Chapter 13

Sorry this update is incredibly late (I say that at the start of all my chapters now). I've had most of it written for a while, but I wanted to make it a bit longer before I posted it. I figured maybe you'd prefer a shorter chapter now than a long one in 2020! So this isn't the longest I've ever written, but it'll do. I had no guesses about Sulpicia, no one looked her up and told me, which was a shame but I think you'll like it.

"Wait, someone I should meet? Who?"

"Sulpicia."

"Sulpicia? She's still… alive?" I was dumbfounded.

"Of course. And she'd like to speak to you."

"Where is she?"

"In the building. She came from Rome to see you."

"What?"

"She travelled from-"

"Under her own wishes?"

"Of course."

"But, she's… When can I see her?"

"Straight away." Edward reached into his pocket and drew out his phone, and texted something quickly. "She'll come straight up."

I stood up. This was too much to get my head around.

"Do you have to be here?" I asked Edward quietly.

"I should, but I can go outside if you wish." I nodded, and he got up and left. Shortly after, there was a quiet knock at my door.

"Come in." I whispered.

The door opened and a lady walked in. She was beautiful, with long mahogany hair framing her heart-shaped face, and deep brown eyes framed with intricate make-up, and her full lips lined and painted with a beautiful deep shade. She was taller than me, and wore much more sophisticated clothing- sling-back heels with a black dress covered with a white suit jacket, and with any possible flaw in her dark Italian face eradicated with expertly applied make-up, but apart from that, she was identical to me.

I was meeting Sulpicia Romanov- my mother.

Despite her beauty and dress, which spoke volumes about her confidence, she looked just as nervous as I suddenly felt. In fact, her eyes- so much like mine- looked watery. We stood staring at each other, trying to catch up with 18 years in which we hadn't seen each other, for what seemed like an age before she spoke.

"Bella?" Her voice was also exactly like mine, in pitch, tone, accent, edge.

I didn't know how to address her. She wasn't my 'Mom', I'd never had one of those, but I couldn't call her Miss Romanov, either.

"Yes."

"What happened to you?" We asked at the same time. She was looking at my scars- shown openly on my arms by the shirt I was wearing, left from yesterday, and the reopened wound on my leg, where the marks from where I'd dug my nails in last night still remained. I knew my face was probably carrying obvious marks of my sobbing as well- my eyes felt dry and red. I couldn't believe the speed at which things were happening- I had only just learned about my dear Jacob's death, I was being asked to help the people who had kidnapped me against people who had tortured me and killed my Jacob and now I was meeting my mother- the woman who I had believed was dead for years.

"I suppose you need to know everything. Would you sit?" She asked me- in my 'own room'. I sat on my bed. She sat in the chair Jacob and Edward had often sat in.

"I thought you were dead." I stated, trying to keep my voice even. I was having so many conflicting emotions, the only one I could understand was confusion.

"I know. And trust me, it had to be that way. I should start at the beginning.

Just before I was about to leave school, I got kicked out of my parent's home. My father was arrested for selling drugs, and my mother had to go into hospital because she wasn't emotionally stable. My father also had a serious debt problem, so the house and contents were sold to attempt to cover it. All this left me on the streets. I had only had two weeks sleeping on a street corner, though, when I was found. By the Cullen Clan.

I had lost everything. I couldn't go to my private school any more, I didn't have any way of contacting my friends and they made no effort to find me if they had heard what happened- friends and a boyfriend I thought would stick with me through everything. But the Cullens had been watching my father, because he had had dealings with the Volturi before, and they knew of my predicament. And someone mentioned it to Carlisle Cullen.

Carlisle is an amazing man, Bella. He really is. He was still quite young then, and the Cullen Clan had only just really got it's name. But he didn't have the best upbringing either, and he sympathised with me. So he sent out men to find me. At first I managed to elude them, escape them. I thought maybe they were my father's customers or debtors, come to get revenge on him by kidnapping me. So I went into hiding on the streets.

But I still visited my mother. And one day when I went to see her, a month after hiding from the Clan's men, Carlisle was there, waiting for me. He explained what he did, and why there were men looking for me. I didn't trust him. I didn't trust anyone. But he gave me clothes and money, and offered to put me back into school to finish my exams. I kept asking- what's the catch? Who are you? But he said that he knew of my problems, and wanted to help. I asked how, he told me his organisation had been watching my father because they thought he was connected with an organised crime association, by the name of the Volturi. And so he knew about my predicament.

And I was about to refuse when my mother started speaking- and I hadn't heard her talk in the last two months, so it distracted me. She was talking nonsense- she couldn't have understood what I was going through, or what I was having to decide, but it made me think: What have I got to lose? I had nothing- nothing, on the streets, with the possibility of being raped or murdered every night anyway. So I agreed. And he kept his word, he put me back through school, and even offered to put me through university. But by then I'd heard enough about his organisation, and I was grateful to the man who had saved my life, enough to want to be a part of it.

And so, for about three months, I did. But then this opening with the Volturi came up, and it was perfect for me to walk in, as a spy. I was virtually unknown, and I hadn't been with the Cullens long enough that they'd noticed me. And the Cullen Clan weren't as much of a threat to them then anyway. So I slipped into their network, small at first.

But I found I had a way with people. I could get them to listen to me, agree with me and do what I wanted. And that was invaluable. Especially as everyone there barely listened to anyone- it gave me an advantage.

Then I met Aro. He was also, just rising in the organisation. Our promotions and fieldwork were mirroring each other- we were very competitive. And then, two years later, there was the promotion to be in charge. The old 'head' had just been murdered under curious circumstances, and by that stage it was obvious that the replacement was between Aro and I. That's when we started trying to kill each other.

Don't get me wrong, we didn't really hate each other- well, I guess we did- but we both really wanted to get there. It was a life-changing opportunity. So I hired two snipers to trail him and shoot him in the street. Killing your opponents is just the kind of act that promotes you to head of an organisation like the Volturi.

But he outwitted them. And he had bombs placed in my car, he had a stalker follow me, set fire to my apartment etc. I returned his gifts with bribing a fellow employee to stab him- she was thrown out of a window, poor thing- stifling drugs into his home and calling the police- which he bribed away- and one day I even considered somehow getting my gun into work. But we were searched whenever we entered, and they had tightened security so I didn't think it would work.

In the end, he got the promotion, as you know. Had I got it, I would have managed to finish the Volturi. I would've died doing it, I know, but I would've stopped them.

But by then, I had an idea. I heard the Volturi were merging with a Japanese crime agency, after five years of organising it, and thought maybe, if the Cullen Clan tweaked their place in society- they were already sort of freelancers for the government- and started doing the dirtier jobs, the Volturi might be interested in a merge.

So, by my persuasion- he was very reluctant- Carlisle changed the face of the Cullen Clan. Once talk of them had risen within the Volturi, I mentioned merger to Aro. He was immediately very mistrusting- whether of me or them I don't know, but he was very perceptive- he could almost read minds. I always had to be very careful around him. He really didn't want to do it. But I had the rest of the board around my little finger, and within the week they were all pro-merger. It was only him.

He was suspicious about how they had become so powerful over such a short period of time. And in the current climate of political change, they were getting more work than ever. And because it was rumoured that the reasons they always managed to pull off great stunts- that were somehow politically relevant- they guessed that they worked for the government. And this also meant they were extremely well funded- very important for the Volturi, obviously. So he began to consider it. But he was terrified of being double-crossed by them, I think. So I suggested he put his own flesh and blood into a conference room. I had the idea of a child- a Volturi child- being brought up and put in a conference room. A child who would be able to read others like he could, and push everything to the Volturi's advantage.

He began to warm to the idea. A son to carry on the Volturi after him was attractive too, I think. And then he had to think about who would mother the child. Instantly heads looked my way, as if I'd planned it all along. And actually, it sounded perfect to me.

I hadn't fallen in love with Aro, but it was the closest I ever got to falling in love- except for- never mind. Despite his cold nature, the way his mind worked was close to mine, and he was very attractive, and every conversation between us had enough of an edge that sparks flew. And so he, without ever really properly discussing or planning it, slept with me for a while. And it was amazing. You were born from fireworks, Bella.

And so I fell pregnant, in the next month. And suddenly my life was so much more valuable- I had armed guards follow me everywhere. I practically lived in the offices- I didn't want to lose a second of my hard-earned position. Or time with Aro. Because I knew, intuitively, by then that it was coming to an end. I knew I wouldn't last to see my child grow up. And not only was my life more valuable because I was carrying you, but Aro's feelings for me had grown too.

And I think that's why, after I'd had you, there were more and more attempts on my life. I don't think Aro ever wanted me dead then, but he would rather he shot me himself than someone kidnap me and use me to get to him. And that made me hate him more. I didn't… love him any less, but I hated him more. I was so valuable to him, but everyone was worthless to him. He's always been like that. And I think he was paying some of the people who were trying to finish me off. So we decided it was time for me to disappear.

And yes, I was leaving a young baby, a young, innocent baby, in the hands of the Volturi. But if we were ever going to stop the Volturi, it was a necessary step. I think Carlisle started planning then, that you would be kidnapped when you started negotiating, though he didn't tell me. And he also started planning then, I fear, that you would be the tool to bring down the Volturi. I never intended that for you. I always took that to be my own job.

But I didn't manage.

So it seems we really do need you. The Volturi is now a huge organisation, and it seems it won't work to send you back. But you must know enough to help finish them now. I hate to put you in this position, but you've seen what they do, you've, from what I hear, recently been personally affected by their actions… and so you must agree. They must be stopped. And you've- "

She stopped herself, and looked at me searchingly. In concern, or trying to discern my answer I couldn't tell.

I suddenly felt exhausted. As if I'd just lived through all she had without a night of sleep, my heart and mind were still weeping for Jacob, I'd just met my mother who I'd believed was dead for eighteen years… and she was making me decide whether I was going to be the one who would finish the organisation that had created my birth, raised me, controlled my life- a decision I couldn't escape, and I knew that the answer I was unavoidably going to give would end with my demise within the next few months. But I also knew what my mother had been about to say, it hung in the air.

I didn't have anything left to lose.

I was aware of her leaving the room, and I gradually sank back off my bed to the floor.

Everything she told me echoed in my ears.

My mother was alive. And she worked for the Cullen Clan. She had always worked for the Cullen Clan. I hadn't been born for the merger every day of my childhood prepared me for, with the scars to show for it, I hadn't even been born for the freedom I had begun to feel with Jacob. I had been born to destroy.

Would I ever be happy? Would I ever be able to live a normal life? Love like a normal person, fall in love with someone I could grow old with, have children and worry about normal things like… I couldn't even name any.

But I had a responsibility, somehow. I knew it. Ordinary people, who could have futures I could never have, were in danger every day due to these people. And if I couldn't live that life myself, what could I do but give it to them? Sacrifice my life, which was always going to be wasted anyway, for the sake of those people…

Part of me was saying, but you don't have a choice anyway. If I went down to the conference room now, and said I wanted no part of it, what would they do to me? If they threw me out- what did I have? What could I do? Nothing. I'd wonder back to a town on the unfamiliar roads, until I was spotted, identified and killed. They wouldn't, of course. They wanted my help too much. They'd start really pushing me- I wouldn't put it past them to push Edward my way again, to try and manipulate me that way. And if I continued refusing, they might even try torture, which would always be futile with me. Just leave me with more scars.

So I had to do this. And they would kill me. I knew that- I knew the risk, I knew how big this decision was. It didn't hurt or surprise me that even my mother had put me in a position where I would die. The Volturi were huge. Their branches had now spread worldwide, and their agents were everywhere. Killing the Volturi here would just send them somewhere else. But I had to believe I could do it. I had been told a lot about the Volturi, but not the extent. They didn't even trust me enough. But I could deduce a lot. I had my eyes open all the time- there were things I'd worked out, guessed, calculated. I knew I had to- I would one day be part of it. Well, I thought I would.

Once again, I was just a puppet. No choices, driven by the morals of whoever had me within their grasp.

I wondered what I would have to do. Tell them all I knew, certainly. What else?

I wondered what Sulpicia- I couldn't call her Mom in my mind- was telling them. That I was going to say yes? How well did she know me? Had she kept track of me for the last few months, or had she been unaware of everything? Why was I only meeting her now? If I had had a daughter who I'd had to leave, I would spend every day thinking of her, I was sure. And if I knew she had come back into my world- kidnapped or not- I would make every effort to see her.

And now, she had only deigned to appear because I needed persuading to agree with them. The Cullens had played a card against me that I didn't think they had, and I felt manipulated again, just like with Edward. These people might have good intentions, but they treated me like a pawn on a chessboard. Important, in my own way, with powerful potential, but still small and dispensable enough to put on the front line.

But it was what I had to do. I had to decide where my loyalty lay, and give it my all.

Because there was no point dying for nothing.

If I was going to try, I was going to succeed.

So I got up, cleaned up in the bathroom, dressed myself in black- to mourn for the years I knew I would now lose- and went down to the conference room. It was empty, but a lady working on a desk nearby said Carlisle's office was in the next building.

I went over, wondering what I was going to say. I knocked lightly on the door with the plaque 'Carlisle Cullen'.

"Come in." I opened the door. Carlisle sat at a desk, his hands folded in front of him. It looked so normal- he could have been a headmaster.

"Good morning, Bella. Please sit down."

"Morning, Carlisle."

"How can I help you?"

"I've been thinking about your… proposition, and as you know, I'm going to accept."

"You are agreeing to helping us to finish the Volturi?"

"Yes." There was a silence. I wasn't sure what to do.

"I'm glad to hear that, Bella. We will start with some strategic meetings, where you will have to answer a lot of questions. You will be involved in planning, and then we will send you for some training. We know you have had training with the Volturi, but we want to know what you can do and what you are good at."

"All right."

"You will stay in the room you are in at the moment, all meetings will take place here. The first one will be tomorrow morning. I'll see you at dinner."

"Will Sulpicia be there?"

"Maybe." He started reading a file on his desk, I was clearly dismissed.

I left, somehow feeling shaky and broken. Had I just agreed to die? Had I just submitted myself to one of the powers that had always driven my life- unbeknown to me?

But it wasn't like I had anything to live for. My Jacob was the only possible turn my life could have taken which would have taken me out of this situation, but his death seemed to end that- and with him any possibilities that I could have turned away. Like his death had been driven by fate. And true, the proposition had finally arrived only a day after I heard of his death. And then I had met my mother- by she wasn't anything to live for either. She had only just come to meet me- even after being kidnapped the first time by her own organisation, and had only done so to persuade me to do something which would support her own interests. Something that would also kill me.

But I had so rarely broken down in my life- twice actually- that to feel this horrible shaky sensation, like I was about to crumble, was horrible. My head was incredibly light and my eyes couldn't focus on anything and my head was lolling around. I was exhausted and emotionally I was the equivalent of someone who had just been whirred in a blender.

Then I lurched forward. My eyes closed so I heard the thud as my head hit the floor rather than feeling or seeing it.

When I awoke it was pitch black, and I wasn't on the floor any more. I was on my bed, and there was a familiar figure in the chair.

"Edward?" I slurred sleepily. He immediately moved to the bedside.

"Do you feel all right?" He murmured. I felt too weak to push him away- he was too close.

"Mm…" I replied foggily. He touched my forehead gently- I flinched back at first, but his hands were comfortingly cold. I must have hit my head quite hard.

"I think you should eat something, Bella. You missed dinner and you might have concussion."

"I'm… just tired. I'm fine…" I whispered, sleep pulling over me again.

"Come on, Bella, wake up. You need to eat."

"No…" I mumbled, trying to turn away from him but all my limbs being too heavy.

"If you don't sit up and wake up, I'll make you." I giggled slightly at that, keeping my eyes shut.

"Fine." He replied. I didn't even respond, my eyes feeling weighted by my mind and holding shut. They opened pretty fast when I felt his lips on my cheek. I looked straight into his eyes, angry.

"Come on, up. Or I'll do worse than that." My eyes widened, knowing he had me. So I tried to get up, but I could barely move. He misinterpreted my stillness, and moved forward but I managed to move away, muttering,

"I'm getting up, wait a second." With effort, I propped myself up on the bed. He reached over to the windowsill, where there was a plate of food. I was so out of it I didn't even register what it was. I could barely pick it up with my fingers. Edward's hand closed over mine, and he fed me with his other. I couldn't protest or move away.

And I suppose, somewhere deep down, I appreciated someone trying to care for me.

So I'll try to post the next chapter soon- but all my readers know I'm not the best at that. However, reviews are really good motivation- I've posted this because of TheRealSlytherinPrincess's five reviews, and Batman Keda's recent review which told me I hadn't been forgotten. Thank you guys!

Also, TheRealSlytherinPrincess said that, for the last chapter 'Me without you' by Ashley Tisdale really goes with the second half- she's right! And if you're not a HSM fan (like me- sorry, but I hate it) it's nothing like that, it's a great song. So please re-read that chapter, listening to it.

If anyone else has any music suggestions or thoughts, please tell me them. Please review this! Seriously, if you want more updates, I just need to have more support- there's nothing like pouring your heart into writing something to find it's not enough to connect to readers.