A/N – Ok, so I was talking to HuddyRocks, and we came up with the idea of a funny story when all the characters are OOC. Complete crackfic, and has no real point to it at all – enjoy!

Disclaimer – I do not own House M.D. It all belongs to David Shore and Fox.

~Chapter 1~

House wore an unusual smile when he arrived at work one Monday morning. Humming a familiar tune, he made his way through the busy clinic. He was wearing his usual outfit, jeans, t-shirt, and jacket, and seemed to have an uncommon skip in his step on his way to the elevator.

Once he reached the fifth floor, he had gone from humming, to singing the kiddie tune.

"If you're happy and you know it clap your hands!" He sang as he paused in the hallway, leaned his cane against the wall, and clapped his hands up high in the air, loudly. Grabbing his cane, he walked a few more steps before he paused.

"If you're happy and you know it clap your hands!" House repeated the order and actions as he continued towards his office.

"If you're happy and you know it, and you really wanna show it; if you're happy and you know it, clap your hands!" A few people looked into the hallway and shook their heads as they mumbled, 'Here we go again'.

Cuddy sat in her office alone as she re-read the lab results. No…no, no, no, no, no, NO! She thought to herself as a tear threatened to travel down her cheek. She wiped away the growing tear, as she stood up, anger building up inside of her.

Trying to calm herself down, she breathed in and out deeply just like her psychiatrist told her. That didn't help.

She quickly stormed out of her office, her new assistant looking at her worriedly.

"LIFE SUCKS!" She screamed at the top of her lungs as she ran around the clinic franticly. The crowded clinic froze, as people stepped aside for the Dean of Medicine to rush past as she flailed her arms in the air, screaming unrecognizable words.

They all watched as Cuddy ran up to a pregnant woman and screamed, "You had better not be getting an abortion! If you are, oh, you will be DEAD!" The young woman's eyes grew big as she muttered, 'I would never think of doing such a thing!'

Cuddy ignored her as she noticed a little boy walk into the clearing. She looked into his eyes. They were a familiar deep blue, "Jason, honey come here, please," The mother called out as she tried to push past the crowd of people.

"You'd better listen to your mother! Do you know what she went through while she waited for the nine months to be over? Morning sickness, headaches, stretch marks, little boy, the list goes on and on. LISTEN TO YOUR MOTHER!" Cuddy shouted as she ran past him to the safety of her office.

"Don't mind her, everybody! She just had another miscarriage. This kind of incident has occurred before, and she is seeking help for her…problems," The head nurse informed as she stood up from behind her cluttered desk.

"I heard that!" Cuddy called as the clinic froze once again, "Nurse Brenda, YOU'RE FIRED!" She shouted as she slammed her office doors shut.

A few minutes went by before Cuddy came back into the clinic, and found Nurse Brenda still standing behind the main desk.

"Didn't I just fire you four minutes ago? Well, maybe you didn't understand, so let's try it again. You are fired! Estás despedida! Vous êtes tiré!" Cuddy said loudly as she stormed away from the nurse's station. Wilson, who had just gotten off the elevator, had witnessed the whole thing. He was wearing a tie-dye shirt over black pants, a million multicoloured necklaces, and a hot pink piece of fabric tied around his head.

"Chill, dude! We all need to live in, like, peace and harmony!" Wilson called out as he grabbed her right hand, and placed a beautiful daisy in the palm of her hand. As he walked away, Cuddy looked at the daisy and cursed. Dropping the flower to the ground, she stepped her black heel on it, and twisted it around so the daisy lay dead on the floor.

She smirked as she dusted her hands off with her skirt, and walked briskly to her office.

A/N – hehehe, so I hope you liked it! More chapters to come :)