Countdown to Insanity

Jutsu

'Thinking'

"Talking"

"Biju Talking"

'Biju thinking'

AN: alright before anyone asks, I am not giving up on my other fic. I just got kind of bored writing a serious and rational Naruto. Thus gave birth to this. By the by, yes i did rip the title from the song. the name kind of just fit.

Prologue

"Three, two, one." Cackled a man as he moved away from a heavily guarded area.

Boom! Came the thunderous sound as the complex blew apart.

"Ah hahahhahaha, that was fun." Said the man as he turned around to watch the now burning complex.

"Love the smell of a fire at night". Chuckled the man.

It was hard to tell if the man was actually happy or not. After all his entire face was covered in a deranged comedy mask.

"Ah well, better get back. They tend to worry when I take my time on these missions. Honestly I've yet to fail one, you'd think that that would make them have more faith in me." Muttered the man.

After waiting for a period of time he spoke again.

"What do you mean; they are more worried about the way I do my missions. If I get the job done then the client should be happy. If they wanted me to keep the collateral damage down they better specify next time instead of saying do what you feel is best." Spoke the man again.

This conversation persisted far into the night, as the man slowly trudged back towards his home.

3 days later

"Damn this is boring." Complained a Chunin.

"Deal with it; everyone has a turn on gate duty." Replied his senior, who by now was very tired of his younger companion's complaints.

"Huh, who the hell is that?"

"Oh, fuck. It's Him, "moaned the senior. "just let him through, he's one of ours."

"What do you mean let him through; everyone's got to be checked. No exceptions unless they have passes from the hokage himself."

"Trust me kid, no one could impersonate that man. If you could call him that. Just do you and me a favour and let him pass."

The younger Chunin looked at his senior one more time and proceed to turn around and walked towards the approaching man.

'Damn kids, just don't listen.' Sighed the old guard. 'Oh well can't say I didn't try. Maybe he'll learn something from this.'

Wincing at that last thought the older guard rubbed his abdomen. He still remembered the phantom pain sometimes.

"Hey you, halt. This is the gates of Konoha. To pass you must show your papers, or id number, name, and forehead protector, or proof of citizenship." Roared the young Chunin while putting on what he felt was a confident pose.

He could see the man better now; he was about five foot six with a medium build. He had black hair with crimson streaks which covered the left side of his face/mask. He wore a flack vest with the standard Jounin gear and pants. What really stuck out was the deranged comedy mask, and the fourth hokage like robe. The only difference was that it was bloody crimson with black flames, instead of the traditional red and white.

"Who are you, and how dare you wear that mockery of the Yondaime's garb." Accused the young guard.

The man just stood there for a moment and then turned his head sideways as if he was studying him.

"Well, since you look like a Nin, present your id number and protector before I am forced to apprehend you." Said the now unnerved Chunin.

There was something extremely creepy about this guy.

"Hahahahahahha, tell me are you new?" asked the man.

"What?" questioned the Chunin.

"I said are you new?" stated the man again.

"Yea, I was recently promoted to Chunin." Stated the guard.

"Are you sure you want to state my name and proof?" question the man mockingly.

"Yes," grounded out the guard in a pissed and offended mood.

"Ok, then." Grinned the man behind his mask.

"My name is Uzumaki Naruto," then disappeared in a blur.

"What the hell?" cried the Chunin as the world around him disappeared.

Everything was now in an enthral black and white. Kind of like the negatives of a photo.

"This is my proof of admission," came an insane and disembodied voice.

With that shadows started to dance and noise began to sprout from every crevice. The Chunin guard could hear his heart racing through his chest.

"Arghhhhhh" screamed the guard.

"Did you really have to do that to the kid? He's new you know." Sighed the old guard.

"Hehehe, yea of course. It's how I personally initiate new guards that bug me." Laughed Naruto as he walked around the younger guard's twitching body.

"Hey it you old man, you asked me the same stupid question a year back." Laughed Naruto.

"He was just doing his job," muttered the older guard as he went and collected the now unconscious junior.

"Well, then he should know of his more infamous seniors, I doubt he would have asked Kakashi for proof." Came the still annoying sing song voice of Naruto.

"Yea, yea. So how long this kid going to be out." Asked the older guard.

"I don't know. Depends on how big a pansy the kid is, I mean can't even break a low level genjutsu. That just sad." Said a mocking tone Naruto as he proceeded through the gates.

AN: ok and that's the prologue for this story. Tell me what you think. As always if you spot an error pleas point it out to me and I'll revise it as soon as possible.