Title: Beautiful Disaster

Summary: Iruka protects the village from the dark side of Kakashi. Kakashi/Iruka. Dark Fluff…sounds weird, I know, but it works. Warnings: Dark themes, hints of questionable consent.

Many thanks to RaineArilan and AsaiyeShirla for being my amazing Betas.


Iruka shifted the bag of groceries to his other hand as he reached to open the door to his apartment. It had been a long day. It was late. He was tired. He wanted nothing more than to collapse on his bed, then pass out until morning. It seemed like everyone in the village was more on edge these days, even his young students. He couldn't decide if it was the weather or perhaps the looming uncertainty of the future.

Either way, it wasn't good for anyone and something had to break soon. If it didn't, he was worried about the sanity of the whole village. It was a never-ending cycle. The adults were tense and uneasy and then the kids picked up on it from them which in turn made the adults even more short tempered. He was one of the lucky few who got to deal with both the parents and the kids. Ah well, nothing to be done about it now. The school day was long over and he wouldn't have to deal with any of them until tomorrow. He had papers to grade and a book to read once he had dinner.

He jerked his hand back as soon as he brushed the metal door knob. An electric jolt of Chakra stung his fingers. He froze instantly, realizing what that meant. Kakashi had come to him tonight. When the Chakra felt like that, this wasn't one of the good nights. Kakashi wasn't coming for a night with his lover, he was coming to see his shield. This bit of Chakra was Iruka's warning, his one chance to say no. Once he stepped beyond the door and into his apartment, it wouldn't matter what he said. Kakashi would take what he needed and he was certainly strong enough to do it.

Iruka had said no one time, had walked away and not returned home until morning, and Kakashi had let him go, though there was no doubt that he could have forced him to stay. The next few days had been hell to watch as the silver haired ninja struggled more and more with his temper. Kakashi needed these nights to keep him sane and without them it was so hard for him to maintain his kinder nature, especially with Naruto. As much as Iruka cared for the blonde boy, there were times he wanted to shake him out of his selfishness and point out to him how much stress he was putting on other people by his wild antics. It had almost broken Iruka to watch Kakashi for those days and he had never turned away from his door again, no matter how bad things got.

Tonight would be no different.

Iruka pushed the door open, slipped off his shoes as he shut it behind him and locked it with Chakra. No one ever came here beyond Kakashi, but he didn't want to take any chances, not tonight. The apartment was dark and its owner found his way to the kitchen by memory. Even though it was his apartment, it was Kakashi's domain now and if he had wanted to allow Iruka lights, they would have been on already.

He set the bags down on the table and shrugged out of his vest, then turned around. He felt Kakashi and saw the red glow of a single Sharingan from the corner of room. Iruka took a deep breath and tried to relax from what he knew was coming. He couldn't keep the small ball of fear from the pit of his stomach as he walked across the room.

Like a lamb to the slaughter.

The thought came to him, unbidden and unwelcome. Kakashi wouldn't kill him and he'd technically come here willingly, so it wasn't the same thing. He didn't need traitorous thoughts to increase his fear and make him more tense. He was a ninja too. He could keep calm in the face of battle. The battleground might be different than most, and they weren't fighting for land or money, but for something much more precious: Kakashi's sanity.

He stood before the other man now, trying to hold still in the darkness as he waited. The apartment felt almost menacing. It was no longer his home, it was his prison. He always hated this part, from the time he walked in to the time when Kakashi moved for him. Time twisted and he never had any clue how long he waited there.

Pain exploded in the back of his head as he was shoved roughly up against the wall. He gasped, trying to catch his breath and almost choked as Kakashi claimed his mouth roughly. If things started like this, tonight was going to be very bad. Even if he managed to fight off the stronger ninja, he would never make it to the door before he was caught again.

No, no, he wouldn't run. He had chosen to stay. Iruka shuddered, limp and unresponsive as he submitted to Kakashi's aggressive exploration. It didn't seem to bother his partner. This wasn't about sharing, this was about domination and control. A whimper escaped him as a new, sharp pain pierced his lower lip. The tang of copper reached his nose as cold air struck his now bare chest. He heard the sound of his shirt ripping and it was overly loud in this oppressive atmosphere.

His hands crept up to Kakashi's shoulder and he dug his nails into the skin he found there. It anchored him as he was overwhelmed by the onslaught. Most of the time, the feel of the stronger, bigger body pressed against him made him feel safe and protected, but now it made him shake worse and fight to remind himself that Kakashi wasn't an enemy, wasn't really assaulting him. It seemed that tonight was also going to be a fast one as well as a bad one. He felt that his lover had already stripped himself and was quickly putting Iruka in the same state.

A low moan was ripped from his throat as he felt the rough sensation of a hand on his cock. Apparently Kakashi wasn't completely undressed. It wasn't bare skin touching him, but the abrasive feel of those fingerless gloves he wore. The touch was teetering on the line between pleasure and pain, which, knowing Kakashi, was deliberate. A growl answered his moan and the demanding lips left his own, which were now pulsing softly, aching from the abuse. He flinched and shied away with a soft cry as he felt teeth along his collarbone and shoulder.

Iruka arched his back, tilting his head back to expose his throat more fully to those sharp teeth. Submission, that was the name of the game. Submit and it was a little less painful. The hand stroking him sped up as well. It only stopped when Iruka was fully hard. He didn't understand why Kakashi always insisted he be aroused for the torture nights, but it wasn't like he had any say. This was the former ANBU's show. By now, his chest burned in a trail of bleeding bite marks. Kakashi grabbed him by the arm and spun him around and shoved him towards the bedroom. He winched at the painful position of his twisted limb and moved quickly to where he was silently directed.

He climbed onto the bed, on his hands and knees, trying to stop the violent shaking so he could support his own weight. Part of him was glad that this was progressing so quickly tonight. The slow torture nights were the worst. Even if this was more violent than normal, it seemed it would at least be over soon and there was no evidence yet of any kind of blades or other weapons in tonight's session.

He cried out again as fingernails dug into his sides and yanked down his body. Teeth were soon added to his back, starting from his neck and working their painful way downward. He almost lost the battle and sank onto his elbows, but managed to somehow find the strength to not collapse. His mind was awash with pain and fear with no room for logical thought, no room for any thought but the deep instincts of self-preservation that was screaming at him to run, to get away from the predator stalking him.

Everything froze as coolness, almost icy compared to the burning pain on the rest of his skin, touched the base of his spine and slipped downwards. One finger slipped into him, twisting to coat him inside. It was such a contrast from the hot pain and abusive touches that his mind almost shut down. Even in the darkest of these nights, Kakashi would never forget in the back of his mind who he had under him, who he was hurting, or at least that's what the younger man hoped to believe. Iruka hadn't dared to ask about that, if it was part of Kakashi's normal routine or if he really did it because he couldn't forget that he wasn't torturing some captive, but with his lover. This wouldn't be pleasant by any stretch of the imagination, but he wouldn't take Iruka dry. Barely prepped yes, but not dry.

The smaller man tried to remember to not tense up at the intrusion, but he couldn't think enough to focus on that. His body wasn't listening to his mind at all and it was very much afraid of any touch bringing pain. Kakashi slipped a second digit into him, shoved them deep and brushed against Iruka's prostate expertly, causing him to cry out sharply and press back against the intrusion. A dark, satisfied chuckle reached him from somewhere above him and the fingers were removed.

Iruka didn't have time to tense again before he was breeched again, this time by Kakashi's cock. One smooth motion and new tongues of fire screamed up his body and out his mouth. Fingers gripped his hips in bruising holds as the older man began his relentless pace. Cries of pain were pushed from Iruka's lips with each thrust. Tears streamed down his face and his fingers ripped holes in the sheets.

How long this went on, he never could say. Finally, the end was in sight as one of Kakashi's hands left his hips and reached around to stroke Iruka in the same rough manner as he had earlier. It wasn't more than a moment or two before the smaller man was finished, screaming a completion that was more pain than pleasure. Kakashi followed a moment later and collapsed on top of Iruka. The weight was too much for his abused arms and he was crushed into the bed and passed out from all the pain.


When he came to, he was warm and was blissfully free of the fire that had plagued him. He was being cradled gently and he was being moved somewhere. Soft sounds reached his ears but he couldn't for the life of him figure out who was talking or what they were saying. The movement stopped and he was resting against something soft.

Iruka opened his eyes to see he was in his own bed, being very gingerly tucked in by his love. He frowned as he realized that the low sounds he had heard moments ago belonged to Kakashi. Everything that had happened that night came flooding back to him as he fully woke up. He studied them both, trying to see if all was well. Kakashi was wearing a pair of dark sleep pants and he looked all cleaned up. Iruka took stock of himself. He wasn't in any pain and had been dressed in both sleep pants and a shirt. His skin felt clean. Kakashi must have cleaned them both up. There wasn't any hint of the blood or fear that had been in this room before.

The Jonin left the room for a moment and returned with a bowl of something steaming. He kneeled on the floor next to the bed, a slightly haunted look in his eyes, and he started to reverently feed Iruka the ramen that he had apparently made. Iruka managed to eat about a third of the bowl before he gave up. Leaning forward, he gently took the bowl from Kakashi and set it aside.

"Come to bed, koi," he said softly and shifted the blankets aside in invitation.

The older man shook his head, and slowly stood. He collected the bowl of ramen and walked back out of the room. Iruka soon heard sounds of water and the gentle clink of the bowl being set on the counter to dry. He sighed and waited. What was taking him so long? It was the quiet noise of a zipper that made Iruka realize that Kakashi wasn't planning on coming back. He climbed out of bed quickly, stumbling as his muscles protested any kind of movement. Grabbing the doorframe, he took in the sight of a fully dressed Kakashi heading for the door.

"Kashi," he said softly. The older man stiffened and almost hesitantly turned around to look at him with his one unhidden eye. Iruka straightened and slowly made his way across the living room to stand in front of his lover. Physically, the Copy Ninja didn't move away from him, but the sense of retreat was there all the same.

Without saying a word, Iruka reached forward and gently unzipped the vest and slid it off. Next came the gloves. Both were tossed carelessly on the floor. Very carefully, the younger man undid the forehead protector and the mask that hid his love's face, then kissed him softly, first on the lips, then each cheek. Forgiven. Kakashi's mouth was forgiven for hurting him. He had to pause a moment to make his arm muscles obey him. He pulled off the shirt that had been under the vest, then undid the pants and pushed them to the floor as much as he could without bending over. He ran his hands down Kakashi's arms. Iruka captured both hands in his and brought them up to his mouth to kiss each one for their part in what had happened.

Gently tugging on those hands, he urged Kakashi to step out of the pants and ever so slowly coaxed him back to the bedroom. Iruka kept him moving until they reached the bed. He paused and leaned in to give his lover one last kiss before making him lay down. He slid in next to him and Kakashi inched over towards the wall a bit to make room. Iruka pulled the blankets up around them both and twined his arms and legs with his partner's.

He started to run his hands though the silver strands of hair, a gentle, and what he hoped was a soothing, manner. Ever so slowly, he felt the tension slip away from Kakashi. He knew he had won the fight when Kakashi buried his face in Iruka's shoulder. Iruka simply held him, continuing to stroke his hair in soothing strokes. Eventually, the older man slept.

"A ninja protects, koi," Iruka whispered to the sleeping man in his arms, "He stands between the darkness that consumes. He gives his life, if needed, to protect the innocent." He smiled and pressed a soft kiss on Kakashi's forehead and snuggled in closer, curled around him to guard him in the night. "I'll protect you from the darkness, Kashi. Don't be afraid."