Chapter 21: Judgment and Decree

July came and Hannah got her first ear infection. I would walk around the house with her at night, irritable and exhausted with sleep deprivation, wishing that Emmett were there to take the baby from me and tell me to go to bed. But he didn't. And in August, Catherine went back to school and Lucy went away to Dartmouth in New Hampshire and Mother went back to work as the secretary at Catherine's new school, leaving me alone at the house most of the days. But caring for my now four-month-old twins kept me busy—sometimes more so than I could manage.

But on an unusually warm day in mid October, I was outside mopping and scrubbing down the front porch. I'd made up the play pin with a soft quilt and had placed it just inside the door and had placed the twins—now six months old—inside of it so that I could hear if they woke up. I was on my hands and knees, my hair tied back in a messy bun, dressed in the overalls that were still stained with pink paint, and I was barefoot as I scrubbed the tiles and the grout in the floor. I was listening to the babies cooing inside and was about to go in and check on them when I heard footsteps coming down the walkway behind me. I backed up, turned, and felt my heart drop.

A blue Ford pickup was parked on the street and coming down the walkway, dressed in dark blue jeans, a gray button-down with rolled-up sleeves, and brown boots, was Emmett McCarthy.

I watched him moving toward me while the adrenaline surged through me. I forgot everything else; how my hair was a mess, I was dressed in oversized, paint-splattered overalls and that I was not wearing any makeup. I forgot everything except that Emmett was here.

He stopped on the opposite side of the bucket I'd filled with soapy water and looked down, his hands in his pockets. "Hey," he said, as casually as a stranger might.

"Hello," I whispered, my pulse drumming everywhere.

"I have something for you." He said as he handed me a white envelope.

I hesitated before I took it from him, not saying anything. I held it but didn't move again, I just stared up at him.

"Please open it,"

I sighed and wiped my hands on my overalls before I looked down and tore open the sealed end of the envelope as he stood over me, watching me. I drew out a few papers and I opened them and began to read them.

Findings for Fact; Conclusion of Law; Order for Judgment; Judgment and Decree.

"What is this?" I asked him after reading the heading and looking up at him uncertainly.

"My divorce papers."

Shock rushed up and almost pushed tears up with it but I bit them back. I dropped my chin and kept my face down to hide the fact that I was fighting the urge to cry. I almost wanted to throw my arms around him, but I didn't. Not after the way he had treated me. Not after what he'd done to me.

"Don't you want them?" I asked him casually, holding them back up for him to take. He furrowed his brow and looked at me, confused. I shook my head. "What am I going to do with them?" I asked as I shook my hand, urging him to take them back. He hesitated, but he finally did.

"I've left her, Rose—"

"So I see,"

"I just had it finalized this morning and I rushed up here as quickly as I could."

"Yes, I can see that, too." I said shortly as I stood and picked up the bucket to pour some of the water on the porch floor before I went back to my mopping.

"I've come to check on you," He said after a short pause. "And make sure you were alright." His voice was soft. I sighed and holding onto the mop handle so tightly my knuckles turned white, my heart ached for him. But I refused to indulge it.

"Well, you could have saved yourself a trip." I said over my shoulder to him. "Because I'm doing just fine. You could've called instead."

Emmett was silent for a few seconds. "And I've come to be with you,"

I sighed again. This time I stopped mopping, but I didn't turn around. "You expect me to take you back after the way you treated me?" I asked, my back on him.

"I thought about you constantly… I could never get you out of my head—"

I turned and held up a hand to stop him. "After everything you've done to me, you really expect to just come back up here and sweep me off my feet?" I fought the urge to roll my eyes. "That may have worked well for you before, but I can assure you than it's not going to happen again."

He stared at me, almost incredulously. "I thought you'd be happy. I didn't come back until my divorce was finalized because I knew that if I came back then I'd never be able to leave. But now I don't have to leave, I can stay here with you and the kids and never go back to Boston again."

"No," I shook my head. "Not this time, Emmett."

"But I—"

"No. You can't just keep coming back into my life and expect to be a part of it. My heart is not a window that you can just climb in whenever it's convenient for you and right back out when it's not. I gotta close it or nothing is ever going to be any different."

"I want it to be different," he said, stepping closer to me and pulling his hands out of his pockets. I suddenly became very aware of the bucket of soapy water in my hands. "I want it to be like what we talked about before. I want to be with you and the kids. I can get a job up here and we can find a house and everything. I want to be there for you, I want to marry you!" he said before he started fumbling around in his left pocket. "Here," he said as he pulled out a little black box. "I brought this for you. I bought it in December and I was planning on giving it to you for Christmas. Please, Rose, please, believe me." He said as he came closer to me and handed the little box to me.

I stared at it, putting the bucket down and I hesitated before I finally opened it. When I did, I gasped and drew my other hand to my lips. It was a Tiffany's platinum engagement ring with a huge diamond the size of my little fingernail and a bunch of much smaller ones lining the band. It must have cost him a couple months' salary. I tilted it this way and that so that it caught the light at just the right angle so it reflected every color of the rainbow in tiny fragments. And my heart longed for him to place it on my finger. But I tore my eyes away from the ring and the promise that it held and I snapped the lid shut, handing it back to him.

"I'm sorry, Emmett," I said as I handed back the ring that I had always dreamed of him giving to me. "But I can't marry you."

He took the ring back and bowed his head, nodding gloomily. "Alright," he said. More cooing came from inside the door and he looked back up, towards the door this time. "Can I… uh…"

I nodded, turning around and going to the door, opening it and holding it open for him. He followed me inside and I led him over to the play pin where Hannah and Gregory were laying peacefully. Gregory was asleep on his back and Hannah lay on her side, both arms flung outward and her feet tangled in the pastel patchwork quilt I'd placed at the bottom of the pin. She had soft curls the color of honey, her eyelashes a shade lighter, and her cheeks were as plump and bright as peaches, a pink pacifier in her mouth. As Emmett studied her, she rolled onto her back and looked up at him. Then turned to me and hung up her arms to be picked up.

"There's my girl," I smiled down at her as I reached into the pin and lifted her out of it. "Hey, sugar. Someone's here to see you," I said just as she turned to look again at the strange man standing beside her mother.

Emmett stared at the baby girl. She was dressed in something that was pink and orange and her backside was puffy. One of her socks had slipped down to reveal the heel of a tiny foot, which I tugged back up as she situated herself comfortably against my chest.

"Look who's here, Hannah banana," I smiled.

"Hi, Hannah," Emmett said quietly to the infant.

Hannah remained as unblinking as a fascinated cat, until I bounced her a couple of times on my arm and rested her face against her downy hair. "It's your daddy, honey."

Mesmerized, Emmett reached and took the little girl, lifting her to eye level where she hung in the air and stared at the top button on his shirt, then at his nose, then his eyebrows, and so on.

"My goodness, you're just a tiny little thing, aren't you?" he said adoringly to the child. I smiled and then turned to Gregory.

"Gregory," I crooned softly. "Hey, sleepyhead, it's time to wake up now. Someone came all the way from Boston to see you,"

Gregory flinched, brought his thumb to his mouth and began sucking but he did not wake up.

"You don't have to wake him up, Rose," Emmett whispered, content to stand and watch him.

"It's alright. He's been napping for two hours already," I stroked my son's soft curls and cooed. "Gre-eeeegory…"

He opened his eyes, shut them again and rubbed his nose with one fist.

Side by side, Emmett and I watched him wake up, making faces, rolling up like an armadillo, and finally coming up on all fours like a shaky bear cub and planting himself down on his bottom before finally looking up at me and Emmett.

"There he is," I smiled, reaching into the pin to lift him out of it and perching him on my arm. He was dressed in a blue shirt with a red sailboat on the front and red shorts. I had dressed them in their summer clothes because it was so warm outside. I introduced him to Emmett in much the same way I had done with Hannah, and pretty soon, he was holding both of them, one on each arm, and talking to them.

He brought Hannah close and touched his dark face to her very fair one, and caught the infant scent of her powdered skin and soft clothing. He smiled and rested his lips upon her silky hair and his eyes closed. My throat seemed to close with his eyes as I watched him with them.

"They're perfect," he said. But as if to prove otherwise, Hannah chose that moment to complain, pushing herself away from Emmett and reaching for me. He handed her over but hovered close as I took her upstairs to change her diaper. Then I changed Gregory's and then went back downstairs. After that, he helped me feed them and he stayed a while to play with them and before I knew it, it was two o'clock.

"I think you'd better leave now," I told him. He looked up at me, surprised. But before he could argue, I added. "Mother will be home soon with Catherine."

"Can't I see Catherine?"

"Not today." I shook my head as I carried the twins one by one back to the play pin. "She doesn't remember much about you except that you left, I need to make sure that she's comfortable with seeing you again before I just throw you at her after school."

He hung his head and nodded. "I understand. I really am sorry, Rosalie. I didn't want to leave her, or you, or the twins. But I promise, I'll never do it again. Ever."

I nodded stiffly and folded my arms over my chest and I led him to the door and I stepped outside with him. "Also, I would appreciate it if you would call ahead of time before just showing up like this," I said.

He nodded. "Alright. I'm sorry, I just… I had to see 'em…" he said.

"I know that. And I understand. Just please don't do it again."

He nodded and said, "I won't."

I watched him turn around and head back up to his truck, his head down. I thought he looked like a whipped dog, walking back with his tail between his legs and his ears down. But I refused to feel bad about it. I turned back toward the house and went inside, closing the door behind me. I listened as he started the engine and I rushed back to the window and watched him drive down the street until he was out of sight.

Author's Note: Okay, it may be a little while before the next update because I'm having a little writer's block. In the original storyline, this was the chapter where they reconciled and got back together and the next chapter would have been the wedding, but since so many people are still so unhappy with Emmett, I'm going to have to draw it out some more. So bear with me. Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated! Review!