You Belong With Me

By: emeraldgrl

Chapter Ten : Playing House

It's weird how time passing can take you further from the awkward situations you used to feel surrounded by. Suddenly, it's as if the memory fades. You know what happened, you know the other person knows what happened, but you just, forget.

You choose to not remember – you push the memories back. I guess it is how you can pass by someone in the hall that you used to share secrets and paint each other's toenails, but now you don't even really acknowledge with more than a nod. It's the effect of time in its strongest form. They say time heals all, but I'm not so sure if time is healing, or just… distancing.

Time is just another word for ignorance. It is how you can also call someone a bad name one day accidentally to their face, then ignore it the next time you see each other, and suddenly it never happened. You know from that day on that the other person knows exactly what you think of them, and they know that everyone really thinks they're a freak, or whatever it was that you called them. If time teaches anything, it's that if you ignore it, then it goes away.

I guess if I were to describe my current mood though it would have to be thoroughly frustrated. How do we let this pretend ignorance continue? It's been more than a month since Edward gave me that little…"proposition" and my best friends and I decided that we would make a list to teach Edward how perfect I am for him.

A month of ignorance.

We hadn't discussed anything about anything, to be quite honest. It was like one morning I woke up and it was like the time in my life before Tanya. Edward was my best friend, we'd never kissed, I hadn't been through a ringer in emotions, and no big scheme was set in motion to convince Edward of anything.

Thanksgiving and Christmas both passed without any life-altering events in between. Midterm exams came and went. James and Tanya, who had seemed to both take on a different role to me, were back to the normal (as normal as they can get at least). It was all very frustrating.

I didn't catch Edward look at me with those irresistible bedroom eyes and I didn't even imagine making a move myself on Edward. Okay, well, I certainly imagined, but it was as if suddenly I had forgotten how.

I was about to boil over.

When Alice, Rosalie, and I got together there was no talk of the list we had made or of any plans we had to act them out. I thought about mentioning it, but then two days had passed, then two weeks. I think it was easier to ignore the plans than actually have the guts to try and tell the other two I really wanted to try.

Ignoring is much simpler than actually taking the risk. All of this, of course, did nothing for my self-esteem. I began to wonder if I had fallen into some alternate universe where everyone had forgotten about two months' worth of events. Then I began to wonder if I had made up the whole ordeal.

Then again, it was much easier to get over that, because there was no way I would ever forget the feel of Edward Cullen's lips on mine. Of my best friend's hands roaming my body. Of loving him so strongly and then getting to actually touch him like I had wanted to for so long.

It was sometime in the middle of the first week back to school for the second semester that I stopped ignoring all of this. I spent the whole of that day thinking about what my life used to involve. Feeling Edward's body next to mine (and not in the nine or so measly hours where he's dead asleep next to me in my bed) was something I realized I could not so easily give up.

Then came the thinking. The constant mind-wandering as to how something like this could happen. How it is that people can just forget the things that used to be so common to them? Luckily, Edward had always been my best friend and we'd never fallen apart. But it happens. Best friends can share their innermost feelings and then two years later not even know if they still sleep with their favorite stuffed animal. It happened to Jessica and Lauren.

I guess thinking about other people's situations made me more scared for my own. I had already allowed a freaking month to pass – there was no way I was letting a thing like time make it two whole years. So I was frustrated because no one else was even realizing this. I wouldn't stand for it anymore.

I caught up with Rosalie before she entered the cafeteria for lunchtime, knowing she came from the same entrance I did and that she was my best bet for getting to the bottom of this ASAP. She always told it like it was. I don't even think Rosalie knows what ignorance means.

"Rose!" She looked startled as I popped from seemingly out of nowhere, and then coolly arched one eyebrow as I'm sure my face looked frightening. I think I had let myself chew these particular thoughts a tad too long. "Aren't we going to buy lingerie or something?"

Maybe instead delving too deep into the ex-best friendship of Lauren and Jessica, I should've thought a little bit more on what I was going to say to Rose.

She laughed, of course, and cheerfully linked her arm through mine, continuing on her way to our table. "I am always up for buying new lingerie, Bella. But if you're referring to our list to make Edward crazy for you, which I'm sure you are because Alice said it would take you about this long, you'll have to ask her. She's the one who told me not to mention it at all until you bring it up."

I was sure my mouth dropped open. Now, Alice was not a psychic by any means, I mean this isn't That's So Raven or something. And no, I'm not a closet Disney Channel fan. Okay, so I am a little – but really only a tiny little smidgen, I promise.

Edward came up on Rosalie's other side before I had a chance to say more. "Hello ladies," He smiled that crooked grin and threw his arm around Rose's shoulder. I would say I was a bit jealous, but I noticed he'd been doing this for what I am now deeming as the Month of Ignorance.

He had stopped almost all physical contact with me. Before, he would've done the same thing but to me, and no one would have said anything. But now, he was almost going out of his way to be completely oblivious to what once used to be "special" touches to me. I took it as Edward's way of putting back up the best friend barriers that had crumpled because of that first kiss on his porch.

Now that I had finally ventured out of IgnoranceLand, I took it as a stupid sign that Edward was still safely whistling away in the confines of it. I glared at him and unlocked my arm with Rose's to hurry ahead. Childish, maybe, but he was the one thinking that if he threw his arm around Alice or Rose it would cancel out the times he had thrown his arm around me.

"I need to talk to you after school," I hissed at Alice, ignoring the others who had arrived at our usual table. As she grinned up at me from a confused Jasper's lap, I only narrowed my eyes and proceeded to do that thing where you point at your eyes with two fingers then point back at the other person's, as if to say I'm watching you.

Which really was an empty threat, because it meant nothing. Alice's latest underhand scheme had completely flown over my head as always, and I was no step closer to finding out why she had dismantled the plans I had started to get Edward to discover what he was missing.

The rest of lunch, and the day, for that matter really was unnecessary besides two things. The first was during said lunch where Edward was convinced I was pissed off at him once again, and so anxiously ran his hands through his hair what must've been a hundred times. I'm guessing he hadn't decided if he was supposed to "remember" about our kisscapades or if I was upset over something else he had done.

I chose to ignore him, because really, it was drama I didn't need. That second, however, James seemed to wake up out of his own IgnoranceLand because it was as if he suddenly remembered my existence. So very, very unfortunately for me.

"Hello, Bella, baby, long time no see." His voice was smooth, not in the velvety way Edward's was, but more of the smooth like ice sliding down glass. Cold and cutting; dangerous as ever.

"We had this class yesterday, and the day before, and oh, wow, the day before." I said dryly, trying to recall why I had been so threatened by him more than a month ago. He really did seem ridiculously harmless. Yeah, he gave me the creeps, but this wasn't some crazy movie script that called for him trying to "off" me in the next scene.

"Oh, don't play that way, babe, you know I just had to take care of some of the other girls for a bit. Don't get jealous," I think he was referring to a certain Jane who he'd been just about horizontal with, not that Mrs. C noticed. His lips twisted into something that might've resembled a smirk if his mouth were more attractive.

"Oh, gosh, okay, I won't get jealous." Still as dry as one's voice could get, but my sarcasm was being completely lost on the Neanderthal next to me who looked quite pleased with himself as he leaned back in his computer chair and looked me up and down.

"Baby, the things I would do to you –"

"If I didn't want to throw up every time I think about even touching you." I cut him off through gritted teeth; I didn't want him thinking that my current shiver was from pleasure but was actually from a very resonant sickness. "If you even could give me an eighth of the pleasure that you say you could give me. If you could stop calling me baby!"

I have mentioned how I hate this endearment, right? It just sounds so demeaning or fake.

Something passed over James's face for an instant, something scary that made me remember that ferocity that had terrified me just that month ago, but then the bell rang. Thankfully, he scowled, grabbed his bag, and left, but it made me question my next move for a bit.

"Bella?" Edward's voice grabbed my attention, and spurred me back into motion. As I was grabbing my bag, I thought I might casually bring up the topic of James with Edward, might mention how my heart had stopped in those few seconds James's face had been deadly scary, but then I was facing a sulking Edward. "Are you mad at me?"

I was thrown once more, then realized he meant my earlier glare at his innocent actions with Rose. I laughed, shaking my head, liking an Edward that almost seemed afraid of my temper. In the past he had only prodded my rage further along, liking that I acted "like a cute kitten with its claws out" (his words, not mine). Now, though, he seemed terrified that if he made the slightest mistake I would push him out of my life again.

"No, actually a little pissed at Alice, but nothing to worry about." I have to admit it made my insides warm when his face flooded with relief. I can't help it – my favorite Edward is happy Edward.

"Oh, well, good." I was a bit surprised when he threw his arm around me, leading us to my truck. "Listen, I know, you said, what you said. I mean, before." He started off looking me in the eyes, and then he started stuttering over his words so he looked straight ahead. It was confusing – what the hell was he going on about? "But, I, I wanted to do something. I mean, say something."

"Edward, you realize I have no idea what you are talking about, right?" I giggled, wrapping my arm around him as well. Internally, I felt a giddiness that we were touching again. His words were kind of lost on me, because I could only think about the fact that with our arms wrapped around each other I could smell his incredible scent so well it was as if my nose was right up against the side of his throat.

"Yeah," He smiled when I giggled. He paused as if he wanted to say more, a kind of brief sadness entering his eyes, before his gaze fixed once more on my frozen smile. "Yeah," He said again, his eyes brightening as he squeezed my shoulder lightly.

At this point I was unlocking my truck and climbing in, so unfortunately our arms had to release each other, but it was a small price to pay. "I'm stopping by Rosalie's real quick, to, uh, drop something off," What? "But, um, then I'm going home. I'm going to cook a meal. You can come, of course."

Screw the girls, I could show off my spectacular tricks that Edward liked, with or without their help. So tonight, I would win the way to my man's heart through his stomach. That is how grandmothers recommend doing it anyways, right?

The thing was, I cooked a lot of nights for Charlie and myself, even Edward had often eaten dinner I had cooked. This would be the first time I actually invited him before hand though – which is why I'm sure it sounded awkward. I mean, I didn't want him to think anything was up.

"I was, well, I was going to stop by Jasper's to do homework together," I think he realized that tonight's dinner was something different too, because he seemed unsure as to whether Jasper and him had study plans or not. "What are you making?"

"Lasagna!" It was out of my mouth too quickly to sound remotely normal; that paired with the fact that my lasagna was Edward's favorite dish, must've been a huge sign that tonight was not at all like the times I had cooked for him before. Oh, God. I was terrible at this.

"Of course, then," His crooked grin was enough to wash away the awkwardness, and as he looked up at me from beneath his lashes (I was seated in my very large truck at this point), I felt the air change. In the span of a second, something palpable had charged the air around us.

I sucked in a breath as I saw the understanding of whatever this was in his eyes too. "Okay," Call it a weird reflex, but my body had done something else I hadn't told it to, it had slammed my door shut, almost slamming Edward as well, but he had dodged it.

His eyebrows furrowed and then relaxed, and I couldn't say a goodbye because I didn't want to look even more stupid. I honestly don't know what's wrong with me. It's like my muscles have a mind of their own. I could only offer a meek wave before he shook his head amusedly and set off for his Volvo and I set off for Rosalie's.

"Rose's house. Now." I told Alice after she had picked up my call halfway through the first ring. Then, calling Rose, I said a simple "We're coming over", assuming she knew when and who. Which, of course, she did, seeing as how she was waiting with an open door when I arrived moments later.

Alice pulled up only shortly after I did, and we all uniformly hustled into the house, and then Rose's bedroom. I started just as soon as Rose shut the door behind her. "Okay, since you two good-for-nothings are content to just let me struggle with the list alone, I've already taken the first step to start with my cooking for him idea. So I invited him to dinner tonight, thank you very much."

"Oh, you're ready!" Alice squealed, winking at Rose, who lounged on her bed and gave a quick, loud, laugh. "Now we can for sure start our plan, which I like to call Make Edward Pant, although really it should be called Make Edward Realize that he Loves Bella Hello You Idiot! But M-E-P is better than M-E-R-L-B-H-Y-I because we can also just call it MEP. I'll be quiet because now I'm rambling."

I think I might've sputtered my next few sentences. In fact, I'm sure I did. "Wait a minute… You cannot take the credit for my action, Mary Alice… Pant? Not only do I think it's disturbing that you picked that verb, but the fact that you picked it for your brother… Now hold up! You guys had forgotten all about MEP for the past month!"

Don't ask me why I just went along with Alice and called it MEP.

"Really, Bella, how long have we all known each other, you don't think Alice has some kind of brilliant explanation for her actions?" Rose asked, as she now hung upside down from the edge of her bed, moving her face around with her finger as she held up a mirror with her other hand.

"Bellie Bells, darling, I thought if you took any longer, I might have to just forget about the whole thing." Alice sighed dramatically, all the while with a grin on her face.

I just gaped at the pair of them. "Can one of you please explain what the heck is going on? Did you two have some kind of secret meeting where you decided you would momentarily forget about MEP until I came raging at you?"

"Exactly!" Alice looked far too delighted for her own good. "We had to be sure it was you making the decision Bella. We had to make sure you were really ready. We definitely need to be the ones who craftily orchestrate the entire MEP process, but it had to be your decision to get the ball rolling in the first place. And you couldn't just tell us you were ready, you had to actually do something about it.

Why do you think it took you more than a month to finally get frustrated enough to start the plans without us? You weren't ready before, trust me. Everything between you and my brother had just happened and there was not enough time for you to truly adjust. Now you've come to terms with what has happened, I think anyways, and there's no awkward tension between the two of you lying over your heads. You can really start from scratch and get past the whole Tanya thing."

I sat down hard on the bed, stunned. Was Alice right? I mean, it had taken me a whole month to finally be spurred into action not only with Edward, but with my best friends too. I looked at Rosalie, who was now looking at me too, and then stared agape at Alice.

"I know, she's a sneaky little bugger, isn't she?" Rose asked, who I noticed was now staring at Alice with a smirk. Alice might've been glowing under the attention and silent praise if it hadn't been for her business face to come to her.

"I have to admit I wasn't really expecting you to invite Edward to dinner tonight though, of all nights!" Alice suddenly appeared with a notepad and pen in her hands. "You silly Bella, we have so much to do now! Please tell me you'll have time to cook a fabulous meal and look like a fabulous meal yourself too. And please tell me Charlie is going to be out of the house."

I think my face draining of color was enough to tell her that I wasn't known to be the expert planner of the group. "I can make the meal." I said stupidly.

Rose was the first to jump to action. "First you need to take a super quick shower with the fabulous bath washes and scents thanks to à la Rose, and Alice and I will get an outfit together for you when you get out. Shave with the extra razor under the cabinet- go!"

Well, thank the Lord for fabulous friends is all I have to say.

…

Heading back home from Rose's, I began to think of how to get Charlie out of the house as well as not question my outfit. After the quickest shower known to mankind, I had been shoved into one of Rose's 'club' dresses, meaning while it was tight on her curves and short on her mile-long legs, it fit my minimal curves just right (in fact, brought them out a bit in all honesty) and became an acceptable length on my short height, but still highlighted my own long legs (for my size at least). Then hair by Rose, makeup by Alice, and ta-da! ready to go.

I called Jacob, thinking he would know how to lure Charlie from the house. "Jake, no, don't talk, please just listen and help." I said as he immediately started talking loudly in my ear from the phone. He sighed, sounding annoyed, so I took that as my cue to continue. "Billy, what is Billy doing?"

"I have no idea, Bella, probably watching television in the living room, why?" He huffed, really being no help at all with that kind of attitude.

"Ack, never mind! See you later!" I hung up without waiting for his response, realizing an even better candidate to lure Charlie from our house than Billy. A now seven-year widowed Sue Clearwater.

"Hello?" She answered cheerfully.

"Hello!" I all but shouted at her, I was now parked in my driveway, feeling like I was in a mad rush, even though I knew I had plenty of time to make the lasagna. "Sorry, it's Bella Swan. I have a favor to ask… You see, I really love cooking for my dad, but recently he's been going on and on about your special fish dish. I don't know what it's called and I know I can't make it as good as you can…"

"Well, I mean the two of you could come over, and I could teach you how to make it, and the Charles could eat with us?" I was stunned for a moment, unsure as to whether it was the sweet eagerness in her voice when she realized Charlie might be coming over, or whether it was the fact that I had never heard my dad called Charles before. It was… weird.

"Yeah, I really would love to, but I, uh, have a ton of homework to do tonight. I really can't go anywhere and I was just going to pop in a microwave dinner, but I feel like it really is so unfair to Charlie to make him eat junk like that when he has been going on and on about how it's the most delicious thing in the world." If Sue knew me any better, she would know I was lying so badly my nose was sure to have grown. Luckily, she didn't.

"Well, you know, he could always come over and I could make it for him. I mean, if he wants to come over that is. Be sure to warn him the kids are out though, so if he, um, is uncomfortable with just me for company. Just tell him to be over any time before seven, if he wants to that is." She said so shyly, I almost melted for Charlie. Don't get me wrong, your dad dating – doing anything of that caliber – is so wrong, but the two of them were so obviously smitten with each other it was kind of adorable.

"Oh, that is so great! I'm sure he'll be thrilled! Thank you so much!" Knowing I had succeeded made me breathe a sigh of relief, so I started to walk up the front walk, doing a sort of dance, which was not exactly the smartest thing to do considering I was wearing heels. (Rosalie scoffed when I pleaded for her to borrow one pair of flats – I realized she was offended I even thought she owned a pair of flats.)

"Dad! I talked to Sue; she wants you to come over for dinner tonight!" I yelled from the entryway, so excited that even though my entire plan was last minute everything was working out. He was in front of me in six seconds flat. I almost wobbled on my heels just from the force at which he rushed to me.

"Tonight?" He asked, trying to look nonchalant, and yet already grabbing his jacket.

"Yes, she said she wanted to make you her fish dish – I forget what it's called. Also, the kids are out, if that's alright." He bit his lip to try to hide his smile, and I wondered briefly if I had picked up that trait from him. "You should go though; I'm only going to be hardcore studying tonight probably."

"Yeah, you're right, I probably should go. It would be rude to turn down her offer, right?" He twisted the lapels of the jacket in his hands, trying to pass this whole thing off as my doing – although, I guess technically it really was all my doing.

"Exactly, go!" I couldn't help laughing at the smile on his face; he looked like a little kid. "Really, you should go now too since she's all alone. I think it would be nice to keep her company while she cooked the two of you dinner." I might be disturbed later if I find out that I set my father up on his first date since my mother.

"Right, yes," He passed by me, and then seemed to realize what I was wearing. He opened his mouth and I desperately tried to keep my face blank, but then he must've thought better of it, seeing as this was quite the deal for him, so said instead, "Stay out of trouble; bye Bells."

"No problem, have fun, Dad," I winked, knowing he'd be less occupied with thoughts of my own scheming, and sure enough he turned red, before half-heartedly waving and heading to his cruiser.

I closed the door and actually did a little dance. It was surprisingly easy; I guess the more you wear heels, the easier they get to wear. Hmm, who knew wearing heels was something you learned? Regardless, I should still probably exchange them for a pair of my own flats.

However, glancing at the clock, I instead decided to head to the kitchen and start on my famous lasagna. I figured Edward might show up anytime in the next few minutes to hour, so I should actually have dinner going since that was the whole point of task one of MEP.

I got my lasagna (luckily, having all the usual ingredients around, with just a few unnoticeable adjustments considering it was made from scratch) in the oven just as Edward arrived. He must've let himself in because as I was getting ingredients out for the quick salad I planned to make, I heard his voice from the hall. "Bella?"

"In the kitchen," His nervous sounding voice had only made my own voice nervous. I busied myself with carefully cutting the tomatoes, and only briefly glanced up before returning my gaze down to my work. "Hello, Edward,"

"Hi," I felt his stare and suddenly didn't know what to do with myself. That tension that had suddenly taken over the air at my truck suddenly filled the air here as well. It was maddening.

"I-I'm wearing this because when I went over to Rose's they played Bella Barbie on me," I said lamely, not knowing why I felt I needed to give the excuse. I felt incredibly stupid – why had I allowed myself to make such a big deal out of the whole thing?

"I like it," Edward had come around the counter at this point, and I felt his breath across my ear in the most delightful way. I told myself to breathe and to watch my knife; I did not need a bleeding finger to ruin this moment. "They even got you in heels," I felt his touch at my elbow at the same time his mouth grazed just under my ear.

"Yeah, you get used to them, you know?" I asked stupidly, as if he would know anything about wearing heels. "I can see how those spies can run in them in the movies. It's like after walking, running is easy. You got to start with a crawl, like a baby." What?

"Isa…bella," I was all too pleased when he decided to stop my insane rambling. Then again, I was probably more pleased by the fact that his nose was still running along my neck and jaw area. I bit my lip, unsure of what action to take, not even noticing I had stopped chopping the instant he had touched me.

He was standing unbelievably close, and yet not actually kissing me. Besides his hand at my elbow and his nose at my neck, he had not made any further attempts at making the first move. I was unsure if I liked this or not. Besides the internal debate about what this meant in the best friendship – I was also having the internal debate about what Alice's and Rose's decision on me kissing him had been.

Did they say I could? Oh, God, why couldn't I remember just this one thing? I really, really wanted to kiss him.

"You look really good," Edward commented, his lips right at my ear. I realized I had started to hold my breath, so I released in a big sigh, embarrassed by the sound that came with it. A kind of low gasp with the beginning of a moan, which made my face flush ridiculously red.

I think it spurred a different kind of reaction in Edward though, because suddenly he was touching me everywhere. He had moved so that he was wrapped around me from behind, his front plastered to my back, towering over my form, pressing against me in a purely instinctual way. I just about lost my mind.

"I, you," I muttered idiotically, pressing myself back into him, grabbing his wrists where his hands gripped the counter on either side of me. I was shocked to find a growing hardness at the small of my back, wandering how this all was happening. "Edward,"

We moved no further, just froze pressed solidly to each other, breathing surprisingly loud considering we hadn't really done anything.

Unbidden, a certain article from one of the Cosmos struck my mind. A new one talking about how some women can think their way to an orgasm. With maybe a few dirty words and the pure power of their mind they could find a release. In the middle of my kitchen, I was suddenly terrified I was going to come and Edward was going to be horrified.

"Bella, where did you go?" His voice came at my ear, sounding deeply amused, until I jumped lightly, grinding into a certain part of his anatomy. He groaned low, his mouth opened right against the side of my face, and the only thing I could think was that Edward was right there behind me, doing whatever it was we were doing.

"Edward, I've been thinking," I shifted my hips once more, wondering where this brazen attitude was coming from, where these words were coming from. "About your… proposition," No, obviously, I wasn't thinking. What the hell was I talking about? There was no way I would ever enter into the friends with benefits deal!

The doorbell.

The glorious, awful, wonderful, terrible doorbell. Edward and I immediately jumped apart, as if we had actually been going at it against the kitchen counter. Although… no! What the hell was wrong with me? I was induced into an Edward brain-dead cloud.

"I'll get it," I said to no one really, adjusting the dress that hadn't really moved. I opened the front door to a crazy person. Leah, of all people, burst in, glaring at me and giving the typical high school 'stank face' at my what might actually be considered slutty dress.

"Are you with him, Swan?" She hissed between her teeth, scaring the living daylights out of me. For one irrational moment I was sure she meant Edward and I and wondered if she knew what we had just been doing. "Where is Jacob?"

Then of course, as my brain was coming back to me, I realized she could care less about Edward and me, and only wanted to be sure Jake wasn't over her doing what Edward had just done to me. But really, that was quite rude considering I'd never given anyone the impression that I was romantically interested in Jacob Black.

"Leah, no – what? Jake's not here, I promise." I meant to sound reassuring, but I think my whore panting, red face, and the fact that I called him by Jake must've said something opposite to her. I looked to Edward for help, but he was only trying not to laugh, and tried to hide what I realized must be an erection by the way he was awkwardly standing near the coats on the coat rack.

"You listen to me, Swan, I don't care what you do with every other boy in town," She cast an obviously distasteful glance at Edward, who would've been offended, I'm sure, if he hadn't burst out laughing. "But Jacob Black is mine, you got that?"

"I- You can have him!" I basically sputtered, astounded by what was the most committal phrase to ever leave Leah's lips. My hands were now up in a gesture of surrender, for a reason I had no explanation for. In case you can't tell, Leah scared the crap out of me. "I mean, not that you need me to give him to you… He's been yours all along – I don't want him, honestly!"

Her scowl became even fiercer at my inane rambling, and I could feel myself getting more tongue-tied. Then, a sniff. Leah's face cleared immediately, her nose up in the air, (much like a dog to be quite honest). In my current state of mind- terrified- I wondered if she could smell traces of Jacob throughout the house, and if I was about to be condemned for hiding him somewhere against his will.

I blame this current brain fog on Edward, hands down.

"Is that lasagna?" She asked, very sweetly might I add, grinning at me. Talk about bi-polar, seriously. "You know, Swan, I thought it was weird when you called Jacob for a three second conversation about Billy's whereabouts, and imagine my surprise when not to long after I get a call from my mother to stay out of the house because your dad is coming over. At this point I'm already on my way back home – this coincidental ridding of Charlie and calling Jacob? You're planning something."

My face burst into flames, not because she was right about my plans with Jacob, but because she had just shared my not-so-secret-anymore scheming with Edward as well. Regardless of the awkward invitation, the sexy attire, there was no way he could not know that the whole thing was some kind of setup. Fuck my life.

"Add that hideous blush to the fact that my mother clearly mentioned you having to study all night, means that this whole thing is some kind of secret rendezvous!" As Leah put her hands on her hips with that haughty little smirk of hers, I wondered if I could disappear into the floor. What had seemed to be working out so perfectly was turning into a huge disaster.

"Hey now," I guess at this point Edward had taken care of his little- big?- problem and had decided the whole situation was about as funny as I thought it was, because he finally spoke up and now he sounded angry. "Black isn't coming over here and there's no need to be rude. Bella wasn't lying; it's just me and her."

"Oh, are you sure it isn't a two versus one kind of game? That Swan here hasn't tricked the two of you into coming over tonight at different times? Or maybe at the same time for a little more of a crowded kind of fun?" She asked this like it was obvious, which finally made me realize this had gone on enough.

"Excuse me, Leah, but I think you're absolutely crazy. I know you've never liked me much because Jacob and I are good friends, but really there's never been any kind of romantic feelings between either of us. In fact, he always talked about how great you were – to me, you just act like a bitch." I said very pleasantly, glad that I could sound so mature while standing up for myself.

"He talks about me?"

I seem to have forgotten I'm dealing with a crazy.

Seeing as she still looked distrustful, my lasagna was still in the oven getting dangerously close to being a burnt entree, I might've spoken too much, "In fact, to prove I'm not lying about Jacob, how about you stay? There's more than enough lasagna, and this will prove I'm being completely honest with you. Jacob Black is not showing up at this house tonight."

Word vomit, honestly. I think part of me hoped she would take this offer as proof that Jacob would absolutely not be coming over tonight, but as with most word vomit occurrences with me, it seemed to backfire. "Hell yes to lasagna!"

I sent a pleading look to Edward, who seemed to still be at a loss to how this change of guests had occurred. Yeah, me too, buddy.

I rushed into the kitchen, just about to give up on the whole thing, except now I had a full meal to serve and not one, but two guests to host. Well, that is until the doorbell rang again. As I tried to ignore the repeated doorbell (quite obnoxious as it seemed they let their finger stay down upon it), I heard Leah yell, "I knew it!" at the same time Edward muttered from beside me, "Jesus fucking Christ."

The yelling at my front entryway was enough to drive a person to suicide. Just saying.

"Did you invite Josh-whatshisname over?" I heard Edward question softly, and surprise at his question mad the potholder slip, causing me to lightly burn my thumb, but luckily only drop the lasagna on the top of the stove.

"F-ing mother of a!" I broke off, holding my finger, trying to tune out the bickering from Jacob and Leah down the hall, and focused my attention back on Edward. "Of course not," My pain was from my finger and his question, but I tried to huff it off as just the small burn wound. "I don't make Jacob dinner."

For some reason my explanation which didn't exactly make much sense to me seems to appease Edward greatly cause he grinned that crooked grin at me, which just about made me forget my thumb. Unfortunately, nothing could stop me from registering the Leah and Jacob tornado that just entered the kitchen.

"Bella, please tell her you mean nothing to me!" I heard a trace of Jacob's frantic shout, before Leah's voice snapped, "Nothing? Nothing?" My head was whirling at their confusing yelling. These two were more convoluted than any not-even-real relationship I'd ever seen. Well, not including Edward and mine own perhaps.

"Alright, both of you: shut the hell up!" For some reason my yell did quiet them, seeing as I guess my infamous temper had finally blown. I tried to hold on to the reins of it as I saw Edward try to hold in a smile by biting his cheek. He so was not helping right now. "First of all, Jacob followed you here Leah, that's obvious enough to see. Second, since I'm not going to take back my invitation after all this, this is how things are going to go down."

"Don't think that-" Leah started, but one look from me silenced her. Ha! Harmless kitten my ass, take that Edward!

"Leah, you're going to grab the dishes and silverware and set the table with Jacob. Edward, you're going to finish the salad, and I'm going to finish up the lasagna. Then, we're all going to sit down and have a nice meal. When we're done, Edward and I will gladly clean up if the two of you leave. Immediately. Got it?"

"You're going to carry the dishes, and I swear to God if you drop a single plate of the nice Swan's dishware…" Leah redirected the authority to herself, and Jacob took the threat, looking too happy under the current situation. I swear, those two were unexplainable. In my twisted head I saw them being in a Dom/Sub relationship a few years down the line. One guess as to which person would play which part.

As my head was going into territory it never should have ventured, I ran my finger under cool water, noticing only a small red welt, sure to go away within a day. It was then that I noticed Edward staring at me, doing that lovely half-and-half smile of his. Unsure of whether he was laughing at the pure ludicrousness of the entire night or something else… something, well, something like we were doing earlier before Leah's arrival.

"Now, I don't think I'm nearly as bad as Jacob, but I have to say when a woman is commanding like you just were, it does something to me. Are you sure you wouldn't like to tell me exactly how you want the salad finished, ma'am?" The mirth in his eyes led me to believe he was joking outright now, so I pushed him away and laughed.

All things considered, I was surprised I still could after the way phase one of MEP was turning out. God, I don't think things could get much worse. Of course, this was before we sat down to actual dinner.

While I had figured out how to tone down Jacob's and Leah's bickering (which, trust me, was not at all cute like you think couples-who-aren't-really-couples bickering would be), I had not planned on screwing up the one part I had down pat. The freaking lasagna. I don't know if it was the ingredient substitution, the too long in the oven, or maybe the fact that I was just off, but it was awful.

Just barely edible, as Leah didn't fail to mention. Actually, elaborate on. Several times throughout dinner. Jacob got over it pretty soon, as most boys do when it comes to eating things they're not entirely sure they even like. But Edward, no, Edward was different. He swore up and down nothing was wrong with it.

Seriously! Not even a muscle twitch when the first bite hit his tongue, even though I knew it was bad immediately. It was nothing like my usual, and certainly must've been discernible to the man who claimed it was his favorite. But he scarfed it down! Not a crumb left on his plate, not even after seconds!

It was no short of mystifying.

I thought maybe he was just being polite, but as Jacob and Leah took reign of the conversation, and I studied the continuous delight on Edward's face during the entirety of the meal, I realized he truly thought it was delicious. What. The. Hell!

My mind was scrambled from the entirely too eventful night, but I was sure this could not be normal. If Edward really thought that was good lasagna in his stomach – he probably didn't even care how it tasted at all! Maybe he didn't even have taste buds! Maybe he just ate because food was just food to him!

How horrifying!

A man that couldn't even tell the difference between good and bad cooking. I found myself stuck on this one fact even after Jacob and Leah had left me and Edward to clean up. I didn't even realize how upset I was until Edward asked me what was wrong during our cycle of me washing, him drying.

"What do you mean what's wrong?" I didn't want to make any bigger of a deal of this than what had already turned out to be a not-so-low-key dinner. But I didn't know how to stop my voice from catching. It was really a downward spiral from Edward's taste buds to my actual cooking. Maybe I was not even all that good at cooking. What I had mistaken for Edward's constant food enthusiasm might just be his dysfunction.

"I mean, what's wrong?" He said bluntly, disregarding my mind spiral. "You've been quiet since almost the beginning of dinner. I thought maybe it was just because of Tweedledum and Tweedledee, but you still kept frowning even after they're long gone. What's wrong, Bella?"

"I just…" I shook my head, unable to explain myself. I felt tears prick my eyes for a stupid moment, unsure as to why I was taking this so hard. No, wait a minute, I know I'm not a bad cook. Charlie would've been unable to hide anything like that, what with the tact he has. And I can certainly taste the difference between good and bad. "You?"

His hand reached out to stop my hand from scrubbing the last dish. "Bella? Use your words, dear," He tried not to laugh, but I could tell he was frustrated by my frown and lack of explanation.

"I don't know it's just that… It was just such a rush, you know? I even took a shower!" Suddenly, it was pouring out. "I guess you already know it was supposed to be special, what with that brat Leah spilling it out that I worked so hard to get Charlie out of here. Thank God he didn't notice my heels! And then I put together that lasagna and I don't know what the heck I used in it but it was not good! Not at all! Then Leah and Jacob monopolizing the whole dinner conversation with their weird Dom/Sub relationship. It's like, God, buy her a whip already! And, Edward, it wasn't even good! I don't know how you managed seconds when I barely got through the first bit!"

A few tears slipped out, as if I didn't feel ridiculous enough already. Is my period due or something, this cannot be normal. I guess this fit the disastrous evening, what with an end like this though.

"Alright, time for bed," Edward said eventually, after he'd wiped my tears with his thumbs on either side of my face. I wasn't sure if I was glad or not that he decided to ignore my rant. Then again, he might not have been even able to follow it all.

He held my hand as we walked upstairs after putting the dishes in the dishwasher, and I chose not to say anything about why he felt the need to do so. It was as I was going into my room that he paused and tugged my hand lightly bringing me fully into his arms.

"Before you change, I want you to know you look great. And on that note, the whole night was great. Weird, exhausting, and some more weird, but great nonetheless. Entertaining, really. As for your lasagna, Bella, it's great because you made it. No other girl has made me anything from scratch, especially not something edible. I think I'm going to ignore your comments about the whole Dom/Sub with Josh and Leah, because that will give me nightmares before bed," I laughed sleepily, grinning lazily at him, "But thank you, Bella. I don't know what the occasion was, but thank you."

"No occasion, necessary." I muttered embarrassed, letting myself fall forward into him, relaxing fully into the embrace. He didn't need to know about the MEP yet, well, ever, so I tried to hide my face from the real answer.

"Goodnight, love," Was his simple response. I am ashamed to admit my heart tripled pace at that last endearment, but, eh. What are you going to do?

Author's Note- Yeah, I'm back. (Hopefully haha). If you're still with my after the extremely long wait- lots of love to you! I really appreciate it, you have no idea exactly how much. I want to let you know that I can't respond to every review but I of course read them and they are really fabulous! So thank you again and again! And hopefully I can respond to the ones I get from this point on.

A lovely thanks to my beta, jliane!