your opinions and ideas."

Hermione pulled away to face him then leaned forward and to the side a bit and rested her head against his, cheek to cheek, so that she was whispering directly into his ear.

"I was thinking about how even now you might not choose me and I was thinking about having to wonder for the rest of my life what would have happened if I'd told you how much I love you." Her voice caught and she wished she had some sort of reaction from him. Suddenly his arms tightened around her and she realized how unsteady his breathing had become.

"So I decided that I should just tell you and not wonder about it anymore. I chose to marry you to help the war and it was the best choice I've ever made. I love you." The towel slid down to her hips and she pressed against him, suddenly shy and nervous.

"Say it again," he whispered slowly. "Please." He felt her soft curves press against him and fought back the groan that threatened to emerge.

"I love you," she murmured in his ear. His hands gripped her bare hips convulsively. "I love you; I love you; I love you."

Hermione felt the hot dampness against her neck and realized he was crying.

"Severus? That wasn't the reaction I was hoping for." She pulled back to look him in the eyes, reaching up to wipe his glittering tears away. His expression was blank but the shimmering tracks told her all she needed to know. Her gaze flickered to his mouth and she leaned in to kiss him hesitantly. He returned the kiss and deepened it with the same hesitation she had shown. Hermione responded, letting her tongue explore his mouth almost lazily and feeling her stomach flutter as his tongue dipped into her mouth, tasting her. He became more aggressive, staking his claim, his hands kneading her flesh.

They broke the kiss after what felt like only seconds, trying to regain their breath. Severus lifted her into his arms, carried her to the bed and set her down. She lifted her hand toward his face once more and he caught it, kissing the palm lightly, tongue darting out to lick it gently. He took her face in his hands and looked at her seriously.

"I love you, Hermione. I have loved you for so long," he said wistfully. "But I want you to be sure that…"

"Did you hear anything I said?" Hermione cut in. "I love you, Severus. You make me happy. I can imagine life without you. I'd hate it. Every second of it."

She kissed him again heatedly, her body responding to the months of repressed desire and longing. Severus kissed the column of her throat and his hands slid out to let her fingers lace with his. He moved further down her body, mouth tugging at her hard nipples. He raised his lips just a bit and blew gently on the moist buds, making her moan and arch toward him.

"Severus, yes, please!" she pleaded. "Touch me…" she murmured, her hands gripping his tightly. He smiled and she felt the movement of his mouth against her other breast, making her tingle. He continued down her body, flicking his tongue into her navel and prompting indistinct sounds to pour from her mouth. It made him laugh gently, the sound like velvet rubbing against her skin.

When he reached her curls, Severus released her hands to draw his fingers down her body and pull her legs over his shoulders. He parted her lips gently and licked her roughly. Hermione responded to the aggressive touch, letting out a whimper. Severus continued his ministrations, working up a rhythm before thrusting two fingers into her tight channel and beginning to stroke in a counter rhythm. Hermione writhed, thighs gripping him, heels digging into his shoulder blades. She came hard, with his tongue stroking her sensitive bundle of nerves and then came again, explosively, from his strong, sure fingers.

Her legs slid down his shoulders and came to rest at his hips. Hermione rode out the wave of her orgasms and wrapped her legs around his waist, pulling him closer. When her ankles were locked around his hips she opened her eyes and smiled up at him. She grabbed her wand from the nightstand and murmured a quick spell to disintegrate his clothing. His wand fell to the floor as his garments vanished.

"I liked that sweater. You gave it to me," he said softly, smiling down at her.

"I'll give you another. I'll give you lots. You'll be swimming in sweaters. Make love to me, Severus. Shag me, fuck me, touch me. Touch me," she repeated more softly, raggedly. His rigid cock pressed against her still-sensitive center and he could feel the desire overwhelming him. Hermione reached over and wrapped her hands around his cock, guiding it toward her entrance.

Severus thrust quickly and suddenly they were joined. The sensation of it seared them both. All their emotion was reflected in that initial thrust and it lit their senses aflame. He began thrusting into her slowly, enjoying the feel of her muscles rippling around him, gripping him. He closed his eyes and groaned desperately. She smiled and pulled him closer, nails digging into his back as she let out inarticulate cries to urge him on.

They came almost simultaneously. Hermione screamed his name, throwing her head back and arching into him and Severus growled her name possessively, holding her tightly. He collapsed against her, breathing hard, his softening cock slipping from her embrace.

Severus rolled to the side of her and pulled the blankets over them, pulling her into his arms. "Oh, Severus," she murmured as she fell asleep, his hand kneading her hip familiarly. She kissed his chest and rested her head near his heart, letting the rhythm lull her. They fell asleep smiling.

When they woke, Severus stiffened, unsure for a moment. Hermione yawned against him and stretched, catlike.

"I love you," she mumbled against him, wrapping her arms around him tightly.

"I love you too," he replied.

"Good."

This made him smile. "I don't deserve you, Hermione."

"You have me anyway," she laughed against him. "Make love to me and then let's go back to sleep. We'll stay in bed all day and not get up till dinner time." She hummed against him. "I want to know everything that makes you moan, Severus," she whispered huskily. "I want to live happily ever after with you and have a lifetime to touch you and wake up to you and hear your voice."

"You have me forever, dear one," he replied, voice low and intense. "I am yours for as long as you want me."

"And what about happily ever after?" she teased.

He chuckled gently and pulled her up to look her in the eye. "That's already begun, my love," he whispered against her lips before claiming her mouth again.

Hermione smiled as he kissed her and caressed her adoringly.

Happily ever after had begun indeed.