Stay Away

The beginning is Naruto manga chapter 359, pages 6-13

"Akatsuki you say? Like hell if I care about that! Don't intefere with my enjoyment of art, unn!" Deidara said, glaring at Kisame, Itachi and Sasori.

"So I really have to make this brat my partner? He's got spunk, but he's the kind that gets himself killed before you know it." Sasori said.

"It's the leader's orders. His abilities will help our cause." Itachi explained.

"You know about my abilities already? Who are you, anyways, unn?" asked Deidara.

"You have been involved in anti-nationalist terrorist cells in surrounding countries,causing a number of explosions, correct? For what reason a rogue ninja as yourself would do as such?" Kisame asked

"Reason? Why would I need one of those? I merely take contracts to blow things up with my art, unn!" Deidara said, smirking.

"Your art?" asked Sasori

"Behold! Aren't you impressed? The product of pursuing refined linework matched with two-dimensinal deformation, unn! Now this is art! But my art doesn't end here! None of my works are static! When they have physical form , they are litle more then models, unn! But this explodes! And with that explosion, it's essence is propelled to greatness, at that monet it becomes the true work of art I intended! And it's in that fleeting moment of grandeur I see true art, unn!" Deidara smiled as he finished his explanation, "ART IS A BANG!" he announced.

"Damn he's annoying." muttered Sasori.

"Is he done yet?" asked Kisame.

"Who knows." Answered Itachi boredly."Enough already, I'll take care of it." Activating his Mangekyo, Itachi looked at Deidara.

"You wanna fight me?" asked Deidara arrogantly.

"If I defeat you, then you'll join Akatsuki." Itachi said with equal arrogance.

"Don't underestimate me, or my art! My ninjutsu is the very pinnacle of artistic accomplishment, unn!" Deidara said, throwing his spider bomb at Itachi, who jumped back out of the way. Doing the 'katsu' seal, the bomb exploded, causing Itachi to jump out of the way again. Looking down, he realized that he was caught by a cattepillar bomb.

"Is that all you've got?" Deidara arrogantly said, smirking.

"You should look at yourself first." Itachi said, also smirking

"That was a close one, you were just about to blow yourself up." Kisame said, smirking.

"I told you, this kid's gonna get himself killed in no time." Sasori mumbled.

"Genjutsu? When did you manage to?" Asked Deidara, confused.

"From the very start. You were bound by illusion the moment you looked into Itachi-san's eyes." Kisame explained.

"You've lost." Itachi said, as Deidara glared at him, and sighed.

"Fine, I'll join Akatsuki, unn." He muttered, pissed off.

"Stupid Itachi." muttered Deidara, as he went towards the table to get himself breakfast.

"Ohayo, Deidara-chan!" Hidan said, Deidara shooting him a dirty look.

"I'm a GUY, Unn!" he said, grabbing an apple, stuffing the fruit in his mouth.

"You don't fucking look like one." Hidan muttered, Deidara throwing the core at the immortals face.

"Shut it, shit. It's Itachi-teme's fault that I'm here, unn!" He complained, glaring at said Uchiha.

"Hn. You agreed to the challenge, so it's technically your choice to join Akatsuki." Itachi said, as Kakuzu held back Hidan from murdering Deidara.

"Stay AWAY from me, Itachi-teme, unn!" Deidara shouted, stomping away, slamming the door shut.

"That was Deidara-san just now, ne?" Konan asked, sticking her head in, observing the scene. Hidan and Kakuzu in a swearing and punching match, Itachi emotionless, Kisame polishing his sword and Sasori making another puppet.

"Hn." Itachi grunted, before replying, "Konan, we came back with Deidara yesterday. Did you inform Leader-sama?"

"Hai, I told Pein-sama that Sasori's new partner is here. Let's all hope that this one isn't a phedophile." She muttered the last part, returning to the room she sharted with Pein.

"Heh, no danger in that." Kisame said loudly, laughing.

"Don't remind me of that Hebi phedopdhile." Itachi muttered, returning to his room.

"It's been three days since Deidara arrived, and he didn't come out of his room!" Konan said after breakfast, looking around.

"Who fucking cares?" Hidan asked, half asleep.

"As long as he doesn't get in my way, I don't care what he does." Kakuzu said, stiffling a yawn.

"Itachi, bring him breakfast." Konan ordered.

"Nani?" Itachi asked, glaring at the kunoichi.

"Because, it's partially YOUR fault that he is not eating. AND I ordered you to, Uchiha." Konan said, and Itachi sighed.

"Hn. Fine." grabbing a plate filled with rice, fruit and a cup of coffee, Itachi knocked on Deidara's door.

"What the hell do you want, unn?" came Deidara's voice.

"Three minutes without oxygen, three days without water, three weeks without food and you die." Itachi said, setting down the food.

"I'm not hungry." Deidara said, glaring at Itachi.

"You're depressed." Itachi stated.

"What makes you say that, unn?" Deidara said, stuffing an apple in his face.

"You could have walked away. No one forced you to join Akatsuki." Itachi said, looking at the blonde.

"Teme." Deidara said, glaring at Itachi. "This place is crap, and they think I'm a woman, unn! I'm a guy! Shall I prove it, unn?"

"I never said that you're a girl. Hidan is a bitch, get used to it." Itachi smirked, and stood up. "Besides, you have a mission. You better be better then Orochimaru."

"I'm not a rapist, unn." Deidara laughed, and looked at Itachi. "You're not half bad, for a stick up his ass."

"You're not half bad for a feminine guy." Itachi said, smirking once again.

"STAY AWAY FROM ME, UCHIHA-TEME, UNN!" yelled Deidara, glaring at the 17-year old as he closed the door.

"Ohayo! I'm Konan, pleased to meet you, Deidara!" Konan said smiling at the newest Akatsuki member.

"Hi Konan-san, unn." Deidara muttered, and he started eating.

"How was your first fucking Akatsuki mission, Dei-chan?" asked Hidan teasingly.

"It was..... interesing, unn." Deidara said, and looked at Hidan. "How was last night with Itachi?"

"I didn't fuck Uchiha, Dei-chan!" Hidan said, glaring.

"Hn. I'm straight." Itachi said simply, and smirked at Deidara. "Unlike yourself."

"What the fuck did you call me, Uchiha? You asshole, stay away from me, UNN!" Deidara said, throwing a clay bomb at Itachi, and slammed the door closed.

"Orochimaru has gained the Sharingan." Zetsu reported.

"Itachi's ototou?" a few people asked, staring at the Uchiha.

"Hn." Itachi's way of saying yes.

"Orochimaru is gonna fucking rape your brother, Uchiha!" Hidan said laughing.

"Heh." Deidara chuckled, and looked at Itachi. "He raped Itachi-teme too, unn?"

"Hn. Who did you rape, Deidara-CHAN? Man or woman?" Itachi replied with a smirk, as the glaring nin punched him.

"Go fuck yourself and stay away from me, UNN!" He said, slamming his door shut.

"Sasori was killed by Haruno Sakura from Konohagakure no Sato and Chiyo from Sunagakure no Sato." informed Pein, via astral projection, as Akatsuki exchanged glances.

"Baabaa and the little girl?" Hidan asked, laughing. "Fucking pathetic. More then Dei-chan having BOTH his arms cut off!"

"Shut up, asshole. That Ichibi was powerful shit, unn." Muttered Deidara.

"Sasori no Danna is dead, unn." he whispered later, as he sniffled, a tear rolling down his cheek. "Fuckin' Konaha bitches." He walked out towards the kitchen

"It's 3 in the moring, why are you up, Deidara?" asked Itachi from the living room.

"I could ask you the same thing, Itachi, unn." Deidara said, grabbing a bottle of water.

"I asked first." Itachi said with a smirk, and Deidara sighed.

"Sasori no Danna is dead, unn ." He said, his azure eyes staring unfocused into thin air.

"You're upset." Itachi stated, red eyes staring at the artist.

"How the hell would you feel if you're closest friend died by the hand of an old wrinkled hag and a little slut, unn?" Deidara angrily demanded, glaring."You're an uncaring stick up his ass, how the hell do you know anything about death, unn?"

"I killed my closest friend to obtain Mangekyo Sharingan." Itachi said, closing his eyes

"Callous bastard, unn. Sasori no Danna was my partner, my best friend, and he's dead." Deidara whsipered, unable to keep from crying. Tears poured out of his eyes, the blonde unsucessfully attempting to stop crying.

"Deidara." Itachi said, grabbing Deidara's shoulder, forcing the other to look at him. "Hn, calm down."

"Nani? You're an asshole, Uchiha, you have no idea how I feel, unn!" Deidara said, glaring through tear filled eyes.

"No idea? Don't you know it hurts that I killed my family, Deidara?" Itachi demanded angrily.

"No, I don't, since I'm not a murderer, Itachi-teme. Stay AWAY From me, unn!" Deidara kicked Itachi, and walked to his room, still crying.

"I can't even if I wanted to." Itachi whispered, walking towards his own room, keeping his mask on until he closed the door. Tears fell out of the Uchiha's eyes as the 20 year old stared at the ceiling.

"Itachi, can I come in, unn?" asked Deidara , opening and closing the door behnd him.

"Hn." Itachi grunted, looking at Deidara who sat beside him.

"Gomenasai for what I said, unn." muttered Deidara, and smirked suddenly. "You're a pretty cool guy, y'know."

"Hn. Where did this suddenly come from?" Itachi asked, hiding his surprise.

"You can't stay away even if you wanted to, unn?" asked Deidara, smiling slightly. "What the hell was that all about?"

"Hn." Itachi grunted, blood red eyes glaring at the wall.

"You like me." Deidara said, laughing. "Knew it, unn!"

"Hn?" Itachi questioned.

"The insults, the genjutsu, the mood swings, you're pretty gay, Itachi, unn." Deidara said smugly, as he stood up. "Ja, pretty boy!"

"What, no teary confessions?" Itachi asked, pushing Deidara up against a wall.

"Nice sarcasm, I don't even like you in anyway, unn. Merely stating facts." Deidara said, as he walked away. "Don't worry, I don't mind gay men."

"You're one yourself. Who was the one who insulted me? The one who dropped his guard near me? You like me back." Itachi said, smirking.

"Heh, you admitted it, unn!" Deidara said, and smiled at Itachi. "Besides, Hidan will have a loud ass field day when he hears this."

"Our little secret." Deidara continued, and kicked Itachi. "Ja Ne, Itachi."

"Ja Ne, Deidara." Itachi said, and pinched himself. "That was completely random."

"Sasuke killed Deidara." Pein said later, as the measely remainder of Akatsuki was shocked.

"Ototou killed Deidara?" Itachi muttered, looking at the rainy sky of Amagakure. "Deidara, waga kawaii mitsukai, gomenasai. Aisheteru.(1)" Itachi whispered, returning to the Akatsuki hideout, his face a cold mask.

"I won't stay away this time." The Uchiha said, smirking slightly. "Dei-chan."

(1) Deidara, waga kawaii mitsukai, gomenasai. Aisheteru. 'It means Deidara, my cute angel, I'm sorry. I love you.'

To SongOfTheDarquePhoenix: Sorry, I didn't wait for the beta! I'm kinda impatient, sorry!

This is a little oneshot I thought of a while ago, but lost my patience waiting for the beta, Sorry!

Review, and tell me what you think, and gimme a request if you want(request info is on my profile, BTW)

-Pika