Kiss and Tell

Just three weeks ago, Clary was an only child living with her mother in a Brooklyn neighborhood in New York City. She was taking a summer art class at Tisch before her junior year at Xavier High School. She liked to hang out with her best friend, Simon. And as far as she knew, her father had died in a car accident before she was even born.

Then on one otherwise predictable evening out with Simon, her life was turned completely upside down when she discovered that a magical world exists, one that she would have seen all along if her mother did not have Magus, a warlock, place a spell on her, blocking out her ability to see anything magical around her.

The turning point came one night at an all ages club when she met a boy, a Shadowhunter, named Jace. Not only did he introduce her to the world of fairies, vampires, and werewolves, he also saved her life when a Ravener demon attacked her after her mother was kidnapped. She found herself attracted to this golden haired boy. Through her connection with him she discovered that her father is alive, but he's a complete madman, that her best friend, Simon, accidentally became a vampire, and that he, Jace, is really her brother.

As if all that wasn't enough, Clary then discovers that her mother was kidnapped by her father, Valentine, in his attempt to obtain the Mortal Cup. Even thought her mother, Jocelyn, had placed herself under a spell, Valentine got his hands on the cup and eventually the Mortal Sword. Now this madman was at the Shadowhunter headquarters in Idris. Somehow Clary felt that she could survive this entire fiasco if only she wasn't in love with Jace.

Faced with going to Idris to confront their father, Jace did everything in his power to stop he. Through Clary's unique use of runes she found herself in the Shadowhunter's home land. Once there she accidentally walked in on Jace, finding him in an embrace with another girl. Clary worried that Aline could be the reason he hadn't wanted her go to Idris. Well, she knew there was only one way to find out. She took a deep breath and headed down the hall.

"Jace," Clary peeked her head into his immaculately clean bedroom. He was sitting in the middle of his pristine bed cleaning his stele. "I'm sorry; I can come back later if you're busy."

Jace looked up from under his tousled blond hair, "No, come on in," he said with a grin and patting his blue down comforter indicating he wanted her to sit at his side.

Her bare feet padded across the Oriental rug as she made her way over to him. She was too uneasy to sit beside him, so she just stood, awkwardly, at the foot of the bed. Jace rolled his eyes and patted the mattress with more force. "Come on, I won't bite, hard." He joked.

Hesitantly she climbed onto the bed, not at all sure that he wouldn't bite after she said what she had come to say. "I'm guessing you need to talk to me about something important." His eyes sparkled, becoming more animated as he spoke, "You haven't so much as looked in my direction all day. Honestly, I didn't think you had that much self control, I know how irresistible I can be."

She over looked his remark, "I want to talk to you about this afternoon."

"You mean when you walked in on me kissing Aline?"

"Yeah that, I…"

But he cut her off, placing his hand gently upon her lips. "Clary, I have to apologize. I never meant to hurt you," He said as he let his hand slide from her lips down her neck and left it to rest on her chest.

She could feel the tears burning her eyes. "But Jace, it was wrong of me to just barge in, I feel horrible," she sobbed knowing that the real reason she was crying was because she was hurt, angry even, that he could move on so easily.

He threw his hand in the air, "You. Feel. Horrible? How can you feel horrible? I'm the one who was kissing someone else."

"Yes, but Jace, we're brother and sister, and we can't… "

"No, I know we shouldn't feel the way we do, but we do, and I can't stand being good any more." And with that he wrapped his arms around her, pulled her closer and began to kiss her.

At first Clary gave in to the pure pleasure of Jace's lips moving in rhythm with her own, but as he pressed more tightly the anger began to well up again and she shoved him away with all of her strength.

Looking somewhat hurt, Jace slowly backed away. Then with his usual smirk painted across his face he said, "See, I knew you couldn't resist me."

Clary reached up and whipped the moisture from her cheeks as she slid off the bed and headed for the door. Why did her anger always give her away with tears, she pondered as she headed for the door.

He stood there in front of her, blocking her path. No matter how many times he sped past her she was always amazed at the soundlessness of his movements.

His voice was unruffled, "Now just where do you think you're going?" he asked from underneath his golden curls. "You're not planning on kissing and telling, are you?"

She was outraged, "Is that all you're worried about? You think I'm going to tell Aline…" Her voice rose, she could actually taste the acid as she spoke.

"Clary," Jace interrupted saying her name very slowly. "That's not what I meant at all."

She stood there with her arms crossed, an attempt to hold back her displeasure. "Can I leave now, please?"

"Not until you tell me why you're here," he said, his look penetrating straight into her deepest thoughts.

Seeing him like this made it hard to stay angry. She tried to break the gaze, but the way the light from the chandelier moved across his eyes, they appeared almost golden. She forced her focus back on his face knowing that if she continued staring at his eyes, the truth of how much she loved him would come out of her mouth at a speed she couldn't stop.

"When you say here do you mean 'here' as in your bedroom or 'here' as in the great spiritual question of our purpose here on this planet?" She asked mockingly, remembering a night not too long ago when he asked that same question of her.

A smile crossed his face, knowing that he had been forgiven, he lead Clary back to his bed. "Now, are you going to tell me what's been bothering you?"

Not that she had any dignity left; she still felt fear in letting him know how she really felt. The last time she intended telling Jace how she felt, he had interrupted her and she never let him know what she was really thinking. The thought of what Luke had said to her. '…if you can't tell the truth to the people you care about the most, eventually you stop being able to tell the truth to yourself.' She took a deep breath. " I was talking to Sebastian this afternoon," she paused as she looked up from under her lashes, judging his reaction.

"Oh yes, Sebastian, your new best friend." He raised his had dismissively.

Hesitantly she continued, "He was telling me about Steven, the old Inquisitor's son."

"Yes," he said slowly remembering the whole ugly incident with the Inquisitor.

"Well, Sebastian said that Steven was married and that his wife was eight month pregnant when the uprising occurred."

"Why do you want to recapitulate to recapitulate that whole ugly incident?"

"Recapitulate," Clary repeated, that's a big word."

"And I'm a big -"

Clary rolled her eyes.

"Tease, I was going to say tease."

"Of course, you were. Do you want to hear this or should I leave now?"

Watching him as he took his fingers and imitated the turning of a key in front of his lip, Clary proceeded.

"The bodies of both Steven and his wife were burned. She was almost nine months pregnant, but the baby's body was never found." She paused, "Sebastian thinks the baby is still alive, he'd be a bit older than me."

"And is that what you think too, that the baby survived?"

"Oh Jace, I just want to consider all the possibilities. You could be - "But she couldn't bring herself to finish the sentence, to actually say it out loud

Becoming uncharacteristically quiet Jace lay back on his pillow, exhaling deeply. "I'm really tired; I'd like to get some sleep now if you don't mind."

Clary knew that was her cue to leave. She didn't want to push him too far, not tonight, not after he had kissed her. She quietly slipped off the bed and left the room.

Clary stood in the dark hall with her cheek pressed against the door. If she had only known that Jace had followed her and was standing just on the other side of the cold door with his forehead and hand on only inches away from her, longing for her touch.